"Anonymous Confessions: The legend of pissbitch".

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Stunt_enby: Feb 6, 2010; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

dog buttz posted:

I'd be willing to bet a lot of people think their siblings, parents, cousins, etc. are hot and be attracted to them if they saw a naked picture and didn't know it was them because the face was blurred out.

any free porn site validates my hypothesis.

how much time have you spent going over this scenario in your head?

# ? Aug 5, 2016 18:26

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# ? May 10, 2024 07:08

Bonzo: Mar 11, 2004; Just like Mama used to make it!

Sorry to derail but CYE is best because it's basically uncensored George and no laugh track

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CxRH-zYcIA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7BgOYPNTlA

# ? Aug 5, 2016 23:51

Tolkien minority: Feb 14, 2012

loquacius posted:

Hey as long as we're naming famous cousinfuckers of history, Albert Einstein's second wife was his first cousin on one side and his second cousin on the other side

fake-edit: and that cousinfucker's name... was Albert Einstein

Zorodius posted:

And Edgar Allen Poe

and the holy prophet Muhammad (PBUH). One of his wives, Zaynab bint Jahsh, was not only his cousin, but was also divorced from his adopted son.

McGavin posted:

You know who else was a cousin fucker? Charles Darwin. Makes you think.

you know i always thought cousin fuckin was bad but if all these dudes that were way smarter than me were into it maybe its... good?

# ? Aug 6, 2016 00:31

McGavin: Sep 18, 2012

Profondo Rosso posted:

you know i always thought cousin fuckin was bad but if all these dudes that were way smarter than me were into it maybe its... good?

Genetically speaking it's relatively fine, with around a 5-7% chance of having a flipper baby, compared to a 3-4% chance of having a flipper baby for two unrelated people.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 01:00

RatHat: Dec 31, 2007; A tiny behatted rat👒🐀!

McGavin posted:

Genetically speaking it's relatively fine, with around a 5-7% chance of having a flipper baby, compared to a 3-4% chance of having a flipper baby for two unrelated people.

It's about the same as if the mother is over 40 iirc.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 01:13

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

I creep the Post Your Selfie thread to ogle cute goonettes, except the only two attractive ones are Literally a Bird and Sweet as Sin. Every other lady poster is fat or gross, every male poster is an unredeemable goblin, and the whole thread is a ridiculous circle-jerking hugbox where uggo's compliment each others pictures because they know other people have to complement theirs. SaS and LaB need to stop teasing and show their tits already.

quote:

I spent most of my life obese and only lost weight in my 30s a few years ago. Once I lost it and felt good about myself I started getting laid but when I meet a new woman I still show her a picture of fat me in my 20s and give her a sob story about how I'm still trying to find my confidence, it works every time.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:24

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

i want to chime in on the veteran discussion but want to do it anonymously; the reason we give veterans benefits is because most of them are really hosed up in the head and know how to kill people, and the military trains them to snap and... kill people. if we don't pacify the angry hulkmen with discounts and special lines and fake praise then they're just going to start flipping out and killing people. we don't do it because we actually like them we do it because we're scared of them

quote:

I have a thing for Asian women.

It goes beyond having "a bit of a thing" for them, actually. It's almost at the point where I can't even get hard thinking about women from any other background. Yes, I know it's weird and creepy to fetishize an entire ethnicity, but I can't help myself. Black hair, almond eyes, brown skin... I just can't resist. The last three women I dated were Chinese, Cambodian and Vietnamese respectively and in each case I made an effort to learn about the culture and learn a bit of the language.

I swear it's not some "western women are spoiled" MRA bullshit, and it's not some otaku loser thing, I don't even like anime. Now that I think about it, I think it goes back to my 5th grade teacher who was Japanese, and also a girl in the year above me whose parents immigrated from Vietnam.

My boss is a drop-dead gorgeous Chinese woman, and even though she's married and has kids, I would bang the poo poo out of her if the opportunity presented itself.

also somehow I found out that a good friend of mine has a fetish for having women put cigarettes out on him. I'm wracking my brain trying to figure this one out, it combines the two least attractive things in the world, smoking and burn scars.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:25

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

I idolize the movie Leaving Las Vegas and I hope to die the same as Nicholas Cage's character.

quote:

I loving hate Chinese people. I've always been open and traveled a lot, had many international friends. But to me Chinese people are a bunch of narcissistic, rude, self entitled, self centered, materialistic assholes. It's not a racial thing as I don't mind other Asians, hell I don't even mind Chinese people from Hong Kong, Taiwan, Singapore etc, or 2nd generation+ overseas Chinese. But Mainland Chinese people I loving hate so much. I often go out of my way to be rude and piss off Chinese people and give me an immense satisfaction. I often have fantasies about hurting or killing Chinese people, I've never acted out on it, but I'm afraid I'll one day snap and do something stupid. I think most of the world current problems are due to China and I hope China as a country and society will crumble. I hate China and the Chinese, and I think every decent human being should as well.

That's my confession, thanks for reading!

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:25

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

To the goon who thinks about nailing his cousin.

I too have a seriously hot cousin I always got on with very well and one time when I stayed at her place overnight, it just kinda happened. The sex was actually amazing and the fact we were not supposed to do it was like a kinky bonus. Needless to say, we never did it again. Today I am in a stable relationship, she is happily married with two kids, nobody in the family knows and we still get along.

If you choose to push your luck, you should be absolutely sure she really "leaned into your boner on purpose" and that she can keep it to herself before you make any advances. Otherwise you could be in a world of hurt family-wise.

quote:

In the last confession thread I explained that I was older (late 30's) guy who was unexpectedly developing an interest in, not to put too fine a line on it, cock. Not in a relationship way, but in a purely physical way.

It turns out that if you post about it on Craigslist, and explain yourself fairly well, you'll get a lot of responses from guys in similar situations. Of those, somewhere around 75-80% will be too weird/intense/nonsensical.

But there will also be a handful (no pun intended) of replies that come from reasonably normal, sane men who are local, not hambeasts, and understand discretion.

I guess my confession is that I have a new hobby.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:26

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

This might be late for cousin chat but me and my cousin lost our virginity to each other when I was 15 (she was 14). Her mom/my aunt found the condom wrapper that she saved for some stupid reason and she told her what happened. My aunt got me alone and said she would tell everyone in the family unless I had sex with her too, so I did.

The sex with my aunt was better even though in hindsight it was really gross and highly illegal of her to do to me. So I guess what I'm saying to that guy is skip the cousin and bone your aunt instead.

quote:

i have been a member oif a guerilla marketing contract company for quite a few years now and sa si just one of the places i 'work' at. its mostly videogames nd movie publishers we do stuff for and its the best job ever. it used to bea bout shilling for the hotest new thing wich woud give us away but things changed over time and now they prety much pay me to shitpost all day. namaste

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:37

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

My junior year of high school I was dating a girl who was pretty, smart, and ambitious. Her whole life was focused around getting into an ivy league. I was a goon who cared more about video games and comic books but my parents were loaded so they let me drive a car they weren�t going to use, which would either be a Mercedes or an Escalade. I seriously think she was dating me just to be seen in one of those vehicles. I didn�t care because we had sex once or twice a week and I thought I was lucky to have sex at all.

One day I saw that she was texting a lot more than usual. I got a chance to snoop on her phone and she was sexting with some guy in one of her classes. I immediately dumped her. The next day word got around that I broke up with her and during lunch someone asked why. I glibly said that her pussy smelled like a rotting fish on a hot day. It was some immature throwaway but apparently the other nerds I ate lunch with thought it was hilarious and by the end of the day, everyone knew that my now ex had a reeking vagina. Apparently this hit her so hard that she didn�t go to school the next day.

Eventually her best friend went up to me and told me that it was hilarious. I felt bad that my ex�s best friend hated her guts but I didn�t have a lot of sympathy for her at the moment. My ex�s �bestie� wanted to see her suffer so she would grill me for facts to use against her. So I did because gently caress it, why not. I got bored of it but the bestie really wanted to torment her so if I balked at something, she would flash me, send me nudes, and one time she blew me because she wanted me to crack open her private Photobucket. I did it all because I was a weak goon and the best friend was even hotter than my ex.

My ex�s family got fed up with the bullying and called my parents to threaten pressing charges if I didn�t stop. I laid all the blame on her best friend but they knew that a ditsy 17 year old girl lacked the knowledge to break into a Photobucket account or hacking into her Facebook. My ex eventually started cracking under the bullying and had to change schools. By that time, her grades suffered so much that there was no chance she would get into an ivy now. She wound up going to community college and married an auto mechanic when she was 19. I was a slacker and did go to an ivy league school thanks to some great letters of recommendation from businessmen and politicians you�ve likely heard of. The best friend also landed well and is now married to a powerful family in the area.

I guess life isn�t fair after all.

quote:

he has a live-in girlfriend and a nice dog. he has multiple successful careers, all things considered. (read: arts and able to get by/travel.) he might be close to twice my age. he could put my body in a dumpster any time we meet. and i'm in love.

everything about this makes me sick but i can't stop thinking about him. his nickname for me is really loving condescending but i'm encouraging it like the sick gently caress i am.

i never thought i deserved to be alive. i never wanted to kill myself after the one time i sincerely tried. but some horrible part of me feels like i'm gonna end up dying at his hands, maybe even while he's loving me, and this isn't something i ever wanted but it also feels predestined.

i'm scared and i don't care.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:37

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

I think I'm probably a functional psychopath. I would never kill anyone, or do anything illegal, because I'm a scrawny, affluent, white guy who grew up in the suburbs and I am terrified of prison. On 9/11 I did not give a single poo poo. While everyone else was glued to the TV, I was reading a beta version of the AD&D 3rd edition rulebook wondering what the big deal was.

I went to a private school from K-12 and I hated virtually everyone there. Nuevo-riche pieces of poo poo. I was not wealthy at all, and only was able to attend because my parents were employees of the school. Needless to say, by about 8th grade, people legitimately thought that I was going to blow the school up. I cultivated this persona, mostly because I was a giant pussy and thought this was an effective deterrent for bullies, but also because I genuinely found catharsis in Columbine and to this day, nearly 20 years later, I still fantasize about killing my classmates.

In college, getting my (surprise!) STEM degree, I made some friends my freshman year mostly because I was forced to live in the dorms. As I progressed in school, however, my depression, anxiety, and general insanity pushed virtually everyone away from me. My behavior gradually became more erratic as time went on, until I was living alone in a lovely slumlord apartment block and stopped going to class entirely. Instead, I would re-watch the same South Park episodes over and over while getting excessively drunk and hitting on girls I knew from high school over AIM. I subsisted almost entirely on pizza/chicken wings/alcohol delivery that I could order online so I wouldn't have to speak to a human being. I was dating a woman even more insane than I was and she made me even more miserable. "We" got a cat that lived at my apartment. Sometimes I would torture it. I'm surprised none of my neighbors ever called the police. Eventually, she threatened to kill herself and I told her to do it, but not to make a mess in my apartment. Needless to say, that called her bluff and also ended our relationship.

Facing the near certainty that even with an engineering degree, my crippling social anxiety and complete lack of social skills would prevent me from ever finding a job, I threw a hail Mary and applied to become an officer in the military. Shortly after that submission, I dropped my classes for the term, went home, and fessed up to my parents (who thought I was doing well, since I lied to everyone in my life about virtually everything) how depressed and lovely I was. I got into therapy, got medication, and got a lot...better.

I went back to school, met a girl, finished my degree, got commissioned, moved across the country, got married, and things were finally looking good.

Not for long, though. Our marriage was really rocky. Both of us were pretty mentally ill, with varying degrees of successful treatment. I had sex with another woman during a training TDY, unbeknownst to anyone else. I didn't give a gently caress. She tried to contact me several times later but I ghosted the gently caress out of her.

I went off the deep end, big time. While managing to appear fine during the day, at one point, I drank a bunch and took a bunch of ativan, grabbed my glock, and drove to a Wal-Mart with the intent of killing everyone I saw and then killing myself. I ended up calling a dear female friend (not my wife) in my car in the parking lot, who talked me out of it, and, while balling my eyes out, managed to call a local friend to come pick me up. I changed meds again and I was alright, for a while.

During a trip to Las Vegas, I called the cops on my wife, telling them she was going to kill herself. Not because I thought she actually was, but because I was pissed off and wanted to hit on other women during our vacation. We reconciled and went home, but it was downhill from here.

I ended up getting a DUI making an illegal U-turn out of a sketchy rear end strip club. I was there in a "last hurrah", hoping to get high, gently caress a stripper, and then kill myself. Since I failed to gently caress a stripper, and no one there had any drugs, the cops who arrested me technically saved my life that night. Thankfully I didn't have my gun that time or that night would have been a LOT worse.

The next few months was more therapy (individual and marriage), more med changes (at one point I was taking lexapro, seroquel, trazodone, and restoril ["as needed", which, lol, was basically every waking second of the day. I have a benzo problem.]) Things were stable for a while, until my court case ended and I lost my driving privileges.

I hated my life, my wife, everything. I found solace in drinking, hitting on women on Tinder, and binge watching TV shows. I was doing well at work and no one had any idea what was going on.

Funny thing was, my wife felt the exact same way. She found a male "friend" on Tinder, and started having an affair. At the exact same time, I was having an affair with a "friend" I met on Tinder.

Long story short this all exploded and we very nearly got divorced. Only, this time, we got really good therapy, moved to somewhere that didn't so closely resemble hell on Earth, and finally got our meds, mood, and habits in a decent place.

We've been maintaining this homeostasis for about 2 years now, and it's been good. I've come clean about most stuff, as has she, and I think we're alright for the time being.

The confession piece? That female friend of mine, who prevented me from killing myself? I flew across the country, tracked her down, and told her I loved her. I didn't, and don't. She rejected me, and I didn't care at all. I flew back and pretended it never happened. Oh well!

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:38

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

Okay, this was the entire backlog of unposted confessions.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 08:41

yeah I eat ass: Mar 14, 2005; only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar

That was a shitload of words that could be entirely replaced by "I'm an unstable sadbrains goon" and still cover all the main points. Your problems aren't unique or special, you aren't a ~psychopath~.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 09:41

Yorkshire Pudding: Nov 24, 2006

Hates Chinese People goon, do you masturbate to the Chinese Farmers thread?

Oh good, we've reached that point of the confessions thread. "I ruined a gorgeous, popular, intelligent girls life and dont even care LOL" and "I am a psychopath" posts.

Yorkshire Pudding fucked around with this message at 10:04 on Aug 7, 2016

# ? Aug 7, 2016 09:59

Zzulu: May 15, 2009; (â°ËvËâ°)

I like it when girls slap my rear end

# ? Aug 7, 2016 10:09

Cumslut1895: Feb 18, 2015; by FactsAreUseless

Zorodius posted:

and the holy prophet Muhammad (PBUH). One of his wives, Zaynab bint Jahsh, was not only his cousin, but was also divorced from his adopted son.

one of his wives was a six year old girl sooooo

# ? Aug 7, 2016 11:57

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SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.

quote:

But there will also be a handful (no pun intended) of replies that come from reasonably normal, sane men who are local, not hambeasts, and understand discretion.

I guess my confession is that I have a new hobby.

I like this one because it has a happy ending

# ? Aug 7, 2016 12:35

Groovelord Neato: Dec 6, 2014

Tequila Sunrise posted:

Hates Chinese People goon, do you masturbate to the Chinese Farmers thread?

Oh good, we've reached that point of the confessions thread. "I ruined a gorgeous, popular, intelligent girls life and dont even care LOL" and "I am a psychopath" posts.

she cheated on him. seems fair play.

Zorodius posted:

I like this one because it has a happy ending

many happy endings by the sounds of things.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 12:52

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

The first half of the hates-Chinese-people confession I was like "yeah people who work at museums always tell me the Chinese tourists are the worst ones hahaha-" and then I got to the fantasizing-about-killing-them part and I was like "oh :stare:

# ? Aug 7, 2016 13:22

Yorkshire Pudding: Nov 24, 2006

Groovelord Neato posted:

she cheated on him. seems fair play.

I was talking more about it being Nerd Revenge Fantasy fiction.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 13:29

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

I used to live with a decently well-known (but not well-liked/funny) FYAD poster. One night while I was drunk and passed out on the couch I woke up to him sucking me off. I pretended to still be asleep and let him finish. I never knew whether he realized I was awake or not but it never happened again and we never talked about it. I did sleep on the couch more often trying to get him to do it again though but I guess once was enough.

He killed himself a couple years later and I regret never thanking him for it before he died.

quote:

I'm a former heroin addict in my late 20's. I've been using opiates since I was 14, started shooting when I was 19. I managed to get clean 3 years ago now by really tackling the issues behind my drug use and depression through counseling and medication. I've gotten clean before but never took it seriously, this time it was different. I never thought I'd live to 30, I figured I would od or commit suicide by then so I never gave much thought or planning into my future. Since then I've enrolled in a college program I love, and I'm either among the top students, or the top student in all my classes. The job market for my field is great, and I will be graduating in a year. However, even though I'm one of the top students in the program, I also have more than one criminal conviction. They are for non violent crimes but serious nonetheless. I am terrified that after all this I won't be able to find a job in my field and will be forced to continue working the type of menial retail type jobs I am currently qualified for. I don't know how I would handle this let down. I try to remain positive but we'll see.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 13:38

Pershing: Feb 21, 2010; John "Black Jack" Pershing
Hard Fucking Core

Where the hell is the Post Your Selfie thread? Checked the first three pages of PYF and nothing...

Heroin goon: ever thought of expungment?

# ? Aug 7, 2016 13:53

Groovelord Neato: Dec 6, 2014

speaking of fyad it's sad that the guy who made the best sa post ever turned out to be a brokebrain who had some sort of twitter drama meltdown.\

Pershing posted:

Where the hell is the Post Your Selfie thread? Checked the first three pages of PYF and nothing...

Heroin goon: ever thought of expungment?

it used to be post your picture. it owned when some guy with a stupid old timey haircut and bad stache posted his and everyone made fun of him and he did a rolling with the punches/puppetmaster thing.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 14:10

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

Pershing posted:

Where the hell is the Post Your Selfie thread? Checked the first three pages of PYF and nothing...

Heroin goon: ever thought of expungment?

I don't think that applies since the confession mentions more than one conviction.

Groovelord Neato posted:

speaking of fyad it's sad that the guy who made the best sa post ever turned out to be a brokebrain who had some sort of twitter drama meltdown.\

What post is that?

# ? Aug 7, 2016 14:13

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

Alas for poor niggerstomper58, who would have ever thought that such a mild-mannered soul would attract Internet drama

# ? Aug 7, 2016 14:27

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

In all my years of being here I don't think I've spent more than 5 or 10 minutes in FYAD. Hell, I posted in LF and YCS and still never really bothered with it.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 14:28

Groovelord Neato: Dec 6, 2014

H.H posted:

What post is that?

http://www.tehposts.com/fiction/was-i-picked-on-in-middle-school.html

# ? Aug 7, 2016 14:28

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

Solice Kirsk posted:

In all my years of being here I don't think I've spent more than 5 or 10 minutes in FYAD. Hell, I posted in LF and YCS and still never really bothered with it.

Check out "Hitler Auditions" and "The Return of the Ultimate Hustler". They were both featured on the front page IIRC.
I'm really not into FYAD, but those are two of my all-time favourite threads.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 14:44

Jastiger: Oct 11, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

Chinese hating post i kept replacing chinese with monkey. Isnt that a copy of that post of the goom who hates monkeys?

# ? Aug 7, 2016 15:28

Groovelord Neato: Dec 6, 2014

fyad mocking tcc owns.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 15:34

Djinn and Tonic: Jan 4, 2009

Reformed junkie goon,

Move to California, New York, or (seriously) Kentucky, in these states it's illegal to report criminal convictions older than 7 years to an employer. Federal law prohibits reporting non-convictions (deferred adjudication, etc) after 7 years. If you think they found out anyway you can sue the gently caress out of them. 26 states have specific laws regarding background checks, look em up. Hope the knowledge gained from my boring job could be of help

# ? Aug 7, 2016 16:48

Bombadilillo: Feb 28, 2009; The dock really fucks a case or nerfing it.

H.H posted:

i want to chime in on the veteran discussion but want to do it anonymously; the reason we give veterans benefits is because most of them are really hosed up in the head and know how to kill people, and the military trains them to snap and... kill people. if we don't pacify the angry hulkmen with discounts and special lines and fake praise then they're just going to start flipping out and killing people. we don't do it because we actually like them we do it because we're scared of them

No its not.

It takes 8 non combat personnel for every one person in the field. Of those a smaller percentage see combat.

You also forget the Navy (minus some seals) Air Force and Coast Guard that all specialize in not man to man mind destroying activities.

There for sure are lots of ptsd damaged guys out there but it's a tiny 1-2% of the veteran population. And giving them a discount at Lowes won't stop them from snapping.

The real reason is its a lovely thing being moved around your whole life and being deployed literally costs you years of your life, you miss kids first steps or their birth, gently caress holidays. You better believe there's a sweet retirement and benefits at the end of that dark tunnel or too few people would do the job.

Be scared of the stolen valor rural militia dipshits who fantasize about a idealized macho military that doesn't actually exists. The kind of open carry as hole who needs a dainty AR to feel safe at starbucks. That's who I'm terrified of.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 17:54

H.H: Oct 24, 2006; August is the Cruelest Month

quote:

My girlfriend and I have a thing for Hitler and the Nazi's, as Nazi's from the 1930's - world war 2 era, not this skinhead bullshit.

We're not racist or think what the Nazi's did was good, we just like the Nazi's. We'll watch any movie with Nazi's in it, inglorious basterds was our favourite. We like their uniforms, guns, tanks, the German language. For a while we thought about getting a tattoo of half a swastika on each of our hands, so that when we held hands it would be a full swastika and it would be our little secret. It was obviously not a good idea so we didn't do it but we had fun talking about it. My girlfriend is half native American BTW.

quote:

I didn't figure out how to masturbate until I was 22.

Obviously, I knew that masturbation existed and it involved rubbing the penis but the mechanics of it never really made sense to me.
I guess it was a combination of a relatively low sex drive for that age and the fact that there was only dial-up internet when I was a teenager and pictures only got me so far in terms of arousal.

True to the goon stereotype, my sexual experience before 22 was very limited. Basically, some basic making out and that's it. I think that's somehow related. Maybe if I had normal sex in my teen years I would have a better understanding of my body and it would have happened sooner.

When I was a teenager I would sometimes look at porn for that initial tingly sensation in my dick but didn't know how to proceed from there.

By the time I was 22 I had a sufficiently fast connection and for some reason decided to give it a try with a video and put some real effort into it.
It worked. The next few years I jerked off as much as a teenager. I had days when I would leave the house and look forward to going back and gratifying myself. After a while my sex drive returned to what I would imagine to be that of a 20 year-old.

Looking back, even I can't understand how I it took me so long. I guess that people like me, at least in western cultures, are pretty rare. The most interesting thing about this, to my mind, is that I wasn't going crazy with pent up sexual frustration. This might explain how people who choose to be celibate pull it off: at least for some, not knowing what you're missing limits your sexual urges to a manageable minimum.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 18:39

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Having been forced into months long droughts of no sexual activity before I wish I could switch my sex drive on and off.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 18:47

Kirk Vikernes: Apr 26, 2004; Count Goatnackh

quote:

we thought about getting a tattoo of half a swastika on each of our hands, so that when we held hands it would be a full swastika and it would be our little secret. It was obviously not a good idea so we didn't do it but we had fun talking about it. My girlfriend is half native American BTW.

Well, at least your girlfriend could just say it's a whirling log. You'd just get your rear end kicked in the wrong company.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 19:42

Ofecks: May 4, 2009; A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.

quote:

This might be late for cousin chat but me and my cousin lost our virginity to each other when I was 15 (she was 14). Her mom/my aunt found the condom wrapper that she saved for some stupid reason and she told her what happened. My aunt got me alone and said she would tell everyone in the family unless I had sex with her too, so I did.

The sex with my aunt was better even though in hindsight it was really gross and highly illegal of her to do to me. So I guess what I'm saying to that guy is skip the cousin and bone your aunt instead.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 20:16

Automatic Slim: Jul 1, 2007

Nazi uniforms were designed by Hugo Boss. I suppose someone could hate the substance but fall for the esthetic.

Automatic Slim fucked around with this message at 02:44 on Aug 8, 2016

# ? Aug 8, 2016 00:35

Mr. 47: Jul 8, 2008; Well, I guess I'll just go fuck myself, then.

Goddammit, goons. Can we have on nice thread without one of you making GBS threads your pants or trying to awkward bone your cousin?

# ? Aug 8, 2016 01:17

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# ? May 10, 2024 07:08

Putty: Mar 21, 2013; HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS

Mr. 47 posted:

Goddammit, goons. Can we have on nice thread without one of you making GBS threads your pants or trying to awkward bone your cousin?

I am going to awkwardly bone you

# ? Aug 8, 2016 02:43

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > "Anonymous Confessions: The legend of pissbitch".

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