Vaping MEGATHREAD - old man yells at icloud - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > Vaping MEGATHREAD - old man yells at icloud

«‹›773 »

maniacdevnull: Apr 18, 2007; FOUR CUBIC FRAMES
DISPROVES SOFT G GOD
YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID

qirex posted:

a post that is bad but on topic is better than 200 pages of lomarf circlejerking

counterpoint: gently caress off dummy

# ? Aug 23, 2016 01:57

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# ? May 25, 2024 02:33

THE BIG DOG DADDY: Oct 16, 2013; Rasheed was, with Aliases, the top 7 PvPers in Bone Krew.

No one talks about this.

Smythe posted:

Apps or tabs are never out of memory when I want to access them on my Nexus 6P. Consider upgrading to the best mobile handset on the market.

lol your phone is gonna be dogshit trash in a month when the new nexii are released

# ? Aug 23, 2016 01:58

maniacdevnull: Apr 18, 2007; FOUR CUBIC FRAMES
DISPROVES SOFT G GOD
YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID

my nexus 5 is still great and i cant wait for 7.0 to make it even better

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:00

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Notorious b.s.d. posted:

i hope the iphone 5 form factor never dies

it's so much lighter and easier to hold than an iphone 6

same

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:19

Satellit3: Oct 21, 2008

qirex posted:

lomarf

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:24

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

YA BOY ETHAN COUCH posted:

lol your phone is gonna be dogshit trash in a month when the new nexii are released

Nah.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:29

Celexi: Nov 25, 2006; Slava Ukraini!

YA BOY ETHAN COUCH posted:

lol your phone is gonna be dogshit trash in a month when the new nexii are released

My nexus 7 from 2013 still runs great and is on the latest android

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:34

Asymmetric POSTer: Aug 17, 2005

theres no such thing as an iphone 5se but the iphone se is the newest and greatest mobile phone ever created

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:37

Juul-Whip: Mar 10, 2008

can confirm it's a great phone

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:38

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

THC posted:

can confirm it's a great phone

It's too small and has bad software. Terrible.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:40

Asymmetric POSTer: Aug 17, 2005

THC posted:

can confirm it's a great phone

i love it so much

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:42

Celexi: Nov 25, 2006; Slava Ukraini!

mishaq posted:

i love it so much

that is hosed up

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:44

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

mishaq posted:

i love it so much

Questionable taste from the Credit Card King. What a shocker!!

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:44

Asymmetric POSTer: Aug 17, 2005

Celexi posted:

that is hosed up

i jack off to my phhone and cum on it :jackbud:

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:45

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

mishaq posted:

i jack off to my phhone and cum on it

I can't cum anymore. My balls got eaten by Mr. T.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:46

Asymmetric POSTer: Aug 17, 2005

Smythe posted:

I can't cum anymore. My balls got eaten by Mr. T.

im sorry to hear that

especially since your epic hugephone has such a large surface area itd be extra easy to catch as much cum as possible on its inviting screen

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:51

EIDE Van Hagar: Dec 8, 2000; Beep Boop

trilljester posted:

Dongles or not, I'm just happy the 7 Plus will have 3G of RAM (2G for the regular 7). I'm sick of my 6 always having to reload tabs in Safari and having background apps quit because 1G RAM is just not enough.

yeah i bought a 6s because the 6 was garbage. now i can skip an upgrade cycle and wait for the 6se with a headphone jack :smug:

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:53

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

mishaq posted:

im sorry to hear that

especially since your epic hugephone has such a large surface area itd be extra easy to catch as much cum as possible on its inviting screen

big screen makes it epic for putting into my viewmaster

# ? Aug 23, 2016 02:53

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

zen death robot posted:

this was confirmed in the app thread where it was dubbed the "subhuman edition"

lol

# ? Aug 23, 2016 03:11

evilcat: May 16, 2009

cremnob posted:

apple doesn't include the pencil or a keyboard with the ipad pro cause they aren't necessary just like wireless headphones aren't necessary, they're just nice to have.

So given that, Apple is going to kill the headphone jack and then follow it up by bundling the non-essential wireless headphones as a separate purchase? Especially since speakerphone lately seems to be gaining popularity.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 03:19

butt dickus: Jul 7, 2007; top ten juiced up coaches
and the top ten juiced up players

Celexi posted:

My nexus 7 from 2013 still runs great and is on the latest android

no it isn't

posted from my pixel c with android 7.0 nougat

# ? Aug 23, 2016 03:56

Celexi: Nov 25, 2006; Slava Ukraini!

butt dickus posted:

no it isn't

posted from my pixel c with android 7.0 nougat

android 7 just got released like today though, but i just checked and it won't be getting the update.

lame

# ? Aug 23, 2016 04:23

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

lmao
is anroid only up to 7

# ? Aug 23, 2016 05:35

atomicthumbs: Dec 26, 2010; We're in the business of extending man's senses.

cremnob posted:

it's going to be great. here's what's going to happen

apple will release the new iphone and then there will be the traditional manufactured outrage on the internet that accompanies every iphone release for a couple of weeks, but no one in the real world will care so apple will still end up selling millions of iphones once again. the only difference is that apple smartly leaked that the headphone jack was being removed almost a year in advance (i think january was the first reports about it) and then again with a controlled leak to the WSJ in the summer which was designed to bait nilay patel and the other apple haters. they obviously took the bait because they can't help themselves and because ultimately everyone was going to have the same take so they had to publish right then and now or miss out on the traffic to competition. everything went according to apple's plan and the first wave of outrage was in the middle of summer when everyone is on vacation, news is slow, and not many people are expecting apple news or are paying attention to news in general. now everyone is used to the idea and has come to accept it as inevitable, the criticism was also blunted by the fact that the other phone manufacturers also read apple rumors and started releasing phones without headphone jacks as well as intel saying usb-c is going to replace them. this made nilay very mad because he would have really liked to have had his take coincide with the high traffic period of an apple launch but also because he had to put this little preamble at the top of his post acknowledging apple wasn't the first to do this before he went into his apple-centric rant

apple was smart to leak it in advance to get the apple haters to blow their wads early, but also because they're introducing this change on a non-traditional "S" release that would normally be a redesign. the 10 year anniversary iphone next year will be the major redesign and by then everyone will have gotten used to the idea of no headphone jack, at a minimum, and no one will be able to bring it up again then. plus this fiscal year all the numbers are perceived to be bad because of tough comps year over year after the iphone 6 pulled forward upgrades and new customers massively, so this year and next year is the perfect time to reset expectations for investors, buyback stock at an insanely cheap discount to fair value, and avoid the entirely predictable narratives from the press that would accompany all their apple news stories. its also perfectly set up to catch all the upgrades from the iphone 6 owners cause most people will replace their phones every 2-3 years

and as for the impact on users themselves, the change will also be great in typical apple fashion. while the retard anroid OEMs aped apple's design choice at a very shallow level without any thought to implementation details, apple doesn't do that and has never. the new way to listen will be via wireless (bluetooth, something properietary, or both) and apple will undoubtedly get all the details right with an extremely polished solution

the only question is whether they'll include lightning headphones in the box or some basic wireless ones with having some better one be a $199 option. lightning in the box makes the most sense cause it wouldnt kill demand for the wireless ones, but that would depend on how much they can differentiate the good ones from the ones that would come in the box for free.

in either case it will be very good and apple will be proven correct immediately but also over the long arc of time, as usual

# ? Aug 23, 2016 09:16

Babies Getting Rabies: Apr 21, 2007; Sugartime Jones

cremnob posted:

it's going to be great. here's what's going to happen

apple will release the new iphone and then there will be the traditional manufactured outrage on the internet that accompanies every iphone release for a couple of weeks, but no one in the real world will care so apple will still end up selling millions of iphones once again. the only difference is that apple smartly leaked that the headphone jack was being removed almost a year in advance (i think january was the first reports about it) and then again with a controlled leak to the WSJ in the summer which was designed to bait nilay patel and the other apple haters. they obviously took the bait because they can't help themselves and because ultimately everyone was going to have the same take so they had to publish right then and now or miss out on the traffic to competition. everything went according to apple's plan and the first wave of outrage was in the middle of summer when everyone is on vacation, news is slow, and not many people are expecting apple news or are paying attention to news in general. now everyone is used to the idea and has come to accept it as inevitable, the criticism was also blunted by the fact that the other phone manufacturers also read apple rumors and started releasing phones without headphone jacks as well as intel saying usb-c is going to replace them. this made nilay very mad because he would have really liked to have had his take coincide with the high traffic period of an apple launch but also because he had to put this little preamble at the top of his post acknowledging apple wasn't the first to do this before he went into his apple-centric rant

apple was smart to leak it in advance to get the apple haters to blow their wads early, but also because they're introducing this change on a non-traditional "S" release that would normally be a redesign. the 10 year anniversary iphone next year will be the major redesign and by then everyone will have gotten used to the idea of no headphone jack, at a minimum, and no one will be able to bring it up again then. plus this fiscal year all the numbers are perceived to be bad because of tough comps year over year after the iphone 6 pulled forward upgrades and new customers massively, so this year and next year is the perfect time to reset expectations for investors, buyback stock at an insanely cheap discount to fair value, and avoid the entirely predictable narratives from the press that would accompany all their apple news stories. its also perfectly set up to catch all the upgrades from the iphone 6 owners cause most people will replace their phones every 2-3 years

and as for the impact on users themselves, the change will also be great in typical apple fashion. while the retard anroid OEMs aped apple's design choice at a very shallow level without any thought to implementation details, apple doesn't do that and has never. the new way to listen will be via wireless (bluetooth, something properietary, or both) and apple will undoubtedly get all the details right with an extremely polished solution

the only question is whether they'll include lightning headphones in the box or some basic wireless ones with having some better one be a $199 option. lightning in the box makes the most sense cause it wouldnt kill demand for the wireless ones, but that would depend on how much they can differentiate the good ones from the ones that would come in the box for free.

in either case it will be very good and apple will be proven correct immediately but also over the long arc of time, as usual

How long will it take for The Verge to like dongle? 2 days
Will dongle be a success? Yes
Total Apple dongle sales: 500 bn USD
Total Samsung dongle phones over the next two years: 3000
Total deaths of people who starved while waiting for the new iPhone 7 Plus Pro: 15 dead
Will this cause waiting Apple users to leave the lines? No
Will dongle come in rosegold? No
Will Apple introduce a dongle to attach two dongles to one dongle?: Yes
Will Apple introduce dongle as "incredible, awesome, amazing"? Yes
Will the media refer to the introduction of dongle as "donglegate"? No
-If yes; will Apple retaliate harshly? Yes
Will Tim sacrifice Jonny (make him introduce dongle/move him to sales)? No
Will LG subsequently introduce a donglephone that supports 8 dongles simultaneously? Yes
Will Google do anything silly like try for modular dongles? Yes
Will a fake dongle cause a series of fires? Yes
How long will the dongle trend persist? ~15 years
Will Steve Jobs rise from the dead to prevent dongle?No
In the long run, will dongle be good or bad for the world? Good

We have to look at what those user casualties are- just because they're likely doesn't make them innocent! Lets take a look at a few possibilities:

1) A civilian walking down the street to market gets killed by a truck while fiddling for dongle.

2) A civilian asleep in their house is killed when their house catches fire due to a fake dongle.

OK, these two are regrettable innocents being killed- but since Apple doesn't make a habit of targetting poors who walk or buy fake accessories, they're very small in number!

3) An Android user working at a hackerspace gets electrocuted when he plugs a dongle into an electrical outlet.

4) A Chinese preparing a shipment of fake dongles sold on Aliexpress is killed when the shipment explodes.

5) A non-certified tech repairing an iPhone 7 Pro Plus is killed when a dongle shorts.

6) A YouTuber bleeds to death from a paper cut while unboxing dongle.

7) A techbro chokes to death on a dongle that fell into his Soylent without him noticing.

etc, etc. The list goes on. My point is that there are a lot of dipshit poors and idiots supporting non-Apple approved solutions that aren't exactly "innocent" and whose death would rightly please Apple. I'm an Apple user who jailbroke his iPhone and work for a ridesharing but for goldfishes startup, but I acknowledge I'm also a tremendous idiot hellfucker because of what I do. And I think the vast majority of user casualties will not be innocent.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 13:51

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

Ghost Farts posted:

How long will it take for The Verge to like dongle? 2 days
Will dongle be a success? Yes
Total Apple dongle sales: 500 bn USD
Total Samsung dongle phones over the next two years: 3000
Total deaths of people who starved while waiting for the new iPhone 7 Plus Pro: 15 dead
Will this cause waiting Apple users to leave the lines? No
Will dongle come in rosegold? No
Will Apple introduce a dongle to attach two dongles to one dongle?: Yes
Will Apple introduce dongle as "incredible, awesome, amazing"? Yes
Will the media refer to the introduction of dongle as "donglegate"? No
-If yes; will Apple retaliate harshly? Yes
Will Tim sacrifice Jonny (make him introduce dongle/move him to sales)? No
Will LG subsequently introduce a donglephone that supports 8 dongles simultaneously? Yes
Will Google do anything silly like try for modular dongles? Yes
Will a fake dongle cause a series of fires? Yes
How long will the dongle trend persist? ~15 years
Will Steve Jobs rise from the dead to prevent dongle?No
In the long run, will dongle be good or bad for the world? Good

We have to look at what those user casualties are- just because they're likely doesn't make them innocent! Lets take a look at a few possibilities:

1) A civilian walking down the street to market gets killed by a truck while fiddling for dongle.

2) A civilian asleep in their house is killed when their house catches fire due to a fake dongle.

OK, these two are regrettable innocents being killed- but since Apple doesn't make a habit of targetting poors who walk or buy fake accessories, they're very small in number!

3) An Android user working at a hackerspace gets electrocuted when he plugs a dongle into an electrical outlet.

4) A Chinese preparing a shipment of fake dongles sold on Aliexpress is killed when the shipment explodes.

5) A non-certified tech repairing an iPhone 7 Pro Plus is killed when a dongle shorts.

6) A YouTuber bleeds to death from a paper cut while unboxing dongle.

7) A techbro chokes to death on a dongle that fell into his Soylent without him noticing.

etc, etc. The list goes on. My point is that there are a lot of dipshit poors and idiots supporting non-Apple approved solutions that aren't exactly "innocent" and whose death would rightly please Apple. I'm an Apple user who jailbroke his iPhone and work for a ridesharing but for goldfishes startup, but I acknowledge I'm also a tremendous idiot hellfucker because of what I do. And I think the vast majority of user casualties will not be innocent.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 13:56

GameCube: Nov 21, 2006

i'm not familiar with that meme

# ? Aug 23, 2016 13:59

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

GameCube posted:

i'm not familiar with that meme

GIP moderator and house destroyer Grover on invading Iraq

# ? Aug 23, 2016 14:01

cremnob: Jun 30, 2010

Ghost Farts posted:

How long will it take for The Verge to like dongle? 2 days
Will dongle be a success? Yes
Total Apple dongle sales: 500 bn USD
Total Samsung dongle phones over the next two years: 3000
Total deaths of people who starved while waiting for the new iPhone 7 Plus Pro: 15 dead
Will this cause waiting Apple users to leave the lines? No
Will dongle come in rosegold? No
Will Apple introduce a dongle to attach two dongles to one dongle?: Yes
Will Apple introduce dongle as "incredible, awesome, amazing"? Yes
Will the media refer to the introduction of dongle as "donglegate"? No
-If yes; will Apple retaliate harshly? Yes
Will Tim sacrifice Jonny (make him introduce dongle/move him to sales)? No
Will LG subsequently introduce a donglephone that supports 8 dongles simultaneously? Yes
Will Google do anything silly like try for modular dongles? Yes
Will a fake dongle cause a series of fires? Yes
How long will the dongle trend persist? ~15 years
Will Steve Jobs rise from the dead to prevent dongle?No
In the long run, will dongle be good or bad for the world? Good

We have to look at what those user casualties are- just because they're likely doesn't make them innocent! Lets take a look at a few possibilities:

1) A civilian walking down the street to market gets killed by a truck while fiddling for dongle.

2) A civilian asleep in their house is killed when their house catches fire due to a fake dongle.

OK, these two are regrettable innocents being killed- but since Apple doesn't make a habit of targetting poors who walk or buy fake accessories, they're very small in number!

3) An Android user working at a hackerspace gets electrocuted when he plugs a dongle into an electrical outlet.

4) A Chinese preparing a shipment of fake dongles sold on Aliexpress is killed when the shipment explodes.

5) A non-certified tech repairing an iPhone 7 Pro Plus is killed when a dongle shorts.

6) A YouTuber bleeds to death from a paper cut while unboxing dongle.

7) A techbro chokes to death on a dongle that fell into his Soylent without him noticing.

etc, etc. The list goes on. My point is that there are a lot of dipshit poors and idiots supporting non-Apple approved solutions that aren't exactly "innocent" and whose death would rightly please Apple. I'm an Apple user who jailbroke his iPhone and work for a ridesharing but for goldfishes startup, but I acknowledge I'm also a tremendous idiot hellfucker because of what I do. And I think the vast majority of user casualties will not be innocent.

apple can't worry too much about the 2nd or 3rd order effects of any decisions they make or they'd be held back to the level of mediocrity of android

# ? Aug 23, 2016 14:02

flakeloaf: Feb 26, 2003; Still better than android clock

Citizen Tayne posted:

GIP moderator and house destroyer Grover on invading Iraq

a useless thing cobbled together from useful parts
needs an outlet every ten feet
may burst into flames at any moment

it all makes sense now

# ? Aug 23, 2016 14:06

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

flakeloaf posted:

a useless thing cobbled together from useful parts
needs an outlet every ten feet
may burst into flames at any moment

it all makes sense now

Someone on an offsite sleuthed up Grover's address and checked it on the local real estate assessment site. There was a bump in value after he reported the work done, and then it lost a shitload of value once someone went out to assess it.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 14:11

ArmedZombie: Jun 6, 2004

Ghost Farts posted:

How long will it take for The Verge to like dongle? 2 days
Will dongle be a success? Yes
Total Apple dongle sales: 500 bn USD
Total Samsung dongle phones over the next two years: 3000
Total deaths of people who starved while waiting for the new iPhone 7 Plus Pro: 15 dead
Will this cause waiting Apple users to leave the lines? No
Will dongle come in rosegold? No
Will Apple introduce a dongle to attach two dongles to one dongle?: Yes
Will Apple introduce dongle as "incredible, awesome, amazing"? Yes
Will the media refer to the introduction of dongle as "donglegate"? No
-If yes; will Apple retaliate harshly? Yes
Will Tim sacrifice Jonny (make him introduce dongle/move him to sales)? No
Will LG subsequently introduce a donglephone that supports 8 dongles simultaneously? Yes
Will Google do anything silly like try for modular dongles? Yes
Will a fake dongle cause a series of fires? Yes
How long will the dongle trend persist? ~15 years
Will Steve Jobs rise from the dead to prevent dongle?No
In the long run, will dongle be good or bad for the world? Good

We have to look at what those user casualties are- just because they're likely doesn't make them innocent! Lets take a look at a few possibilities:

1) A civilian walking down the street to market gets killed by a truck while fiddling for dongle.

2) A civilian asleep in their house is killed when their house catches fire due to a fake dongle.

OK, these two are regrettable innocents being killed- but since Apple doesn't make a habit of targetting poors who walk or buy fake accessories, they're very small in number!

3) An Android user working at a hackerspace gets electrocuted when he plugs a dongle into an electrical outlet.

4) A Chinese preparing a shipment of fake dongles sold on Aliexpress is killed when the shipment explodes.

5) A non-certified tech repairing an iPhone 7 Pro Plus is killed when a dongle shorts.

6) A YouTuber bleeds to death from a paper cut while unboxing dongle.

7) A techbro chokes to death on a dongle that fell into his Soylent without him noticing.

etc, etc. The list goes on. My point is that there are a lot of dipshit poors and idiots supporting non-Apple approved solutions that aren't exactly "innocent" and whose death would rightly please Apple. I'm an Apple user who jailbroke his iPhone and work for a ridesharing but for goldfishes startup, but I acknowledge I'm also a tremendous idiot hellfucker because of what I do. And I think the vast majority of user casualties will not be innocent.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 14:25

ArmedZombie: Jun 6, 2004

cremnob posted:

apple can't worry too much about the 2nd or 3rd order effects of any decisions they make or they'd be held back to the level of mediocrity of android

# ? Aug 23, 2016 14:25

Polo-Rican: Jul 4, 2004; emptyquote my posts or die

actully starting to feel bad for steve jobs's ghost

macrumors posted:

Apple is planning to release at least three new iPhones next year, including a high-end model with a 5.5-inch-or-larger OLED display that is curved on both sides like Samsung's Galaxy S7 edge, according to Nikkei.

http://www.macrumors.com/2016/08/22/2017-iphone-dual-curve-premium-model/

# ? Aug 23, 2016 15:14

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

Polo-Rican posted:

actully starting to feel bad for steve jobs's ghost

http://www.macrumors.com/2016/08/22/2017-iphone-dual-curve-premium-model/

Timb? More like Tomb Cook, because he's killing Apple.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 15:17

THE BIG DOG DADDY: Oct 16, 2013; Rasheed was, with Aliases, the top 7 PvPers in Bone Krew.

No one talks about this.

I also heard they're gonna make one with see through glass and it'll be 4mm thick and be able to run multiple OS'

# ? Aug 23, 2016 15:18

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

Polo-Rican posted:

actully starting to feel bad for steve jobs's ghost

http://www.macrumors.com/2016/08/22/2017-iphone-dual-curve-premium-model/

apple is releasing 3 new phones?! lets randomly speculate instead of thinking it might be:
iphone 7se
iphone 7
iphone 7plus

# ? Aug 23, 2016 15:19

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

I am happy with my iPhone and I am okay with using that form factor with spec refreshes for the next decade or whatever.

# ? Aug 23, 2016 15:19

GameCube: Nov 21, 2006

YA BOY ETHAN COUCH posted:

I also heard they're gonna make one with see through glass and it'll be 4mm thick and be able to run multiple OS'

lol. i hear they're going to make a computer watch

# ? Aug 23, 2016 16:05

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# ? May 25, 2024 02:33

THE BIG DOG DADDY: Oct 16, 2013; Rasheed was, with Aliases, the top 7 PvPers in Bone Krew.

No one talks about this.

yeah the iPhone 6 4.7" is the perfect screen size for a phone. I will probably get another similarly sized phone unless the plus pro has much better furnishings

# ? Aug 23, 2016 16:37

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > Vaping MEGATHREAD - old man yells at icloud

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