loquacius posted:

I have the worst eating habits of anyone I know,

Zorodius posted:

being able to see your own dick is a terrific feeling

BeOSPOS posted:

The fat goon's confession would have been funnier if he said he was north of 420lbs and made $69k/year

Sir_Charles posted:

Why don't fat people eat food that actually tastes good. Nothing but fast food, Chili's and Applebee's? If your going to eat yourself into an early grave at least mix it up a little bit.

quote:

I enjoy reading the LadyChat thread in CCC and I really wish I could post there and compliment the nice goonettes. But I'm a straight man so that's probably not a good idea.

quote:

I want a paper marriage with my husband. I cheated two years ago, was caught, but he decided to stick through it. He has a habit of being very emotionally distant, I have a habit of finding what I need elsewhere. He is starting to repeat his behavior of wanting a non emotional companion and overtly avoiding engaging in meaningful discussions about where the relationship is going or if we even have a future. When I bring up the subject of divorce, he seems shocked and gets very defensive that I were to suggest it. Its just one day at a time, and I feel like there's a lot of elephants in the room that need to be addressed. I don't currently feel any security about my relationship with him, and he controls all the finances, including my paychecks. I do truly love and enjoy his company, I am happy to be his wife, to keep up the social media presence of a happy couple on FB, go to social events for his work, attend family trips, etc. When I am with him, my full time and love would be directed towards him, but when we are not together, he should respect my space and stop monitoring my phone. If he doesn't want to fulfill my emotional and sexual needs, but does not want a divorce, I should be able to have the ability to find it elsewhere. I am also willing to keep sleeping with him whenever he wants it, but I want one week off a year. To go do whatever, or whoever, I want. I would not sleep around outside of this window. The same rules would apply to him as well. We spend pretty much all our time together outside of work, and I'm generally not allowed to hang out with friends without him, and definitely not allowed to go away overnight. I just want some down time, I think it's healthy to not be with one's partner virtually 24/7. To show I am committed to the marriage, I am willing to go to a lawyer and write up terms, including a prenuptial agreement should we divorce. I don't want him to think I'm in this for the long con, he has expressed concern that after being married for a certain number of years, he owes alimony by default. I don't want money to be a point of contention. However, I'm not quite sure how that works after one is already married. I know this probably sounds completely unreasonable, and I would have no idea how to start the conversation with him. He had a fear of losing me because it's really difficult to meet other women, especially post college, in a male dominated field. We've been together for six years so there is the familiarity aspect as well. I have not cheated since the incident two years ago, but as his behavior continues down the same path as last time, I am seeing the red flags that lead to my indiscretion and I would rather truth and transparency than behind his back bull poo poo if he wishes to remain in a relationship with me.

quote:

I know this (https://i.imgur.com/d0LEBjP.gif) was posted as a joke in the sexual awakening thread but it made me hard and now I'm contemplating finding a cute feminine featured guy to play with just to see what it's like. I'm 28 and i have a wife.

Murphy Brownback posted:

Second confessor: have you ever heard of loving paragraphs

Panfilo posted:

Person with emotionally distant husband should get her financial poo poo together, insist on managing finances as a couple and be more assertive with what she wants. If he's not willing to divorce, what exactly is he going to do about it then?

Docahedron posted:

He sounds like a controlling rear end in a top hat, monitoring her phone, not letting her go out with friends, etc. I don't think "being more assertive" would help her in any way and may instead get her physically abused.

But yeah, get a no-fault divorce and get out of there. Big mistake in getting married.

Scyantific posted:

I get really salty about that poo poo because my only long-term gf cheated on me and had the audacity to try and pin it on me for "reasons."

No bitch, you cheated because you were a big idiot.

H.H posted:

I know this (https://i.imgur.com/d0LEBjP.gif) was posted as a joke in the sexual awakening thread but it made me hard and now I'm contemplating finding a cute feminine featured guy to play with just to see what it's like. I'm 28 and i have a wife.

Shakill OReal posted:

The only thing cheating is good for is gettin' high scores

loquacius posted:

I'd 100% believe the above if it weren't for the first paragraph making it sound like forum drama

quote:

My job pays really well (about 65k a year)

Big Swifty posted:

loquacius posted:

(I say that but really I think they absolutely need to divorce. He probably knows it's over deep down but is in denial because changing things would take effort and he sounds lazy as hell.)

H.H posted:

I have not cheated since the incident two years ago, but as his behavior continues down the same path as last time, I am seeing the red flags that lead to my indiscretion

H.H posted:

I know this (https://i.imgur.com/d0LEBjP.gif) was posted as a joke in the sexual awakening thread but it made me hard and now I'm contemplating finding a cute feminine featured guy to play with just to see what it's like. I'm 28 and i have a wife.

quote:

I have a strong compulsion to watch porn and masturbate, but can't because it gives me ED during actual sex. My girlfriend feels insecure if I don't cum or I lose my erection, so I've given up both my habits for her sake. She's asked about the kinds of porn I like, and I rattled off some tame stuff like amateur couples and roleplay. That was, of course, lying by omission, as my actual preferences also include anime girls with dicks for nipples and smoking hot masked women letting their dogs gently caress them on camera.

Anyway we have normal sex now although I'm lucky if I get some action more than once a week, as she's always exhausted after work and I feel bad about pushing her for more sex. She apologizes for her tiredness and I pretend it's all fine, when secretly I long for the days when we'd gently caress like rabbits or at least I could indulge my degenerate masturbatory fantasies without feeling bad about it. I just wish I could have the best of both worlds and jerk off to all the gloryhole cuck porn I want and have a functioning dick afterwards.

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I am the other woman. To a lot of women, actually.

It's weird. Being a slut means you either get super picky, or you gently caress a LOT of guys in relationships. I'm not hot enough to get super picky. I gave up my ethics instead. I'll probably change my ways when I get old and bored and/or find someone who likes my slutty rear end enough to settle down with me who isn't terrible.

But right now, I'm loving a lot of ladies' dudes. Some of them have been married for about as long as I've been alive. Some of them just have girlfriends. Some of them claim their ladies know, and maybe some of those ladies do, and maaaaaybe some of them didn't get bullied into the open relationship deal!

Statistically, though, I'm screwing over a lot of ladies. (No pun intended.)

This is a pretty mediocre confession, but I guess the biggest secret - to me - is that I don't even feel bad.

quote:

I'm a well adjusted young adult, I come from a happy home and have been working in a diverse company for years now since graduating college, pretty normal except for my secret shame - I still laugh when I see a midget. If I'm in public and I see a midget walking around doing normal things like shopping for groceries, I have to bite the inside of my cheek so hard that I draw blood to stop myself from laughing out loud.

I think a lot of it is that I know how inappropriate it would be for a grown man to laugh at the sight of a little person, and that thought makes it even funnier. I can keep it under control 99% of the time except for once. A few years ago I walked into a liquor store one friday evening and when I went around the corner I saw the smallest person I've ever seen in my life, she couldn't have been more than three feet tall and dressed in black leather and fishnets, and she was struggling to carry the biggest bottle of vodka she could. She had both arms wrapped around this bottle the way that a child would hold a stuffed bear. I couldn't hold it back, I started laughing so hard I was wheezing, it was just out of control. She was giving me a death glare. I hightailed myself out of that store and drove off, laughing and choking on my own breath and I've never been back since.

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My wife woke me up one morning a few years ago and just stared at me for thirty seconds before saying, "I'm pregnant." I couldn't believe it. It felt unreal but I was overjoyed and she was as well. We were so excited when we found out it was a girl, when we picked out clothes, when she decorated her nursery, and everything. It was so perfect.

The first year of her life was the worst of mine. I loved her desperately but I felt like there was no connection between us. Like she was someone else's child. I was depressed constantly. I considered killing myself every day. I felt guiltier because I knew she deserved a better dad than me. If I was alone, I would just climb into bed and stare at the ceiling. I believe the only thing that kept me alive was the knowledge that if I killed myself, she would never know me. Thinking about that always made me cry but convinced me to keep going. I've been on antidepressants for years and should have told my psychiatrist but she's very condescending and almost definitely would have written it off as me being whiny and then convinced me that I was being weak. She's very manipulative.

She's done that in the past. I actually attempted suicide the day after an appointment with her when I was younger after being told "You always do this. It's like you don't get that medicine doesn't just fix you." when I told her I had been depressed for months. I know I should have switched to a less insane doctor but I only see her once a year and get a years worth of prescriptions so I always put it off until it seemed like it didn't matter. I put off a lot of things I know I need like therapy or going to the gym.

I feel like I lost the first year of my daughter's life. I'd say I finally began to form a bond with her and break out of the depression around her first birthday. Don't misunderstand, I was a good dad. I played the role and possibly even overdid it. NO DON'T WORRY HONEY YOU SLEEP, I'LL GET HER UP BECAUSE I LOVE HER AND DEFINITELY DON'T THINK ABOUT SLITTING MY WRISTS WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT HER. Keep in mind, I realized all of this in hindsight. At the time, I was convinced I was such a terrible dad that the government should have taken her from us even though I didn't do anything wrong.

I guess the term is paternal post partum depression? I dunno. All I know is that I'm having a vasectomy done to prevent that from ever happening again.

Oh, and my wife was and is a wonderful mother who supported me through all of this and tried to convince me to seek therapy and switch psychiatrists.

H.H posted:

H.H posted:

Depressed dad.