Post Funny Panels: Maximum Bogosity

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Post Funny Panels: Maximum Bogosity

Air Skwirl: May 13, 2007; Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Kwyndig posted:

Read it horizontally, not vertically. Also of course it was Ant Man

if the panels are
123
456

the reading order that makes the most sense to me is 134256

Edit: I missed the phrase "three hits" in the first panel, makes more sense now.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 21:05

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# ? May 9, 2024 06:41

Elfface: Nov 14, 2010; Da-na-na-na-na-na-na
IRON JONAH

Not only is Spidey hilariously incompetent, so is Ant Man. Punch someone four times before actually seeing who they are.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 21:39

ImpAtom: May 24, 2007

Elfface posted:

Not only is Spidey hilariously incompetent, so is Ant Man. Punch someone four times before actually seeing who they are.

Hank Pym is well known for punching people without forethought or care.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 21:44

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

ImpAtom posted:

Hank Pym is well known for punching people without forethought or care.

Especially if they're married to him.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 21:49

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

ONE TIME

# ? Aug 28, 2016 21:52

Lobok: Jul 13, 2006; Say Watt?

"Your honor, it was dark and I thought she was Spider-Man!"

# ? Aug 28, 2016 22:01

graham cracker: Mar 8, 2004; "There is no God! Right, Mama?"

"True."

Elfface posted:

Not only is Spidey hilariously incompetent, so is Ant Man. Punch someone four times before actually seeing who they are.

I'm going to imagine the core plot of Civil War was that everyone involved simply wasn't paying attention to who they were punching.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 22:22

Air Skwirl: May 13, 2007; Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Marky Marx posted:

I'm going to imagine the core plot of Civil War was that everyone involved simply wasn't paying attention to who they were punching.

If you're talking about the movie, you aren't far off.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 22:26

Rhyno: Mar 22, 2003; Can't post for 10 years!

Lobok posted:

"Your honor, it was dark and I thought she was Spider-Man!"

If this was the actual reason it would instantly redeem that story.

# ? Aug 28, 2016 22:55

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

Lobok posted:

"Your honor, it was dark and I thought she was Spider-Man!"

Judge J. Jonah Jameson: CLEARED ON ALL COUNTS..... _{_{did you get any pictures?}}

# ? Aug 28, 2016 23:19

Section Z: Oct 1, 2008; Wait, this is the Moon.
How did I even get here?; Pillbug

Jerusalem posted:

Judge J. Jonah Jameson: CLEARED ON ALL COUNTS..... _{_{did you get any pictures?}}

"But... But it turned out it wasn't Spider-Man. How can I get pictures of Spider-Man if-"
"Sounds like SOMEONE isn't trying hard enough!"

# ? Aug 29, 2016 00:12

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

Section Z posted:

"But... But it turned out it wasn't Spider-Man.

DAILY BUGLE EXCLUSIVE: HANK PYM ABLE TO BEAT WIFE DUE TO ABSENT SPIDER-MAN
And we have the pictures that prove he wasn't there!

# ? Aug 29, 2016 00:48

Ghostlight: Sep 25, 2009; maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me

Elfface posted:

Not only is Spidey hilariously incompetent, so is Ant Man. Punch someone four times before actually seeing who they are.

At precisely five second intervals.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 01:07

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

From the YEEECH panel 5 it sounds like Spidey gooped him right in the mouth

# ? Aug 29, 2016 01:11

Opopanax: Aug 8, 2007; I HEX YE!!!

SynthOrange posted:

From the YEEECH panel 5 it sounds like Spidey gooped him right in the mouth

Spidey's polite, he always warns first

# ? Aug 29, 2016 01:19

Ensign_Ricky: Jan 4, 2008; Daddy Warlord
of the
Children of the Corn

_{or something...}

Lobok posted:

"Your honor, it was dark and I thought she was Spider-Man!"

Post/Av combo of the week right there.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 02:11

dordreff: Jul 16, 2013

Elfface posted:

Not only is Spidey hilariously incompetent, so is Ant Man. Punch someone four times before actually seeing who they are.

He knew from the start who it was but if you get the chance to punch Newspaper Spider-Man, you take it.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 02:29

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

dordreff posted:

He knew from the start who it was but if you get the chance to punch Newspaper Spider-Man, you take it.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 02:34

Babe Magnet: Jun 2, 2008

maybe spidey should stop sneaking into other people's houses

# ? Aug 29, 2016 02:42

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

Babe Magnet posted:

maybe spidey should stop sneaking into other people's houses

Actually Spider-Men in your house is good because they'll keep the place clear of annoying pests that would otherwise overrun the place :eng101:

# ? Aug 29, 2016 03:05

Gnome de plume: Sep 5, 2006; Hell.
Fucking.
Yes.

A guy in a Spider-Man outfit enters the building through the roof and people are only willing to 50/50 on him actually being Spider-Man.

Or they do know it's him and this his how they greet him every time he comes to visit.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 03:13

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

Tangentially related, one of my favorite running gags will always be that Spider-Man is broke:

Not entirely sure on the source sorry beyond being from a couple of the different Avengers relaunches from the last few years. Also searching for this brought me the following panel from this free comic book about banking

# ? Aug 29, 2016 03:27

Babe Magnet: Jun 2, 2008

Gnome de plume posted:

Or they do know it's him and this his how they greet him every time he comes to visit.

they wouldn't have hit him if it was just a regular guy in a spiderman outfit

# ? Aug 29, 2016 04:05

Choco1980: Feb 22, 2013; I fell in love with a Video Nasty

The very first appearance of Spidey he was trying to get the FF to let him join because he thought they made good salaries in the Superhero biz. So being broke is kinda one of Pete's defining characteristics...

# ? Aug 29, 2016 04:49

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

I know, it's been a running theme from the early days (I still remember an issue where he gets a big bonus check from the Bugle, then runs into his landlady who basically takes the entire thing away from him because he was behind on his rent, leaving him penniless again :allears:

) and I love it's never really changed.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 04:53

bunnyofdoom: Mar 29, 2008; I've been here the whole time, and you're not my real Dad!

Gnome de plume posted:

A guy in a Spider-Man outfit enters the building through the roof and people are only willing to 50/50 on him actually being Spider-Man.

Or they do know it's him and this his how they greet him every time he comes to visit.

Look at the Avenger's panel. It's the same setup down to the dark room. Only this time it's Iron Man punchign him. Or was it Iron Jonah?

# ? Aug 29, 2016 05:17

Ygolonac

Nov 26, 2007

pre:

*************
CLUTCH  NIXON
*************

The Hero We Need

bunnyofdoom posted:

Look at the Avenger's panel. It's the same setup down to the dark room. Only this time it's Iron Man punchign him. Or was it Iron Jonah?

Look closer - Pym is punching, everyone else is pimp-slapping.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 05:49

SonicRulez: Aug 6, 2013; GOTTA GO FIST

Maybe Spidey should stop breaking into every building he enters. There's less punches at the door.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 06:21

bunnyofdoom: Mar 29, 2008; I've been here the whole time, and you're not my real Dad!

Ygolonac posted:

Look closer - Pym is punching, everyone else is pimp-slapping.

And once again pym is the gently caress up of the avengers. He can't even pimp slap spidey right.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 06:44

prefect: Sep 11, 2001; No one, Woodhouse.
No one.; Dead Man’s Band

Choco1980 posted:

The very first appearance of Spidey he was trying to get the FF to let him join because he thought they made good salaries in the Superhero biz. So being broke is kinda one of Pete's defining characteristics...

Also, he broke into their house and a fight broke out, so it's even more on-topic. :buddy:

# ? Aug 29, 2016 10:38

Captain Bravo: Feb 16, 2011; An Emergency Shitpost
has been deployed...

...but experts warn it is
just a drop in the ocean.

SonicRulez posted:

There's less punches at the door.

Look, that's an interesting theory, but in lieu of compelling evidence we're just going to have to assume that won't be the case.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 12:50

Chinaman7000: Nov 28, 2003

Everyone in the marvel newspaper universe hangs out in the dark ready to slap or punch intruders.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 14:19

Keromaru5: Dec 28, 2012; Pictured: The Wolf Of Gubbio (probably)

This avatar made possible by a gift from the Religionthread Posters Relief Fund

Geez, the Marvel heroes go about this all wrong. You step on spiders, not slap or punch them!

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:35

davidspackage: May 16, 2007; Nap Ghost

Jerusalem posted:

Actually Spider-Men in your house is good because they'll keep the place clear of annoying pests that would otherwise overrun the place

Every year, you swallow 6 or 7 Spider-Men in your sleep.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:17

Johnny Aztec: Jan 30, 2005; by Hand Knit

SonicRulez posted:

Maybe Spidey should stop breaking into every building he enters. There's less punches at the door.

Everyone knows that Spiderman has sticky fingers.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:26

SilverSupernova: Feb 1, 2013

Ghostlight posted:

You forget

I HAVE TO HELP BUT NEED COSTUME
I GET ANGEL COSTUME FROM COSTUME STORE
I HELP AND GET A REWARD
I RETURN COSTUME TO COSTUME STORE AND USE REWARD TO BUY SPIDER-MAN COSTUME

Was this before or after he had to get a note from Barak Obama in order to use a plane as Spider-Man without having to show ID?

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:18

Rhyno: Mar 22, 2003; Can't post for 10 years!

davidspackage posted:

Every year, you swallow 6 or 7 Spider-Men in your sleep.

Mary Jane never seemed to complain.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:53

Super Dan: Jan 26, 2006

Rhyno posted:

Mary Jane never seemed to complain.

Until the radioactivity gave her cancer.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:05

bunnyofdoom: Mar 29, 2008; I've been here the whole time, and you're not my real Dad!

Super Dan posted:

Until the radioactivity gave her cancer.

God, I forgot about the amazing radioactive spider semen.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:06

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# ? May 9, 2024 06:41

purple death ray: Jul 28, 2007; me omw 2 steal ur girl

It's cool how radiation, when administered via spider venom, gives you superpowers, yet the same radiation administered via jizz will kill you. Lowkey slut shaming from Marvel Comics.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:42

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