Bad w/ Money: I just paid for a fat bitches Electric Cock Zapping Sex Toy in Kentucky

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Bad w/ Money: I just paid for a fat bitches Electric Cock Zapping Sex Toy in Kentucky

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Subjunctive: Sep 12, 2006; ✨sparkle and shine✨

I eat horse every couple of months in Canada, and it's apparently raised for that purpose. It's great. I also have a piece of horse bavette in my freezer right now, waiting for the loving touch of a water bath. It will also be great.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:35

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 22:18

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

It may be hard to slaughter horses economically, but that doesn't seem like a very good reason to ban the practice outright.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:39

Moneyball: Jul 11, 2005; It's a problem you think we need to explain ourselves.

NancyPants posted:

Yeah, China has a really good recent history of food safety.

I preferred to just eat and not ask questions. I'll be going back in December with my significant other- hopefully I don't eat anything too strange this time.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:47

JohnGalt: Aug 7, 2012

Horse sushi is delicious. Refusing to eat it is BWL

NancyPants posted:

Horses are a terrible option as food animals. They are stupid and fragile. We've bred bovine for generations for yield, hardiness, and dumb complacency but they are still difficult to keep and slaughter efficiently and humanely. Eating horse is like watching your dog eat cat poo poo and thinking, "yeah I'd totally eat that animal, no prob."

You can't keep food horses in any fashion which is profitable because they need too much room; you have to plan their pasture away from ants so they don't die (protip: don't eat things that died prior to slaughter), they need pasture because they can't just be kept in stalls or they'll die, and if you let them out on the pasture they'll break their legs and die. Forget humane slaughter for a second, it is impossible to efficientlyslaughter them. They die in transport because they are dumb as bricks and made of glass. Your slaughterhouse stun guy can't stun them prior to slaughter and can't kill the thing without multiple blows; even if you don't care about torturing an animal to death, this poo poo takes a lot of time and effort. In the real world this means a live animal gets butchered. A live animal kicks people, or gets its guts perforated when you try to butcher it because it isn't still, and then before you know it you've got horse poo poo all over your horse steak.

It's not like you can just take a racing horse and turn it into steak at the end of its useful life. There's no profit in that enterprise on the large scale, first of all. Second, that animal is not fit for human consumption. Food animals are tracked from birth to slaughter, their feed and medications are regulated. Sport animals are kept by people who have hair braiding and jumping over sticks as hobbies. Bribes and falsification of records still exist when it comes to domesticated animals we've bred for food, and these are animals which are ostensibly hardy and designed for this process. There is as little incentive as we can get to butcher downed or sick animals and it still happens, so what do you think will happen with these gigantic idiots that have a stroke if they see the wrong shaped cloud?

What we have going now is great, though, because any presence of horse in the meat tells us a processor has hosed up. If horse is legal, it suddenly becomes nearly impossible to shut anyone down. Oh no, that wasn't a racing horse. That was totally one of these big, dumb, might-as-well-be-bovine food horses. Honest.

The horse is a creature which is unfit for consumption. I know some other countries eat them. Some other countries believe in things like fan death and not going to the dentist.

No one is going to make race horse steaks. The meat quality would be noticeably awful. That poo poo is destined for ground meat.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:49

TLG James: Jun 5, 2000; Questing ain't easy

Did everyone skip the part where you have to get your stupid horse drug tested? Don't want no roided up horse doing horse dancing.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:58

Nocheez: Sep 5, 2000; Can you spare a little cheddar?; Nap Ghost

NancyPants posted:

A live animal kicks people, or gets its guts perforated when you try to butcher it because it isn't still, and then before you know it you've got horse poo poo all over your horse steak.

Yuck. It's junk like this going on in the meat industry that keeps me a vegetarian.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:00

Barry: Aug 1, 2003; Hardened Criminal

Nocheez posted:

Yuck. It's junk like this going on in the meat industry that keeps me a vegetarian.

I'm a big believer in "what you don't know can't hurt you" and "that which does not kill you only makes you stronger" so bring on the horseshitsteaks, I'm game

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:05

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

Organic farming fertilizes with cow poo poo I don't see how this is any different :colbert:

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:07

Trillian: Sep 14, 2003

Subjunctive posted:

I eat horse every couple of months in Canada, and it's apparently raised for that purpose. It's great. I also have a piece of horse bavette in my freezer right now, waiting for the loving touch of a water bath. It will also be great.

Usually it is not raised for the purpose, it's tasty racehorse. Canada does fairly brisk business in horse slaughter because unwanted horses can be imported from the US. It's mostly exported, though, and only really commonly seen in Quebec.

I went looking for a source to back me up and learned of a whole new dimension of horse BWM-ness:

"The Globe and Mail posted:

The Japanese, who are perhaps the world's pickiest eaters - this is a country where a fish can sell for more than a Porsche - import horses live. Every week, about 100 are loaded onto a plane at Calgary International Airport. By the time their meat is butchered, sliced and served in Japanese restaurants, each Canadian horse is worth almost $20,000, according to the 2008 Alberta Horse Welfare Report.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:15

Zo: Feb 22, 2005; LIKE A FOX

wow yea rich people spending money on expensive food real exciting BWM dimension you found there

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:21

Trillian: Sep 14, 2003

Zo posted:

wow yea rich people spending money on expensive food real exciting BWM dimension you found there

Okay here is an article that addresses whether you can humanely slaughter unwanted horses. Also it has some other stuff in it.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:22

Moneyball: Jul 11, 2005; It's a problem you think we need to explain ourselves.

Well I think we learned in this thread that if a horse dies on a trail, they blow it up with dynamite, which I'd say is worth the :10bux:

I paid

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:36

BonerGhost: Mar 9, 2007

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

It may be hard to slaughter horses economically, but that doesn't seem like a very good reason to ban the practice outright.

You're right, but the inherent economic disadvantages of food-safe (and humane) horse slaughter are a huge incentive to not do it safely. With no established way to ensure the safety of horse meat in a country with a sport horse population of 9.5 million (the largest in the world), an outright ban is a great way to keep that poo poo out of our food supply. US horsemeat is not fit for human consumption. Statistically horse sashimi is very likely to be Seabiscuit's retarded brother. Canada imports over half its meat horses from the US (where we raise no horses for food), slaughters it, then exports the meat worldwide.

I have no philosophical problems with the eating of specific animals. I do have welfare concerns for intelligent animals. The horse is a garbage animal and anyone raising one for food would be a moron, which is why no one raises them for food.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:56

Osama Dozen-Dongs: Nov 29, 2014

NancyPants posted:

If there are European countries outside UK that can manage it from a food safety perspective

Dunno about your exacting standards (or actually where you're going with the whole line at all, do you want someone to google EU food safety standards and compare them to US ones for you?), but here's a couple of lists of horse butcheries in Germany and Sweden, both places I'd expect to keep a fairly close eye on food safety.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:46

Wickerman: Feb 26, 2007; Boom, mothafucka!

Most people don't butcher an animal while they're still alive. Lol @ the horse poo poo steaks, have you ever hunted before in your life??? Field dressing game is easy unless you have brain damage.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:47

pr0zac: Jan 18, 2004; ~*lukecagefan69*~; Pillbug

NancyPants posted:

You're right, but the inherent economic disadvantages of food-safe (and humane) horse slaughter are a huge incentive to not do it safely. With no established way to ensure the safety of horse meat in a country with a sport horse population of 9.5 million (the largest in the world), an outright ban is a great way to keep that poo poo out of our food supply. US horsemeat is not fit for human consumption. Statistically horse sashimi is very likely to be Seabiscuit's retarded brother. Canada imports over half its meat horses from the US (where we raise no horses for food), slaughters it, then exports the meat worldwide.

I have no philosophical problems with the eating of specific animals. I do have welfare concerns for intelligent animals. The horse is a garbage animal and anyone raising one for food would be a moron, which is why no one raises them for food.

I have no opinion on this but I'm really enjoying how angry you are about horse slaughter logistical impossibilities. Like unironically I'm enjoying your arguments.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:47

Wickerman: Feb 26, 2007; Boom, mothafucka!

meat horses in the US are banned solely because of humanitarian issues. "they are pets therefore we shouldnt eat them." same as cats and dogs.

there is no other reason.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:49

Krispy Wafer: Jul 26, 2002; I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat; Grimey Drawer

Wickerman posted:

Most people don't butcher an animal while they're still alive. Lol @ the horse poo poo steaks, have you ever hunted before in your life??? Field dressing game is easy unless you have brain damage.

I think the problem is industrial slaughterhouses where you're processing the meat as quickly as possible and nicking the intestines with a stray blade is much easier.

I have no idea if they slaughtered horses in the same fashion as cows or pigs though. Since the meat would be exported they'd probably run at a slower speed like they do for Muslim and Jewish meats.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:50

BonerGhost: Mar 9, 2007

Krispy Kareem posted:

I think the problem is industrial slaughterhouses where you're processing the meat as quickly as possible and nicking the intestines with a stray blade is much easier.

I have no idea if they slaughtered horses in the same fashion as cows or pigs though. Since the meat would be exported they'd probably run at a slower speed like they do for Muslim and Jewish meats.

Bingo

Osama Dozen-Dongs posted:

Dunno about your exacting standards (or actually where you're going with the whole line at all, do you want someone to google EU food safety standards and compare them to US ones for you?), but here's a couple of lists of horse butcheries in Germany and Sweden, both places I'd expect to keep a fairly close eye on food safety.

Read the rest of the very sentence you quoted.

UK standards were so good they had a mad cow outbreak for 20 years. If other EU countries have improved and have good standards in place, great. Importing current US horse stock for human consumption is a bad idea.

Ee:

pr0zac posted:

I have no opinion on this but I'm really enjoying how angry you are about horse slaughter logistical impossibilities. Like unironically I'm enjoying your arguments.

Why would I be mad about people eating garbage animals?

BonerGhost fucked around with this message at 18:08 on Aug 29, 2016

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:52

Wickerman: Feb 26, 2007; Boom, mothafucka!

most industrial slaughter houses "knock" animals before butcher, but yeah i could see the nicking part. but even then, carcasses are sprayed out after gutting to keep in line with FDA sanitization guidelines.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:54

Wickerman: Feb 26, 2007; Boom, mothafucka!

this is why for safe food prep any ground meats should be thoroughly cooked and any whole cuts should be cooked on the exterior. horses are no different and any implication otherwise is misguided

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:55

Phone: Jul 30, 2005; 親子丼をほしい。

Trillian posted:

Usually it is not raised for the purpose, it's tasty racehorse. Canada does fairly brisk business in horse slaughter because unwanted horses can be imported from the US. It's mostly exported, though, and only really commonly seen in Quebec.

I went looking for a source to back me up and learned of a whole new dimension of horse BWM-ness:

Yeah, the Japanese are famous picky eaters. You know, the people who eat loving fermented red beans for breakfast.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:58

Wickerman: Feb 26, 2007; Boom, mothafucka!

oh yeah its also illegal to sell horses in the US to foreign slaughterhouses. i think the law is something like, you aren't allowed to sell your horse to a party that you know is going to slaughter it for meat.

so it appeases the humanitarians while still allowing export of horses for eating if you are ethically lax

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:01

Osama Dozen-Dongs: Nov 29, 2014

NancyPants posted:

UK standards were so good they had a mad cow outbreak for 20 years.

I was wondering why you brough up the UK, since they don't even (traditionally) eat horse there. Also, nice dodge.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:06

blugu64: Jul 17, 2006; Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?

Trillian posted:

Usually it is not raised for the purpose, it's tasty racehorse. Canada does fairly brisk business in horse slaughter because unwanted horses can be imported from the US. It's mostly exported, though, and only really commonly seen in Quebec.

I went looking for a source to back me up and learned of a whole new dimension of horse BWM-ness:

I want to know more about that Porsche Fish.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:15

BonerGhost: Mar 9, 2007

Osama Dozen-Dongs posted:

I was wondering why you brough up the UK, since they don't even (traditionally) eat horse there. Also, nice dodge.

It's not a dodge, they're in the EU. Again, if other EU countries have good standards in place, that's good. If they've shown it's not impossible to safely slaughter and butcher horses on a large scale, also good. It doesn't change the fact that eating animals not raised for consumption is not the best idea. If they're raising them and slaughtering, they've shown it works on their scale. I would be curious to see if those techniques could ever translate to the scale of US meat production.

What am I missing? E: besides the links you sent to documents in German.

Ee: VVV that is fair

BonerGhost fucked around with this message at 18:42 on Aug 29, 2016

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:18

Moneyball: Jul 11, 2005; It's a problem you think we need to explain ourselves.

NancyPants posted:

What am I missing? E: besides the links you sent to documents in German.

A story about somebody bad with money.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:23

monster on a stick: Apr 29, 2013

Business, Finance, and Careers � Bad With Money: They eat horses, don't they?

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:26

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

BWM thread:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBWtiFUm2Gs

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:27

Adiabatic: Nov 18, 2007; What have you assholes done now?

This argument is horrible you are all horrible here's a BWM story about ignoring student loan debt also whats cosigning mean

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:34

darkwasthenight: Jan 7, 2011; GENE TRAITOR

blugu64 posted:

I want to know more about that Porsche Fish.

That would probably be Bluefin Tuna. There is an auction for the first catch of the season and that can go into 7 figure prices. In US Dollars, not yen.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:35

pr0zac: Jan 18, 2004; ~*lukecagefan69*~; Pillbug

NancyPants posted:

Why would I be mad about people eating garbage animals?

You aren't mad about people eating horses, thats why its great. You have strong opinions specifically on the logistical difficulties involved in raising and slaughtering horses for food and its awesome.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 19:09

Renegret: May 26, 2007; THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*

Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Adiabatic posted:

This argument is horrible you are all horrible here's a BWM story about ignoring student loan debt also whats cosigning mean

I like threads that start off with "my situation is complicated", because it never is.

Help I defaulted on my loans why did my credit score tank?????

# ? Aug 29, 2016 19:42

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Adiabatic posted:

This argument is horrible you are all horrible here's a BWM story about ignoring student loan debt also whats cosigning mean

quote:

Also I am no longer in contact with the cosigner and last I heard they we were scammed into paying on what they believed was the loan but no money actually went to paying it off.

I bet the cosigner is just thrilled to be tied to all this. Also highly likely they did pay on the loan, but late fees+interest ate up most or all of it.

Renegret posted:

I like threads that start off with "my situation is complicated", because it never is.

Help I defaulted on my loans why did my credit score tank?????

But I thought I was on a path to pay it off, what do you mean I can't just pay less on my loan and have it be ok???

# ? Aug 29, 2016 19:48

BonerGhost: Mar 9, 2007

I feel bad for the derail because that is not the fun type of horsechat. Unfortunately, no hits in r/personal finance for "ant farm", but I did come up with this:

My mom is going to give me her investment property and wants me to gift her back $14k every year and I think that is both fair and legal.

My mom is looking to separate from my step-father for the second time and wants to park $200k in my checking account. This doesn't seem right but I can't explain why.

Sometimes we get paid in hay.

E: "In your scenario, you mention that we'd get $1000 worth of hay for a $300 boarding bill. Even though we wouldn't have the cash right now, in a few weeks, that would be $700 that we wouldn't need to spend on hay. We could then use that money to get ahead on bills.....not really...lol....that poo poo never happens with horses.....you see, horses are psychic and they know when you get extra money."

BonerGhost fucked around with this message at 20:01 on Aug 29, 2016

# ? Aug 29, 2016 19:54

Barry: Aug 1, 2003; Hardened Criminal

NancyPants posted:

Sometimes we get paid in hay.

Horsechat, the gift that keeps on giving

# ? Aug 29, 2016 20:03

pathetic little tramp: Dec 12, 2005; by Hillary Clinton's assassins; Fallen Rib

NancyPants posted:

I feel bad for the derail because that is not the fun type of horsechat. Unfortunately, no hits in r/personal finance for "ant farm", but I did come up with this:

My mom is going to give me her investment property and wants me to gift her back $14k every year and I think that is both fair and legal.

My mom is looking to separate from my step-father for the second time and wants to park $200k in my checking account. This doesn't seem right but I can't explain why.

Sometimes we get paid in hay.

E: "In your scenario, you mention that we'd get $1000 worth of hay for a $300 boarding bill. Even though we wouldn't have the cash right now, in a few weeks, that would be $700 that we wouldn't need to spend on hay. We could then use that money to get ahead on bills.....not really...lol....that poo poo never happens with horses.....you see, horses are psychic and they know when you get extra money."

from later in that:

quote:

I'd like to say it all works out in the end, but it doesn't.

print that poo poo on us currency

# ? Aug 29, 2016 20:06

Adiabatic: Nov 18, 2007; What have you assholes done now?

NancyPants posted:

My mom is going to give me her investment property and wants me to gift her back $14k every year and I think that is both fair and legal.

Isn't this like, the definition of the head shot?

# ? Aug 29, 2016 20:15

Teeter: Jul 21, 2005; Hey guys! I'm having a good time, what about you?

pathetic little tramp posted:

from later in that:

print that poo poo on us currency

If cigarettes now have to put ugly pictures and poo poo on the packaging then it's only fair for our paper currency to be printed with warnings about owning a horse.

Teeter fucked around with this message at 20:19 on Aug 29, 2016

# ? Aug 29, 2016 20:16

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 22:18

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Adiabatic posted:

Isn't this like, the definition of the head shot?

No - there's no mortgage involved. The head shot is where you get a loan for a down payment, and lie on the mortgage application and say it's your money, when really you are obligated to pay it back.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 20:36

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Bad w/ Money: I just paid for a fat bitches Electric Cock Zapping Sex Toy in Kentucky

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