Uncle Chesty's School for Wayward Boys

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Uncle Chesty's School for Wayward Boys

McNally: Sep 13, 2007; Ask me about Proposition 305

Do you like muskets?

Steezo posted:

Name changed to protect the guilty, incompetent, gloryhounding, shitweasel who was universally despised. Once he was gone I never heard "To The Rear of the Piece FALL IN!" again and somehow we would get off on time and our broken poo poo got fixed or replaced and the 1stSgt seemed more calm and Zen like.

Of course he only got shuffled to HQ Battery where his adamant refusal to display anything remotely resembling competence or accountability meant they didn't know what the gently caress a challenge and pass were but they sure heard him flipping out about "Oh poo poo Iraqis have NVG's and stolen Humvees!" and therefore shot at our guys doing route recon so we could get out of the goat poo poo pos without destroying more truck tires. Fortunately it was HQ and the 240 jammed after only hitting one Marine.

So... two lessons there, one know your challenge and pass and when/how to use it especially when you have everything from the firing batteries on forward between you and the enemy and two, I dont want to type out, but, the enemy is anyone who will get you killed

Edit: I think I need tit pics now, thanks in advance.

Sorry to make you drag all that up.

What I meant was do you know first hand that he was, in fact, delicious?

# ? Aug 24, 2016 21:16

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 04:26

Steezo: Jun 16, 2003; Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!

Booblord Zagats posted:

http://imgur.com/i1RY09R http://i.imgur.com/aBrH5p1.jpg

Much appreciated.

As for his nickname it was phonetically similar and what everyone called him when drunk because it pissed him off.

# ? Aug 25, 2016 06:16

Bob A Feet: Aug 10, 2005; Dear diary, I got another erection today at work. SO embarrassing, but kinda hot. The CO asked me to fix up his dress uniform. I had stayed late at work to move his badges 1/8" to the left and pointed it out this morning. 1SG spanked me while the CO watched, once they caught it. Tomorrow I get to start all over again...

One of my Marines is now a pfc for getting caught, via nanny cam, masturbating in his female Sergeants house while puppy sitting. And teaching it the peanut butter trick. But that's not in the verbiage of the njp.

# ? Aug 26, 2016 00:00

Booblord Zagats: Oct 30, 2011; Pork Pro

Bob A Feet posted:

One of my Marines is now a pfc for getting caught, via nanny cam, masturbating in his female Sergeants house while puppy sitting. And teaching it the peanut butter trick. But that's not in the verbiage of the njp.

Smemper fie

# ? Aug 26, 2016 04:06

TheArmorOfContempt: Nov 29, 2012; Did I ever tell you my favorite color was blue?

Booblord Zagats posted:

http://imgur.com/i1RY09R http://i.imgur.com/aBrH5p1.jpg

Niiiiccceeeee.

Bob A Feet posted:

One of my Marines is now a pfc for getting caught, via nanny cam, masturbating in his female Sergeants house while puppy sitting. And teaching it the peanut butter trick. But that's not in the verbiage of the njp.

What rank was he before? I find it odd that he is doing housework for his Sergeant for some reason. I'm jaded so I would've suspected them of either A) loving B) her using her authority to force a Marine to use his personal time to watch her dog.

Slightly less weird and more traditional Marine gently caress-up we had a Corporal get the dog poo poo beat out of him by the police in front of a strip club. Charged with resisting arrest, one of my guys, but since I'm not on active duty anymore I absolutely refuse to take responsibility for dumb poo poo that happens unless it is specifically during work hours.

TheArmorOfContempt fucked around with this message at 21:27 on Sep 1, 2016

# ? Sep 1, 2016 21:22

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

Uroboros posted:

Niiiiccceeeee.

What rank was he before? I find it odd that he is doing housework for his Sergeant for some reason. I'm jaded so I would've suspected them of either A) loving B) her using her authority to force a Marine to use his personal time to watch her dog.

Slightly less weird and more traditional Marine gently caress-up we had a Corporal get the dog poo poo beat out of him by the police in front of a strip club. Charged with resisting arrest, one of my guys, but since I'm not on active duty anymore I absolutely refuse to take responsibility for dumb poo poo that happens unless it is specifically during work hours.

if it happens during a drill weekend, people can get charged under the ucmj. pretty sure...not something that was really ever explained.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 21:41

Booblord Zagats: Oct 30, 2011; Pork Pro

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

if it happens during a drill weekend, people can get charged under the ucmj. pretty sure...not something that was really ever explained.

I had it explained to me that it can always be charged using ucmj assuming your CO and the JAG hate you enough

# ? Sep 1, 2016 21:57

TheArmorOfContempt: Nov 29, 2012; Did I ever tell you my favorite color was blue?

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

if it happens during a drill weekend, people can get charged under the ucmj. pretty sure...not something that was really ever explained.

Unsure if it is worth taking action unless he is convicted, which he still doesn't have a court date. He had to shell out 10 grand for bail, so I don't know what I can do to him short of getting him kicked out that rivals that. Basically I'm waiting to see what the court says. Accounts are he totally had it coming, but he of course swears he was innocent.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 22:50

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

Booblord Zagats posted:

I had it explained to me that it can always be charged using ucmj assuming your CO and the JAG hate you enough

if you're a reservist, i think you're only subject to the ucmj during drill weekend. whatever the case, they would have to put you on active duty to charge and try you for anything anyways. no unit is going to do that when they can probably just find some other reason to kick you out.

# ? Sep 2, 2016 00:19

red19fire: May 26, 2010

Booblord Zagats posted:

I had it explained to me that it can always be charged using ucmj assuming your CO and the JAG hate you enough

Yeah when I was a legal clerk a guy got a dui off base, and the sja hammered him under the ucmj after his criminal court case, and called me an rear end in a top hat for asking if that was a double jeopardy violation.

# ? Sep 2, 2016 20:30

Nice and hot piss: Feb 1, 2004

In the army all I saw were people busted for dealing meth. One guy was apparently a pretty big meth dealer in central Kansas and did time at the federal Penn in Leavenworth *not ft Leavenworth* and kept saying that he met Michael Vick.

Its somewhat believable since he was there at the same time.

# ? Sep 3, 2016 16:26

PookBear: Nov 1, 2008

red19fire posted:

Yeah when I was a legal clerk a guy got a dui off base, and the sja hammered him under the ucmj after his criminal court case, and called me an rear end in a top hat for asking if that was a double jeopardy violation.

I've always wondered how its not a double jeopardy violation

# ? Sep 3, 2016 16:50

Internet Wizard: Aug 9, 2009; BANDAIDS DON'T FIX BULLET HOLES

Reverand maynard posted:

I've always wondered how its not a double jeopardy violation

The same action can break multiple laws.

Also joining the military involves forfeiting a bunch of the constitutional rights.

# ? Sep 3, 2016 17:08

Kawasaki Nun: Jul 16, 2001; by Reene

Reverand maynard posted:

I've always wondered how its not a double jeopardy violation

If you break a law that is regulated by multiple jurisdictions then you are subject to each of those jurisdictions legal processes. So if you break both a state and federal law (like a DUI and a UCMJ violation) you can get hosed by either, both, or none depending on the circumstances.

# ? Sep 3, 2016 20:19

StabbyRipStabStab: Nov 4, 2009; I got the internet going nuts.

In a lot of DUI cases, the service member gets non-judicial punishment. NJP is not a criminal charge, therefore no double jeopardy.

Also - there is generally an order associated with alcohol policy, and a DUI will most likely not comply with that order. So you can get hit with disobeying a lawful order.

StabbyRipStabStab fucked around with this message at 19:43 on Sep 4, 2016

# ? Sep 4, 2016 19:36

joat mon: Oct 15, 2009; I am the master of my lamp;
I am the captain of my tub.

Reverand maynard posted:

I've always wondered how its not a double jeopardy violation

Separate Sovereigns

# ? Sep 6, 2016 16:23

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

joat mon posted:

Separate Sovereigns

whats it called when the feds prosecute someone for violating a state law w/ no corresponding federal law on federal land, lawyer man?

# ? Sep 6, 2016 23:43

Booblord Zagats: Oct 30, 2011; Pork Pro

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

whats it called when the feds prosecute someone for violating a state law w/ no corresponding federal law on federal land, lawyer man?

Wil'n out

# ? Sep 7, 2016 01:43

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

whats it called when the feds prosecute someone for violating a state law w/ no corresponding federal law on federal land, lawyer man?

Its something called the Assimilative Crimes Act that allows a federal officer to enforce a state law on federal land when congress or other governing agency is silent.

https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/18/13

# ? Sep 7, 2016 01:55

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

Mr. Nice! posted:

Its something called the Assimilative Crimes Act that allows a federal officer to enforce a state law on federal land when congress or other governing agency is silent.

https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/18/13

have you passed the bar, ballpain esq?

# ? Sep 7, 2016 01:58

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

have you passed the bar, ballpain esq?

Taking it in February since I finished my degree this summer and didn't want to flip around and take it two weeks later.

# ? Sep 7, 2016 02:20

Time Crisis Actor: Apr 28, 2002; by Hand Knit

This Marine adapted and overcame life http://www.military.com/daily-news/2016/09/07/marine-found-dead-had-killed-wifes-boyfriend-set-home-on-fire.html

quote:

Marine Found Dead Had Killed Wife's Boyfriend, Set Home on Fire

New information shows a Marine staff sergeant found dead in a burning home near Richlands, North Carolina, was killed in an act of self-defense by his estranged wife after he killed her boyfriend, officials with the Onslow County Sheriff's Office said Wednesday.

Staff Sgt. Cody Wade Smith, 33, was found dead alongside 43-year-old Gregory Thomas Pearce inside the house on Haw Branch Road on Aug. 27.

Smith had returned from a deployment to Europe with Camp Lejeune's 2nd Light Armored Reconnaissance Battalion weeks before, but little had been publicly released about the circumstances surrounding his death until today.

In a press conference, sheriff's office officials said Monica Rose Smith, 32, had served the Marine with divorce papers Aug. 11. Smith arranged to come by her house on the evening of Aug. 27 to drop off some personal property, Maj. Chris Thomas said.

Smith arrived around 5 p.m. with a backpack containing two handguns, duct tape, rope, lighter fluid and matches, Thomas said. He also had a large can of gasoline in his vehicle.

When Monica Smith tried to get the Marine to leave the house around 5:30 p.m., he tied her up, then used her phone to send text messages to Pearce, who arrived at the home half an hour later.

When Pearce discovered Monica was tied up, he tried to call 911, but was shot and killed by Smith, Thomas said. Smith then sprayed lighter fluid on the floor and set the house on fire.

# ? Sep 7, 2016 23:56

Time Crisis Actor: Apr 28, 2002; by Hand Knit

Pretty good video from 3/5 in Sangin. I'm not sure if it was *that* 3/5 Sangin deployment (since that was like 2010), but it could be.
Anyhoo, enjoy. You might get some war sads tho

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xcjb1f1qbBA

# ? Sep 30, 2016 22:29

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

pretty sure its the 2010 deployment.

# ? Sep 30, 2016 23:58

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

Just another day in the barracks

https://i.imgur.com/nh9p9xa.gifv

# ? Oct 2, 2016 00:33

Nice and hot piss: Feb 1, 2004

There isn't a single thing wrong with what I see there.

# ? Oct 2, 2016 01:52

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

I'm the guy getting the cig butt

# ? Oct 2, 2016 02:10

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

im all the idiot goons everywhere that have said 'disband the marines'

# ? Oct 2, 2016 14:26

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

Someone mentioned it in GIP before and I think it's a good idea. Make the Marines an all reserve force

# ? Oct 2, 2016 21:53

Flikken: Oct 23, 2009; 10,363 snaps and not a playoff win to show for it

Nostalgia4Dicks posted:

Someone mentioned it in GIP before and I think it's a good idea. Make the Marines an all reserve force

Actually I think we should keep up the light quick deployment unit's numbers and move the heavy mechanized stuff to the guard/reserve.

# ? Oct 2, 2016 22:14

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

maybe we can pray to ss-19 satan to disband the marine corps for max lolz.

# ? Oct 3, 2016 04:53

Thump!: Nov 25, 2007; Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!

Nostalgia4Dicks posted:

Just another day in the barracks

https://i.imgur.com/nh9p9xa.gifv

I'm the spent bottle of vodka

# ? Oct 3, 2016 14:59

PookBear: Nov 1, 2008

I just noticed the kiss at the beginning

# ? Oct 3, 2016 15:03

Booblord Zagats: Oct 30, 2011; Pork Pro

No way those are US Marines, I don't see a single EGA tat

# ? Oct 3, 2016 16:08

bug chaser chaser: Dec 11, 2006

i thought those were chavs

# ? Oct 3, 2016 16:59

Thump!: Nov 25, 2007; Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!

I feel like they're Russians, which really when you think about they're the Marines of humanity.

# ? Oct 3, 2016 17:10

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

Booblord Zagats posted:

No way those are US Marines, I don't see a single EGA tat

i guess we might all be wrong for assuming the shirtless retards with bad haircuts doing stupid poo poo were Marines. 1/1000000 shot there.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 03:17

overdesigned: Apr 10, 2003; We are compassion...; Lipstick Apathy

https://twitter.com/SydneyFreedberg/status/783326986508832769

I nominate Gen. Neller as Commmandant-for-Life based upon this quote alone

# ? Oct 4, 2016 16:38

Bernard McFacknutah: Nov 13, 2009

Booblord Zagats posted:

No way those are US Marines, I don't see a single EGA tat

Those are brits, judging by the Reebok classic trainers, poo poo PVC double glazing and 4 pint milk jug on the floor.

# ? Oct 5, 2016 00:25

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 04:26

Bob A Feet: Aug 10, 2005; Dear diary, I got another erection today at work. SO embarrassing, but kinda hot. The CO asked me to fix up his dress uniform. I had stayed late at work to move his badges 1/8" to the left and pointed it out this morning. 1SG spanked me while the CO watched, once they caught it. Tomorrow I get to start all over again...

So just how bad is camp Wilson

# ? Oct 11, 2016 12:20

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