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The stones are a good macguffin for this story because they say "What if you could make objective reality conform to the way you feel when you're high?" They are the terror of permanent heroin. Everything really is achievable by shooting up. You really will be as happy forever as you feel when you're peaking. Why chase friendship, family, and a fulfilling existence when you can take the shortcut? They're kind of like the antithesis of the funhole from The Cipher, which says, 'is it worth pursuing something genuinely new and mind-expanding as an escape from your hellish everyday existence, even if that new thing is inherently destructive and abusive?" e: or alternately 'is it better to be creatively and radically destroyed than to be suffocatingly mediocre?' General Battuta fucked around with this message at 20:20 on Sep 10, 2016 |
# ? Sep 10, 2016 20:16 |
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# ? Jun 5, 2024 03:09 |
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General Battuta posted:The stones are a good macguffin for this story because they say "What if you could make objective reality conform to the way you feel when you're high?" I mean, you're probably right but that isn't what I, personally, extrapolated from reading the query itself
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 20:27 |
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That sounds like something to clue up better in the query, then!
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 20:32 |
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Danknificent posted:How many people who want a story about addiction reach for the fantasy shelf? How many people who want a fantasy want a story about addiction? Do you watch Trainspotting and think to yourself "What this story needs is some saturday morning magic antics," or Stephen Universe and think "This show needs more heroin," Addiction is an interesting topic to use in fantasy, for most of the reasons Battuta already mentioned. I strongly disagree that making a character a junkie makes them inherently unlikeable. Valen from Carol Berg's Lighthouse Duet is addicted to a magic drug, to a degree that becomes plot-critical, and he's one of my favorite protagonists in fantasy for both his flaws and how he tries to fight against them. Though I've also seen reviews where readers hated him for it, so ymmv Reading the blurb, it's interesting, but right now your main problem seems to be that the way it's described, the pieces don't seem to quite fit together. Which might be why it's earning these responses. Consider how the story elements connect thematically and use that to tie it together, like Battuta suggested, and maybe put emphasis on her wanting out to counteract this knee-jerk "eww junkies gross" reaction.
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 21:15 |
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What is worse to the goon writer, jukies or sports?
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 21:33 |
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Djeser posted:What is worse to the goon writer, jukies or sports? sprot bad
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 21:36 |
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also, who you calling a jukie
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 21:36 |
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sports good
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 21:40 |
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flerp posted:sports good sprot blood
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 21:52 |
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RedTonic posted:sprot blood This is 100% unrelated to the topic at hand but I really enjoy the evolution of your avatar
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:01 |
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Djeser posted:What is worse to the goon writer, jukies or sports? New pitch for a story: dude who competes in the drug olympics and has to take the most drugs to win. He's cool, hot, and a certified sex-haver, but the popularity courts will rip up his sex-having certification if he fails the drug-off. If he wants to succeed in continuing a life of awesome hetero-sex, he's got to do drugs in a cooler and more badass way than anyone has ever done them before. Also he's got a magic rock. EDIT In retrospect this might just be a magic Beerfest. FormerPoster fucked around with this message at 22:46 on Sep 10, 2016 |
# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:43 |
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Naerasa posted:New pitch for a story: dude who competes in the drug olympics and has to take the most drugs to win. He's cool, hot, and a certified sex-haver, but the popularity courts will rip up his sex-having certification if he fails the drug-off. If he wants to succeed in continuing a life of awesome hetero-sex, he's got to do drugs in a cooler and more badass way than anyone has ever done them before. Also he's got a magic rock. Wasn't this just The Magicians?
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 22:57 |
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change my name posted:Wasn't this just The Magicians? I seem to recall the main guy from the Magicians working very hard to remind everyone how he's not cool at all and instead extremely misunderstood and edgy, like Reaper. In fairness, most of what I recall from that book is tainted by book two being about them summoning a rapist furry.
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:28 |
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General Battuta posted:"A heroin junkie tries to trick her boyfriend into giving up his reality-warping stone so she can escape into her own dreams - but keeping the stone forces her to make choices that drive her even deeper into addiction.' tbf that's a lot better than what he wrote
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:43 |
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Well, Battuta is among the few and proud here who've successfully secured representation, so he's got to have strong query skills.Sitting Here posted:This is 100% unrelated to the topic at hand but I really enjoy the evolution of your avatar It's really taken on a life of its own, I think. From ACG to Parts Kit to Yobgoblin and HaveARottenDay of BYOB... I'm very festive right now. Naerasa posted:EDIT In retrospect this might just be a magic Beerfest. This reminds me of a couple things. 1. Some Twitter folks' rich fantasy lives which are currently being lived out in my twat feed. Or whatever we call it. 2. Did you ever read the long form article about that failed race-walker? Naerasa posted:I seem to recall the main guy from the Magicians working very hard to remind everyone how he's not cool at all and instead extremely misunderstood and edgy, like Reaper. And this just makes me glad I haven't read the series. Status update on my sub to Angry Robot's last open call: no update, still in "received" status on Submittable. Going to die of blue balls.
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# ? Sep 10, 2016 23:48 |
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RedTonic posted:
I don't know what a race-walker is, but in my head I'm imagining it as some kind of day-walker style vampire that can switch races at nighttime, giving them the ability to write in the 'own voices' category for multiple diverse narratives.
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 00:08 |
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Naerasa posted:I don't know what a race-walker is, but in my head I'm imagining it as some kind of day-walker style vampire that can switch races at nighttime, giving them the ability to write in the 'own voices' category for multiple diverse narratives. Trans-ethnic. But no, it's actually an Olympic sporting event. Here's the story I was thinking of.
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 00:16 |
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RedTonic posted:Trans-ethnic. I have no idea what the gently caress I just read but I think I was moved by it.
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 00:29 |
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Naerasa posted:I have no idea what the gently caress I just read but I think I was moved by it. Mission accomplished!
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 00:33 |
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RedTonic posted:And this just makes me glad I haven't read the series.
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 03:56 |
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Naerasa posted:Jane Doherty wants to quit using heroin, but getting high is her only source of happiness. Her equally-addicted boyfriend Charlie says his life is just as hard as hers, but Jane has trouble believing him until he tells her why. He’s got a stone with the power to warp reality, but he isn’t the only one. There’s a group of people with powers like his, and it’s Charlie’s job to kill them before they can kill him. I don't have a problem with a heroin addict protagonist. Yall motherfucks read Sherlock Holmes? Or watch House? Read Philip K. Dick? Burroughs? Come on. I know there are some agents out there fresh from Sunday school who will reject a manuscript if it contains swears; I can't say what portion of your audience would be alienated by a little brown horse, but it's certainly not a death-blow to the story's appeal. Anyway, for me personally, here's where I'm turned off: 1) Magic rocks in modern setting. Normally I think of urban fantasy as fantasy drawn from the setting, not inserted into it. A cell phone that calls the dead? Fits. Excalibur in the parking lot behind Wendy's? Doesn't fit. Maybe your story conveys a more concordant tone, but it clashes in the blurb. 2) If Jane wants to quit bad enough to undertake a quest, why isn't her quest to check her rear end into rehab? Shivering out a couple weeks has to be easier than this. The story appears to have two unrelated problems with two unrelated motivations: Jane wants to quit H though her boyfriend doesn't, and unrelatedly: Wizards want to kill me. 3) The specifics of Jane's plan are confusing and I don't feel like they're relevant to whether I want to read this book.
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 13:47 |
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I just want to say that if you haven't given Thunderdome a chance, try it out! Nothing else has improved my writing and losing last week might be the best thing that's happened to my craft. It's a very humbling experience and killed my ego so I just strive to write good stories instead of being a prissy special snowflake whose writing talent is unquestionable. It's just really fun! Plus, it gives you a ticket to join the IRC channel and meet interesting and cool people around the world. /blog
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 14:53 |
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quote:Jane Doherty wants to quit using heroin, but getting high is her only source of happiness. Her equally-addicted boyfriend Charlie says his life is just as hard as hers, but Jane has trouble believing him until he tells her why. He’s got a stone with the power to warp reality, but he isn’t the only one. There’s a group of people with powers like his, and it’s Charlie’s job to kill them before they can kill him. I loathe drug use in all forms and my interest in Trainspotting is precisely zero, but I've read urban fantasy with a junkie protagonist who was also a bit of an rear end in a top hat and enjoyed it. It can certainly be done. What would keep me away from your book if this were your back-cover copy is that heroin and Jane's addiction to it are being presented as the core of your story. If I'm reaching for an urban fantasy novel, my interest is going to be more in the reality-warping stones and the Highlander-style murderfest going on. Those are kept so vague in comparison! The line that makes the least sense to me is "Her equally-addicted boyfriend Charlie says his life is just as hard as hers, but Jane has trouble believing him [...]." Addiction is her main problem, he's as addicted as she is, but she can't believe his life sucks too? What? Maybe drop equally-addicted from that line. I wonder if he even needs to be an addict himself; Twist's question about why somebody with reality-warping stones would be on heroin is a good one. But of course I haven't read more than this blurb, and that point may be more important and sensible in context. I'd leave it out of the query, though, I think. I can't speak as an agent, but if you wanted to hook me as an urban fantasy reader you'd mostly need to move the focus of your blurb from DRUGS DRUGS DRUGS to A woman with problems finds herself caught up in a whirl of power and murder outside of known reality. Go ahead and mention drugs as part of the picture, but put the urban fantasy elements in the foreground, not the periphery. Kaishai fucked around with this message at 16:38 on Sep 11, 2016 |
# ? Sep 11, 2016 16:31 |
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I'd read a fantasy novel about Jane's Addiction.
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 16:45 |
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Schneider Heim posted:I just want to say that if you haven't given Thunderdome a chance, try it out! Nothing else has improved my writing and losing last week might be the best thing that's happened to my craft. It's a very humbling experience and killed my ego so I just strive to write good stories instead of being a prissy special snowflake whose writing talent is unquestionable. It's just really fun! Thunderdome isn't a cure-all, but it helped give me an incentive to write on a regular basis and introduced me to a stable writing group that provided advice and criticism, something which I'd never had before. If you're looking for either of those things, give it a shot.
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# ? Sep 11, 2016 16:48 |
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Ironic Twist posted:Thunderdome isn't a cure-all, but it helped give me an incentive to write on a regular basis and introduced me to a stable writing group that provided advice and criticism, something which I'd never had before. Already got both of those. Been writing every day for over two years now and I'm a member of two writing groups, one broad and one focused on speculative fiction. Thunderdome sounds pretty cool, but between shopping around one book, editing another, and outlining a third, I'm not exactly brimming with time to take on side projects. If anything, I've got too much on my plate. Having said that, this thread has been a very good source of advice, which is especially amazing since it's usually dead. I definitely didn't expect my query to attract this much attention, I'll say that much. Kaishai posted:I loathe drug use in all forms and my interest in Trainspotting is precisely zero, but I've read urban fantasy with a junkie protagonist who was also a bit of an rear end in a top hat and enjoyed it. Mind telling me which one? I'm not happy with one of my comp titles and it's hard to search goodreads for 'urban fantasy with addiction issues' when the addiction isn't to werewolf dick. FormerPoster fucked around with this message at 19:11 on Sep 11, 2016 |
# ? Sep 11, 2016 18:44 |
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http://www.authorspublish.com/manuscript-guide-2016/quote:Free eBook: no idea how legit this is
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# ? Sep 13, 2016 02:19 |
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Why would you want to trad publish without an agent, though? It's good to know the markets, but going out there alone seems...unnecessary, at best, actively bad at worst.
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# ? Sep 13, 2016 03:18 |
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Thoughts on mixing first and third person narratives? I want to do something similar to what Murakami did with 1Q84 (3rd person narrative with first person thoughts in italics) but much more constrained to a single character and only on new lines as to not break the narrative flow. He kind of went overboard in that book.
change my name fucked around with this message at 04:49 on Sep 17, 2016 |
# ? Sep 17, 2016 04:44 |
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I know this question has been answered enough times in the past, but I've dug around and I can't find it and so I'll ask again and maybe tattoo the answer backwards across my forehead: How long should a manuscript be before and after editing? The current one I'm on is 9078 words long and 379 double-spaced pages at 13pt. Times New Roman. I'm working to reduce the wordcount while completely rewriting some scenes -- and cutting out the more obvious, cringeworthy pop culture references. This story is a labor of love, but I want to polish this turd enough to send to publishers someday. If genre matters, it's comic sci-fi with elements of fantasy, and it's not YA because I'm fond of naughty language.
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 04:59 |
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Are y'all ready to die for your art? http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/books-novelist-runs-fiery-home-laptop-42123730 quote:Avoiding a nasty real-life plot twist, a writer dashed past firefighters into a burning New Orleans house Thursday to rescue two completed novels stored on his laptop. Though personally I feel a lot more concerned for the poor guy mentioned at the end: quote:Edderin Williams, 38, had enough time to grab his wallet and keys before rushing out of his apartment, one of four in the building, but was not able to save anything more. He does not have renter's insurance.
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 05:33 |
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Screaming Idiot posted:I know this question has been answered enough times in the past, but I've dug around and I can't find it and so I'll ask again and maybe tattoo the answer backwards across my forehead: How long should a manuscript be before and after editing? The current one I'm on is 9078 words long and 379 double-spaced pages at 13pt. Times New Roman. Length can be genre dependent. SFF tends to be in the 70-100k range, but a lot goes over 100. 80-90 is generally safe in almost any genre. Danknificent fucked around with this message at 05:56 on Sep 17, 2016 |
# ? Sep 17, 2016 05:49 |
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HIJK posted:Are y'all ready to die for your art? This guy needs to quit stealing material.
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 20:37 |
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someone should do the world a favor and burn my writing, but lol it's in the cloud I am really struggling with the idea that someone in 2016 with a laptop wouldn't back their poo poo up online
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 20:44 |
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Sitting Here posted:someone should do the world a favor and burn my writing, but lol it's in the cloud He was afraid someone would steal his ideas
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 22:04 |
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sebmojo posted:He was afraid someone would steal his ideas you might say he should've put a watermark on them
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 22:07 |
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also who the f is this newb, hello friend have you considered checking out the thunders dome
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 22:08 |
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Sitting Here posted:someone should do the world a favor and burn my writing, but lol it's in the cloud I don't because google drive is terrible nonsense so all my redundant file storage is between the computers that are all sitting in my room
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 23:04 |
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why not just e-mail your poo poo to yourself?
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 23:29 |
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# ? Jun 5, 2024 03:09 |
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Accomplishes the same thing as google drive but is way more frustrating to do? Why not
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# ? Sep 17, 2016 23:35 |