quote:

Joke aside, girlfriend is not a bad person or anything like that,

quote:

I made the effort of taking her out of the state to propose and bought a really expensive ring (10,000+) just because I wanted her to calm down

quote:

now she's complanining that "I really should have done it in Europe, you know? It's cooler, I don't know"

quote:

and it's annoying me.

WampaLord posted:

Baby's first teenage rebellion. Aww.

Another failed open relationship!

Me [29F] with my husband[32M] of 3 years. He wanted an open relationship but isn't handling it well.

mind the walrus posted:

Has there ever been a use of this phrasing where the person in-question didn't come across as garbage? I'm asking seriously here.

This guy has money to blow and odds are you don't. Remember that.

quote:

Hi everyone,

So, the other day I was on sick leave (nothing too serious), and I had taken the chance to run some errands, and hurry home with groceries to get there before my boyfriend would make it home. While cooking, I imagined how happy he would be and how nice it always is when he comes home and I have everything ready. He would be pleasantly surprised, yet again. Having read and trying to practice RPW as well as possible, I've been doing most of the cooking, cleaning and household stuff from the beginning, and letting him take charge of the bills and administration. Living together has been a dream, and he has such a gentle heart while being on top of things at the same time. We laugh together almost daily and fall asleep in each other's arms on the daily. RPW has been a source of inspiration and motivation for me and I really have so much to thank to you guys.

Fast forward to him coming home and looking surprised, but then turning silent and even acting kind of moody... When I gently asked him over dinner if anything was bothering him -ladies, sit tight for this one-, he took a breath and said: "I just wish you wouldn't take control of our kitchen so much... I like to cook, too, you know."

I WAS BLOWN AWAY. Never had I even considered him wanting to cook everyday dinners, let alone thought of the fact that he felt like I might have "taken over" the kitchen. True, I didn't ask him what he wanted for dinner everyday, but that's just because... Women belong in the kitchen, right? That's our thing? Or so I thought?

Anyway, he saw how absolutely flabbergasted I was and I was stammering how I was trying to make his everyday life easier by taking the worrying over food off of his shoulders, and he started laughing and told me how sweet that was of me, but that it really wasn't necessary. Now he cooks about half of the meals and I cook about half of the meals.

So, girls, always listen to your captain! And never assume! Even about things that seem so obvious and sensible to you that you wouldn't even think of questioning them.

TL;DR: Some captains will steal your kitchen

mind the walrus posted:

Choicest bits:

Has there ever been a use of this phrasing where the person in-question didn't come across as garbage? I'm asking seriously here.

Is he one of those guys who was like, born without a medulla oblongata or whatever part of the brain governs anger and self-respect?

mind the walrus posted:

Is he one of those guys who was like, born without a medulla oblongata or whatever part of the brain governs anger and self-respect?

Ratjaculation posted:

I swear the other side of this story was posted in E/N with the wife walking around the house covered in some guys jizz whilst the husband played video games but I can't find it

Charles Get-Out posted:

A Totally Normal and not Weird Funny Anecdote About a Relationship Foible


I feel like I'm reading Stepford Wives serials jesus christ. "Always listen to your Captain!" *pops a Valium, is a robot*

quote:

As the title suggests, my partner of 2 years whom has up until this point been very clear he wants marriage, as do I, has decided against it.

His reasons: - Too many women get married to divorce their husbands for their wealth - Women have the sole benefit of marriage and men gain nothing - It has become a feminist thing? (Don't agree with this statement at all) - He doesn't trust women (without any previous personal experience to back this theory up)

SO.. for me personally, I am devastated to say the least. I have fully committed to my partner and have been consistently improving myself where possible, a la red pill women style. We have spoken about our personal goals including marriage from the get go and he has shared his plans for his business development.

He is hoping to grow his assets and build his own property in the next ten years, and doesn't want his future wife to take that from him should we divorce.

The reason he has started thinking about this is due to the red pill for one, and he has also been looking to other men's own personal experiences with divorce and women gaining substantially from it at the husbands expense.

I am an extremely faithful person, I have not at any point wavered in this and been unfaithful. But he considers me untrustworthy and has described my honesty about how I feel as 'bullshit'. He explained that I believed I would marry my previous partner (not information I readily gave, he read one of my old diaries to gain this information without my knowledge). This is true when I wrote that, but I was naive at the time to what a relationship should be like, not what society had told me it should be like and I quickly ended up in an abusive relationship.

So all in all, I need advice from you lovely red pill women; your own personal experiences in your marriages and why it is beneficial for both parties, or any further advice you may have in bringing my partner back down to planet earth and remind him of how much he is adored.

lazorexplosion posted:

RPW is just redpillers writing fiction with one hand, right? Right?

lazorexplosion posted:

RPW is just redpillers writing fiction with one hand, right? Right?

corn on the cop posted:

TEN THOUSAND DOLLAR RING

Jenner posted:

Maybe I'm just weird?

ghosthorse posted:

awww I thought "rpw" meant role play wife and they were role playing as a 50's couple because it got them off for whatever reason. The real thing is way sadder and a lot less funny

Seven Hundred Bee posted:

nobody cares how much or how little you spent on an engagement ring please stop filing your thread with your personal anecdotes. it's not a journal.

quote:

We've been living together for almost a year now and together for 1.5 (it was originally due to convenience because he lived near my uni and work and it worked out well so we decided to make it permanent and moved out of a sharehouse). I was really pee shy around him at first too but that's fine now.

We have a really good relationship and can communicate everything well but I just can't talk about this to him. I always feel a bit bad when I can't tell him but I just can't poo unless he's either out of the house or sleeping, like I just physically can't go. I know he'll still love me and I know he's not turned off or anything but something just stops me. The two conversations we've had have lead to me just being so embarrassed and awkward because I always felt a little ashamed of it when I lived at home and I'm a very girly-girl in the sense that I just get so embarrassed about bodily functions.

Please if anyone has any advice on how to be more open about it or how to get over it, I'd really appreciate it. (Before anyone suggests therapy, I've gone for a while and I'm looking for a new therapist).

TL;DR: I can't poop around my boyfriend. What do I do?

Update: sorry I'm not replying, but I talked to him, he made jokes about it and I feel a lot better not keeping it from him any more.

quote:

Hi /relashionships.

This is a bit weird so bear with me. I met "Anna" when we were both at uni 11 years ago and for the most part, we had what I would consider an amazing relationship. From the beginning though I made sure to tell her that I wasn't ever looking to be a father. I was severely abused by my parents and grew up in a disfunctional family and never dared to even think of bringing a child to this world, fearing I would do him/her as much psychological harm as was done to me.

She looked to be ok with it and never raised any concerns. That was until her friends started having children and then, she became increasingly distant. In a hindsight, I should've seen the signs but I subconsciously chose to ignore the signs until one day last month, she sat down and dumped me. It came out of nowhere for me in a way but I understood her decision and accepted it.

She had planned the break up well though, as she had already made plans for accommodation (with a friend) and she moved out almost instantly.

After a week, she called me crying and informed me that her mother was diagnosed with cancer. Knowing how much she lover her parents and how important they were to her, and still deeply loving her, against my better judgment, I even offered to give her what she wanted, i.e. A child (a decision I immediately regretted btw) but she said no. She had moved on and didn't want to get back together.

Today, we met after a month so that i could give her some of her stuff back and we started talking and she informed me that she had "disengaged" from the relationship many months ago and she didn't want to get back but at the same time, she didn't want to move her thing out from our shared apartment since it would make the break up official.

I don't understand this. I thought we were officially broken up a month ago after she refused to accept my offer and after she told me that she basically didn't love me anymore but apparently that's not true.

I then asked her to arrange a date and move her things away since I believe the only way I can heal from this is by cutting contact and not be constantly reminded of her in this apartment.

She started crying when I said this and my heart broke to pieces. I still deeply love her but I know there's no going back and given her situation with her mother and the emotional pain she's going through, I feel like an absolute rear end in a top hat for asking her to finish things and cut contact.

I'm a grown man and I would call myself incredibly independent but I just can't stop crying feeling that I've done her injustice and I should allow her to move out (as in, take her things and cut contact) in her own time and when she's ready. At the same time, coming home, after 11 hours of work and commute, just to see her stuff everywhere hurts like hell. I'm torn between my selfishness in wanting to move on and her emotional well being.

Was I wrong to ask her to do this? Am I an absolute rear end in a top hat?

**tl;dr girlfriend broke up with me, moved out but left her stuff at our place. Now she refuses to take them away because doing so would make the break up "official".

HardDiskD posted:

She [31F] broke up with me [32M] after 11 years but won't take her stuff because it makes the break up "official"

I would just have called her with "Hey I packed your stuff and it's sitting neatly on my garage, come pick it up or else I'm going to throw it all on the garbage"

HardDiskD posted:

I'm (19F) really poo-shy around my boyfriend (20M) of 1.5 years

WampaLord posted:

The "buried the lede" story there is that to avoid breaking up, he promised her a baby, which thankfully she did not accept.

Holy gently caress would that be a disaster if she had said yes.

Jack Trades posted:

Open the faucet to mask the sounds. It's not hard to figure out, geez.

loquacius posted:

There's tons of political poo poo on the Internet which would make more sense and be less unsettling if it was being posted as a fetish thing, but really isn't


uhhh my post was primarily a rant about the evils of the diamond industry with a one-sentence blurb at the end, but ok

Cumslut1895 posted:

probably not? I'm sure most of them would end up in (far healthier) BDSM type relationships if they didn't exist.

quote:

What is the problem? (Don’t badmouth your SO!) I want this life so bad it hurts, but I don't think it's what he wants. When we met, he was your typical "alpha male" (from my perspective) to the point where he was very controlling and it took a toll on my mental health a bit. I loved him, stuck with him, he had some mental health issues/trust issues that were leading to these behaviors, and through time and many of his tests, he trusted me. We moved in together, he got me a ring and got down on one knee, he is no longer controlling, my emotional needs and trust issues have started to come out and he's been very responsive, patient, kind. This is great right? Why am I even complaining??? Well all I do is complain. I've been reading here, trying to reel things in a bit, keep things under control. It's hard.

Sometimes he acts wonderfully and controlling and dominant, and I love it, but I want someone to take the lead in life. I don't mean making every little decision for me. A lot of the time I'm guilty of asking him "permission" to do things. "May I turn on the television, will it bother you?" Or "may I take a shower, will you need the bathroom?" And it bothers him. He says he wants me to make my own decisions and not be dependent on him.

So I've been trying to meal-prep and cook more often lately- it's hard, I work full time, and he is a full time student and takes many of his classes online from home. I'm not resentful about that, we've agreed that when his schooling is done, I will not have to work. I wish that we could do that not, but of course it's not financially practical. So I made him dinner the other night, and he told me he felt weird. He's not used to being taken care of (he had a very neglectful upbringing) and he says it makes him feel guilty and like he's being babied, and that I don't have to do those things but I definitely can if I want to. Why can't HE want those things???? I only do them because he likes food so I want to give him food. I want him to get home from work and say "honey where's my dinner" but he doesn't even go to work. Which I'm not resentful about, he gets a lot of money from student aid to support us during the school year, but it does bother me that he sleeps all day, and stays up all night, and has stopped exercising and caring about things. He used to be this hyper-masculine dominant man and now he's just so "meh" towards everything in his life.

I've tried communicating to him (and I know he hates emotional talks, but this is important to me) that I honestly don't need him to micromanage and be like "ok make me food now" "now go wash up" etc. I just want to know he's in control of us bigger picture, and he told me he wants an equal partner who can take care of herself who doesn't depend on him for constant validation and reassurance. We had a big talk about it and I was struggling to even explain what "him being in control big picture" looks like. Because he's said countless times he's in control, but after our recent conversation I feel like he is just doing that for my sake.

How have you contributed to the problem? I am an awful person. I have borderline personality disorder, which I've completed therapy for, but some symptoms remain. So every stereotype of the overbearing, jealous, nagging, "honey can we talk about us?" wife is like ramped up times 10 with me. No wonder he has lost his control, I've taken it from him. I want to give it back and he doesn't even care to want it anymore. Also I talk A LOT he is very very introverted and I chatter constantly.

quote:

My [25/F] sister's [38/F] kid [10/M] found out I'm his real mother.

I know this is crazy. The title alone is so dramatic, I'm not even sure I believe it myself. But that's my life. When I was fifteen, I had sex for the first time with a guy I barely knew, and I ended up pregnant.

Instead of getting an abortion like most people would have in that situation, I decided to go through with the pregnancy and give the child to my sister who was newly married and 28 at the time. She couldn't have children of her own, and I knew she and her husband were desperate, so I did what I thought was best for everyone. The day I was released from the hospital, I started studying like crazy, got my high school diploma early, and got the hell out of that town. I've been living far away, on the opposite side of the country ever since. I went to university, I have a great job, a nice apartment, and a group of friends whom I adore. It's been ten years.

I've met my nephew twice. Once when he was born and once when I went back for a funeral. He was five then. There are times when I go on Facebook to see what he's up to. My sister routinely posts photos and keeps everyone informed. They celebrated my nephew's tenth birthday this past August. Marvel theme. He's a total nerd and I dig that. I wish nerds were cool when I was a kid; would have saved me from a ton of bullying. Anyway, I keep my distance. I have been feeling bouts of regret recently. Now that he's older and developing his own hobbies and interests, I see that we actually have a lot in common, and I'm left to wonder, what would have happened had I kept him? I know the answer. The father wasn't in the picture, I was far too young and immature, and I could barely take care of myself, let alone a human life. I attend therapy on a weekly basis, and we discuss these issues all the time. It's normal to feel this way. I would never act on these feelings, though. My sister and BIL decided that it was best for everyone involved if they keep the truth from their son. At least until he's older and able to process it. I've always respected their decision.

That said, about a week ago, I got an e-mail from my nephew (how does he even have an e-mail address at 10?) asking me if I'm his real mom. I immediately forwarded the e-mail to my sister, and she said she has no idea how he knows. Then later, she confessed that she and her husband have been arguing about whether they should tell their son the truth now, and maybe he overheard them. That's a terrible way to find out. Clearly. She said she would talk to him and figure this out as soon as possible, and she also told me not to reply to the e-mail. I haven't. The part that really scares me though is the way he ended e-mail. "Can I go live with you? They hate me here." My sister said that's just how kids talk and that my nephew knows how to manipulate adults into feeling sorry for him and doing what he wants.

That's a really strange way to talk about your kid IMO.

I guess my question is, what should I do? He knows. Regardless of whatever my sister tells him to cover it up or soothe the emotions he may be feeling, he knows. Also I don't know if I like the way she was just brushing off the ending of the e-mail. From a human standpoint. Not as his birth mother. If a child is acting out, it's a cry for help, not a manipulation tactic. I know because I used to be that child. I didn't end up pregnant at fifteen because my home life was great.

In any case, I don't really know what to do moving forward. Part of me wants to call our mom and ask what's going on, if there's anything I should know, but another part of me is telling me I should just mind my own business and stay out of it. Either way I won't be replying to that e-mail. I'm not ready for that can of worms.

TL;DR - My nephew e-mailed me asking if I'm his real mom and if he can come live with me because his parents hate him. I told my sister about the e-mail and she told me not to reply. She also guessed that my nephew may have overheard her and her husband arguing about whether they should tell him the truth now that's "old enough", and that's possibly how he found out. The way she brushed his concerns about being hated off, makes me wonder if there's something going on at home. I won't reply to the e-mail because I know that will only make whatever's happening worse, but I do want to know that my nephew's mental and emotional wellbeing isn't being brushed aside like mine was when I was around his age.

Gaunab posted:

Charles Get-Out posted:

Yeah reading a bit more it becomes apparent that a lot of this is thinly-veiled BDSM power exchange junk couched as a social philosophy.

I want this life and I don't think fiancé does

Like this woman. She wants to be a domestic sub and the actual answer to her problems is breaking off the engagement and getting a Fetlife account and a well-structured D/s arrangment, not fringe social theory.

Super fan of the standard format though (poo poo in italics), totally not weird.

Gaunab posted:

Seven Hundred Bee posted:

what's the proper way to offer someone a baby? 'would you like a baby?' 'im ok with impregnating you now, are you game?'

Gaunab posted:

quote:

step brother is 15

I snuck out to go to a party. I was returning home through the window at 3 in the morning. About my step brother, he can turn your face to ground beef if he wanted too. The guy has done Mauy Thai since a very young age. He's a real big fighting buff and has done MMA for 4 year now. He does Muay Thai and MMA

Next thing I know I feel a guy grab me from around my throat, pick me up and slam me to the ground. He flips me over and mounts me trapping my arms. He starts wailing on me every time I tried to speak he punched me in my face. He punched me 2 times and knocked me out.

I woke up and they called an ambulance for me. They took me to the ER for my broken Jaw. My step sisters were talking to their brother telling him it was not his fault. My step mother was more worried about her son. My father called me an idiot for breaking into the house at 3 am and for sneaking out. They saw the security footage from our home. He stopped as soon as I was knocked out. The footage shows him 'freaking out' when he turns the light on.

My parents are treating him like a hero and taking him out for dinner. Yet I'm sitting here with a broken jaw and black eye. I need advice

tl;dr: Step brother broke my jaw

kuddles posted:

I feel like if it's been 1.5 years, you really need to get over yourself using the bathroom with your partner nearby. It's like passing gas, of course you'll do everything to hide it when you start dating because you're in that weird mindset of trying to present an idealized version of yourself, but at a certain point you need to drop the illusion.

loquacius posted:

I agree with your read on the situation, but I think if she made it clear to her husband that she wants him to boss her around because it makes her her tingly in her happy zone rather than because it's what she philosophically thinks is logically correct, he might be less weirded out by it. Or more weirded out depending on how that goes. Either way I think she should try telling him that before breaking it off, because the worst-case result is that they break it off anyway.

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

All things considered, I think that lady is handling the situation pretty well. I mean, it might boil over into some crazy poo poo at some point, but no one looked exceptionally bad there given the circumstances.

WampaLord posted:

My [17M] broke into my own house after sneaking out. My step brother thought I was a intruder. He gave me a black eye and broke my jaw. My parents are treating him like a hero


All of the comments are saying step brother did the right thing.

WampaLord posted:

My [17M] broke into my own house after sneaking out. My step brother thought I was a intruder. He gave me a black eye and broke my jaw. My parents are treating him like a hero

All of the comments are saying step brother did the right thing.