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54 40 or gently caress posted:Is there anything that can actually improve chances of conceiving? My friend is trying pretty desperately and it's only been a few months but I know how bad she wants it to happen. She's tried acupuncture, different foods, positions etc but I don't have much in the way of help and I feel a bit guilty because it happened for us first try after getting my IUD. That said, she only came off the pill about a month ago and has PCOS Short answer: Inositol. It's the best. (It's why I'm pregnant right now after 5 years of trying!) Slightly longer answer: I was a 200 pound fatty-fat with PCOS. We'd had one kid without any interventions, and we were absolutely flummoxed as to why we were having such trouble conceiving a second one. We did the whole fertility clinic route - shots, pills, IUIs. Nothing worked. Finally, we gave up, figuring that if I could lose some weight, we'd try again. I counted calories and exercised and saw zero weight loss unless I was eating 1 tiny meal a day and running up and down a zillion stairs (which wasn't a good idea, trust me I already know). Then I started taking d-chiro-inositol. I went back to counting calories and exercising like a normal non-PCOS person would and holy poo poo it actually worked this time! Once I'd managed to drop 20 pounds, I was finally fertile again, and now I'm 20 weeks pregnant. (No fertility clinic required!) Here's a little bit of science for you: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17952759 It's not an instant fertility solution - it took us about six-ish months to see results in that area - but my average cycle length almost immediately dropped from 70+ days to around 30, which was huge. The best part is that you can get inositol powder for pretty cheap on Amazon, so if it doesn't work for you or gives you horns or something, you're only out fifteen bucks.
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Nov 5, 2016 03:22
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My midwife told me the 'wrong' due date on Wednesday? She said I was 17+4 but my expected due date is April 7th so that would put me at 19 weeks. Do I correct her next time? That said, I'm starting to feel some little motions, no definitive kicks yet and I have my anatomy scan next Friday. Here's hoping lil sprout cooperates. I finally saw my husbands list of girl names and so many of them are adorable, but I had to tell him hard no on one of them because it's my best friends girl name choice and you just don't do that.
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Nov 5, 2016 03:26
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Edit to add quote from previous page:Dogfish posted:Your baby's head is probably wayyyyyyy up in your vagina if you're not in labour. Unless your finger was up in there as far as it goes, it probably wasn't your baby's head. Unless you felt hair. In which case, um, get thee to L&D today lol. I remember in labour my midwife getting me to touch Harvey's head before she crowned...it felt so warm and squidgy. And the softest hair ever. It was so weird touching down there and it being someone else rather than part of me, considering it's such an intimate sensitive area. Giving birth is weird. nyerf fucked around with this message at 04:16 on Nov 5, 2016 |
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Nov 5, 2016 04:14
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huh maybe it wasn't then, IDK. I'm in so much pain atm due to the pressure on my hips. I am probably delirious. *Pictorial representation of how I feel right now* 
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Nov 5, 2016 08:22
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Lol I remember my doctor asking me that and me being like "wtf NO!!" And the whole room laughing.
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Nov 5, 2016 08:23
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My 1 hour GTT destroyed my stomach. The drink was awful and I felt a bit nauseous but otherwise ok (I don't know if that's a good sign I passed or not). I ate quiche and had a nap and a good 8 hours after the test I started feeling like my stomach was full of razor blades. Followed by terrible diarrhoea  it settled down but now it's 5am the next day and it still hurts like crap. Wtf glucose drink.
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Nov 5, 2016 10:29
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Rurutia posted:Lol I remember my doctor asking me that and me being like "wtf NO!!" And the whole room laughing. They asked me that with my second too. I was rage pushing and so angry, I had the same reaction. Like, gently caress NO, JUST GTFO BABY
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Nov 5, 2016 15:26
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I wanna feel the head as it's coming out! Well, that's how I feel now anyway...
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Nov 5, 2016 18:03
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Sharks Below posted:I wanna feel the head as it's coming out! Well, that's how I feel now anyway... Then do it! I did and it was incredible to feel my daughter's head for the first time as she crowned. At least for me pushing was fun. Once I was ready to push all my pain went away and I was pretty chill, so I just soaked up the excitement of seeing her soon. They even let me lift her onto my belly (I was going to catch her, but she slipped out too fast!)
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Nov 5, 2016 18:18
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I'd like to catch the baby too, I think that sounds cool. There's so much I never considered about birth plan preferences. I know some of them go out the door in the moment but there's definitely some preferences I have.
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Nov 5, 2016 18:54
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Birth plans are more about you figuring out what is important to you. Always understand that very bad things can happen and then all that should be on the plan is "living mother and baby." The difference, in my experience, between feeling things did not going according to plan (even the smoothest birth can surprise you) and being happy with how it went was more a matter of the mother feeling respected and trusting her care team. I didn't get to do everything on my birth plan that I wanted, but I discussed my Top Three Seriously Important Things that I wanted and said the rest was gravy. I then got those three things and when some things didn't happen I don't feel sad that they didn't because every time my midwife/OB/nurse would tell me why that wasn't appropriate and we'd change the plan. Next time I can catch my baby (hopefully)! Edit: Also, keep that poo poo to a page at most. I've been on the other side of L&D and no one is going to read your 6 page Birth Plan complete with placenta recipes. One page with bullet points, please. Eponymous Bosch fucked around with this message at 21:20 on Nov 5, 2016 |
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Nov 5, 2016 21:17
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I vaguely remember feeling my daughter's head as she was crowning, mostly because my doula said 'reach down you can feel it!' and I was pretty much doing whatever she said at that point. That's right around when the nurse went 'oh poo poo' because she had been faffing around or something and didn't call the OB fast enough. So the doula caught her but then basically tossed her onto my chest. Sort of like catching her myself?
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Nov 5, 2016 21:38
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The worst-kept secret in obstetrics is that when everything's going well, a moderately intelligent monkey could catch a baby. Skilled birth attendants aren't there for when things are working right- we're there just in case they go wrong and you DO need medical expertise. We're like lifeguards; most of our job is just sitting around in case something goes wrong.Eponymous Bosch posted:Birth plans are more about you figuring out what is important to you. Always understand that very bad things can happen and then all that should be on the plan is "living mother and baby." The difference, in my experience, between feeling things did not going according to plan (even the smoothest birth can surprise you) and being happy with how it went was more a matter of the mother feeling respected and trusting her care team. I didn't get to do everything on my birth plan that I wanted, but I discussed my Top Three Seriously Important Things that I wanted and said the rest was gravy. This is great advice. I usually ask my patients to come up with "birth preferences" for me: we usually list the top three things that they really would like to have happen unless it's truly impossible, and the top three things they absolutely don't want unless it's to immediately save their life or their baby's life. 54 40 or gently caress posted:My midwife told me the 'wrong' due date on Wednesday? She said I was 17+4 but my expected due date is April 7th so that would put me at 19 weeks. Do I correct her next time? If you're due April 7th you were indeed 17+4 on Wednesday. That being said, if you think your midwife has your gestational age calculated wrong another time, always better to double-check. She won't mind; happens all the time.
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Nov 5, 2016 22:09
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It is definitely a good idea to remind yourself that your birth plan can very quickly go out the window and to prep yourself accordingly. When my wife gave birth 5 weeks ago the umbilical cord was over our son's shoulder so had to get cut prematurely. Then as soon as he was out he was having trouble breathing so there was no skin to skin for about 15 minutes. Fortunately my wife had a very good attitude towards the rapid change of plans and still really enjoyed the birthing process.
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Nov 5, 2016 22:42
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We had a two page preference list that we knew would be worth less than toilet paper if any of the obstetricians in the hospital had to come near me. Thank god for a decent midwife, so best thing I'd chime in on is to have a decent relationship with your care provider the end.
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Nov 5, 2016 23:25
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Dogfish posted:The worst-kept secret in obstetrics is that when everything's going well, a moderately intelligent monkey could catch a baby. Skilled birth attendants aren't there for when things are working right- we're there just in case they go wrong and you DO need medical expertise. We're like lifeguards; most of our job is just sitting around in case something goes wrong. I don't have many preferences, I've seen a lot of people making visual birth preference plans too. Thankfully my midwife team is pretty awesome and helpful.
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Nov 5, 2016 23:56
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"Birth preferences" is what we're doing too. I worry that plan is very restrictive, and as I'm a person who likes to be in control, I'm trying not to do anything that will encourage me to be like that during a process that is largely out of my control. Not that I don't think I'll have any control but I figure a short set of preferences with lots of room for flexibility will make any changes to the "plan" less of a "failure" if that makes sense. ETA: Also I have an awesome, low-intervention focused team of excellent midwives and OBs at my hospital whose values align almost completely with mine (in fact so far entirely) so I'm not worried about having to advocate too hard for myself.
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Nov 6, 2016 03:45
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A doula is also a wonderful investment if you want a low intervention birth. I absolutely loved mine and she was essential to keeping me focused during the most intense parts of labor. They are really helpful to your partner too, because men can just lose their poo poo when they see you in childbirth (except if they're an OB/nurse/etc) and even if they don't lose their poo poo sometimes they want to eat or go to the bathroom. It was nice to have someone there the whole time without emotional baggage, a lot of tricks for comfort, and had seen it hundreds of times before. She wasn't even particularly crunchy and we talked about deferring to my midwives medical expertise. Also, pregnancy has a ton of resources that explain every little pang of nausea but postpartum is another beast entirely. I could call her up and ask my thousand questions about all the strange postpartum changes that no one talks about, which saved me many calls and trips to the midwives.
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Nov 6, 2016 15:39
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I have one! And so far she sounds a lot like yours - not particularly crunchy (which was important to me as I'm not all that crunchy either), just there to help me stay focused on my goals and to keep my husband from falling apart. Your post made me really glad I forked over the cash 
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Nov 6, 2016 16:26
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I'll tack on another shoutout for doulas from the husband perspective. Our hospital had an in house doula program which worked great, for a very low cost they called her in once my wife started getting contractions (she was induced). Once she got there she was just an ocean of calm support for both my wife and me. She was adamant about making sure i left to eat a few times over the 20 hour labor, helped keep my wife's parents informed of progress, and and most importantly kept my wife focused and as calm as could be expected. For me it was a huge relief to know that someone who actually knew what was going on was there to support my wife as I honestly felt pretty clueless most of the time. Also our L&D ward was slammed the night my wife gave birth, so the nurses were stretched really thin. However since the doula was part of the hospital staff she was able to keep getting my wife whatever she needed without us having to bother the very busy nurses.
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Nov 6, 2016 16:57
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I love it when my patients hire doulas for the same reason I love it when my patients take their medication as prescribed: it improves outcomes. Even if you don't want a low-intervention birth, there's a lot they can do that's very helpful. They do an amazing job helping people feel better and also helping birth work better and be safer. I've hired mine, and my birth will be a high-intervention, high-risk nonsense factory. Also if cost is a factor lots of places have a volunteer doula of volunteer birth companion program where you can access those services for free or for low cost, and many doulas will charge on a sliding scale. They're amazing.Eponymous Bosch posted:They are really helpful to your partner too, because men can just lose their poo poo when they see you in childbirth (except if they're an OB/nurse/etc) Even if they are, man, even if they are. Maybe especially if they are. No matter how many babies you've delivered nothing prepares you for it being someone you love. I delivered my niece because I was like "Oh yeah no problem it'll be the same as any other birth" and it WAS NOT. I actually think it's worse for those of us who work in obstetrics because we've seen all the scary stuff and no matter how much you know the odds are in favour of everything going well, when it's somebody you love it's so hard not to send you brain to that place of "OH GOD EVERYTHING WILL BE A DISASTER AAAAAA" I even find I have to be really careful of that tendency for myself; every time I have a twinge or something I like "Oh my God remember that gal who had a sudden unexplained seizure? Didn't she say she had felt a weird twinge earlier that day? Maybe I should go to emerg just in case!" The more you know, the crazier it makes you, haha! 54 40 or gently caress posted:Really? I'm so confused! I had been given the April 7th due date and then there was some calculator I found where you input the due date and it shows you how many weeks you are, when heartbeat can be seen on ultrasound etc. Oh well, no biggie. A bunch of the calculators on the internet are kind of crappy. Count it backward on a calendar, where April 7th is 40 weeks, and you'll see.
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Nov 6, 2016 18:47
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Dogfish posted:I actually think it's worse for those of us who work in obstetrics because we've seen all the scary stuff and no matter how much you know the odds are in favour of everything going well, when it's somebody you love it's so hard not to send you brain to that place of "OH GOD EVERYTHING WILL BE A DISASTER AAAAAA" Oh my god yes. My birth class instructor asked my group what our top fears about labor and birth were and without missing beat I said a rare but horrific complication Everyone else said pooping, c-section, to loving the baby at first sight, etc. Literally all the nightmare scenarios went through my head, which I would then call my doula and she would talk me down. See! Another reason to hire a doula! And when I did have a significant postpartum complication she held my hand and reassured me and kept me calm when I needed to focus. She even stayed with my husband while I went to the OR, helped him do skin-to-skin, and talked to him while I was getting repaired. Then she basically latched my daughter on to me and made sure we started breastfeeding asap since it was really important to me. I cannot say nice enough things about her and how she made all the difference in my birth experience. Edit: OB/Gyns and L&D nurses are bad rear end and they don't get enough credit for the work they do. Especially since many people talk poo poo about OBs, but when bad things happen they dive right in and will do anything to save their patients. Thank you Dogfish for your hard work (and terrible terrible hours)! Eponymous Bosch fucked around with this message at 20:29 on Nov 6, 2016 |
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Nov 6, 2016 19:55
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I've never had a good experience with an OB, though I suspect it's only because of the standard you get out here in the sticks. The only interaction I had with one was sadly for two small perineal stitches, which were *still* botched, so thank god we didn't need a section. Our doula was great and I'll definitely recommend ours to anyone. I didn't even notice she was there during the final stages, and earlier she helped me put my pants on to get in the car to get to the hospital. I dunno why but it was like the most tender lucid moment I remember before baby was out.
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Nov 7, 2016 00:32
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Gahhhh I feel like I have a uti. Unfortunately I have a history of often feeling like I have a uti (pain, spasms etc) but not actually having an infection (some docs think it's interstitial cystitis, mostly we have no idea). Usually I'd just take pyridium and it'd go away in a day or so. Now I don't know. I've already had one uti scare early on which wasn't an infection. I know the risk of preterm labour with one too. But it's likely just my usual issue for which I'd just take pyridium and drink a ton of water (the latter I am obviously doing anyway). Still feel like my body is revolting against me after the glucose test. Ughhh halp.
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Nov 7, 2016 00:37
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Miranda posted:Gahhhh I feel like I have a uti. Unfortunately I have a history of often feeling like I have a uti (pain, spasms etc) but not actually having an infection (some docs think it's interstitial cystitis, mostly we have no idea). Usually I'd just take pyridium and it'd go away in a day or so. Now I don't know. I've already had one uti scare early on which wasn't an infection. I know the risk of preterm labour with one too. But it's likely just my usual issue for which I'd just take pyridium and drink a ton of water (the latter I am obviously doing anyway). Still feel like my body is revolting against me after the glucose test. Ughhh halp. Go to the doctor and pee in a cup. It's a small price to pay for peace of mind.
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Nov 7, 2016 01:47
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Seriously, UTIs while pregnant are nothing to screw around with! I think they even sell OTC tests for it now too, at the pharmacy. No idea how accurate they are, though.
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Nov 7, 2016 02:16
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Miranda posted:Gahhhh I feel like I have a uti. Unfortunately I have a history of often feeling like I have a uti (pain, spasms etc) but not actually having an infection (some docs think it's interstitial cystitis, mostly we have no idea). Usually I'd just take pyridium and it'd go away in a day or so. Now I don't know. I've already had one uti scare early on which wasn't an infection. I know the risk of preterm labour with one too. But it's likely just my usual issue for which I'd just take pyridium and drink a ton of water (the latter I am obviously doing anyway). Still feel like my body is revolting against me after the glucose test. Ughhh halp. Have you ever seen a pelvic floor physiotherapist? I've had a couple patients with the same issue, which unfortunately worsened in pregnancy. They all turned out to have hypertonic pelvic floors, and when treated by a physio got way better both during and after pregnancy. Some people also get venous congestion in the vulva during pregnancy that causes irritation that can mimic urethral irritation. That UTI feeling is so miserable! Poor you. You definitely do want to rule out infection, as I know you know, not only because of the PTL risk but it's surprisingly easy to get pyelonephritis when you're pregnant thanks to progesterone dilating the ureters. Why not swipe a Multistix from work and pee on it? If the dip is suspicious for UTI, go to a walk-in and get antibiotics. Pyridium's not available in Canada so I don't know if you can take it in pregnancy. Eponymous Bosch posted:Thank you Dogfish for your hard work (and terrible terrible hours)! Back at you! The hours are indeed crap, but it's such a great job that I always feel like I'm just whining when I groan about getting up at 3 am. Wouldn't do anything else. Being on sick leave is HORRIBLE. I felt like I was abandoning my patients and also I just miss going to work. Watching Netflix and feeling like I have a permanent flu is definitely no substitute for convincing babies to be born.
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Nov 7, 2016 03:27
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Miranda posted:Gahhhh I feel like I have a uti. Unfortunately I have a history of often feeling like I have a uti (pain, spasms etc) but not actually having an infection (some docs think it's interstitial cystitis, mostly we have no idea). Usually I'd just take pyridium and it'd go away in a day or so. Now I don't know. I've already had one uti scare early on which wasn't an infection. I know the risk of preterm labour with one too. But it's likely just my usual issue for which I'd just take pyridium and drink a ton of water (the latter I am obviously doing anyway). Still feel like my body is revolting against me after the glucose test. Ughhh halp. I'm hoping I can avoid one but man. I'm just going to drink all the cranberry juice on hopes that it'll help. It doesn't help that I've had increasingly bad pain in my groin joints? Like it needs to be popped really badly. I'm nervous since I'm so short and already top heavy with my chest that my lower back, hips and pelvis are going to just get progressively worse. Hopefully I can at least make it to 30 weeks before if I need to consider short term sick leave.
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Nov 7, 2016 03:45
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54 40 or gently caress posted:I'm hoping I can avoid one but man. I'm just going to drink all the cranberry juice on hopes that it'll help. It doesn't help that I've had increasingly bad pain in my groin joints? Like it needs to be popped really badly. I'm nervous since I'm so short and already top heavy with my chest that my lower back, hips and pelvis are going to just get progressively worse. Hopefully I can at least make it to 30 weeks before if I need to consider short term sick leave. Get a pelvic support belt! Also called belly belts, maternity belts, v-belts (the ones that look like an aerial harness), or hip braces. If you're getting lower back and pelvic pain, now is the time to introduce structural support and also to pay really close attention to your positioning and ergonomics. When your ligaments loosen, the muscles in your pelvic floor, butt, hips, back, and legs have to tighten up to stabilize your pelvis. The more stable you can keep those pelvic bones (by bracing them with one of the aforementioned devices, but also by watching your pelvic positioning), the less that muscle tension will increase, and the less pain you'll have. In terms of positioning, remember that any time you move one leg and not the other, you're tilting your pelvis out of whack and causing that tension. So don't cross your legs or sit with your legs wide apart, try to move both legs together when you turn over in bed, and sleep with a pillow between your knees. Basically you want to keep your hips in line with your knees in line with your toes as much as possible.
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Nov 7, 2016 03:50
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Oh great! I've been thinking of picking up one of those support belts too so I will get on that.
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Nov 7, 2016 03:51
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Please go in and have yourself checked if you think you may be getting a UTI. I thought I was getting one, symptoms went away, then I was hospitalized for 2 days at 28 weeks for a kidney infection that moved up from the untreated UTI. It's worth it to just go get tested.
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Nov 7, 2016 03:54
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Yeah, that's the plan for my doctors appointment Wednesday. if I wasn't travelling for work Monday and Tuesday I'd just go tomorrow. I have to get a note, which will cost money, asking for discretion sick time if needed since the note from my midwife wasn't good enough for work, despite the fact that they're my primary caregivers. We have kind of a weird policy where you only get threw absences in the span of six months before getting a letter on your file. Originally it was for my headaches in first tri but I think it'll be good to have I'm case they come back.
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Nov 7, 2016 03:59
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When they rewrote I think it was the Employment Standards Act they made a list of caregivers who can write absence notes from work and midwives weren't included in that because, the theory goes, midwives manage normal pregnancies and if your pregnancy is normal you should be able to work. If there's enough not-normal that you can't work, you should see a doctor. That this approach misses significant nuance in the lives of real people should be immediately obvious, so I get to waste the taxpayer's money (and sometimes my patients' money, if their doctors are sensible sorts who charge for non-essential services like work notes for bullshit HR/insurance rules) by sending my patients to see their family doctors for a note that says "Sarah Jane's back hurts a lot because she's pregnant; she can't do her job at the anvil-lifting factory right now but will be able to again once she's not hauling a whole human being around in her torso." Some private insurers do accept notes from midwives, as do many HR departments for their internal leave processes, but the government and most of the major insurers don't, for that reason. (Manulife in particular are especial dicks about it.) (We're also only paid 52% of what our work is worth and receive no compensation for being on call but that's fine because we're [mostly] ladies, and all ladies really want to do is help people and be lovely and kind so it's no trouble at all for us. It's in our natures, so why would we need a financial incentive? I do love my job and I do mostly want to help people and be lovely and kind; I just also want to be paid commensurately with what that's worth.)
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Nov 7, 2016 04:07
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I wonder if that will ever change, particularly in places where seeing a midwife is free and can prescribe certain things. I can understand and value the reasoning from a business perspective but from a pregnant lady perspective? Hooo nope.
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Nov 7, 2016 04:25
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I could write a literal book on all the social, political, and financial factors that influence the current status of midwifery practice in Ontario, but I won't, because that would be very boring to most of the people in this thread. The short version is that as long as institutional and cultural sexism is a thing, pregnancy care in general and midwifery care in particular will face significant funding and logistical challenges. I am hopeful that if the Association of Ontario Midwives wins our pay equity suit against the government, we'll see some effects beyond remuneration, but ultimately the entire way maternity care is delivered in Ontario is way overdue for an overhaul (and there are councils and committees set up at the provincial level that are addressing this). I'm hopeful that pregnancy care here will look very different in 10 years. Not that we don't do a pretty good job now! But we could be doing way better, both for our patients and for the taxpayer.
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Nov 7, 2016 04:33
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Midwifery deserves so much more respect, especially in Ontario since our family doctor situation is so dire. Takes a tremendous strain off family doctors, while providing an environment focused entirely on pregnancy and therefore giving a much more supportive and well-rounded environment for women who are expecting, not that i need to tell you that! Seriously, could not praise the practice enough. My doctor was glad as well when I told her I was going to be seeing a midwife she was like "great! Unless there's any compilations, I'll see you at the end of your pregnancy."
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Nov 7, 2016 04:38
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Non obgyn docs won't do anything for pregnant women here. If you catch a cold or anything short of a car crash you have to see the obgyn first. Dentists won't use local anaesthetic. I couldn't even get my pits lasered in the one period of my life I had both free time and money But you can walk into a clinic for same-day appointments and get 3d sonograms with printouts at least once a month so, still winning. peanut fucked around with this message at 07:34 on Nov 7, 2016 |
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Nov 7, 2016 07:32
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I'm now 10 days overdue. Please goons send me and this baby some 'GTFO of my womb' vibes please!!!!!
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Nov 7, 2016 08:59
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peanut posted:Non obgyn docs won't do anything for pregnant women here. If you catch a cold or anything short of a car crash you have to see the obgyn first. Dentists won't use local anaesthetic. I couldn't even get my pits lasered in the one period of my life I had both free time and money This is awful and misogynistic. Just because you're pregnant doesn't mean you cease to exist as a person who can have treatable illness unrelated to the pregnancy.
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Nov 7, 2016 10:15
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Rondette posted:I'm now 10 days overdue. Please goons send me and this baby some 'GTFO of my womb' vibes please!!!!! Sending! I'm sure you've heard it all, but sex with the goal of semen hitting the cervix has evidence to help. Evening primrose oil also and if all else fails (talk to your healthcare provider first of course) castor oil, and the Miles Circuit to get baby's head in the best position for birth. http://www.milescircuit.com/the-circuit.html I was in our shoes and it sucked rear end. I hated every woman who just went into labor early/on their due date/before me. The baby will come out eventually! Late babies are the best babies!
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Nov 7, 2016 17:48
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