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Real Name Grover posted:Unfortunately that won't stop idiots across the country from clamoring for him to save their program Julie Hermann's plan three years ago if the boosters hadn't refused to give her a dime were either Bob Diaco or somehow, Jim Tressel. It's a really good thing that didn't happen although keeping Flood for two more years was just as bad.
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Nov 29, 2016 03:54
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I want scientists to invent a 24/7 feed into the back of my head like in The Matrix, but instead of a computer generated facsimile of 20th century Earth it only pumps Coach O's unintelligible press conferences for the next three years directly to my brain.
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Nov 29, 2016 03:58
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Coach O Playbook Chapter 1: Recruitin' Me and ol' Slinky were diggin' around near the ol' abandoned shack over there and I said to him Slinky we can't go there, we was told not to go there by my maw, she said eddie i don't care if you're the size of Driskill Mountain because you are a big boy there, but you stay 'way from that shack, eddie, that's not for you, but Slinky wouldn't hear it he just said to me you know what's in that shack, probably a bunch of dead ol' alligators or a rusted out airboat engine which wasn't fair because he knew i was collectin' 'em, i had dozens of airboat motors rustin' all over the lawn and paw would come by and say ed you get those cleaned up outta here now or i'll whup up on you in that hamburger drill and there won't be no coach telling me he needs you next saturday do you hear me boy, so i said fine we can take a little peek over there, the metal had warped and rusted over the years and there was a curled up corner and i tried to get into it but it cut up my back pretty bad, like a metal nettle just carvin' it up, bleedin' all through the shirt and i said slinky you dumb ol' bastard i'm gonna get whupped up real good, my mom's gonna get the wadin' boots and but i didn't hear anything from him, slink i said, slink you dumb possum quit messin' around in there but i didn't hear nothin' more and i couldn't get in the shack because i was too big and i said slink i'm too huge
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Nov 29, 2016 04:15
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what did i just read
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Nov 29, 2016 04:23
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R.D. Mangles posted:Coach O Playbook I had to stop reading twice because I was laughing so hard. Is that from something?
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Nov 29, 2016 04:27
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Joey Freshwater posted:I had to stop reading twice because I was laughing so hard. i stole the concept from this http://www.theonion.com/blogpost/ask-a-faulknerian-idiot-man-child-12248
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Nov 29, 2016 04:28
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Oregon247 says Florida’s McElwain is a target for them to replace Helfrich
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Nov 29, 2016 04:30
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pillsburysoldier posted:Oregon247 says Florida’s McElwain is a target for them to replace Helfrich That's stupid for a number of reasons. MourningView posted:Even with the extension I think he should be pretty high on Oregon's list, assuming he'd be willing/able to find a good OC. They're probably gonna look for someone with HC experience though. I don't expect him to go anywhere this offseason, but he's gone within a couple of years unless Orgeron gets fired and he gets promoted. Or if his defenses suddenly turn to garbage I guess.
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Nov 29, 2016 04:37
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R.D. Mangles posted:i stole the concept from this It's a shame The Onion stopped doing these. "Ask an Elderly Black Woman as Written by a Sophomore Creative Writing Major" is my favorite.
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Nov 29, 2016 04:37
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pillsburysoldier posted:Oregon247 says Florida’s McElwain is a target for them to replace Helfrich  gently caress it, man
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Nov 29, 2016 04:37
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R.D. Mangles posted:Coach O Playbook 
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Nov 29, 2016 04:45
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pillsburysoldier posted:Oregon247 says Florida’s McElwain is a target for them to replace Helfrich Uhhh.. what
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Nov 29, 2016 04:52
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'A Target' meaning someone they want, who will turn them down.
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Nov 29, 2016 04:52
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R.D. Mangles posted:Coach O Playbook holy poo poo lol
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Nov 29, 2016 04:55
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Regnevelc posted:'A Target' meaning someone they want, who will turn them down. I can't decide if I'd be sad he left. Not sure who we'd go after though.
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Nov 29, 2016 05:01
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LeeMajors posted:I can't decide if I'd be sad he left. Morris or Fleck maybe? Bring Sprudog out of retirement for a year or so until a real good candidate pops up? Charlie Strong?
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Nov 29, 2016 05:08
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swickles posted:Morris or Fleck maybe? Bring Sprudog out of retirement for a year or so until a real good candidate pops up? Charlie Strong? I don't know anything anymore. I feel like the coaching pool is weak. Strong? Morris would be in over his head I think. Throw cash at Holgo? His riverboat offense fits the bill. I was so hopeful for Mac, and maybe he really is just a QB away from making it happen--but goddamn, that offense is a dog. Like a dog with fleas. And AIDS.
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Nov 29, 2016 05:09
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I'm just so happy Ed Orgeron is the head coach of LSU. I'm not super invested in the team but I hope he sticks around a long time because personality-wise, I can't imagine a better coach-program combo than Ed Orgeron at LSU.
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Nov 29, 2016 05:14
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LeeMajors posted:I don't know anything anymore. I feel like the coaching pool is weak. Strong? Morris would be in over his head I think. Throw cash at Holgo? His riverboat offense fits the bill. I think people are underestimating how much of a mess that side of the ball was when Muschamp left. Remember last year Florida only had 5 scholarship OL. Even if you recruit that heavily, you are looking at true freshmen to shore it up, which is probably the position that is hardest for an 18 year old kid to step into. Hell, it usually takes two years just to get them up to proper weight. There are some good players, but absolutely no depth and of course the ongoing QB struggles. I think next year you should at least see the line being better at the run game and hopefully a good QB comes along.
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Nov 29, 2016 05:21
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Who is is this Derek P guy?
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Nov 29, 2016 05:25
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swickles posted:I think people are underestimating how much of a mess that side of the ball was when Muschamp left. Remember last year Florida only had 5 scholarship OL. Even if you recruit that heavily, you are looking at true freshmen to shore it up, which is probably the position that is hardest for an 18 year old kid to step into. Hell, it usually takes two years just to get them up to proper weight. There are some good players, but absolutely no depth and of course the ongoing QB struggles. I think next year you should at least see the line being better at the run game and hopefully a good QB comes along. Conversely there will be no defense to bail them out so we will found out in a hurry. I get that the offense was a mess. I've watched it in excruciating and agonizing detail for like 6 years. But it is pretty incredible to watch guys walk into godawful garbage heap situations elsewhere and put together a working offense. UF has regressed since last year (incredibly, I might add) from the TREON HARRIS EXPERIENCE. I'm nauseated typing it. But anyways, I'm sure I'm being impatient and he'll leave and I'll be cool with it and he'll roll up multiple titles with UO like the Cam Newton of coaches and I'll be sick about it and the cycle will continue.
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Nov 29, 2016 05:25
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Nissin Cup Nudist posted:Who is is this Derek P guy? "Special Assistant to the Head Coach" apparently. 
Pakled fucked around with this message at 05:45 on Nov 29, 2016 |
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Nov 29, 2016 05:40
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I'm gobsmacked as to how Florida can go from one of the most exciting offenses in the country with guys like Tebow and Harvin, to the unwatchable garbage it is now. That can't all be coaching, can it? Did they lose the state's top dynamic playmaker recruits to FSU or something?
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Nov 29, 2016 05:40
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Benne posted:I'm gobsmacked as to how Florida can go from one of the most exciting offenses in the country with guys like Tebow and Harvin, to the unwatchable garbage it is now. Dalvin Cook was committed to UF for over a year then switched to FSU either the week before or on Signing Day. One of many spectacular offensive recruiting whiffs by Muschamp. He also left us with 6 scholarship OL--so few that we couldn't have a spring game last year. But yeah, even so its a goddamned shitshow--even against our FCS cupcakes we look bad on O.
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Nov 29, 2016 05:44
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pillsburysoldier posted:Oregon247 says Florida’s McElwain is a target for them to replace Helfrich Lane Kiffin to Florida. Charlie Strong named new DC.
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Nov 29, 2016 06:09
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LLCoolJD posted:Lane Kiffin to Florida. Charlie Strong named new DC. Oh jesus gently caress Lane
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Nov 29, 2016 06:13
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LeeMajors posted:Oh jesus gently caress Lane it's time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYAsxnRaTAg
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Nov 29, 2016 06:16
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Florida hiring Kiffin or Strong fresh off him bombing at Texas would be an Extremely SEC Move. I don't really get people's infatuation with Morris either. I get he was a good OC and SMU isn't a great job but so far he's been significantly worse than June Jones was there. Baylor is kind of a beggers can't be choosers thing I guess but otherwise it makes no sense. maybe wait until he actually wins something
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Nov 29, 2016 06:21
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MourningView posted:Florida hiring Kiffin or Strong fresh off him bombing at Texas would be an Extremely SEC Move. Rumor is that he turned Baylor down. He wanted $4.9 million, Baylor didn't offer as much. Apparently the biggest reason why Kingsbury is coaching at Tech instead of Morris is that he asked for more money beyond what we would pay him... for his assistants.
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Nov 29, 2016 06:31
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MourningView posted:Florida hiring Kiffin or Strong fresh off him bombing at Texas would be an Extremely SEC Move. If Mac somehow leaves for Oregon, Lane is the logical conclusion to this lovely decade of UF football
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Nov 29, 2016 06:32
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Not that I think he'd be anyone's first choices for the jobs we're currently discussing, but is the shine completely off of Matt Rhule? I remember it was rumored Mizzou wanted him last year (and I believe it) and couldn't get him. Just seems like his name hasn't come up much in this thread.
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Nov 29, 2016 06:40
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Grittybeard posted:Not that I think he'd be anyone's first choices for the jobs we're currently discussing, but is the shine completely off of Matt Rhule? I remember it was rumored Mizzou wanted him last year (and I believe it) and couldn't get him. Temple looked bad early this year which I think took him off a lot of people's radar but they've been really good the last few months. And Fleck became the hot new mid major name dejour so he's gonna get mentioned first until someone hires him. Some of it is also regional, Rhule would probably come up more if there was a G5 job in the Northeast open since that's where he's spent most of his career (if Penn State hadn't exploded down the stretch he'd definitely be on their list to replace Franklin, I think). Maybe if Adazzio gets canned at BC or something. So far most of the hot seat talk has been in Texas or the south and Texas in particular has become super insular in terms of looking for people with connections to the area who run a particular style of offense, which I guess is how you get Chad Morris' name coming up even though he's never even finished .500 MourningView fucked around with this message at 07:02 on Nov 29, 2016 |
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Nov 29, 2016 06:56
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DJExile posted:The noise around Tress has actually been pretty much non-existent. He took the show-cause in stride and seems to be pretty content as YSU's president. Obviously not a bad gig by any means but he's shown zero interest in doing anything outside of it. How in the gently caress does a football coach become president of the university? Don't you normally have to work your way up through the academic world for that? This university was just like "hey dat dere guy was good at coaching football. less maik him precedent"?
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Nov 29, 2016 07:25
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DrunkPanda posted:How in the gently caress does a football coach become president of the university? Don't you normally have to work your way up through the academic world for that? This university was just like "hey dat dere guy was good at coaching football. less maik him precedent"? I am not sure how out of the ordinary it is, Mitch Daniels is president of Purdue based solely on him being Governor.
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Nov 29, 2016 07:29
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DrunkPanda posted:How in the gently caress does a football coach become president of the university? Don't you normally have to work your way up through the academic world for that? This university was just like "hey dat dere guy was good at coaching football. less maik him precedent"? Didn''t the president of Mizzou go there for like undergrad and then his (computer) work pushed him to Harvard for a MBA? Then he ruined a bunch of things for no reason other than being a corporate hack? I mean, I know why be won - he had a plan to make the students more employable to shifting into computer science/engineering focus with input from tech companies and also he was a shill. But a hefty majority of a president's job is to beg for money.
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Nov 29, 2016 07:42
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I'm actually a bit surprised that I haven't heard more smoke about Washington's coordinators being poached. OC Jonathan Smith has a smartly balanced offensive gameplan that accentuates everyone's strengths while hiding their weaknesses, and DC Pete Kwiatkowski still has the defense playing at a high level even after losing his best pass rusher and best LB to injury. This Huskies squad is arguably not a playoff team on paper, but they've been coached up exceptionally well. Yeah, a lot of that goes to Petersen, but it's a bit strange that his coordinators don't get more shine. Benne fucked around with this message at 08:29 on Nov 29, 2016 |
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Nov 29, 2016 08:27
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I wonder if having a new AD would be motivation for Mac to leave...
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Nov 29, 2016 13:05
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R.D. Mangles posted:Coach O Playbook Why does Coach O know what a mountain is? Why would he specifically know about a place called Driskill mountain? Let me present to you the terrain of the part of Louisiana that DACOACHO comes from: -------------------------------------------water-----------------------------------------------
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Nov 29, 2016 13:09
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Benne posted:I'm actually a bit surprised that I haven't heard more smoke about Washington's coordinators being poached. OC Jonathan Smith has a smartly balanced offensive gameplan that accentuates everyone's strengths while hiding their weaknesses, and DC Pete Kwiatkowski still has the defense playing at a high level even after losing his best pass rusher and best LB to injury.
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Nov 29, 2016 13:37
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Eltoasto posted:I am not sure how out of the ordinary it is, Mitch Daniels is president of Purdue based solely on him being Governor. I don't think his value is boiled down solely to his eight years as governor. He was a business exec and was Bush's budget director until things flew off the rails with the Iraq invasion. Big universities are starting to recognize that academics aren't always the best leaders.
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