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  • Locked thread
EagerSleeper
Feb 3, 2010

by R. Guyovich

POOL IS CLOSED posted:

This doesn't eliminate someone's chimpanzee theory.

It actually does. If Beatrice were any number of chimpanzees, she'd be an excellent climber and hence would not have fallen to her death. Chimpanzee theory: disproven.



:chanpop: Beautiful... mods, please make this my avatar.

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POOL IS CLOSED
Jul 14, 2011

I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.
Pillbug

EagerSleeper posted:

It actually does. If Beatrice were any number of chimpanzees, she'd be an excellent climber and hence would not have fallen to her death. Chimpanzee theory: disproven.

hmm, i didn't look at it this way...

but what if, once freed from her cage of flesh, Beatrice was able to summon x chimpanzees to Rokkenjima, and use them as furniture to do her bidding?

AfroSquirrel
Sep 3, 2011

EagerSleeper posted:

It actually does. If Beatrice were any number of chimpanzees, she'd be an excellent climber and hence would not have fallen to her death. Chimpanzee theory: disproven.

Beatrice's Hempel's Raven then means that anyone who does not fall to their death must be a chimpanzee. Therefore, all the Ushiromiyas are chimps. In order to find the witch, we must separate the monkeys from the apes!

Quinn2win
Nov 9, 2011

Foolish child of man...
After reading all this,
do you still not understand?
Video added at last: The Witch's Flight.

resurgam40
Jul 22, 2007

Battler, the literal stupidest man on earth. Why are you even here, Battler, why did you come back to this place so you could fuck literally everything up?

I can't really decide if I should praise or condemn you for this video title, but... drat, that is really, really different from the Beatrice we know, isn't it? Poor girl just sounds so excited to meet someone that isn't an old man... :smith:

Quinn2win
Nov 9, 2011

Foolish child of man...
After reading all this,
do you still not understand?


October 5th, 1986, 12:00 AM



In his dimly lit study, occasionally brightened by lightning, Kinzo kept mumbling and laughing to himself. On the antique clock with the intricate design that had been sitting on his desk, the two overlapping hands tilted to the right and began to slide. The measure of time that counted up to 24... had returned to 0... and had begun to count back again...



BGM: Rose

But perhaps a person's life is the same. You live, aiming for a perfect 24, and in the instant you reach it, you return to 0. People will probably praise the departed, saying that he did reach 24, but he most certainly did not. In the end, he's a 0.

"I am different. I will live and reach 24. That itself is the Golden Land. For that is where Beatrice dwells."

Kinzo had been fumbling around with some tarot cards for some time. It looked as though he was trying to divine his own luck with a contest, doing it over every time he didn't like the result. The most forbidden action in tarot reading is trying to predict the same thing twice. To do so ridicules the results of fortune telling... and also desecrates those beings higher than humans that give revelations through the tarot cards.

However, Kinzo knew. Tarot cards shouldn't be used twice because... since they're nothing more than a random number generator, reading them twice will naturally cause a different result to appear. Therefore, reading them twice was only forbidden to preserve the mystique of the tarot cards' results. However, that didn't mean that Kinzo didn't take tarot reading seriously. Kinzo's interpretation of tarot reading was done in a completely different way. That was to repeat the reading, over and over, without giving up in the slightest, until he reached the result most favorable to him. The mark he set for this 'most favorable result' would vary, but when he demanded the most favorable result in a strictly literal sense, it was the same as a simple roulette of luck, where he seeked an arithmetic miracle.

...However, Kinzo used miracles of numbers as the basis of his magical power, so this functioned perfectly well as a magical ritual. In other words, until the result he desired appeared perfectly, he would strive to repeat the tarot readings over and over, with conviction, turning the feelings of his heart into prayers, so that when they reached the heavens, they would be sublimated into results. This was Kinzo's personal magical interpretation. Therefore, even though Kinzo's tarot cards were no different from those generally used, the way in which they were used was completely different...



Kinzo stopped his hands for a second. He seemed not to be getting the results he wanted. On the contrary, bad cards that shouldn't show up so often appeared repeatedly... and continued to interfere with the miracle Kinzo wished for.

"...Hmph. Is that how it is?"

Kinzo seemed to have received some revelation that was different from normal. But, judging by the unlucky cards scattered across his desk, it was difficult to imagine that the omen had been a good one...

For a while, Kinzo closed his eyes tightly, pondering something. Then, as the thunder roared, he made up his mind about something, took the telephone receiver, and dialed.

"...It is I. Is Genji there? An urgent matter has come up."



In front of the entrance hall, Shannon's once burning face had been cooled off by the frigid air. She had thought... that George's proposal would surely come sooner or later. It wasn't as though she hadn't prepared herself mentally. And she had answered by nodding. Had she been reckless because of her youth? Should she have thought about her future more seriously?

I wonder if my immediate reply made him think I'm a cheap girl. If I'd at least waited until tomorrow morning, would that at least have shown him I was taking this seriously?

Now that she'd already received the ring from George, Shannon kept fidgeting in embarrassment. I should've done this, I should've done that. As she did, she heard the sound of footsteps splashing through puddles. Shannon immediately chased away the emotions welling up inside her.

"...Genji-sama? And Kanon-kun too...! I-I'm sorry, I have to go back soon, umm..."

She grew stiff, thinking she'd surely be scolded for spending too much time in her secret lover's meeting with George.



"...Huh? Y-Yes, certainly...! What in the world...?"
"He said he had a premonition of misfortune. How convenient for him, considering he's the one who started this ceremony."
"We will enter from the back, so that Gohda doesn't notice us. Hide your footsteps."
"Yes. Nee-san, take care. You're so noisy."

Kanon was especially good at hiding his footsteps. Just like a cat. He was able to suddenly be there without anyone noticing and leave in the same way. For example, even though he stepped in puddles, the sound he made was far smaller than that of the rain hitting them... Genji also had abilities of that kind. Or rather, those servants called furniture were supposed to be like that. Just like how desks and closets go unnoticed by members of the family, these servants also held it as a great virtue to just suddenly be there whenever they were needed.

Compared to that, Shannon's footsteps still strongly asserted themselves. She was also trying to hide her footsteps, but compared to Kanon and Genji... well, you could say she was a little more boisterous...

Eventually, they reached the back door, and the three of them entered the mansion.



It was different from a sense of smell, and it seemed to hit the depths of their noses. This hard-to-describe sensation, which you might call a sixth sense, allowed them to perceive that something was different than usual.

"...Genji-sama."
"...Indeed. Let us hurry."

That sensation made it feel as though a tense something was pressing in around them. Realizing that, the three of them dashed up the stairs, heading for Kinzo's study while still hiding their footsteps. When they dashed up the stairs, that smell of sweet poison particular to Kinzo's study reached their noses.

"...hm."
"What is it, Genji-sama...?"



"Huh? Ah."

After hearing Kanon's words, she looked at the door to the study. A scorpion pattern was engraved on the doorknob. A powerful ward against magic. The final barrier, which protected Kinzo himself.

It had been broken. Of course, there was no change to the doorknob that the eye could see. However, those who could understand things people couldn't perceive... were able to recognize that a dramatic change had occurred...

"...Master. Master...! It is Genji. Please open the door."

Genji called in this way after knocking several times, but there was no answer from the study.

"Shannon, guard our backs. Kanon, search inside the room."
""Yes...!""



To protect the backs of the pair watching the door, Shannon faced the other way, ready for the unexpected.

"...The Master must be in here... But it's too quiet."
"Do you mean to say he's safe?"
"No. It's too quiet."
"...Could it... possibly be..."
"Master, excuse us about the door."

Genji pulled a gold key out of his pocket. It was the only key to the study that existed, other than the one Kinzo held. He stuck it in the key hole and turned it heavily. At first glance, that seemed to prove that it was a sturdy lock. However, now that the barrier had been destroyed, this door might as well have been left open, from the viewpoint of anyone with magical power. The heavy sound just now meant that the door had now been opened even for humans.

"...Excuse me."

As Genji respectfully bowed his head, and Kanon's sense of tension grew tighter, and Shannon trembled, they entered the study...



...He was sitting on the reception sofa so that his back faced them. Genji noticed the person sitting across from him, and again bowed deeply. Kanon also noticed that person, but he didn't bow his head. He stood in front of Shannon and spread out his arms, blocking the way to her. So without even seeing that person's face, Shannon already had a good idea who it was...

"...So, you have come, Beatrice-sama."



BGM: The Candles Dance

"...So, Ronove-sama has come as well."

Genji directed his greeting towards the thin darkness behind and to the right of Beatrice, where there shouldn't have been anything. Even Kanon and Shannon would never have imagined that someone was there. However, the darkness responded immediately and praised Genji's eyesight...



"My days have been full and satisfying. ...It appears you have been living quite a full life yourself, Ronove-sama."
"Yes. Thank you. And Shannon, it has been a long time since I last saw you as well. You have grown quite beautiful. And, it seems that you have grown quite strong. That is fortunate."
"...Thank you very much."
"...Nee-san, who in the world..."
"This will be our first meeting, Kanon-kun. I, Ronove, have been entrusted with the position of Beatrice-sama's head furniture. I am an old friend of Genji-san's, and I am also furniture, just like you. Although the master I serve is different."

The tense color didn't disappear from Kanon's face in the slightest. Depending on the master furniture served, they might be kind or brutal or anything else. If this person claimed to be furniture serving the hated Beatrice, then he must be despicable as well...

"*cackle*cackle*! It seems I'm thoroughly despised. It's as though you hate everything that has anything to do with me."

Beatrice openly sneered at Kanon's hate-filled face... Then, Kanon finally realized. Beatrice and Kinzo were having a chess game across the reception table. But Kinzo hadn't even quivered. He was holding his head with both hands, his eyes closed tight, as he contemplated his next move. Or was he in anguish...?

"...Master..."



"*cackle*cackle*! There's absolutely nothing I can do about it. Because it truly was decided by the fickle roulette."
"...L-Liar. We know you're just a murderer who kills for fun..."
"Stop it, Kanon-kun..."
"...So, Kinzo, isn't it about time you decided to accept your loss? *cackle* With this, our long contest is at an end, yes?"
"..."

At a glance, it was hard to make out the situation on that chaotic chessboard. However, judging by Kinzo's anguish and Beatrice's malicious confidence, it seemed to be over already...

"...It is unavoidable... Perhaps even this could be amusing."
"It is to me too. Resolving my contest with you may bring a flood of emotions, but it has already surpassed love and hate. It was fun. These past few decades certainly weren't boring...!"

Beatrice advanced her queen... and made her final move. And that... decided it.





Kinzo suddenly stood up and laughed, like an opera singer facing a full crowd and spreading his arms, as though he had succeeded in a century-long plan. That laugh... spat crimson.



But Kinzo kept laughing. The more he laughed, the more the hellfire spewed from his entire body and began to char him... Those flames became a brilliant light, which dazzlingly shone on the various magic tools throughout the room, making their distorted shadows dance across the walls. Those shadows looked like the dead in hell, watching over Kinzo in ecstasy as he burned...

And, for one who had made a contract with the witch, it was an extremely fitting end... in accordance with those terms...



Those incredible blazing flames disappeared as though he'd been completely burned up, and afterwards, nothing remained but a festering and burnt corpse that one could hardly bear to look at...

"...Horrible..."
"Hmph. You should talk. As if you didn't think that was a fitting way for him to die..."
"...Why have you shown yourself...? Do you have some business with us...?"
"Stop it, Kanon-kun. You mustn't provoke Beatrice-sama."
"It would seem you have them absolutely terrified. Pu ku ku ku."
"I imagine I'll never get along with Kanon. Hey, it's not as though I dislike you particularly..."

Beatrice grinned. Kanon violently averted his gaze, obviously unhappy. His reaction was so different from what he wanted to do that it made the witch and her butler laugh.

"Kanon, you stand in the presence of Beatrice-sama. Carefully consider your manner of speech."
"Oh, I care not, Genji. Let him say what he pleases. I am gracious."
"...How are you gracious...?!"



BGM: Organ Short #600 Million in C Minor

Kanon was taken aback by that creepy laughter... Beatrice wasn't here just to take Kinzo's life. The first twilight required six sacrifices. Kinzo alone wasn't nearly enough. And they'd just casually walked in here...

"*cackle*cackle*cackle*! Fear not, Kanon. It isn't as though you'll be selected as sacrifices just because you came here. After all, you were called here because you'd been selected already...!"
"...What...?!"

Their instincts were good enough to spot her meaning instantly...Six sacrifices were required for the first twilight. After Kinzo, how many more would you need to add up to six? In this mansion, the number five instantly made them think of the number of servants here..

"...Is that... what you desire?"
"Indeed. Thank me, furniture. Tonight, your days of suffering will finally end. You ought to thank me for coming here to tell you this."
"...Certainly. If that is your desire."
"...G-Genji-sama..."

Genji had agreed to the witch's heartless announcement with his usual demeanor, without raising an eyebrow.

"Now that the Master is dead, Beatrice-sama is our master. Responding to her demands shall be our final duty. Shannon. Kanon. You have done well serving until today. That hard work is now over."
"...As I expected of you, Genji. As your fellow furniture, I'm proud to have known you."
"Shannon, do you have any objections?"
"...No."
"...I heard that George-sama gave you a ring. Do you still say... that you have no regrets?"
"Yes. That blessing was more than furniture deserves. Just receiving the ring has already satisfied my feelings."



There probably were regrets left in her heart. She probably wanted to spend a little more warm time with the person she cared for, George. But she released herself from that. She took a single deep breath... and a blank expression rose to her face.

"...Very well."
"It does surprise me a tad to find that you've gained such composure, Shannon. It seems you too have taken a philosophical view as furniture."
"Won't you at least shed some bitter tears for not being able to spend a night with the man you love? What a boring woman."
"...This feeling cannot be understood by the likes of you, Beatrice-sama. If you desire our lives, please accept them. We will solemnly carry out that duty."
"...Very well. Excellently put..."
"Pu ku ku ku. Just the type of person Beatrice-sama can't handle."
"She's been taking such a far-sighted view of things lately. I must've tormented her too much last time. Speaking of which, didn't I do the same to Battler? Hmmm. Am I still soft? Or is the way I corner them lacking? In any case, she's just no fun."
"...However, it seems you will still entertain me, right? Kanooon?"
"...Kanon-kun..."
"..."

Compared to the two who had taken a far-sighted approach, there was a painful anguish on Kanon's face. Kanon was still far too young to accept his demise after being told of it by a suddenly appearing witch...



"...Are you trying to make me your plaything...?"

Kanon realized that he was being provoked. However, no matter how furiously anger spurred him on, his opponent was a witch. He was furniture. He hadn't had a chance of victory from the beginning. But the witch was expecting that he'd struggle in vain and writhe around, and was even looking forward to it... Just thinking about that was frustrating enough to get his blood boiling.

Was disappointing the witch by refusing to resist, like the other two, the only way he could strike back at her...?

"Eldest of the Seven Sisters of Purgatory, Lucifer. Arise."



"Kanon, it would be far too cruel to force furniture to fight a witch. No matter how much anger spurs you on, you would have no hope in a battle without a chance of success. Of course, such a battle would be boring for me as well."
"...So, let it be furniture against furniture. Why not resolve it with a battle between you two? That should be enough to allow you some hope for victory, right...?"
"...Forgive me, Beatrice-sama, but how could I be inferior to this good-for-nothing furniture?"
"As if this cutie would have any chance against me... Heheheheheheheheheheheheh."
"...Nng."
"Prove that you can defeat my furniture, the Seven Stakes of Purgatory. If you manage to win through... let us see. I will let you select the five who will escape becoming one of the 13 sacrifices. I will welcome the five you recommend into the Golden Land without any conditions. How about that?"

Kanon understood that he was being provoked. However, the witch's offer was very tempting. By this point, Kanon couldn't care less about this evil ceremony the witch and the rest were trying to carry out. On the contrary, it was much more important that he remain alive so that he could be invited to the Golden Land... and have his wish granted by Beatrice there...

"You cried, saying you'd had enough of being furniture, right...? I shall grant your desire. I shall give you that human body you wanted so much, you cried yourself to sleep. What do you say...? That way, you and Jessica could be together, yes? Ooh, just perfect. You may recommend that Jessica and yourself be invited to the Golden Land."
"...If you alone finding happiness isn't a satisfying solution for you, then you can add in Shannon and George, the one she loves... If you're worried about duty, then you can also add Genji. Hoh! That's five people. Isn't that enough, Kanon? With this much of a reward, *cackle*cackle*cackle*! You won't let me get bored, will you...?"
"...She's just playing with you. There is no need to listen to her."



BGM: Moon

Beatrice couldn't hide her evil smile at those words.

"I don't like it. I want to be happy! I've had enough of being furniture. I want to become human... and have normal love...! I want to know that... the ocean is blue, like you!"
"...How young. I'm jealous."
"That's why I like the young ones. Genji, Shannon, stay back. Kanon, Lucifer, forward."
"As you command."
"..."



BGM: Where

That was probably humiliating for Lucifer. But at the same time, she was also happy... that she was lucky enough to have this adorable prey all to herself...

SardonicTyrant
Feb 26, 2016

BTICH IM A NEWT
熱くなれ夢みた明日を
必ずいつかつかまえる
走り出せ振り向くことなく
&



:stonk: Jesus Christ

...erm...is what I would say if I believed in magic...

But it's interesting that Kinzo is definitely one of the six sacrifices this time. And all of his most loyal servants as well.

SardonicTyrant fucked around with this message at 16:47 on Dec 11, 2016

EagerSleeper
Feb 3, 2010

by R. Guyovich
RIP in advance, Kanon.

If you two would you like to do your own occult version of save scumming like Kinzo, then here's a tarot website that will let you do that. http://www.freedivination.com/tarot/

AfroSquirrel
Sep 3, 2011

My, what tiny hands you have Lucifer.

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
The tarot never even gets to 22, Kinzo. The hell are you talking about 24?

Dr Pepper
Feb 4, 2012

Don't like it? well...

Ok Kanon. Third time's the charm. You can beat Beatrice this time.

Fabulousvillain
May 2, 2015
Kinzo being set on fire is a pretty great metaphor since he was the first to die here, good job dipshit.

curiousCat
Sep 23, 2012

Does this look like the face of mercy, kupo?

Glazius posted:

The tarot never even gets to 22, Kinzo. The hell are you talking about 24?

he's talking about a clock

resurgam40
Jul 22, 2007

Battler, the literal stupidest man on earth. Why are you even here, Battler, why did you come back to this place so you could fuck literally everything up?

SardonicTyrant posted:

:stonk: Jesus Christ

...erm...is what I would say if I believed in magic...

But it's interesting that Kinzo is definitely one of the six sacrifices this time. And all of his most loyal servants as well.

Are they? I wonder... Along with Kinzo, there's Genji, Shannon, and Kanon, that's four... so who are the other two? It can't be Ronove and lucifer, because they aren't established bodies on Rokkenjima, and it's probably not Beatrice herself... so why the weirdness of numbers? Is a couple of the children going to bite it as well to make it right?

We'll have to see how the bodies shake out before we say anything definite, but if we step away from the magical interpretation here, I think Kinzo called these servants up to die, before self immolating. Perhaps that's the great metaphor behind Kanon's resistance to "Beatrice"- he still chafes under the yoke of furniturehood, and longs to be free, but keeps getting shanked before he can realize it.

vvv Kumasawa I might allow, but loyal servants, Beatrice said... Gohda was hired by Krauss and is loyal to him, and even Kumasawa is portrayed as being a bit of a flake due to advancing years... So I really don't know.

resurgam40 fucked around with this message at 21:22 on Dec 11, 2016

Dr Pepper
Feb 4, 2012

Don't like it? well...

Kumasawa and Ghoda.

KataraniSword
Apr 22, 2008

but at least I don't have
a MLP or MSPA avatar.
I am my own man.

Dr Pepper posted:

Kumasawa and Ghoda.

I think resurgam's point is that unlike the other servants, Kumasawa and Gouda haven't been called to Kinzo's quarters to watch :supaburn:. Or at least, they haven't shown up in this scene.

tiistai
Nov 1, 2012

Solo Melodica

resurgam40 posted:

vvv Kumasawa I might allow, but loyal servants, Beatrice said...

No, that's what SardonicTyrant said. Beatrice didn't say much anything in the update, the servants realized on their own why they had been summoned.

Quinn2win
Nov 9, 2011

Foolish child of man...
After reading all this,
do you still not understand?


:siren:Video: Kanon VS Lucifer:siren:







"...Dammit. Another weird thing's happening... Like I'd ever believe in a magic battle...!"
"Look, look, don't turn your eyes away, look at it. Look, look, look! It's magic, it's furniture, no matter how much you try to deny me and magic, look, look, look, look, look!"
"If you've got all this happening right in front of you, it'd be a waste to miss it, don't you thiiiiiink? Look, look, look, just stop thinking, magic exists! This is fantasy! Don't close your eyes, look closely, look, look, look, look!!"
"Dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit... I won't accept witches, I won't accept magic...! But, if it's being done right in the open like that, what am I supposed to say?! drat, dammiiiiit!"
"Come now, don't turn away, look closely, okaaaaaay?? Magic exists, this is fantasy, so stop playing detective. I know your secret, you actually don't really like to think things through, right?? Then just stop, stoooop, *cackle*cackle*! Look, look, it's gotta be fantasy, gotta be fantasy, kihhihihyahyahhyahhyahhyahhyahhyaaaaaahhh!!"
"Shut up, shut up, shut uuuuuuuuuuup...!!! Don't talk to meeeeeeee...!!"



"Then you wouldn't have to have your skin ripped off while you're still alive... or get lashed all over your body as you squirm until you die. Hehheheheheheheheh! You're a cutie, so apologize... If you do, I'll finish you off so, so gently, while it still feels great..."
"Be silent, furniture of the witch. I have no intention of speaking with you."
"...S-So you're saying you think nothing of me...? Hehhheheheheheheheheh, that disrespectful gaze of yours... is really ticking me offff!!"





"..."
"...Isn't he stronger than he was against Satan?"
"This is why humans are so frightening. In fact, sometimes they even become witches and treat demons as butlers."
"Pu ku ku ku ku! So, which should I cheer on?"
"...Are you... saying this guy's on par with me...?!"
"...Don't look down on me. As long as you have that pride, you'll never defeat me."
"Y-Y-You speak of Lucifer, the eldest of the Seven Sisters of Purgatory, and say that I cannot win?! H-How conceited!!"





Kanon was desperately trying to stay alive, and he had a strong desire to become human. But Lucifer didn't feel anything stronger than a slight desire to play. So, that led to an inevitable result. It was a result that could be reached by the power of humans. The power of the heart.

"...That's as far as you go. You cannot win against me."

The glowing red curve extended straight out from Kanon's arm, pointing at Lucifer's throat, just beneath the tip of her chin...



As she ground her teeth in irritation, she tried to deny the truth right before her eyes. But no matter how much she believed in her own superiority, it didn't change the facts right in front of her.



BGM: Organ Short #600 Million in C Minor

"...Lucifer, you are boring Milady. Was this opponent really too much for you to handle...?"
"I'm disappointed, eldest of the Seven Staaakes. Hahihihihihihihihihihihi...!"

It would have seemed like mere rebuke to an outsider. However, furniture serving the witch knew what kind of severe treatment was promised by that rebuke... and understood what had been left unsaid...

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaahh!! You... good for nothing furnituuuuuuuuuuuuure!!!"

She howled. Abandoning her last bit of pride, she made her body explode, exposing her true form. That form was a demon stake, which bounced off the walls surrounding the room...





"K-Kanon-kun...!!"



After flying about wildly for some time, with a speed approaching the limits of what a human eye could follow, Lucifer flew at Kanon's heart... She could tell that it was Kanon's blood by the sweet taste of it... But she quickly noticed one thing.

...She hadn't pierced his heart...

"...Hoh. *cackle*cackle*!"
"This is why humans are frightening. Would you like some black tea?"
"I am fine for now. This is so amusing, I don't even need any...!"
"...K... Kanon-kun..."



BGM: Black Lilliana

The floor was stained with dripping blood. It really was Kanon's blood... but it wasn't flowing out of his chest. Kanon had sacrificed his own left hand to protect his heart...

Lucifer was arrogant. Even though she'd been given enough time to realize that this was an opponent capable of cornering her, in her pride, she had believed him to be worthless. She had gotten careless. So, just as she had announced, she had aimed for his chest, trying to pierce his heart. Because she was arrogant, she hadn't even thought of aiming for somewhere other than the place she had announced.

...No, maybe she had thought about it a little. However, her pride would not allow her to aim for a different spot. After all, she was... Lucifer the Proud.

Kanon, withstanding the pain, grasped the demon stake sticking deep into his left hand strongly with his right hand... and pulled it out... When she heard the sound of breaking bones and even more blood dripping down, Shannon looked away reflexively. There was an air hole in the back of the pierced hand so big, you could clearly see through to the other side...

Kanon's face was filled with pain, but right now, he had won, without a doubt. The demon stake he was gripping with his right hand turned back into Lucifer again... So that Kanon was now gripping exactly where her neck was.

"...Ga... gu..."



Kanon didn't hold back at all with the hand gripping Lucifer's throat. She had challenged him again after their fight had already been decided. Kanon had no obligation to be considerate. But even so, Kanon released the witch's furniture. Was it his naive humanism, his pity for another furniture, or a final bit of respect to the witch?

In any case, when she was released, Lucifer fell face-down on the ground, wretching and moaning over the pain in her throat...

"Spectacular, Kanon. Your great efforts have proven the correctness of some of Kinzo's research."

Ronove was clapping his hands. To Kanon, who had won at great cost and had a wound on his left hand that wouldn't close, Ronove appause only felt like mockery.

"...All possibilities dwell within the human heart, was it? My, my, this is why humans are frightening! Well done, Kanon. You were victorious. Spectacular!"
"...Haah... haah... haah..."
"Are you okay?! Kanon-kun..."

Shannon ran up to him and wrapped a handkerchief around his left hand, which was still spraying blood.



"...Y-You haven't forgotten our promise, right... Beatrice...?"
"Indeed. Of course I haven't forgotten. Witches and demons may be inhumane. However, we are much more noble than humans when it comes to keeping promises."
"I will not go back on my word. I guaranteed that if you won, I would give you the right to decide the five people who will escape becoming the 13 sacrifices."
"...B-Beatrice-sama, it's not like I've, lo... higi!!"

When Beatrice waved her pipe, heaven and earth turned over just for Lucifer. So, as a horribly natural result, she 'fell' onto the ceiling. The ceiling doesn't seem that high to people standing on the floor. However, people who fall on it upside-down and head-first usually don't agree...

"Milady, isn't that a little much?"
"*cackle*cackle*! Perhaps you are right. I suppose I'll forgive her."

Beatrice waved her pipe again. When she did, the magic that had been effecting Lucifer was released. So, as a horribly natural result, this time she 'fell' properly, back onto the floor.

"...Nggg... gghh... Beatrice-sama, f-forgive me..."
"What are you so afraid of? I have already forgiven you, haven't I? *cackle*!"
"So, Kanon. Shall we continue?"
"...Continue what? You aren't saying you want me to finish her, are you...?!"
"Ah, no, no. It isn't over yet, right?"
"...What isn't? Stop dodging the question...!!"



BGM: Nighteyes





All the Seven Sisters of Purgatory were here, after Kanon was able to defeat one only by sacrificing his left arm... By now, Kanon regretted his thoughtlessness in accepting the witch's challenge. He had been foolish to assume that a game against a witch would be on an even footing...!

"...Laaame. Onee-sama, why are you crawling on the floor?"
"Y-You people... nnnggh..."
"I told you, Onee-sama's useless. Even though she acts like she's so great just because she's the oldest, that's only on the outside."
"Yeah, seriously! Lucifer onee-sama, your disgraceful behavior will damage the reputation of us all! Know your shame! You novice!"
"...Nng... gggh..."
"Kanon-kuuun, that was totally awesome. But don't get cocky, okay? Lucifer onee-sama brags all the time, but she's no big deal compared to the rest of us sisters."
"...That's why I'm always saying Lucifer-nee shouldn't do anything. Just let her keep bragging all the time. After all, those of us with talent can handle all the tough jobs."
"What are you gonna do, Onee-sama? Out of respect for your pride, we were planning to stay out of your way, in the hopes that you'd challenge him again in that beat-up body of yours..."
"...But Kanon-kun sure is strong, right? Right now, no matter how much you struggle, there's no way you could win, right...?"
"...Y-You people..."
"*cackle*cackle*! My, my, you sisters are always so lively. Is this any time to fight amongst yourselves? It's only together that you're the Seven Stakes of Purgatory, correct? Now, play nice and execute the tasks I give you. And swiftly, okay?"
"Hey, Lucifer onee-sama, if you wanna borrow the power of your little sisters, then say it, okay? We wanna hear you ask us for help with your own mouth."
"Nng... Do you plan to mock me even more...?!"



"...You... b-bitch..."

The Seven Sisters of Purgatory unanimously closed in on their worthless sister. Abusing her. Even Kanon, who had been fighting for his life until a second ago, couldn't bear to look at it...

"A-As if... as if I... could say... something like that..."
"Quickly now. Clearly, we won't make any progress here with you alone. Hurry up, let the Seven Sisters strike Kanon."
"Pu ku ku ku... My, my, what is the matter, Lucifer? This is an order from Milady, is it not?"
"...How cruel."

After grinding her teeth over and over after hearing her sisters' curses, ...Lucifer trembled all over... and answered her sisters' request...



"And shameful!!"
"A-And shameful... Lucifer, the eldest sister... beg... whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!"
"Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...!!"

The girl known as Pride was finally unable to endure the words she was saying...and broke down crying. However, the six younger sisters kept giggling coldheartedly.

"Wait a sec! Don't try to trick us by crying! You haven't finished saying iiit!"
"That should be enough. Come, sisters, let us display our power."
"I won't be satisfied 'til I hear the whole thing, okay?! C'mon, c'mon, Onee-sama, keep going!"



BGM: Life's End

"Okay, how should we play with this pitiful furniture? Any wonderful plans?"
"Meee, me! Beelze thiiinks the seven of us shooould get along and split Kanon up between us!"
"Good idea. That way all of the sisters can get along."
"Then I'll take the head! I'll leave the limbs and guts to you all!!"
"No, no, noooooooooooo!! I get the heeead!!"
"There's no way that promise'll mean anything, right?! First one there wins!"
"Hihihihihi!! Kanon-kun, if you've got any ideas for how we should kill you, just tell us, okay? The Seven Sisters'll kill you in an aaawesome way!"
"...drat..."
"...Aaarrrrrrgggh!! You've shamed me so deeply!! Slicing you into eight pieces won't be enough!! I'll slice you into a hundred pieces!! Here we go, everyone!!"



The seven of them burst at once. They had no intention of playing or boasting. This time, they would genuinely follow their master's order. Take Kanon down. Swiftly!

The Seven Sisters jumped around the room faster than the eye could see, examining how they could best kill Kanon. They tortured Kanon with their cruel giggles, sometimes making a close pass at him. They kept scraping his arms, shoulders, and cheeks, gradually carving red letters into his body...

At that moment, Shannon dashed up behind him, holding on to him so that she blocked the way to his body at least a little.



BGM: Scorpion Entrails

At the same time, a red cylinder wrapped around the two of them, like a beam of light sent from heaven. That cylinder repelled the evil ones who tormented Kanon...

"Whaaaat?!! You're me-an! This has nothing to do with yo-u!"
"Ah, I see. You must want to play with us."
"Kyaha! Then I'll take i-t! All mine!!"
"Beatrice-sama, can we take Shannon as our prey...?"
"Hmm? Aah, I don't mind, do as you like. It seems Kanon alone won't be enough to satisfy your gluttony."
"You have our deepest gratitude. Come on, I'll make you regret coming out uninvited!"
"I'll turn you into scraps of meat so unrecognizable, you won't be able to tell which is which, mix you and mix you and mince you into hamburgers!"
"Idiot, breaking that barrier should come first, right?! Don't let your gluttony get in the way of your job!"
""""Yees, Onee-sama!!""""



...Shannon's barrier certainly was strong. It was powerful enough to impress even Beatrice. With its strength, frail furniture would turn to dust just by touching it, and it was firm, like a tree with deep roots. But no matter how big a tree gets, it will eventually surrender to a saw or a hatchet. For the Seven Sisters, 'chopping down' Shannon's barrier would be annoying, but not impossible.

A sound like beetles jumping about grew even fiercer and filled the room. The red barrier began to be cut up and eroded away as though with an hatchet, a saw... no, a chainsaw by now...



"...Because I couldn't overlook it."

As Shannon covered Kanon, who was already at his limits, sprawled on the floor, she spoke back resolutely.



"...Not all deaths are the same.
An cruel death will cause you far more anguish than merely dying. *cackle*cackle*cackle*!"
"...Go ahead, do as you like. Just as you always do what you want, I did what I wanted."
"...Hmmmm. At any rate, you're not quite amusing at the present moment. Romance is most interesting when you're wondering whether it will succeed or not."
"Once it does succeed, a woman is like salmon who has finished laying its eggs. I have already tired of you."
"Thank you. No words from a witch would make me happier."
"...Hehehehhihihahaha. Then, at least in the end, let me see you die in a truly entertaining manner."
"Seven Sisters, can you hear me?! Kill Shannon in a way that shows me the limits of brutality!!"



"...My apologies. In the end, I wasn't able to reach your level, Genji-sama."
"...You're an idiot, Nee-san... If you'd just let me be, then you might not have had to meet a horrible end..."
"No, it's fine. I received a ring from George-sama and lived as a woman. I have protected you and lived as a sister. With this, my life is complete, with no regrets."



"Look at me, I am a human!! Don't spout off philosophical crap, like you're more complete than I am, you furnituuuuuuuuuuure!!"
"...How ugly. Are those regrets... what you truly are?"
"They aren't a regreeeeeets, this is called LIVING!! What's this about not minding if you die, just because you were given a ring?! Aaaaah, I can't understand it, it's incomprehensible, disappointing, outrageous, stunning, and no goddamn good at aaaaaaall!!"
"...Milady, perhaps you're acting a tad undignified."
"Shut up, furniture!!"
"Shannooooonn, do you think I'll let you die so easilyyyyyyyyyyy?! Now's the time to bite your tooooooongue!!"
"...How pitiful. If you can see yourself reflected in my eyes, then shudder at your own ugliness."
"Fear not, once I've crushed you up, you'll be much more ugly even while you still liiiiiiiive!!!"



Then, Genji gently held her from behind... and covered her eyes with his right hand.

"...Genji-sama..."
"You've already done enough... Go to sleep before me."
"...Yes. Thank you very much, Genji-sama..."
"...Indeed."

After that, Genji softly pressed his left hand near her collarbone... As he did, eminating from that area... a crimson stain gently spread out.

When Genji removed his hand, bright-red, fresh blood oozed out of there. It only happened for the first instant, and it was shaped like a crimson rose... And when he removed his right hand covering her face, there was a peaceful expression there, as though she was sleeping.



BGM: Daydream's End

Her soul had already been sent to a world where the malicious witch and her furniture could not reach her, no matter how evilly they tortured her... This scene left Beatrice and the Seven Sisters stunned. Only Ronove wore a mysterious smile.

Then, Genji leaned over Kanon, who was crouching on the floor.

"...You did well. You should sleep now too."
"...Yes. Thank you very much, Genji-sama."

Just as he had done with Shannon, he softly covered Kanon's eyes with his hand, then gently pressed the area around Kanon's collarbone with his other hand. And when his hand was removed with the lightness of a feather, there was a crimson rose there. But that rose shape quickly turned into the stain of bright-red blood pouring out...

"...Wh-What is...that...?"



"Spectacular, Genji. You truly are furniture."
"...Thank you very much. Well then, Beatrice-sama, Ronove-sama. With this as my final task, allow me to rest."
"...Tch. drat you, snatching away my fun. Why don't I take all the thrashing and mashing I wanted to do to them...and give it to you instead??"

Beatrice faced him with an unsatisfied expression, but Ronove spoke quietly to Genji with a soothing smile.

"You have worked hard. You are my greatest servant. As a final gift, I shall bestow upon you a peaceful sleep fitting for all the labors you have performed."
"What?! Wait, it's not your place to...!"



He crumpled, falling into a sleep that no witch could call him back from... It was as filled with kindness as the sleep he had given Shannon and Kanon...

"...What was that, Ronove? What a boring anticlimax."
"Are you not a mighty Great Witch, Milady? What happened here is hardly worthy of your concern. It isn't like you, to let the provocation of someone like Shannon get to you."
"...Hmm."

What was it that had Beatrice so irritated? Was she still unable to remove the thorn of Shannon's words? Ronove laughed lightly, as though lamenting the complexity of humanity and a woman's heart, and ordered the Seven Sisters to go. After all, there were still two sacrifices left for the first twilight.



resurgam40
Jul 22, 2007

Battler, the literal stupidest man on earth. Why are you even here, Battler, why did you come back to this place so you could fuck literally everything up?

ProfessorProf posted:

"Look at me, I am a human!! Don't spout off philosophical crap, like you're more complete than I am, you furnituuuuuuuuuuure!!"
"...How ugly. Are those regrets... what you truly are?"
"They aren't a regreeeeeets, this is called LIVING!! What's this about not minding if you die, just because you were given a ring?! Aaaaah, I can't understand it, it's incomprehensible, disappointing, outrageous, stunning, and no goddamn good at aaaaaaall!!"

Oh ho ho, what's this now? I though you and Kinzo together were celebrating how unlike humans you were, and every time Battler or Ronove asserts your humanity you're quick to correct them, but in the face of Shannon's bravery and selflessness, you tell a much different tale. Beato insists she can't understand it at all, but from the fact she goes all the gently caress to pieces in the face of genuine love and altruism belies that she understands more than she ever wants to. To be precise, she understands that they are not there in her life... and when they were there, that they were betrayed.

Betrayal.

That's it, isn't it? That is the core of what she's doing, the reason for it all... what is meant by collecting on Kinzo's debt. She does not want his assets or his love, she wants to DESTROY him; she wants to avenge herself upon the man who made her feel loved, who "brought her to life", and then took it all away by locking her in a cage. She forgot who she was, why she was there, and when she was set free, it all came back... just how much she gave up, and how little she got in return. You can see it in what makes her happiest, and why she acts as she does toward Kanon- on all the island, he's the only one who's been the hardest shafted by his fate and the most keen awareness of it, and his despair as he is betrayed by his own expectations is such that it makes Beato forget her own. That's why he's become Beato's second biggest punching bag (besides Battler, of course) and why she enjoys toying with him so much: just like Lucy with her football, she revels in building up Kanon's expectations one way and then yanking the rug from out of him, just like Kinzo did to her. And she can't do the same to Shannon, because her expectations were rewarded- all of her relationships have been reciprocated, George, Kanon, and even frigging Genji, which floors me, as this is pretty much his first act of self-autonomy in this story ever- and that's what Beatrice cannot stand, what she's weak against.

Hurt repaying hurt. This is no story of magic and wonder, this is a story about bullying and abuse twisting otherwise happy, loving people into conduits for even more pain and sorrow in other peoples lives. And the answer to it is not eye of newt or guts of scorpion, it is mercy.

Aumanor
Nov 9, 2012

ProfessorProf posted:

"Look, look, don't turn your eyes away, look at it. Look, look, look! It's magic, it's furniture, no matter how much you try to deny me and magic, look, look, look, look, look!"
"If you've got all this happening right in front of you, it'd be a waste to miss it, don't you thiiiiiink? Look, look, look, just stop thinking, magic exists! This is fantasy! Don't close your eyes, look closely, look, look, look, look!!"
"Dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit... I won't accept witches, I won't accept magic...! But, if it's being done right in the open like that, what am I supposed to say?! drat, dammiiiiit!"
"Come now, don't turn away, look closely, okaaaaaay?? Magic exists, this is fantasy, so stop playing detective. I know your secret, you actually don't really like to think things through, right?? Then just stop, stoooop, *cackle*cackle*! Look, look, it's gotta be fantasy, gotta be fantasy, kihhihihyahyahhyahhyahhyahhyahhyaaaaaahhh!!"

That's some masterful trolling of the audience, Ryukishi07.

Also, once again, all this supposedly awesome, magical stuff leaves exactly zero credible witnesses.

oath2order
Oct 12, 2013

It's MAGIC. I don't have to explain shit!



This is a great post, and reading your comments is always a high point of my day, but have you considered that perhaps the solution is that magic is real?

EagerSleeper
Feb 3, 2010

by R. Guyovich
I wonder what Genji's deal is? Being furniture just can't be that fun and something to be devoted to. The superpowers do seem pretty cool though.

resurgam40
Jul 22, 2007

Battler, the literal stupidest man on earth. Why are you even here, Battler, why did you come back to this place so you could fuck literally everything up?

oath2order posted:

This is a great post, and reading your comments is always a high point of my day, but have you considered that perhaps the solution is that magic is real?

Magic is only "real" if it can be performed exactly the same in front of everyone, and so far, it has only been performed in front of "believers" in magic or people who ended up dead by the end of the story. Legitimate energy sources, metamorphoses, and systems of physics do not suddenly stop working depending on who's observing; that isn't how those things work. And the metaphorical, systematic meanings behind these acts are not only hinted at by the author to be the truth, but are far more interesting to me than any so-called magic has been yet.

In short, I'm flattered that you think so highly of my posting and hope I can continue to meet expectations, but I will accept Ottumon's chimps before I accept magic by a witch. :colbert: (Really, the only problem I have with that theory is the lack of hair and poo poo about, which a troop of monkeys would surely leave behind. If he can tell us what happened to it to my satisfaction...)

POOL IS CLOSED
Jul 14, 2011

I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.
Pillbug

resurgam40 posted:

Magic is only "real" if it can be performed exactly the same in front of everyone, and so far, it has only been performed in front of "believers" in magic or people who ended up dead by the end of the story. Legitimate energy sources, metamorphoses, and systems of physics do not suddenly stop working depending on who's observing; that isn't how those things work. And the metaphorical, systematic meanings behind these acts are not only hinted at by the author to be the truth, but are far more interesting to me than any so-called magic has been yet.

In short, I'm flattered that you think so highly of my posting and hope I can continue to meet expectations, but I will accept Ottumon's chimps before I accept magic by a witch. :colbert: (Really, the only problem I have with that theory is the lack of hair and poo poo about, which a troop of monkeys would surely leave behind. If he can tell us what happened to it to my satisfaction...)

they're bald chimps in diapers :colbert:

CottonWolf
Jul 20, 2012

Good ideas generator

resurgam40 posted:

Magic is only "real" if it can be performed exactly the same in front of everyone, and so far, it has only been performed in front of "believers" in magic or people who ended up dead by the end of the story. Legitimate energy sources, metamorphoses, and systems of physics do not suddenly stop working depending on who's observing; that isn't how those things work. And the metaphorical, systematic meanings behind these acts are not only hinted at by the author to be the truth, but are far more interesting to me than any so-called magic has been yet.

And Battler. Battler pretty clearly saw that last bit of magic. I'm still not sure how literally we're meant to take the higher level of the chess game though.

curiousCat
Sep 23, 2012

Does this look like the face of mercy, kupo?
The most interesting thing in their was Ronove calling Genji his servant.

curiousCat fucked around with this message at 00:25 on Dec 13, 2016

Aumanor
Nov 9, 2012

curiousCat posted:

The most interesting thing in their was Ronove calling Genji [/i]his[/i] servant.

Especially given the similarity of their names.

KataraniSword
Apr 22, 2008

but at least I don't have
a MLP or MSPA avatar.
I am my own man.

CottonWolf posted:

And Battler. Battler pretty clearly saw that last bit of magic. I'm still not sure how literally we're meant to take the higher level of the chess game though.

Well, I mean. Meta Battler is in Purgatorio with Beatrice, a realm that by its definition is magical in nature. It probably does not actually exist if magic does not exist, and by that recknoning, the Battler that witnesses this magic is also a part of it.

CottonWolf
Jul 20, 2012

Good ideas generator

curiousCat posted:

The most interesting thing in their was Ronove calling Genji his servant.

Clearly Ronove is a master craftsman and made several exceptionally lifelike robots, which he then sold to Kinzo. He still affectionately refers to them as his servants. They're definitely all robots and not lesser demons, no magic at all required.

Ismene
Apr 26, 2012
Pillbug
This is all well and good, but have we considered the possibility that perhaps nobody actually died in any sense that actually matters? The whole point is to open the way to the Golden Land. Perhaps physical bodies aren't required there, like it's some kind of higher, enlightened plane?

bman in 2288
Apr 21, 2010
In that case, then everyone dies, and Beatrice wins. Again.

I'm gonna admit it. I'm the Battler here. Thinking through these things hurts my head. loving witches and claiming they aren't human when they go ahead and claim they're human.

Battler, just get over the fact that you can't handle your family killing each other. They're dysfunctional as hell, blame your grandpa.

Ismene
Apr 26, 2012
Pillbug
Admitting that someone in your family is a deranged mass murderer is a very tough pill to swallow. They may be dysfunctional, but they were never that reprehensible in front of Battler. It can't possibly be any of your uncles or aunts, or their servants. No -human- could do such a terrible thing.

Dr Pepper
Feb 4, 2012

Don't like it? well...

halfhazardKnight posted:

Admitting that someone in your family is a deranged mass murderer is a very tough pill to swallow. They may be dysfunctional, but they were never that reprehensible in front of Battler. It can't possibly be any of your uncles or aunts, or their servants. No -human- could do such a terrible thing.

Which is just another point for the Chimpanzee theory. :tinfoil:

Ismene
Apr 26, 2012
Pillbug
If it's easier for you to believe in a chimpanzee or chimpanzees slaughtering their way through a rich family's private island through adorable hi-jinks than a witch executing the business end of a Faustian bargain...

Quinn2win
Nov 9, 2011

Foolish child of man...
After reading all this,
do you still not understand?


October 5th, 1986, 12:21 AM



Rokkenjima had always been empty, except for the Ushiromiya Family household. So, checking that the doors and windows were all closed had no real purpose. However, ever since the time Natsuhi had condemned such an attitude as being careless, the nighttime rounds had become part of the servants' daily routine.

...In the first place, Natsuhi had ordered this because of the occasional witch disturbances. Everyone who came and left this island knew about the legend of Beatrice, the witch of the forest. It had become established as this island's characteristic ghost story. Because of that, it was only natural that some people would claim that, when they thought they were alone in the mansion, they would hear a strange sound or see the shadow of a person. However, when that created a little too much of a disturbance and reached Natsuhi's ears, she made a fuss, thinking that some suspicious person might have been entering and leaving. Apparently, she had roused all the servants and had them check throughout the mansion. Because all of that panic over the witch had happened before Gohda's arrival, he had only heard about it from the more senior servants.

Ghost stories like that could be found in any workplace. Even at the hotels and restaurants Gohda had worked at, there had been plenty of them. So when he heard about that story on this island, he'd given a forced smile, thinking 'Ah, so they have that kind of thing here after all'. That forced smile aside, he had figured that, when in Rome, do as the Romans do, and had taken it seriously. Gohda went along with it on the outside, but in his heart, he'd assumed it to be a childish trick. At first, that is.



He could understand how someone doing the rounds on an eerie night like this... might believe they'd seen a ghost if they saw a lace curtain waving in the breeze from a window that hadn't been closed.

"So, if you make fun of the witch of the portrait, there is a curse. It seems there was even a servant who received a serious injury and quit. Well, I wouldn't want that. Think of my age. I probably wouldn't be granted a workplace this hospitable again... Aaah. Witch of the portrait, I'm working sincerely, so please give me some peace."

Gohda prayed to the portrait, his hands together, as though he was at a Shinto shrine...



The kitchen? Was that the sound of something metal falling on the floor? Maybe a mouse or a cockroach had come out and knocked over some of the dishes. No, no, how could that be? It was usually cleaned thoroughly!

Thinking he'd check out what that noise really had been, Gohda entered the kitchen.



*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*.

To a cook like Gohda, the sound felt like the lid on a pressure cooker or something shaking. Surely, there wouldn't be a pot on the burner when no one was in the kitchen. Even if someone was using the gas, walking away from it would be quite dangerous.

...Just in case, Gohda decided to inspect the area around the gas range...



When he did, in the corner with the gas range, the pressure cooker really had been set out, just as he'd thought. But the flame wasn't on. And yet, the lid was clanking... Was something fermenting and leaking gas? How could that be? Then was there a mouse or something inside? How could there be? Ridiculous...

When people were watching, Gohda acted as though he had a bold personality fitting for his build, but he actually had an unexpectedly timid side to him. He was frightened that there might be something inside, and he couldn't bring himself to check it carelessly... In his cowardice, ..he grabbed a nearby wooden pestle, and with a *clunk!* he tapped it a little forcefully against the side of the pressure cooker.

When he did, the clanking sound suddenly stopped. He should've been relieved that it had stopped, but the fact that it had stopped when he'd hit it was even more eerie, and made him even more suspicious about what was inside...



He repeated that many times, trying to build up his own confidence. The gap between what he was saying and what he was doing was quite comical.

"Who would believe in a witch, who would believe in magic or curses...? Come on, show me what you really are...! Take that!"

...He removed the lid of the pressure cooker.



...There was absolutely nothing frightening like he'd imagined.

"...Whew. Hahahaha, it's only natural. There's no way there could have been anything inside."

By now, Gohda realized that he had been a coward. So, while he still had some doubts as to what had caused the lid to make that sound, he figured it wasn't a big problem, and decided not to worry about it too much. Then he took the lid he'd grabbed... and softly set it back down where it had been. It's fine, it won't make a sound. Of course it won't. As if witches or magic could exist...!



BGM: Red Dread

"...Huh...?"

*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*.

*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*clank*!

"...E-Eeeeeeeeeeeppp!!"

All of the pots and dishes in the kitchen started clanking at once. It grew even stronger, so that finally, the lid to one of the pots fell off...!



Lids fell off the other pots one after another, and another, and another...

"Eeeeeeeeeepp!!! As if... as if witches could exiiiist!! As if I'd believe iiiiiiiiiit!!"

When the number of arms grew to seven, a loud, shrill laughter split the air.



"If you don't want him, I'll take him, he's all mine!!"
"Wait, I said nooooooooooo!! I'll take him!!"
"Huh?! Wha, whaa?!?! HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!"
""""Kyahahahahahahaha!!!""""





Kuhihihihi, first one wins, first one wins, right?!
Come on, search, search, find her, find her...!
Don't be noticed by the relatives in the dining hall, right?
And don't get noticed by the kids in the guesthouse, right?
Search in silence, kill in silence!
After all, it's still just the first twilight!



Hey, hey, I found her, I found her, she's in the rose garden.
Why's she standing around there without an umbrella?
She's already given up, all mine, all mine, all miiine!
You blockheads can just sit there and watch!
I told you, nooooooo, this one's miiiiiiiiiiiiine!!
Come on, if we take any longer, we'll be scolded by Beatrice-sama!
Let's take care of it all at once!



There, found her, surrounded her!
Come on, let's get along and do it all at once, okay?!
Diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie!!!



BGM: None



"...Wh-What is... this...?"



"...Just what is this... this old hag...?!"
"There's got to be some mistake!! One more time!!"



BGM: Psy-chorus

"...Why can she defend against us?!"
"Move aside! One more time!!!"
"...No matter how often you try, it won't work. This person... is good."
"...I am waiting for that child. Would you mind calling for her?"
"D-Do you really expect us to run errands for you like that?!"



"Beatrice-sama...!"
"...After all, even I have manifested by now. I was certain that you had awakened."
"Ronove, it's been a long time. Yes, truly, a long time."
"This person's talking to Ronove-sama without using 'sama'...!"
"...And... it's been a long time since I've seen you too... Beatrice."
"Sh-She's not even using 'sama' for Beatrice-sama..."



"The previous... Lady Beatrice..."



Then, after she was wrapped in a golden sparkle, she burst and disappeared, and Kumasawa's form was no longer there.



Her hair was long, beautiful, and vividly youthful, and her figure in that elegant dress couldn't possibly have been mistaken for an old lady... No, this looked like a completely different person from Kumasawa.

"...Well, well, Teacher. I never even dreamed that we would meet each other again."
"Yes, neither did I. I certainly never dreamed that my sleep would be disturbed."
"Such a troublesome time for you to awaken. If you'd remained asleep as usual, the first twilight could have ended without much trouble. Or perhaps I should be glad you're here. I was just getting a tad bored."
"...As usual, it seems you're toying with sinless people in a vulgar game. I believe I taught you several times that the power of the Endless Witch mustn't be used to cause people trouble."
"Don't say that, Teacher. Isn't boredom our natural enemy? This is just a little spice to escape from that."
"...Tch. The more the corrosion advances, the stronger my power becomes, and the easier it becomes to summon my minions. But who would have thought it would release the seal on you, Teacher, at the same time..."
"It's precisely because I predicted such a thing would happen... that I slept so very close to where you were. Though, I prayed in my sleep that I would not be woken again. Being reunited with you like this is a very sad thing for me."
"You're as cunning as always, Teacher... *cackle*..."



"...Certainly, Madam Beatrice."
"I have already passed that name on to this child. Come now, step back, furniture girls. I may give warnings a second time, if you did not listen to the first. However, do not expect to receive a third..."
"...Step back, Seven Sisters of Purgatory. If you get dragged into this, only dust will remain..."
"...B-Back, everyone..."



After that, what remained was the Beatrice whose daring expression didn't falter... and the teacher Beatrice, who had given up that name and wore a composed smile...

"Well then, Teacher, what tea shall I prepare for our long-awaited reunion?"
"Let's see. This reunion was longer in coming than the visit of a comet. Perhaps I will accept your hospitality. And if it seems a mistake has been made, I'll have you return my name and the title of Endless Witch."
"*cackle*cackle*! So, even the title of Endless Witch has a license renewal policy?"

ta

Quinn2win fucked around with this message at 14:43 on Dec 13, 2016

SardonicTyrant
Feb 26, 2016

BTICH IM A NEWT
熱くなれ夢みた明日を
必ずいつかつかまえる
走り出せ振り向くことなく
&



:aaaaa:

I definitely did not see that coming.

tiistai
Nov 1, 2012

Solo Melodica
Another weirdo has come!

POOL IS CLOSED
Jul 14, 2011

I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.
Pillbug

SardonicTyrant posted:

:aaaaa:

I definitely did not see that coming.

Yeah. Wow, Kumasawa.

lotus circle
Dec 25, 2012

Jushure Iburu
So don't worry
Turns out everyone is a witch or a demon.

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Forgall
Oct 16, 2012

by Azathoth

lotus circle posted:

Turns out everyone is a witch or a demon.
And then Battler was a zombie.

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