- Iron Prince
- Aug 28, 2005
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Buglord
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Fellahs, go down on your wives, or you will lose them to me, as I beat box on that pussy like Heavy D.
going down on ladies loving rules
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Dec 12, 2016 06:25
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 16, 2024 13:58
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- Melchiresa
- Jun 21, 2006
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Nice guy.
Tries hard.
Loves hot dogs The Game.
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I can't remember if this was already posted in the thread, but berth ell pup reminded me of this from a couple months ago:
My [28f] fiance's [31m] fetish is getting out of control, and it's ruining our wedding planning.
quote:
My [28f] fiance's [31m] fetish is getting out of control, and it's ruining our wedding planning.
I'm using a throwaway account because I'm humiliated about how this has been going.
I have been seeing a wonderful man for two years now. About six months ago he proposed to me, and since then I've been elated. We have eagerly been planning our wedding and things seem to be clicking between us. I said yes to my dress, invited about 75 guests, and our wedding is set for this December.
Here's where things get complicated. My fiance enjoys the idea of me being with other men. And yes, before you ask, he is bisexual. We have played out this fantasy consistently over the past couple of years, and I enjoy it as well... for the most part. Some of the time I don't know what he's thinking with his requests. About a year ago, he asked me to "steal" his credit card and take my other boyfriend to an expensive restaurant, treat him to dinner, and then have sex with him in a good hotel. I did all of this and sent pictures. It drove him wild.
Gradually the fetish began to involve turning him into a "sissy." He would be very submissive around me during sexual times, and ask that I talk about my experiences with other men, past and present. Again, I obliged.
So, again, I don't mind at all. I'm sexually open minded and if it makes him happy, then I'm happy too. But now it's getting completely out of control, and is starting to leak into our wedding planning. He seems to be more excited about using this as a chance to get his rocks off than actually start a life with me.
For instance, early on, he asked if my other boyfriend could walk me down the aisle. Since my father is dead, I was planning on my brother doing it, but he wants my boyfriend to do it instead. Many of our guests know about the nature of our relationship so he said it wouldn't be a big deal, but it was just too weird for me to even consider. I put my foot down and said no. He reluctantly gave up on the idea, although my other boyfriend will be attending (the three of us are also good friends, so it's natural for him to be there).
Later on he suggested that on our wedding night, my boyfriend be the first person to have sex with me when married. He would be in the room, which is not usual but has happened before, and then cuddle up next to me when we were finished. I agreed to this because whatever, I want him to enjoy our wedding night too.
Today was too much. Our venue has a special service (I think it's special at least?) where during the ceremony and beginning of the reception, they will take a video, and then at the end of the reception show it on a big screen matched to music. We have a certain deal of freedom over how they'll arrange the end product, and while it's expensive, we both agreed that it would be a nice touch. At the very end of the credits though, when brainstorming a last goodbye comment, he suddenly suggested that the video end with something like "Now get to your hotel room and prep the bull you sissy."
I feel sick to my stomach. Has his fetish grown so out of control that he wants me to humiliate him in front of all of our friends and family for sexual gratification? He's never been this way, and I love him as much as ever before, but I need to put a stop to this soon and I don't even know how. He gets so excited when ideas like these come up and has gotten angry at me for saying "no" to his other wedding planning ideas too much.
tl;dr: Fiance and I are into hotwifing/roleplaying/sissy fantasizing, he wants to involve this in the wedding, what do I do?
The update was removed and I can't find a cached version, but some highlights from the comments include:
-Possible compromise of putting "berth ell pup" in the slideshow. OP expresses concern that others may google that and find the post. Fiance is undeterred and is rock-hard at the idea.
-OPs fiance being unable to refrain from spankin' it during a therapy session to address the above issue
-The possibility that the fiance suggested she update so he could get off to all the negative poo poo said about him
-OP saying "gently caress this, I'm leaving"
Happy ending? 
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Dec 12, 2016 07:30
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- Gaunab
- Feb 13, 2012
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LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL
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I can't remember if this was already posted in the thread, but berth ell pup reminded me of this from a couple months ago:
My [28f] fiance's [31m] fetish is getting out of control, and it's ruining our wedding planning.
The update was removed and I can't find a cached version, but some highlights from the comments include:
-Possible compromise of putting "berth ell pup" in the slideshow. OP expresses concern that others may google that and find the post. Fiance is undeterred and is rock-hard at the idea.
-OPs fiance being unable to refrain from spankin' it during a therapy session to address the above issue
-The possibility that the fiance suggested she update so he could get off to all the negative poo poo said about him
-OP saying "gently caress this, I'm leaving"
Happy ending?
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3792330&pagenumber=3&perpage=40#post464788879
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Dec 12, 2016 07:50
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- corn on the cop
- Oct 12, 2012
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Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.
― Corey Dostoyevsky
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quote:My girlfriend [25F] and I 27M] made pretty significant plans regarding our future together. I recently found out she has been making plans of her own that don't appear to include me at all.
I don't really know how much you guys can help here...I just don't know what to do and need some insight.
Joan and I met 3 years ago and have been together ever since. Throughout our relationship Joan has always lagged a bit behind me in terms of progression...I was the first to say I love you, she said it months later. I was the first to suggest moving in together, she finally agreed months later. But I also never got the sensation that she wasn't interested in me, so I didn't let it bother me too much. I really don't know if that's relevant, but it's come to mind in all of this.
A while back I started looking into jobs on the west coast (it's the hotspot for my career.) I discussed this at length with Joan. We knew the pros: it would be amazing for my career, it was a new place/adventure, all that stuff. As well as the cons. I made it clear that I wouldn't go unless Joan wanted to go, as well. She assured me that it was what she wanted and she would move with me, that it wouldn't be hard for her to find a new job and she was excited for a change. So I applied to several jobs and was hired at an absolutely amazing place. This was finalized at the end of November, with me starting in the new year. I put in my notice, Joan put in hers and started the job hunt. While I was in California for the interview I even signed a lease for an apartment (Joan and I had agreed that I would if I was hired before I left.)
It all sounds like Joan is completely on board, right? Well, on Friday Joan and I were out doing some shopping when we ran into a coworker of hers. The coworker got really excited and gave her a hug, talking about how happy she was that Joan had decided not to leave the company. Once she was gone, I asked Joan what she meant.
And that's when it all came out. Earlier in the week Joan informed her boss that she wasn't leaving. She then rented an apartment in the area, for just herself. She had decided she didn't want to move to California. I asked her if this meant we were breaking up (because to me that's a pretty big "gently caress you"), and she said she wasn't sure, but "probably not."
I don't know what to think. In the past two days we talked about it from every angle. I've pleaded with her to reconsider, she's asked me to stay here. She says she's happy to do long distance and "see how it works out."
I'm lost. I don't want to break up with her. I thought this was the girl I was going to marry. We'd definitely talked about it, and I was even thinking of proposing once we settled down from the move. But I also don't want to do long distance, especially since she doesn't know if she'll ever want to move to California. And I'm deadset on moving there myself. It's just the best move for me right now.
What the hell do I do? Am I being dumb for even considering staying with her? I feel so betrayed, especially since she didn't tell me. She said she was going to, but we were set to move right after Christmas. She wasn't giving herself a whole lot of time. I'm just completely torn.
tl;dr: My girlfriend and I planned together to move cross-country to California. Everything was set in place when she decided (without telling me) that she wasn't going. She doesn't want to break up but absolutely is not moving. I'm deadset on going, and completely torn.
pretty open and shut case of "please break up with me"
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Dec 12, 2016 09:18
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- Griefor
- Jun 11, 2009
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pretty open and shut case of "please break up with me"
Yeah at the beginning of his post he even says he's the first to take steps in the relationship and she's definitely pushing him to be the first to say "I'm breaking up with you". A fitting end.
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Dec 12, 2016 10:48
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- tactlessbastard
- Feb 4, 2001
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Godspeed, post
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Fun Shoe
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He should definitely quit the new job, abandon his career, and double down on making it work Joan.
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Dec 12, 2016 11:43
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- mania
- Sep 9, 2004
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From legaladvice
quote:
I hosed up. I know I did and I regret filing for divorce. I'm talking to my lawyer next week but I need to know what to do in the meantime
Like I said I messed up and I know it. I need to know what I can do to fix it: My wife had a baby in May. My cousin was a victim of paternity fraud and I had this stupid idea to secretly do a test so I did one over the internet.
It was a stupid idea. The test said I wasn't the father and I filed for divorce a month after the birth.
But I didn't tell my wife about the test. She had no idea. I asked for the court to do a test because I knew the one I did couldn't be used in court and my wife didn't know about that one. The court test said I was the father.
I thought it was wrong and the court let my lawyer pick a lab and the test from that lab said I was also the father. Also when I thought my wife cheated I looked for proof and my lawyer had a private investigator but we could find any and now we know why.
I want to call of the divorce and am going to talk to my lawyer about it. I haven't talked to my wife without a lawyer or seen my daughter in 5.5 months. I went to see her but she called the cops and said she is going thru with the divorce.
If I call it off and withdraw the paperwork can see do this? I want to start seeing my daughter but my wife said before the cops came. I tried to give her some money but she gave it back to the cops and they told me she said that she has been living without my support since I left and doesn't need it now.
I hate myself for being so stupid.
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Dec 12, 2016 12:41
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- Griefor
- Jun 11, 2009
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Awesome, it's like the plot twist from open relationship posts in a different genre.
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Dec 12, 2016 13:27
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- corn on the cop
- Oct 12, 2012
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Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.
― Corey Dostoyevsky
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how the gently caress do you even do an online paternity test?
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Dec 12, 2016 13:29
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- Griefor
- Jun 11, 2009
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code:function test() {
var rng = Math.floor((Math.random() * 10) + 1);
if (rng == 1) {
alert("you're not the dad lol");
}
}
Awesome I'm not the dad, time to download some RAM.
EDIT:
i hope that's a dressed up way to say ' he asked 4chan '
In my head this is him posting a picture of himself and his baby with a poll "Is this the father of this child? Y/N"
Griefor fucked around with this message at 13:36 on Dec 12, 2016
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Dec 12, 2016 13:34
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- Pvt.Scott
- Feb 16, 2007
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What God wants, God gets, God help us all
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I'm guessing it's some internet service where you mail in a couple hair samples or something and they just wait a week and then send you a one word message, "no." I mean, its a good bet that if you're getting backalley paternity tests that you're pretty convinced the kid isn't yours, so the trust in the relationship is gone regardless of any actual infidelity. It's for the best.
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Dec 12, 2016 13:50
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- ziasquinn
- Jan 1, 2006
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Fallen Rib
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That poor OCD /MANIC moron
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Dec 12, 2016 13:59
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- corn on the cop
- Oct 12, 2012
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Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.
― Corey Dostoyevsky
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I'm guessing it's some internet service where you mail in a couple hair samples or something and they just wait a week and then send you a one word message, "no." I mean, its a good bet that if you're getting backalley paternity tests that you're pretty convinced the kid isn't yours, so the trust in the relationship is gone regardless of any actual infidelity. It's for the best.
in the end, providing a charitable service.
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Dec 12, 2016 14:01
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- loquacius
- Oct 21, 2008
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No its funnier if he makes her say it first
How would he do that though, he's working on such a tight schedule
Maybe he should try writing up a group Facebook message to her and a couple of lesbians asking for a foursome
(if this wasn't a Seinfeld episode it should be)
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Dec 12, 2016 14:05
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- WAY TO GO WAMPA!!
- Oct 27, 2007
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it's like that episode of Black Mirror with the memory implant but it's main character is ridiculously stupid
Older sibling (29 M) pulled knife on me (26 M)quote:My older sibling (29 M) pulled a knife on me(26m)a few months ago, which led to 12 stitches and 2 surgeries.
To give a little background, my brother has always been very protective, but critical of me. In our younger days he bossed me around quite a bit (i.e. doing his chores, fetching him things, etc.) and threatening/beating me on a regular basis. Name calling, like fg, rtard, stupid, worthless, weak, p*ssy, etc. was commonplace. I never spoke up or fought back, primarily because I was taught to respect my brother and elders (I am of Asian Descent). Things have gotten better as we got older. I began to see him as a friend, though the occasional bossing around and name calling still happens, but I always believed he had good intentions.
Things changed earlier this year, however, once I stood up to him after he made a scene at the airport in front of both strangers and our mother. He humiliated me in public, called me vulgar and mean things and pushed me. I asked him not to touch me or talk to me in an aggressive way ever again once we left, which led to him telling me to gently caress off and that he was done with me. Obviously this hurt, but I've tried to reconcile/open up dialogue to move past this. However, he never apologized or even tried to discuss what happened any further with me.
Despite it all, my sister in law invited me over for dinner a few weeks later to thank me for watching their dog while they went to Spain (this was after the airport incident).I decided that maybe it would be a good chance for us to talk and get past this so I agree.
I bring my dog over and help sis in law finish prepping dinner while my brother is watching TV. He mentions that my pup (a 11 week old Lab mix) is too rough with his dog (a bit older than my dog). I disagree as his dog kept coming back to mine to play. He is offended by this and tells me to "get the f*ck out of his house". Keep in mind I had been here for a sum total of 15 minutes, but I say whatever and head out to avoid another confrontation. As I'm heading out he continues to say mean and foul things about both me and my pup. I decide I've had enough and demand that he tell me what his problem is with me and offer him a free swing at me if that would make him feel better. Instead he pulls out a knife and points it straight at my gut and tells me to get the f out. At this point I grab the knife and yank it out of his hand. I ended up with 12 stitches on my hand and tendon/nerve damage on my fingers in addition to several cuts on my chest and torso. When I threw the knife on the floor he still wanted me out. I got into an ER with my sis in law and that was the last time I saw him.
What do I do? Nobody in my family but my sis in law knows what happened. This happened 3 months ago and I cannot sleep or think straight because I have so much anger and hate in my heart (my middle finger may be permanently damaged, meaning I can no longer do some of my favorite activities).My parents are overseas and they keep asking me to forgive him. They know about his abusive behaviors in the past as well as the airport incident but do not know about the knife incident. I don't want to tell them because I don't want them to worry since it won't do them much good overseas. In all honesty, I would like to remain in no contact, but now family reunions etc. will require some finesse as I do not want to be in the same room as him. I don't want to isolate myself from my family and am not sure what to do.
TL;DR: brother (29M) pulled knife on me (26M) for no reason. Not sure if I should tell my family or isolate myself from any get togethers.
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Dec 12, 2016 16:34
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- WampaLord
- Jan 14, 2010
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How did he get cuts on his chest/torso?
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Dec 12, 2016 16:42
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- Pvt.Scott
- Feb 16, 2007
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What God wants, God gets, God help us all
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in the end, providing a charitable service.
That's how I'd justify it if I were running something like that, yeah. Basically providing relationship counseling services through deceit.
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Dec 12, 2016 16:47
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Elizabeth Holmes' new business going well!
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Dec 12, 2016 16:56
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- Jeza
- Feb 13, 2011
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The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.
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Why would you not tell your family? Seems like pretty pertinent information that your brother pulled a knife on you over an unbelievably trivial thing and ended up permanently damaging your hand.
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Dec 12, 2016 17:15
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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pretty open and shut case of "please break up with me"
That tactic is the weakest poo poo on Earth and drives me insane. People are such loving weenies.
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Dec 12, 2016 17:16
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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no but you can watch people do this in realtime
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Dec 12, 2016 17:31
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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if a movie like that ever existed, it has probably been focus-tested to have them end up together
they have a kid at the end
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Dec 12, 2016 17:34
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- loquacius
- Oct 21, 2008
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There was that sequence from The Graduate where the main character is pressured into going on a date with Mrs Robinson's daughter but has no interest in her so he takes her on the worst date possible so she'll leave him alone
but he loses his nerve halfway through and they End Up Together
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Dec 12, 2016 17:36
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 16, 2024 13:58
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- TROIKA CURES GREEK
- Jun 30, 2015
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by R. Guyovich
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I dunno, I feel like runnign away is probably a better option especially if the person wielding the knife is telling you to get out of their home
It is, trying to grab it unless you are highly trained in disarming someone is incredibly stupid.
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Dec 12, 2016 17:36
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Dec 12, 2016 06:25
Tater Love 
