54 40 or gently caress posted:

That's a tricky one because he might not be crazy about the look/feel but she might have dealt with a lot of body insecurity surrounding them. So the question I guess is her happiness with herself more important than his happiness with her body. Spending their savings is super hosed though, and she must have missed the memo that having big boobs sucks a lot

Demon Of The Fall posted:

Doesn't it take several weeks recovery after a major surgery like that? I don't understand how she went away on vacation, had the surgery, and then was walking around an airport and flying around with a chest wrapped up and swelling and probably lots of pain.

Demon Of The Fall posted:

Doesn't it take several weeks recovery after a major surgery like that? I don't understand how she went away on vacation, had the surgery, and then was walking around an airport and flying around with a chest wrapped up and swelling and probably lots of pain.

quote:

Ok so a few months ago my brother made a friend at school. Let's call him Peter . He seemed really cool. We both like video games, generic pop music, and are both waiting for marriage to have sex. You can see from my previous post on here that I had some bad luck with an rear end in a top hat. I actually got the good-guy vibe and started to develop feelings for Peter. I have my brother talk to him for me and found out that he felt the same way. He told me that he wasn't ready for a relationship though, because he recently lost his grandmother and felt emotionally unstable. I understood where he was coming from and let it go. We continue to hang out like normal, except I did pick up a flirtatious feel in the air, but I'm not sure if it was just an optimistic assumption.

I have this friend, we'll call him Steven , who is homosexual. I hardly ever talk about crushes, so he was very surprised when I confided in him about my feelings for Peter. He was also touched when I said he was the first one I told. He began to talk me up in front of Peter, like complimenting my bust size and talking about how funny I am. I felt really lucky to have a brother and friend help me out so much.

So a couple of nights ago, Steven, my brother, and I got drunk. Peter didn't get hammered with us because he doesn't drink, but he was there. I ended up being the first to fall asleep. The next morning I heard Peter and my brother talking, and that's when they told me that Steven sucked Peter's dick that night. I was too shocked to give a real reaction. I ended up laughing it off and making jokes. After some time of idle chit chat, I notice Peter seems to be in a good mood. It made me think of anime where they say the girl looks cuter the day after she sleeps with the main guy. I'm not sure if he was actually in a particularly good mood or if it's just my bitter interpretation of it.

Later in the day, Steven came by to smoke and I acted clueless about what had happened between him and Peter. I lightly talked about the night before saying how I had fun and woke up really thirsty. He gave me a quick explanation of what him and my brother talked about after I left. Then he ended it very abruptly saying he went straight to sleep afterwards. His eye contact was strong, but I felt him trying to read my face. I assumed it was him trying to see if I believe him, but I'm not sure. I sometimes over think people's reactions and end up clouding my own judgement.

He left the room and I heard Steven and my brother talking about it. That’s when I entered the room. Steven noticed me come in but was too engulfed in what was happening to pay me too much attention. Then, Steven pulled me aside and apologized quite a bit and insisted that he leave. I told him it wasn't necessary and that everything is fine. He asked if I was sure. I said yes. I tried to lighten the mood by asking about dick size. He didn't find it funny. He put his face into his hands. I asked him if he needed a hug. He said please no. I gave him one anyway and told him I loved him, and I heard a whimper on the word love. He apologized again, and I assured him with a smile that everything is ok.

Peter left around that time. I ended up going on my computer to do work, and met up with Steven later for a few beers. More people were supposed to be there, but something came up, so it was just us. He asked if we're friends, which is something he does a lot. So I responded with the usual response, "so what's the problem? Let me borrow the top" we have a small chuckle and he rephrased the question saying "are we still best friends?" There was a silence and I respond the same as the previous question. He made a pained expression. I think he already had a feeling, but this is the moment he knew things would be different.

After a can or two, he asked something along the lines of "Is this the end?" It was so sudden, the response that naturally came out was "what?" Which then he changed the question to "want to sing a song?" (Because we often karaoke together). I pretend I heard nothing and sing the song with him. Then he puts on house music and we have a conversation about how it sounded like porn music. Eventually, I told him I'm going to the swap meet in the morning and can't be up too late. Before I go to bed he said thank you. I said “for what?” And he responded with "for everything"

I know that Steven was drunk and I can tell just how hurt he is by his own actions. I don't want us to stop being friends over this so I feel like there's no point getting mad, because it would just cause more drama. But now I feel super awkward around Peter. When I see him I just see Steven blowing him. Peter even said he liked me but then he's over there getting blown by someone else. It's like my feelings were never thought of. No one was thinking "oh yeah she likes me" or "oh yeah she likes him" it was just about getting off, which disgusted me all the more. However, I understand that technically Peter and I aren't together, therefore I don't really have the right to get mad at him for this. I don't mind being his friend but I'm having second thoughts about wanting him as more than that. I don't want to be mad at Steven because I want us to stay friends but at the same time I feel like I should be more mad because he ruined a possible development between Peter and I.

But part of me thinks it might be for the best, because I already had a slight feeling that Peter’s confession was a mixture of the pressure of my brother’s questions (about Peter’s feelings for me) and the pity he felt for me having feelings for him. Then again, this might just be me overthinking again.

TL;DR Me and my crush found out we have mutual affections. He let my gay best friend blow him, and now I'm instantly turned off. Not sure if I'm in the right to be more upset, and wondering if my crush ever had feelings for me in the first place.

edit: Forgot to mention that Peter is pansexual.

edit2: Lol Peter Pan-sexual.

La Brea Carpet posted:

Don't go to Tijuana for your boob job, which is what I'm guessing happened.

scrubs season six posted:

B sized boobies on a thin/fit/normal woman are awesome but B sized boobies on a woman that's 30 pounds overweight usually is not a good look.

So if she's fit then she's a monster and has destroyed something beautiful. If she's fat then I don't really blame her.

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

My [20 F] gay best friend [24 M] of two years gave a blow job to my crush [18 M]
this is like a tumblr strawman come to life

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

After some time of idle chit chat, I notice Peter seems to be in a good mood. It made me think of anime where they say the girl looks cuter the day after she sleeps with the main guy. I'm not sure if he was actually in a particularly good mood or if it's just my bitter interpretation of it. 

go go go go ROSCOE! posted:

I'm not sure if getting a boob job in Tijuana would drain ~70% out of your savings account

monkeytennis posted:

Yeah, this.

Ultimately if she's uncomfortable with how she looks and/or feels that's going to have an effect on sexytimes. They're still intimate so she clearly (I think) still wants to be with him, at least for now.
Maybe he could have been a bit more engaged with her feelings about her body image and they could have come to an agreement beforehand. It's a bit out of order spending their savings on the implants though.

I wonder how big they actually are to have such a negative effect on him.

'I'm not shagging you, I don't like your tits' said NO MAN EVER.

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

My [20 F] gay best friend [24 M] of two years gave a blow job to my crush [18 M]

quote:

We both like video games, generic pop music, and are both waiting for marriage to have sex.

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

While I sympathize wholeheartedly with body image issues and poor self-esteem resulting from that, what kind of crazy as heck idiot decides to spend 70% of her and her husband's combined savings on elective enhancement surgery without his consent?!! It's her body and ultimately her decision etc, but all of that sympathy goes out the window when his wife didn't discuss this with him at all and went behind his back to do it. It seems like a very close secondary reason why dude's wife decided to get breast implants is because of her wacko sister's influence too. Just comical. How do these people function on a day-to-day basis with such horrid judgment?

Agentdark posted:

Honestly I would be far more angry about the 70% of the savings then the actual surgery.

Pvt.Scott posted:

I legit feel bad for big ladies with tiny breasts. You poor, poor women. You lost the genetic lottery on that one. Your literal, dedicated fat deposits have betrayed you. feels bad, man.

Agentdark posted:

Honestly I would be far more angry about the 70% of the savings then the actual surgery.

Andrast posted:

Pretty much. That's a pretty serious breach of trust and might lead to a divorce if it was me.

Pvt.Scott posted:

I legit feel bad for big ladies with tiny breasts. You poor, poor women. You lost the genetic lottery on that one. Your literal, dedicated fat deposits have betrayed you. feels bad, man.

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

My [20 F] gay best friend [24 M] of two years gave a blow job to my crush [18 M]
this is like a tumblr strawman come to life

quote:

Me [30 F] with my brother [25 M]. He is an extreme weeaboo and it is runing his life.

Please forgive the tone of this post, I'm extremely frustrated with this situation.

My sibling and I were extremely close in childhood until his teenage years when he got heavy into computer gaming and it basically took over his life and became an addiction. I am talking literally his only activity/hobby, never leaving his room, up at all hours playing games, no socialization outside of the gaming etc. My spouse and I also game (a reasonable amount) so this isn't a gamer-hate post. Just to be clear. Also for reference, we are white.

Anyway, this has gone on for years and years and my parents enable him saying that's "just the way he is", "you can't change him now" and so on. He is morbidly obese, doesn't do personal hygiene, doesn't go outside, has no life whatsoever besides his job and anime/games.
He is like the most hardcore fedora-wearing, cheetos and mountain dew, pissing in 2 liters so as not to miss a minute of games stereotype you could imagine. Literally the walking, talking breathing version of everything the phrase "weeaboo neckbeard" conjures up.
He has had plenty of GFs in his past and when he takes care of himself he has no problem with women at all. Underneath all the neckbeard weeaboo stuff (and the weight he's put on from his sedentary lifestyle) he is actually a pretty objectively good looking and interesting dude. He is insightful and funny and was a very good partner to his previous girlfriends so it's not as though he's a person who is beyond help.

He has this delusion that he is going to find a subservient Japanese waifu somewhere but the reality is that he doesn't go outside, and doesn't talk to women (or anyone). There are plenty of eligible bachelorettes around our area - some of which share the same interests as he does - but he refuses to acknowledge they exist: "there's nobody like me here", and refuses to make any social effort to try and meet them. Also most of them are white so he isn't interested. If they aren't meeting over online in-game chats then he isn't meeting them.

To make matters worse, his situation which (in my opinion) is almost entirely self-imposed depresses the poo poo out of him. Every suggestion that gets made to help him, there is an excuse. He can't do calorie logging to lose weight because it's "too western". He can't socialize with his coworkers because he deliberately alienates them by speaking Japanese (poorly) all the time. He can't do x, he can't do y and it's all because it isn't Japan Japan Japan.
There is also an obvious resentment toward women for not jumping all over his dick but I don't see how they possibly could since they don't know he is alive - his life is 24/7 in his house playing games and watching anime.

He is literally wasting the best years of his life on this and is considering going nuclear and ruining his stable, well paying job and living situation by moving away to find this imaginary 10/10 Japanese woman who will microwave his chicken tenders for him while he sits on his rear end and plays league of legends, while not minding being fetishized for her race. Unfortunately, if he does quit his job and move, he will just be sitting in his house masturbating to hentai without a support system, and that is frightening to me as he is clearly emotionally unstable.
Is there any way for me to reason with him? Is there anything I can do to help him realize how unhealthy this lifestyle is for him? As bummed as he is about his situation, it is intertwined with a strange superiority complex over people with normal habits and hobbies that makes it very difficult to approach him. I'm afraid that he is going to die young - from the sedentary lifestyle/obesity/etc and alone - from the unwillingness to even try and meet people.

Everything I suggest to improve his situation is met with extreme resistance or excuses. For example: when I suggested body-weight workouts in the house (because he "can't" go to the gym given that it would require him to leave his computer behind for an hour a day) he said he can't work out at home because he's "too busy".

I want to help him so badly but he is just sucked into the vortex.

TLDR: My otherwise very cool and enjoyable sibling has slowly morphed into a "neckbeard weeaboo" and seems to be living in a world of delusion. He often comes to me complaining about his piss-poor quality of life but everything I suggest to help him he refuses. I don't want him to continue down this path of isolation and self destruction. Anything I can do? Anyone with experience with this?

quote:

In my defense, I never said yes. I thought officiating a wedding in a strapless gown was highly inappropriate and I don't even believe in god. Although I don't find that dichotomy (clarification: Atheist Minister) inappropriate. Being a bridesmaid was not something I was formally asked to do and it cost me over 1,200 dollars, because weddings are stupid and I hate them. In her defense, it ended up not being strapless. We've been "friendly coworkers" for almost 10 years and friends for about 5.

I dragged my feet through the process, that I will admit. I wasn't into the dress shopping, I couldn't attend the bridal shower because it was during a major work event in the middle of summer. I couldn't go to the bachelorette because they changed the plan the week before to a one-night in Atlantic City instead of a two-night, three-day on a beach in Delaware. Though I still paid full bridesmaid share for both of those things. When the time came to prepare my speech with the couple, she bitched me out for having less time to meet than we originally planned. I wrote a kickass speech because that's what I do best, and the wedding came and went and was just as delightful as it was unnecessarily expensive and unoriginal.

It's important to make the point that I'm not bitter or single, I just really hate modern weddings. It's basically rude to invite someone to your wedding these days. It costs like 350 on the low end if you are just a guest! Tack on the shower, bachelor/ette, plus if they're super excited about their life, the engagement party. Like, I'm sorry. Can you just have one party please and can I wear a sundress I already have? Oh, ok I'll buy a dress. And shoes. And a gift. And a hotel room. And and and...

Ok here's the meat of this post: since the wedding, I haven't sent the gift I bought her, which is a really nice pressure cooker, with instructions on how to use it written by me, with photos I took. Sort of a personalized booklet on how to use something she definitely has never used. I fully intend to send this gift, and I do have a year and it's only been six weeks since their wedding and the holidays just happened.

But what's weird is, since the wedding (since before even) I haven't spoken to her. I hadn't spoken to her pretty much all year UNLESS it was about something having to do with her wedding. I can't tell you the last time she asked me what was going on with my life. She never even thanked me for marrying her and her husband, for christ's sake and that pun was entirely intended.

So am I like a total bitch for not sending a gift yet? Is the "you have a year" rule well known enough for me to take my time? Or do I just seem like a disinterested monster who hates weddings? Eep. Not sure how much I care but I just FEEL like I'm more on the right side than the wrong one. Plus, the more time that goes by without word from her is....awkward. When I do send a gift if she starts talking to me again, how do I digest that?

TL;DR I officiated a girlfriends wedding and stood as a bridesmaid against better judgement. Was unable to attend most pre-wedding events. Bride stopped talking to me well before the wedding and hasn't at all since. I haven't sent her gift yet but I did buy one. How much of a bitch am I for waiting so long?

La Brea Carpet posted:

LOL all the comments are telling her to encourage her brother to go to Japan to crash and burn.

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

She's NOT bitter!!

Leon Einstein posted:

Never heard of that 1 year window for gift giving, especially if you're literally at the wedding.

quote:

My husband (35m) found out a secret about his sister (21) and he is devastated- how to comfort?

So my sister in law has been regularly featuring in porn and webcam shows since she was about 19. I've known about it but the rest of her family (her mom, 2 older brothers) have no idea. She told me about it herself, but asked me specifically not to tell anyone so I have kept her promise.

She is now 21 and was working as a legal assistant off and on for a few years, but suddenly announced that she was quitting and moving to California (basically for more work under her agency.) Understandably, my husband, her brother, was concerned and asked her why she is randomly quitting, and what is she going to do there? She got very defensive and evasive and said she has friends there, and my husband kept grilling her about what she's going to do for money, rent, etc. She eventually blew up at him and screamed that she's going to be an actress, but my husband figured out what she meant and asked her if she's doing porn, and she acknowledged it and said, yeah I am and it's not a big deal.

He didn't really push her on it after that and after she left, he and I talked and he started welling up and almost cried because he said he felt like he failed her. I've never seen him cry before. He also said he's going to leave her alone since that's her decision and her life but he is extremely depressed right now and I don't know how to comfort him. He asked me if I knew and I said yes and he just sighed and wouldn't really talk about it anymore. I think his sister is pretty embarrassed also, and the last thing she said to me was "this is why I didn't want anyone to know because no one would understand." I told her that it's okay and he will be okay eventually.

tldr - My husband found out his sister was doing porn and is really upset about it right now. How should I comfort him?

Gaunab posted: