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Scruff McGruff
Feb 13, 2007

Jesus, kid, you're almost a detective. All you need now is a gun, a gut, and three ex-wives.


The reason is because people like you buy into it without checking it out.

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Cerepol
Dec 2, 2011


Scruff McGruff posted:



The reason is because people like you buy into it without checking it out.

Holy poo poo, is this someone maybe learning something?!?!

jivjov
Sep 13, 2007

But how does it taste? Yummy!
Dinosaur Gum
I'm not even going to bother to screencap the discussion...but why is it that half the time when you call out someone on something lovely they say on social media you get back a response along the lines of "shouldn't you be at work" or "why don't you go back to playing video games and leave me alone". Like...can people seriously not conceive of someone not having a 9-5, M-F work schedule?

Gounads
Mar 13, 2013

Where am I?
How did I get here?

jivjov posted:

I'm not even going to bother to screencap the discussion...but why is it that half the time when you call out someone on something lovely they say on social media you get back a response along the lines of "shouldn't you be at work" or "why don't you go back to playing video games and leave me alone". Like...can people seriously not conceive of someone not having a 9-5, M-F work schedule?

Also, why aren't they at work?

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin

Gounads posted:

Also, why aren't they at work?

They're on disability because of their bad back and it's Obama's fault.

Scruff McGruff
Feb 13, 2007

Jesus, kid, you're almost a detective. All you need now is a gun, a gut, and three ex-wives.

Dr. Arbitrary posted:

They're on disability because of their bad back and it's Obama's fault.

Keep the gubmint out of my welfare! :argh:

Dr Christmas
Apr 24, 2010

Berninating the one percent,
Berninating the Wall St.
Berninating all the people
In their high rise penthouses!
🔥😱🔥🔫👴🏻

TinTower posted:


making GBS threads

Of course this person sees no irony with voting for Trump, who explicitly, proudly did in the Miss Teen USA dressing rooms what they've only speculated transgender people might do.

TGLT
Aug 14, 2009

Defenestration posted:

Littlefinger the character is...not known for either of those things

He's holding up a cup of some sort, and is smug looking? So clearly he's right, and also therefor agrees with me?? Didn't think of that did you??? Maybe I'll use Stannis next time????

Or maybe the person just wants some gullible people of their own to manipulate.

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal

Dr Christmas posted:

Of course this person sees no irony with voting for Trump, who explicitly, proudly did in the Miss Teen USA dressing rooms what they've only speculated transgender people might do.
It looks like they're mostly worried about the making GBS threads, for some odd reason. Did Trump poo poo in the Miss Teen USA dressing rooms?

Mo_Steel
Mar 7, 2008

Let's Clock Into The Sunset Together

Fun Shoe

Guavanaut posted:

This one falls spectacularly flat. At least the ones fearmongering about perverts in flasher macs saying 'I identify as a woman' while exposing themselves to children have a bad thing happening, even if it's largely bullshit. A young boy shits in the girls' bathroom. Then what?

The dead rising from the grave! Girls and boys, making GBS threads in the same bathroom! Mass hysteria!

Samfucius
Sep 8, 2010

And if you gaze long enough into a nest, the nest will gaze back into you.
I know this gets requested pretty often, but where's that longer post/story about a man who wakes up and uses subsidized utilities and public roads and then bitches about taxes

Rick_Hunter
Jan 5, 2004

My guys are still fighting the hard fight!
(weapons, shields and drones are still online!)

Samfucius posted:

I know this gets requested pretty often, but where's that longer post/story about a man who wakes up and uses subsidized utilities and public roads and then bitches about taxes



Best I could find.

Duke Igthorn
Oct 11, 2012

by FactsAreUseless

Cerepol posted:

Holy poo poo, is this someone maybe learning something?!?!

"OBUMMER gave himself a medal!"
"No, he didn't *relevant link*"
"Yeah, but OBUMMER gave HIMSELF a medal!"
"No, seriously: no he did not."
"Oh. But that's just the kind of thing he WOULD do so, in essence, OBUMMER GAVE HIMSELF A MEDAL!!"

From the Freep "I know this is a photoshop but it feels like it reflects reality" file.

Klaus88
Jan 23, 2011

Violence has its own economy, therefore be thoughtful and precise in your investment

Duke Igthorn posted:

"OBUMMER gave himself a medal!"
"No, he didn't *relevant link*"
"Yeah, but OBUMMER gave HIMSELF a medal!"
"No, seriously: no he did not."
"Oh. But that's just the kind of thing he WOULD do so, in essence, OBUMMER GAVE HIMSELF A MEDAL!!"

From the Freep "I know this is a photoshop but it feels like it reflects reality" file.

"I REJECT YOUR REALITY AND SUBSITUTE MY OWN!" :arghfist:::corsair:

TinTower
Apr 21, 2010

You don't have to 8e a good person to 8e a hero.

Guavanaut posted:

It looks like they're mostly worried about the making GBS threads, for some odd reason. Did Trump poo poo in the Miss Teen USA dressing rooms?

At least we know who Seaside Loafer really is.

Twelve by Pies
May 4, 2012

Again a very likpatous story

My god! That man is having a heart attack! *pulls out bible* Hello, 911? 911, I need an ambulance! gently caress, why isn't it working?!

Unless they're saying that I should instead rush over to the man's side and start reading him passages in an attempt to save his soul, which is equally as bad.

Prism
Dec 22, 2007

yospos
Well, the Bible doesn't change itself, as far as I know, so it probably isn't as novel as me checking the news/texting people/etc. Also, I can't shitpost on it.

Vargatron
Apr 19, 2008

MRAZZLE DAZZLE


Re: "Where were you when the planes hit"

I was 12 years old in middle school school going in between classes to Science and that's when the first plane hit. By the time I got to English class they had TVs wheeled in on CNN showing the towers hit and collapsed. We watched the whole thing go down back to front but the teachers allowed kids to go out into the hall if they wanted to. I remember one girl crying because her cousin worked at the WTC so that unnerved the gently caress out of us. This was in a middle school in rural South Carolina and it didn't really feel all real to me. My brother was like 21 at the time and he was telling me he basically broke down and cried in the car on the way home from work that day. I think the biggest thing was that it proved America was vulnerable and nobody really faced that reality up until now.

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal

Prism posted:

Well, the Bible doesn't change itself, as far as I know, so it probably isn't as novel as me checking the news/texting people/etc. Also, I can't shitpost on it.
Oh you can, you just need a signboard, a PA amp, and a public space.

kartikeya
Mar 17, 2009



Used to work at a call center that did customer service for a cell phone company, so this one is particularly hilarious. Let's see:

Dropped it in the toilet/pool/ran over it with your truck?

Stole it?

Threw it at your boyfriend?

Nuked it in the microwave?

Wrapped stereo wire around it and then plugged the wire into the electric outlet?

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal

kartikeya posted:

Wrapped stereo wire around it and then plugged the wire into the electric outlet?
I... what?

Were they attempting wireless charging? EMP? Just bored?

kartikeya
Mar 17, 2009


Guavanaut posted:

I... what?

Were they attempting wireless charging? EMP? Just bored?

Apparently, their charger wasn't working. Instead of calling us for a new one (it probably would have been free, I think this phone was within the warranty), they decided to be, uh...creative. They took the battery off the back of the phone, wrapped stereo wire around the little metal nodes there, and then plugged the other end of the wire directly into the outlet. They called us when their phone started smoking.

This is also why the other guy nuked his phone in the microwave. Surely that will recharge it, right?

The best part of working the night shift there (it was, at least at the time, I don't know about now, a 24 hour service line), was that you'd get very, very few calls after midnight, but the ones you did get were either very fast or insane.

ChristopherRobin
Feb 27, 2011

Corgis with attitude.


Oh God. That person at every church function is the worst. That person that either tries to turn every joke into a bible lesson, or tries to make everyone feel bad for being excited or interested in anything not related to church.

"The Superbowl sure is fun, but what if we got as excited about church and the bible as we did about the Superbowl?"

Prism
Dec 22, 2007

yospos

Guavanaut posted:

Oh you can, you just need a signboard, a PA amp, and a public space.

That's with it, not on it. :colbert:

World Famous W
May 25, 2007

BAAAAAAAAAAAA

Samfucius posted:

I know this gets requested pretty often, but where's that longer post/story about a man who wakes up and uses subsidized utilities and public roads and then bitches about taxes

Rick_Hunter posted:



Best I could find.
Here a non image version:



This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US Department of Energy. I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the municipal water utility. After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the National Weather Service of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration determined the weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and launched by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. I watched this while eating breakfast of US Department of Agriculture inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the Food and Drug Administration.

At the appropriate time as regulated by the US Congress and kept accurate by the National Institute of Standards and Technology and the US Naval Observatory. I get into my National Highway Traffic Safety Administration approved automobile and set out to work on the roads built by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the Environmental Protection Agency, using legal tender issued by the Federal Reserve bank. On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to send via the US Postal Service and drop the kids off at the public school.

After work, I drive my NHTSA car back home on the DOT roads, to a house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and fire marshal’s inspection, and which has not been plundered of all it’s valuables thanks to the local police department.

I then log on to the internet which was developed by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Administration and post on freerepublic.com and Fox News forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can’t do anything right.

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin
Man, apparently there's a video of a disabled person being tortured and some of the progressive people I met over the last year are analyzing it because they think it might be faked.

I don't even know where to begin, and I don't particularly want to watch the video.

Joshmo
Aug 22, 2007

Dr. Arbitrary posted:

Man, apparently there's a video of a disabled person being tortured and some of the progressive people I met over the last year are analyzing it because they think it might be faked.

I don't even know where to begin, and I don't particularly want to watch the video.

I'm in the same boat. I've seen it posted a half dozen times already and my phone's telling me to watch it on YouTube and I'm like, even if it's fake, I'm not watching some poor soul get tortured. I'll read about a week from now when more facts than none at all are established to some degree of certainty.

Shadin
Jun 28, 2009

Dr. Arbitrary posted:

Man, apparently there's a video of a disabled person being tortured and some of the progressive people I met over the last year are analyzing it because they think it might be faked.

I don't even know where to begin, and I don't particularly want to watch the video.

Like, they know about the police involvement and everything and are still analyzing it? That's hosed up.

I researched it quickly to see if it was legit but only because I only heard about it from my local work Trump supporter spouting off about it as an example of how white racism isn't a thing because black racism exists.

ToxicSlurpee
Nov 5, 2003

-=SEND HELP=-


Pillbug

jivjov posted:

I'm not even going to bother to screencap the discussion...but why is it that half the time when you call out someone on something lovely they say on social media you get back a response along the lines of "shouldn't you be at work" or "why don't you go back to playing video games and leave me alone". Like...can people seriously not conceive of someone not having a 9-5, M-F work schedule?

Or assuming that people that do have a 9-5 schedule are working literally the whole time. Maybe you're on break or on lunch. Maybe you have one of those jobs with some downtime. Maybe you're like, say, an emergency response person whose job is to sit around and wait for things to catch fire. That's why you get the movie images of firemen playing cards until the bell rings. If nothing is on fire they often have nothing to do. Bell rings, they jump up and go put the fire out. That is literally their job. Sit around and wait for something to break.

I mean there are slow days at work and everybody has social media on their phones these days so what's the problem if they access it sometimes?

Dameius
Apr 3, 2006

ToxicSlurpee posted:

Or assuming that people that do have a 9-5 schedule are working literally the whole time. Maybe you're on break or on lunch. Maybe you have one of those jobs with some downtime. Maybe you're like, say, an emergency response person whose job is to sit around and wait for things to catch fire. That's why you get the movie images of firemen playing cards until the bell rings. If nothing is on fire they often have nothing to do. Bell rings, they jump up and go put the fire out. That is literally their job. Sit around and wait for something to break.

I mean there are slow days at work and everybody has social media on their phones these days so what's the problem if they access it sometimes?

That is time theft and is stealing from the company, ya commie.

Julio Cruz
May 19, 2006
Plus if you have a high-intensity job it literally hurts your performance if you're focused in 100% of the time. There's a reason that Google and Facebook have pool tables/dart boards etc so their devs can take 10 minutes off to recharge a bit.

SimonCat
Aug 12, 2016

by Nyc_Tattoo
College Slice

Keeshhound
Jan 14, 2010

Mad Duck Swagger

This is going to be one of those things where it turns out they didn't have full insurance, and were just part of a cost-sharing plan for basic checkups, isn't it.

Julio Cruz
May 19, 2006
Also I'm betting they're covered for a lot more now but luckily they haven't needed chemotherapy or a heart bypass or a kidney transplant or a prosthetic limb or etc etc etc.

Jurgan
May 8, 2007

Just pour it directly into your gaping mouth-hole you decadent slut

$833/month for health insurance? You must be loaded. Sorry you have to pay more than poor people for once in your life.

kartikeya
Mar 17, 2009



This happened on Twitter yesterday. I was engaging someone who claimed they didn't have healthcare because the premiums and deductible were ridiculously high. This fellow jumped into the conversation:



I think it broke her a little:

VideoTapir
Oct 18, 2005

He'll tire eventually.

Dr Christmas posted:

Of course this person sees no irony with voting for Trump, who explicitly, proudly did in the Miss Teen USA dressing rooms what they've only speculated transgender people might do.

It's what they aspire to when they stop being temporarily embarrassed.

coyo7e
Aug 23, 2007

by zen death robot

VideoTapir posted:

It's what they aspire to when they stop being temporarily embarrassed.
If you're successful enough your personal sexual and emotional hangups become an idiosyncrasy.

Until then you're a monster, though

Okuteru
Nov 10, 2007

Choose this life you're on your own

VideoTapir posted:

It's what they aspire to when they stop being temporarily embarrassed.

I think it was on Reddit where I saw this quote: "Donald Trump is what the poor, the weak, and the dumb think being Rich, Strong, and Smart is like."

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Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

kartikeya posted:

This happened on Twitter yesterday. I was engaging someone who claimed they didn't have healthcare because the premiums and deductible were ridiculously high. This fellow jumped into the conversation:



I think it broke her a little:



Yeah gently caress Brad.

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