Taiwan Number 1

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Atlas Hugged: Mar 12, 2007; Put your arms around me,
fiddly digits, itchy britches
I love you all

Having a superstitious, (culturally-) Chinese wife is frustrating and awesome. For all the "we can't stand directly in front of the microwave" nonsense, I get a little bit of gold like this morning. She woke up and told me that she dreamed about her dead grandfather, something she has apparently never done before. I said it's because she'll be seeing him soon. And the blood visibly drained from her face.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 05:01

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# ? May 22, 2024 06:42

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

Atlas Hugged posted:

Having a superstitious, (culturally-) Chinese wife is frustrating and awesome. For all the "we can't stand directly in front of the microwave" nonsense, I get a little bit of gold like this morning. She woke up and told me that she dreamed about her dead grandfather, something she has apparently never done before. I said it's because she'll be seeing him soon. And the blood visibly drained from her face.

teach me how to say "grand daughter" and I will call her nonstop for you

# ? Jan 7, 2017 05:49

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

Atlas Hugged posted:

Having a superstitious, (culturally-) Chinese wife is frustrating and awesome. For all the "we can't stand directly in front of the microwave" nonsense, I get a little bit of gold like this morning. She woke up and told me that she dreamed about her dead grandfather, something she has apparently never done before. I said it's because she'll be seeing him soon. And the blood visibly drained from her face.

Wives are a laugh riot

# ? Jan 7, 2017 05:51

raton: Jul 28, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

They didn't release a China one

# ? Jan 7, 2017 07:06

Punkin Spunkin: Jan 1, 2010

japanese sex game shows will soon replace japan

# ? Jan 7, 2017 07:11

Deceitful Penguin: Feb 16, 2011

A bunch of D-list celebs looking at people loving and making reactions and noises sounds less arousing and more hilarious tbh

# ? Jan 7, 2017 07:21

Porfiriato: Jan 4, 2016

Sheep-Goats posted:

They didn't release a China one

Surely a porn mecca such as Japan has their own Japanese-language porn sites? I would think that most of the people searching an English-language porn site, using English search terms, would be weeaboos living the dream in 日本. Which would also explain why hentai was so highly ranked.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 07:21

Cuntellectual: Aug 6, 2010

Imperialist Dog posted:

I have a friend who can get me a role playing the evil white guy in a movie!

I'm probably going to end up teaching ESL after I finish my degree regardless.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 07:25

raton: Jul 28, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

Known Lecher posted:

Surely a porn mecca such as Japan has their own Japanese-language porn sites? I would think that most of the people searching an English-language porn site, using English search terms, would be weeaboos living the dream in 日本. Which would also explain why hentai was so highly ranked.

Of course they do

You would also think the a garantua of web porn would market to the Japanese audience and maybe, just maybe, those are actually words in translation and the Japanese porn consumers are so amazingly weird that they only want to see Japanese stuff.

Also magic mirror car.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 07:50

HerStuddMuffin: Aug 10, 2014; YOSPOS

That would not be weird or unique to Japan. In every porn site search rankings list by county I have ever seen, searches for porn involving people of that country ranked near or at the top.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 08:10

Outrail: Jan 4, 2009; www.sapphicrobotica.com

HerStuddMuffin posted:

That would not be weird or unique to Japan. In every porn site search rankings list by county I have ever seen, searches for porn involving people of that country ranked near or at the top.

I refuse to believe that Australians and South Africans want to hear anybody moaning with their abrasive accents.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 08:26

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

Outrail posted:

I refuse to believe that Australians and South Africans want to hear anybody moaning with their abrasive accents.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5llm2WnLIaA&t=73s

# ? Jan 7, 2017 08:44

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

# ? Jan 7, 2017 09:18

raton: Jul 28, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

HerStuddMuffin posted:

That would not be weird or unique to Japan. In every porn site search rankings list by county I have ever seen, searches for porn involving people of that country ranked near or at the top.

No other country on the list has more than half of its top searches containing anything about the country (apart from India which is as single minded as Japan). In the Japan list every single entry (except maybe mmd, I don't know what that is) is something Japanese and all but two contain the word Japan. If you don't see something unique in that I don't know what to tell you.

The US, Canada, Belgium and The Netherlands have no national search terms in the list. Most countries have only one or two.

raton fucked around with this message at 10:03 on Jan 7, 2017

# ? Jan 7, 2017 09:56

Vapor Moon: Feb 24, 2010; Neato!; The Human Font

Sheep-Goats posted:

No other country on the list has more than half of its top searches containing anything about the country (apart from India which is as single minded as Japan). In the Japan list every single entry (except maybe mmd, I don't know what that is) is something Japanese and all but two contain the word Japan. If you don't see something unique in that I don't know what to tell you.

The US, Canada, Belgium and The Netherlands have no national search terms in the list. Most countries have only one or two.

MMD = MikuMikuDance. Generally used for innocent purposes of making music videos for Vocaloid songs but horney people will be horney.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 10:25

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

what the gently caress is magic mirror car

# ? Jan 7, 2017 10:31

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

A one-way mirror, maybe?

# ? Jan 7, 2017 10:32

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

It's a car with a mirror where you can see out but not in.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 10:35

Fleta Mcgurn: Oct 5, 2003; Porpoise noise continues.

Han Nehi posted:

nihon tryna get a hand squeezy

But seriously, after reading some stories in the Japan thread about the justice system over there, I'm not sure the boyfriend punching that guy was the best idea. If the cops catch you don't they basically force you to confess?

I have no idea what happened between the punch and when he showed up back at our guesthouse. He was too drunk to coherently tell me anything and couldn't remember the next morning. I bailed him out of the drunk tank/koban holding room more than once for fighting random dudes. Worst thing that happened was that he got fired from his kindergarten job because someone finally called his boss. He didn't even lose his visa and is still working in Japan as an English teacher. I assume he's dried out a bit; haven't really spoken to him for a long time.

Cuntellectual posted:

Yeah that happened to me in Japan too, and it was particularly gross because I was 16 at the time. I'm kind of curious, how old were you when you were there?

I was in my early twenties. Not yet a "Christmas Cake".

Last time I went to Tokyo, I didn't get groped once. I must be too old and ugly now. :smith:

ladron posted:

legit sad I missed all the korea hate posting.

ㅠㅠ

A man spit on Let us English in front of a Starbucks in Ulsan once.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 10:40

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

i went and searched it on pornhub and i still have no idea

# ? Jan 7, 2017 10:41

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

I would blow Dane Cook posted:

lol do australians not know how to jerk off and require instructions

# ? Jan 7, 2017 11:20

Cumslut1895: Feb 18, 2015; by FactsAreUseless

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

lol do australians not know how to jerk off and require instructions

Just FYI I am literally in love with your name

# ? Jan 7, 2017 11:22

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

EDIT: This story is about China:

I stopped to check the map on my phone today and this filthy homeless dude comes rushing up way too close to me saying "HELLO!!!" and giving the thumbs up. I said "Nawww, brah," and backed away. He grabbed my shirt sleeve and kept giving me thumbs up. I kept backing away, and he kept tugging on my sleeve hard and harder until I broke free. Like come on, man, being that aggressive isn't going to help you out. I guess he was trying to get in close to pickpocket, but no way I won't feel those grubby fingers in my skinny jeans.

On the train, a bald guy sat next to me and, after staring at me for like 10 seconds, he took his phone out and opened the selfie cam and pretended to fix his non-existent hair (like a mirror), all the while making sure I was in the screen so he could take photos with me in it.

I stopped at one of the art museums to take a look (since they're usually free), and the amount of people touching everything was absurd. Signs all over the place saying don't loving touch this poo poo, and people aged 20 to 80 were grabbing onto sculptures and other things without any shame. A popular one was a painting with gold paint, and everyone was checking to see if the gold was real (or could be stolen). It totally ruined the vibe and I was just trying to look at some cool stuff, but someone would step in front of me and them massage the painting/sculpture like a blind person learning a face.

Rednecks.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 11:24

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

maybe you should have a rest

# ? Jan 7, 2017 11:27

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Grand Fromage posted:

maybe you should have a rest

I like when people say this to me, which is often.

"I just walked for a few hours. I'm hot and sweaty."
"Maybe you should have a rest."
"I'm still outside, and I'm not tired."
"You can rest."
"I don't want to."
"Why not?"

# ? Jan 7, 2017 11:36

Imperialist Dog: Oct 21, 2008; "I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\

I took my kids to the playground today here in Hong Kong, and I would say most of the children playing around in the blazing sun were all wearing long sleeve shirts and pants, and a few even had jackets on.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 11:40

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

It's gotta be hot as gently caress down there. I don't think it's been below 10 C here. It's not like Chengdu gets cold but usually winter at least hovers around 0. It's mostly been 15-20 C this year.

People's dress has not changed. Though today I saw a bunch of guys walking around in t-shirts all over the place so that was unusual. Just normal random people not the gym membership flyer patrols.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 11:42

peanut: Sep 9, 2007

I saw this on the BBC and thought you should see it:

Taiwan politician's funeral features 50 pole dancers - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-38528122

# ? Jan 7, 2017 13:16

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

peanut posted:

I saw this on the BBC and thought you should see it:

Taiwan politician's funeral features 50 pole dancers - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-38528122

taiwan number 1

"Now this is what I call a funeral!" said one user, while another wrote: "Looks like when it comes to funeral matters, Taiwan still comes first."

http://news.cts.com.tw/cts/general/201701/201701041838108.html#.WG9GabcwhhE

# ? Jan 7, 2017 13:18

KomodoWagon: May 10, 2013; by R. Guyovich

peanut posted:

I saw this on the BBC and thought you should see it:

Taiwan politician's funeral features 50 pole dancers - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-38528122

drat, that is peak China. PRC must be scrambling trying to top it.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 13:21

Imperialist Dog: Oct 21, 2008; "I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\

Celebrate funerals with 50 smokestacks

# ? Jan 7, 2017 13:44

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

KomodoWagon posted:

drat, that is peak China. PRC must be scrambling trying to top it.

I'm sure Rene Chang would appreciate the idea

# ? Jan 7, 2017 14:05

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Grand Fromage posted:

It's gotta be hot as gently caress down there. I don't think it's been below 10 C here. It's not like Chengdu gets cold but usually winter at least hovers around 0. It's mostly been 15-20 C this year.

People's dress has not changed. Though today I saw a bunch of guys walking around in t-shirts all over the place so that was unusual. Just normal random people not the gym membership flyer patrols.

I think it was about 26C/80F today, but felt hotter. Very sunny too, and many people were out in sunglasses, and some psychos were wearing shorts and t-shirts. The AQI was about 150, but not enough to ruin the good sunshine. Apparently this is not the usual weather at this time, but I am not complaining that I get to wear sunblock in January.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 14:31

mrbotus: Apr 7, 2009; Patron of the Pants

peanut posted:

I saw this on the BBC and thought you should see it:

Taiwan politician's funeral features 50 pole dancers - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-38528122

A similar procession rolled through my neighborhood two months ago, also blasting loud music. I'm not sure what it was for.

mrbotus fucked around with this message at 15:05 on Jan 7, 2017

# ? Jan 7, 2017 14:55

Fleta Mcgurn: Oct 5, 2003; Porpoise noise continues.

All we ever get is the water truck that plays It's a Small World.

Over.

And over.

And over.

And over.

And over.

And over.

And over.

And over.

And over.

# ? Jan 7, 2017 15:34

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

etal.

I'm guessing you didn't last long enough in korea to go through a local election

*this is a mandatory apology to frozen peas or whatever your name is these days for barging into this thread demanding attention for living 10 years in korea/disparaging korea.*

# ? Jan 7, 2017 16:28

cnut: May 3, 2016

peanut posted:

I saw this on the BBC and thought you should see it:

Taiwan politician's funeral features 50 pole dancers - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-38528122

You might say he puts the fun in funeral.

sorry

# ? Jan 7, 2017 16:32