Senior Woodchuck posted:

So, Section 31, but not in space, and without those pesky moral dilemmas.

gradenko_2000 posted:

I don't know if they changed it away from "Islamic terrorists" out of tastefulness in the wake of 9/11, or if anti-Muslim sentiment just hadn't ramped up that hard yet

neongrey posted:

Oh, it ramped up basically immediately. I suspect it was a good-taste change.

Apraxin posted:

I might be getting the timeline mixed up, but I think Hollywood then was collectively reacting to the blowback from Rules of Engagement, which was maybe the most nakedly anti-Arab/Muslim mainstream movie ever made (the one where Samuel L Jackson has his platoon gun down a crowd of Yemeni women and children while screaming WASTE THE MOTHERFUCKERS, but it's revealed they were all terrorists so he was completely justified!), so that might explain it. The release dates were close enough that the Clancy adaptation might already have been in production though, so then again maybe not.

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

The latest episode of I Don't Even Own a Television reviewed some godawful piece of poo poo Five Nights at Freddy's novel...


...written (ghostwritten?) by a girl I had a huge crush on in high school.


I don't know how I feel about this. Um, I guess it sold well, so that's good! Ironically, she was exactly the sort of person who might say she doesn't own a TV, and mean it.

zoux posted:

grittyreboot posted:

Was that your letter at the end of the Gor episode? If so, what constitutes a teen activist drama group?

neongrey posted:

That's much nicer than every other possible meaning I imagined for that combination of words.

zoux posted:

The Saddest Rhino posted:

What is an vangel

The Saddest Rhino posted:

Yes but which one???????

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Oh, it must be. I haven't listened yet. Yikes! Well, we had a weekly public access show about issues affecting teens and we did plays about domestic violence and stuff. It was pretty cool.

Leavemywife posted:

Which one turns you on more?

Tiggum posted:

I just want to know if it was your real name they censored or if they censored it because they thought "Fleta" was such a unique name that it would instantly identify you.

zoux posted:

Poor Miserable Gurgi posted:

I think this lady just did a mad libs with all her sexual fantasies and made it a book series.

The Saddest Rhino posted:

... an angel who's also a van

Domus posted:

In the one book of hers I read, the protagonist female was a psychologist. It had absolutely nothing to do with the story, but I thought it was such a weird thing to throw in there. Yes, let's pick a profession that goes along well with a time-traveling viking. Because all psychologists hear someone say they're from the 10th century, and think "well, he's good dating material!"

I want to know the poor underling who had to write that blurb with a straight face.

Antivehicular posted:

I bought this one as a gag gift for my boyfriend (it was a buck at Half-Price, whaddayawant?) and he told me it wasn't even funny-bad, just kind of icky/boring bad. That was sort of a disappointment.

Also disappointing: writing a romance about a time-traveling Viking who's committed to a psychiatric hospital (because he's claiming to be a 10th-century Viking in modern Los Angeles or wherever) and not naming it "One Flew Over The Viking's Nest."

Domus posted:

In the one book of hers I read, the protagonist female was a psychologist. It had absolutely nothing to do with the story, but I thought it was such a weird thing to throw in there. Yes, let's pick a profession that goes along well with a time-traveling viking. Because all psychologists hear someone say they're from the 10th century, and think "well, he's good dating material!"

I want to know the poor underling who had to write that blurb with a straight face.

Konstantin posted:

I have to ask, does the Viking magically speak English or does he happen to run into some attractive professor who just happens to understand spoken Old Norse?

Dienes posted:

The blurb only covers the first 50 pages or so.

It opens with the mom calls the chef to say "Your sister has joined ISIS." Sister hires the vampire-Viking-van-angel as a private investigator but then insists on coming with him to the ranch while he fetches her sister. They arrive, demon-vampire things attack, and the dude randomly teleports them to the 10th century.

The next 90% of the book is in the 10th century. The Viking is conveniently recognized as the lord of the castle they teleported to, despite being gone for years and having lost hundreds of pounds in the interim. Chef lady is shoved in the kitchen where she teaches Vikings that bread exists despite them already knowing that. There is a Twilight-esque theme where every 2-5 pages one of the pair mentions that the other smells like peppermint and coconut. Literally every couple pages. There's some love triangle with his ex-fiancee that goes nowhere, and the section in the 10th century culminates with him walking in on the chef sleeping, stripping naked, and jerking off on her while she sleeps because she's just too pretty. They teleport back to modern day to find out that the sister had already left the ranch and was never in danger, and the Viking has 6 brothers that will help take out the cult. The Viking goes on a rant on how Political Correctness is how ISIS can recruit in America, he marries the chef, and the book ends.

Oh, and there's Nazis running around doing poo poo, too.

Glazier posted:

Now paging Chris Collision, Chris Collision please pick up the white courtesy phone.

A Pinball Wizard posted:

I always wondered that too, what name did you put Ion your letter?

Tiggum posted:

I just want to know if it was your real name they censored or if they censored it because they thought "Fleta" was such a unique name that it would instantly identify you.

flosofl posted:

10th century Nazis or in the part of the book she doesn't really write about?

Dienes posted:

The blurb only covers the first 50 pages or so.

It opens with the mom calls the chef to say "Your sister has joined ISIS." Sister hires the vampire-Viking-van-angel as a private investigator but then insists on coming with him to the ranch while he fetches her sister. They arrive, demon-vampire things attack, and the dude randomly teleports them to the 10th century.

The next 90% of the book is in the 10th century. The Viking is conveniently recognized as the lord of the castle they teleported to, despite being gone for years and having lost hundreds of pounds in the interim. Chef lady is shoved in the kitchen where she teaches Vikings that bread exists despite them already knowing that. There is a Twilight-esque theme where every 2-5 pages one of the pair mentions that the other smells like peppermint and coconut. Literally every couple pages. There's some love triangle with his ex-fiancee that goes nowhere, and the section in the 10th century culminates with him walking in on the chef sleeping, stripping naked, and jerking off on her while she sleeps because she's just too pretty. They teleport back to modern day to find out that the sister had already left the ranch and was never in danger, and the Viking has 6 brothers that will help take out the cult. The Viking goes on a rant on how Political Correctness is how ISIS can recruit in America, he marries the chef, and the book ends.

Oh, and there's Nazis running around doing poo poo, too.

C.M. Kruger posted:

John Ringo is writing romance novels under a pseudonym now?

there wolf posted:

Not enough teen prostitutes.

flosofl posted:

Plus I would think the Nazis would just be tragically misunderstood allies of Viking-Vampire-Angel Gordon Ramsey.