- Ride The Gravitron
- May 2, 2008
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by FactsAreUseless
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awww dang it
But yeah, I dated one guy who got on my rear end about losing weight because he found out I was 122 lbs and "no adult woman should be over 120lbs".
I'm 5'8".
e: apparently the 120 lbs thing is some sort of anime/dating sim cutoff for being fat, idk
Murder him
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Jan 12, 2017 20:45
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 14, 2024 22:22
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- Emulator
- Sep 20, 2007
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perma-nub
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Since I've actually been in the situation where the gender roles are reversed, I'll paint the picture:
quote:Me [35M] with my GF [33/F] of 1 year, won't let me kiss her after I go down on her
Its killed the mood a couple of times in the past and I think shes being a little dramatic, as I never mind if she kisses me after giving me a BJ [not something I asked her to do, but doesn't bother me]
When we're intimate, I tend to kiss her all over and go down on her prior to intercourse as she doesn't always get off from intercourse and I like to make sure shes taken care of before we go down to sexytown. The problem comes when after that, while in the act of coitus - she won't kiss me if I went down on her. This really kills the romantic mood as kissing during the act is something I really enjoy. I suppose I could take a "time-out" in between going down on her and intercourse to gargle some mouthwash or brush my teeth but that would kind of kill the momentum/mood in itself.
Help me reddit! what do?!
TL:DR
Girlfriend thinks its gross if I kiss her after going down on her, but loves when I go down on her.
Doesn't matter, we broke up years ago. She was generally selfish and crazy, was just making a point.
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Jan 12, 2017 20:47
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- ArbitraryC
- Jan 28, 2009
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Pick a number, any number
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Pillbug
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I was kind of on that dudes side because he seemed to realize that he was the problem then he was all "I slept with over 40 women" which means he so sees them as an object rather than humans
Paying 11k for a dating coach is hilarious tho and I'm guessing if his friends are making fun of "magic tricks" it's prolly pua stuff so there's plenty of other things to make fun of here.
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Jan 12, 2017 20:50
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Flip side of this is a sizable % of women in portland are crunchy hippies. Thankfully I'm not actually dating but even finding friends is grating.
I also date women and the women of portland by and large are also really terrible to date but it's mostly because they get obsessed about tiny things that don't really matter like what store sells the best organic bagel chips but is also not responsible for gentrification
like it's the exact same annoying fixation with shopping that they hold against other women, only theirs is ~ethical consumerism~
Pick fucked around with this message at 20:54 on Jan 12, 2017
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Jan 12, 2017 20:50
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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Lol at all the manchildren getting butthurt.
You may be a manchild if...
You have children's toys on display at your residence.
You spend the majority of your free time playing video games.
You eat out more than cooking.
You expect girlfriends to supplant your mother's role in your life.
You are an adult that watches cartoons/anime on the reg.
You obsess over superheroes/video game characters.
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Jan 12, 2017 20:54
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- Ride The Gravitron
- May 2, 2008
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by FactsAreUseless
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I'd pick the man child because I could probably just sit him down to watch anime while I go out and get railed by a real man
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Jan 12, 2017 20:55
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- Captain Yossarian
- Feb 24, 2011
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All new" Rings of Fire"
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Lol at all the manchildren getting butthurt.
You may be a manchild if...
You have children's toys on display at your residence.
You spend the majority of your free time playing video games.
You eat out more than cooking.
You expect girlfriends to supplant your mother's role in your life.
You are an adult that watches cartoons/anime on the reg.
You obsess over superheroes/video game characters.
Smdh dude
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Jan 12, 2017 20:55
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Am I allowed to be in a poly relationship with both just long enough to drive all three of us off a cliff into a gorge? Because that's my answer.
that's two miracles so you'd be eligible for sainthood
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Jan 12, 2017 20:59
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- 54 40 or fuck
- Jan 4, 2012
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No Yanda's allowed
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I'd take the manchild I suppose, at least the manchild isn't putting mine or my childs health at serious risk
And now
quote:I (26M) had a weird sexual encounter with my neighbor (33M) and I am really unsure how to feel about all of this. How should I tell my girlfriend that I sort of cheated on her?
I had arguably the weirdest experience of my life last night. I am not sure how to feel at all about anything right now, it feels like it wasnt a big deal at all at the time but in retrospect...
Me and my girlfriend are really good friends with our neighbor who moved in to the apartment next to us. Last night we all got drunk and smoked weed and it was a normal hangout night, then his friend said she was gonna go to bed, and my girlfriend said she was gonna go back to our apartment. Me and the husband just hung out and got really, really drunk. Like plastered. We ended up talking about Kim kardashian, and I said i had never seen the sex tape, and he said it was really funny (Ray J was hilarious with his commentary, have to admit), and so he put it on the computer and we watched. It was ridiculously long, and we kind of both got boners at a certain point.
Now he is a foreigner (Turkey), like from another country, and apparently jerking off with your friends is semi accepted and not seen as homosexual there, so when he brought it up to me that he wanted to jerk off I was a bit taken aback obviously haha. But I was like "yeah, do you, i dont care man", and he whipped it out and it was about drat 9 inches long and I was like JESUS CHRIST and he just laughed, and asked to see mine. After a bit of like convincing, i did whip it out and he saw, and then he kind of nudged towards the video and was like "wanna do this" and just kind of started jerking off, and I did too. It was honestly really, really weird, he got shirtless and then said I should get shirtless too because it "makes it better for yourself" and we kind of just jerked off together.
Now I dont really consider myself gay, but at that moment I was kind of like ready for anything, and I cant even lie, he was a ridiculously good looking guy and buff and just handsome, at the time it kind of just felt right. It wasn't even like I was attracted to him, but in the back of my mind I couldnt stop thinking "drat he has a good body". He said "hey, wanna do it to each other?" and at first i was like ohhhh nahhhh dude thats weird, and he kept on being like cmon its not that weird, its always better with another person, i used to do it all the time with my friends back in my country. We kind of just got into a discussion about it for like 5 minutes about 'why it isnt really sexual', and he kind of convinced me at the time. He explained it as "its not really gay, its just feeling skin, gay would be taking it up the rear end or sucking dick, this is just helping each other, we used to do it all the time, everyone". He totally convinced me it 'wasnt sexual', but in retrospect, how can giving a guy a handjob not be sexual??? what the hell was i thinking
We did it, for like 10 minutes, but he was CLEARLY into it in a sexual way. While he was doing it started licking my chest and kissing my abs and rubbing me all over, there was no way he wasn't into it 100%, his mouth got about 2 inches away from my penis at one point. At one point while he was kissing me on my abs my dick just ran across his cheek, no matter how 'non sexual' you might think that is, he was TOTALLY into it. I jerked him off too a tiny bit, he was right, i felt queasy when i first did it but after a bit it just felt like touching skin, just holy poo poo his thing was massive. At the time I was like thinking "this is totally loving weird, what the gently caress, but it also feels good getting a handjob" and I was honestly so drunk. After we both finished, nearly at the same time, he casually was just like "see that wasnt that weird right?" and I was just like "huh, maybe not" and we hung out for like an hour more as if nothing happened.
Then I woke up, and I am SOOOOO loving confused I dont even know how to feel. Apparently to him that wasn't "really cheating, its just helping a friend out" but then he did all that extra stuff like lick my chest hair and he just seemed super into it. I think I honestly believed him when he said all that stuff about how "its something straight guys do back in my country", and I googled it and apparently its sort of true? but still, we aren't in his country. Giving a guy a handjob in america is cheating. I can't loving believe I actually allowed him to do that.
I am super, super conflicted. I feel like I just cheated in the weirdest, most benign way possible, but how do I explain that to my girlfriend? I was convinced it was just 'a bro thing', not us cheating on our girlfriends, but in retrospect as a sober person that sounds so stupid.
I feel like it was cheating, but how do I explain that at the time... i didnt really feel like it was cheating? Like ughhh this all sounds like such bullshit even typing it out. I am a nervous wreck right now. Like I'm not gonna KEEP it from her, we have been dating for 6 years now, we don't keep secrets, but... I want to know how to explain this to the best of my ability to make her realize where I am coming from.
Another thing I thought of... I was thinking if I found out that her and her friend from high school occasionally got together and fingered each other to a video... I honest to god probably wouldnt think that awful about it. Just thinking about it now, I honestly wouldn't even care, its just girls experimenting a tiny bit, which is considered normal by society. Hell even straight girls do it. But I suppose the same doesn't apply to guys?
tl;dr: Me and my neighbor gave each other handjobs and at the time he had convinced me it totally 'wasnt sexual' but in retrospect it was definitely cheating quite a bit. How I do explain this to my girlfriend?
This guys no-homo experience was definitely rape. Super messed up
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Jan 12, 2017 21:01
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- WampaLord
- Jan 14, 2010
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And now
This guys no-homo experience was definitely rape. Super messed up
Holy yikes, Batman.
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Jan 12, 2017 21:04
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- Mirthless
- Mar 27, 2011
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by the sex ghost
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I'd take the manchild I suppose, at least the manchild isn't putting mine or my childs health at serious risk
And now
This guys no-homo experience was definitely rape. Super messed up
That is real uncomfortable to read. Jeeze. I don't know if he should tell his girlfriend but he should probably tell a therapist because you can already see the knots it's tying his brain in
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Jan 12, 2017 21:05
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- Ride The Gravitron
- May 2, 2008
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by FactsAreUseless
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He needs to tell his girlfriend before he gets blackmailed into more totally not gay sex
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Jan 12, 2017 21:06
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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This guys no-homo experience was definitely rape. Super messed up
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Jan 12, 2017 21:06
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- Ride The Gravitron
- May 2, 2008
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by FactsAreUseless
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Not really. I'd agree if the he wasn't jerking off the other dude and admiring his huge dick. Pretty messed up regardless.
Dude was intoxicated and in no position to consent
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Jan 12, 2017 21:08
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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Dude was intoxicated and in no position to consent
Weren't they both intoxicated? Maybe they're both rapists.
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Jan 12, 2017 21:09
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- Ride The Gravitron
- May 2, 2008
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by FactsAreUseless
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With one of then clearly in control and pushing the other one into it.
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Jan 12, 2017 21:10
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- Personal Lucubrant
- Oct 18, 2016
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Just thinking about what to do with all the money I don't have.
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Nah, they were just charging up their JO crystals, right?
...right?
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Jan 12, 2017 21:11
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- 54 40 or fuck
- Jan 4, 2012
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No Yanda's allowed
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Jack me off to completion bro, it's not gay if our balls don't touch
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Jan 12, 2017 21:12
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- Mirthless
- Mar 27, 2011
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by the sex ghost
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Not really. I'd agree if the he wasn't jerking off the other dude and admiring his huge dick. Pretty messed up regardless.
imagine this same exact story except the poster is a woman
i had a gay friend in high school who was way too old to have any business hanging out with a teenager and he used to get uncomfortably sexually forward with me. I am absolutely certain he would have taken advantage of me if he'd ever been able to get me to drink around him, and I am absolutely certain I did not want that out of my friendship with him. Like this poor idiot I probably would have found a way to feel guilty about it, too.
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Jan 12, 2017 21:13
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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That's absolutely sexual assault.
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Jan 12, 2017 21:14
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- A Wizard of Goatse
- Dec 14, 2014
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Pick, that's not a manchild, that's an abusive rear end in a top hat. Okay, maybe he's both, but he's in no way the typical manchild.
For someone who does taxidermy you are bad at identifying things.
have known quite a few manchildren in different contexts from various walks of life, can conform that the sole difference between a manchild and an abusive rear end in a top hat is whether there is anyone the manchild has power over
like seriously you're talking about people defined by an obsession with their own desires and underdeveloped sense of responsibility towards others, and you don't think they're taking a swing at the wife or kids first time they're feeling grumpy?
A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 21:25 on Jan 12, 2017
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Jan 12, 2017 21:22
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- WampaLord
- Jan 14, 2010
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have known quite a few manchildren in different contexts from various walks of life, can conform that the sole difference between a manchild and an abusive rear end in a top hat is whether anything at all is angering the manchild
like seriously you're talking about people defined by an obsession with their own desires and underdeveloped sense of responsibility towards others, and you don't think they're taking a swing at the wife or kids first time they're feeling grumpy?
Obviously there can be manchildren that are abusive, but here's what happened:
Pick - "Want me to posts stuff from the view of women dating awful manchildren?"
Poster - "Yes!"
*Pick posts horribly abusive posts about people on the spectrum who have deep mental illness*
Pick pulled a bait and switch. Nothing in those stories indicated "manchild" there was no talk of figurines or anime obsession.
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Jan 12, 2017 21:25
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- DLC Inc
- Jun 1, 2011
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jfc just gas
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Jan 12, 2017 21:26
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Obviously there can be manchildren that are abusive, but here's what happened:
Pick - "Want me to posts stuff from the view of women dating awful manchildren?"
Poster - "Yes!"
*Pick posts horribly abusive posts about people on the spectrum who have deep mental illness*
Pick pulled a bait and switch. Nothing in those stories indicated "manchild" there was no talk of figurines or anime obsession.
please don't hit me i promise i won;t touch your spider man !! 
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Jan 12, 2017 21:26
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- bone app the teeth
- May 14, 2008
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*pick posts*
actually, not all men...
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Jan 12, 2017 21:31
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- WampaLord
- Jan 14, 2010
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Okay I will stop posting about Pick.
Here is a story, please accept it as my apology:
My husband's (35m) favorite phrase to say is driving me (28f) crazy
quote:My husband works the late shift at work (usually 2pm to 10pm, sometimes more for overtime.) I have known this since we started dating so I am more than understanding of the schedule and his work life and don't interfere.
After work on Fridays, or sometimes Thursdays, he and his work friends go out for drinks and late dinner, and sometimes gets home 1-3am. For these days, when they go out after work, I'd like to know around when he plans to get back. When I ask him this, my husband says "I'll be home when I get home." It. Is. Driving. Me. Insane.
We have been married one year now and I think I have been patient and understanding about that for too long. It's not that I don't trust him- in fact, I'm glad he has a way to blow off steam with his friends. But I'd just like to know at least a ballpark of when he's getting home.
He just repeats "I'll be home when I get home" when I ask him, or says "I don't know." It's just a broken record of this.
How can I get him to stop this habit? What else can I say besides "please just let me know an approximate time?"
TL;DR: Husband keeps answering "I'll be home when I get home" when I ask him when he's coming home after he goes out with work buddies. How can I get him to be more clear and direct with me?
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Jan 12, 2017 21:31
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- A Wizard of Goatse
- Dec 14, 2014
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they're pretty fucken horrific stories though and I don't think we need every story about a mere mundane childish shitbird flipping out on the wife for letting the filthy children touch ~his collectibles~ to accept the point
My (27M) girlfriend (25f) doesn't like Star Wars. Should I break up with her?
quote:The problem is also that I am not celebrating Xmas this year I am having Star Wars day instead because of the new movie coming out. She is pretty festive so I don't want her to be upset. I am still gonna do a gift exchange and hang lights/ decorations it's just gonna all be Star Wars themed.
tl;dr gf doesn't like Star Wars.
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Jan 12, 2017 21:31
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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here, this woman sucks:
quote:I [21F] recently asked one of my group members [20F] to leave and never come back, but she isn't taking well.Non-Romantic
submitted 28 minutes ago by ThrowtheRP
Hi Reddit,
I run a group and while I won't dive into too much, we're a pretty decently sized one (30 members) and we're all generally friendly with each other. Then enters Darla.
Darla is... something. While she isn't too bad when she's happy, when she's upset, she can and will become a true terror. She will sit there for hours with you crying over how everyone in the group hates her and puts herself down constantly, and regardless of whatever reassurances you give her, she will continue on. This, combined with her two-facedness (she will cry to one person but at the same time poo poo talk that same person to another person), her inability to comprehend simple things (we once tried explaining to her why the Flint water crisis was a big deal... and she refused and kept screaming "I hate science!!!!!!" every time we tried to explain it, even in non-scientific ways), her general disregard for how others feel (she had a huge crush on one particular group member, and even when he told her outright that he wasn't interested, she kept going at him until I stepped in and had to tell her to stop talking to him at all), and her constant begging for pity (this will come up later) makes her one of the most disliked members in the entire group.
So, she's had huge incidents before. There was that thing with the crush, but there was also general disrespect issues, as well as outright attacks on other group members. She's personally insulted me multiple times to my face, usually along the lines of how I'm only listening to her to make myself look good. I'm an extremely patient and lenient person... and that is my biggest flaw. I let her get away with a crap ton (with punishment for the really bad stuff). I am willing to own up to that enormous mistake... but it also kind of shows me personally that after everything I've let her get away with, she truly had worn my patience thin.
So, the latest and last incident with her that finally broke the camel's back was this: we were working on a certain project that required the whole group to be in a small competition against me. We would all use a random number generator online to "roll" dice, and I would do the same. If they rolled higher than me, they won. if I rolled higher than them, I won. It's a rather simple thing.
Well... for whatever reason, Darla felt the need to rig her roll so she would lose. And then she told me that she rigged her roll in an emotional outburst of some sort. Now, I know overall it seems to be a harmless thing. Her losing would only hurt her, no one else... but here is my reasoning for why I told her to leave:
She was crying to another group member only five minutes before about said loss. That shows me she did it to try to gain pity from other members.
When she gave me that emotional outburst that featured her admission to rigging the roll, it was during an attempt of trying to demonize another group member, who she claimed had abandoned her to complete her part of the project (they were partners). Said group member did not abandon her, merely had to go use to the bathroom.
I normally let something like this go with some small punishment, since as I said before, it hurts nobody... but because of that giant laundry list of things she's done over the past two years... I'm done. I'm done with her insults, her disrespect, and her inability to comprehend that the things she does are wrong.
So, I asked her to leave. She didn't take it well, as you can see from the title. She then proceeded to go to every single group member with a sob letter about how sorry she is for hurting them and all of that. Now, I'm fine with her apologizing, but she dragged every single member into this, and did it while I was asleep and before they woke up. So everyone woke up to this sob letter. Those who were awake at the time, she told the story to, but left out a crap ton of details. Some believed her, others didn't. Most of the people who had received her letter told me that they were angry at her for trying to drag them into this. Me personally, I didn't tell a single soul why she was let go. I wanted to keep it quiet, so that when she joins another group, she wouldn't have too much trouble. I feel it's sort of like a courtesy thing, you know?
So now here I am, fully awake and needing advice with this mess. I've already spoken to her about all of this and asked that she cease and desist trying to drag other members into the drama, she told me that I was "not her boss" anymore and that "she didn't have to listen to me anymore" and that I was a terrible person and everyone would know the truth now and yadda yadda yadda. I politely asked her to stop personally insulting me and told her that no one in the group wanted to be dragged into stuff like this, so I asked that she stop so I'm not forced to shame her to this group and possibly even to other groups (other group heads and I speak quite a bit). She of course, didn't listen and continued to personally insult me.
A last note I'd like to put is that when the pink slip was first delivered, she begged for two hours straight to stay. I'm not sure if I subscribe to the "phases of depression" thing, but she seems to be in the angry phase now, at the very least. As far as I can tell, she's out there poo poo talking me and the group to everyone who seems to be listening. Some believe her, some don't. She's already pretty notorious in our community for being a pity whore. That being said... I don't want her to drag the name of my group through the mud. All of the members are good, hard-working people. They don't deserve to have their names shat on by her.
Any advice, Reddit?
tl;dr: I told a problematic girl to leave my group after an infraction that shattered my trust in her and 2 years worth of problematic incidents, including personal attacks. She is now out badmouthing me and my group to anyone who has an ear. What should I do to stop this, or at least prevent reputations from being soiled?
the trick is darla sucks so anyone who listens to her should know better
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Jan 12, 2017 21:35
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- A Wizard of Goatse
- Dec 14, 2014
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this one's from one of those idiots who thinks their boring life merits a Dostoyevsky novel but:
Roommate [25F] is threatening to file a restraining order on me [24F] if I don't sign lease break or roommate release form by tomorrow because of onion smell in apartment
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Jan 12, 2017 21:35
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 14, 2024 22:22
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- 54 40 or fuck
- Jan 4, 2012
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No Yanda's allowed
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here, this woman sucks:
the trick is darla sucks so anyone who listens to her should know better
Any bets on the group? I say furries
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Jan 12, 2017 21:37
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Jan 12, 2017 20:45
stories
lady
