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It's amazing how much poo poo people will put up with just to not be single.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:13
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Hey Buddy this one is really easy. You clearly resent this woman and, luckily, havenet married her yet. It sounds like youre gainfully employed and i know youre getting older but trust me she aint the one. People dont really change unless something dramatic happens and unfortunately the only dramatic thing in her life is you dumping her. Hell, if this thread is anything to go by you could probably pretend to be different Jim Carrey characters to multiple women half your age at the same time and none of them would be the wiser or have any thought of leaving you.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:14
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Dienes posted:Weren't we all just saying a few pages back how the guy upset that his girlfriend had sexual partners before him should get over it? How is this any different? There's a difference between accepting that your partner has had sexual experiences before you, and seeing your partner have those sexual experiences Esp. if those sexual experiences are clearly better than the ones they're having with you, like in the case of that lady whose husband found her sex tape. How is he ever supposed to move past that? The thing with past-partners insecurity is that it's completely unreal, the insecurities are based off of imagined scenarios and notions of inadequacy. Show them an old sex tape and it's not imaginary anymore. In the case of that lady's husband, he had a pretty drat good reason to be insecure after that. Just get rid of the sex tapes. There's no reason to keep them.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:23
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Who watches other people's sex tapes?! Remember back when we all made fun of the creepy incel who stole his roommate's sex tape? In my opinion you're just as loving weird to watch a sex tape your partner made before they were with you because, uh, a) they didn't give you permission and b) the other person didn't give you permission. I have no idea why people make sex tapes in the first place but I think if those people could have somehow found a way to not watch a thing they wouldn't be plagued with insecurity and intimate knowledge of how bad they are at sex. Like if you seek out something that will hurt you and then sit through ten to twenty minutes of it before blaming someone else for your hurt feelings you're the idiot, sorry.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:24
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Expecting your partner to purge every single speck of their past romantic relationships is getting pretty close to "I expect my partner to be a virgin" territory.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:24
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Mirthless posted:Just Fixed. Why create something that can lead to so much poo poo? Just remember having sex, weirdos.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:25
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Let's just agree that humanity is a race of doomed fools and our romantic endeavors, like all our pursuits and goals, will end in tears
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Jan 16, 2017 17:27
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Tiny Deer posted:Who watches other people's sex tapes?! Who keeps records of old sexual experiences around for their partners to find when they're in a committed relationship that's lasted for years? And lol, how do you compare a relationship with a long term partner to your creepy roommate that rifles your poo poo? And why should your partner need the permission of the person you used to gently caress to watch a video file on a computer in their house that they share with you? The whole idea is bizarre. You're putting your personal priorities AND the personal priorities of somebody no longer involved in your relationship over the priorities and feelings of your partner, who lives with you. Regardless if they "shouldn't have been snooping", it's still inconsiderate. If you're that invested in your privacy you should probably just not get married. Or cohabitate. There's going to be a lot more severe breaches than them opening video files in your My Documents folder. Everybody snoops, you've done it and probably not even been conscious of it. It's all degrees, of course, but your expectations on privacy should reasonably shift when you get into a relationship with somebody, esp. if you are living with them. The further you are integrated together into a relationship the more gray the area of your stuff/my stuff becomes and the less you can really blame them for finding something they shouldn't. Couple that's been married for years? Not really their fault they found the sex tape. minivanmegafun posted:Expecting your partner to purge every single speck of their past romantic relationships is getting pretty close to "I expect my partner to be a virgin" territory. "This is a tape of my ex-boyfriend/husband/girlfriend/wife loving me better than you ever have" is not "a single speck" of their past romantic relationships Mirthless fucked around with this message at 17:33 on Jan 16, 2017 |
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Jan 16, 2017 17:30
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minivanmegafun posted:Expecting your partner to purge every single speck of their past romantic relationships is getting pretty close to "I expect my partner to be a virgin" territory.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:32
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Mirthless posted:And why should your partner need the permission of the person you used to gently caress to watch a video file on a computer in their house that they share with you? This line is pretty telling towards your ideas about privacy. Should partners know each other passwords as well? "Hey honey just gonna go through your private videos on your own computer and start watching poo poo!"
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Jan 16, 2017 17:33
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WampaLord posted:This line is pretty telling towards your ideas about privacy. Should partners know each other passwords as well? I didn't say it wasn't a violation of their partner's privacy I just said that including your ex in the chain of people who get to be offended is not really what you should be doing, considering that they are not your partner and you are presumably not in the home you share with them anymore edit: Like, I don't loving get this - a lot of you guys value your own personal autonomy and privacy SO MUCH and I get that when you're dating but if you're married to somebody a little of both of those things needs to go out the window if you want it to work because there's two people involved and if one or the other person feels like they're not being respected they're going to just loving leave. "I shouldn't HAVE to do [X]" might be true and you might be right to say it in a traditional friendship or a workplace but sometimes being married to somebody means having to do things you might object to and I'm not talking about sex stuff before anybody even loving goes there. If you have to purge your life of sentimental bullshit from a previous ex because you know it bothers your partner, maybe you should just do it instead of being an rear end in a top hat about it? What impact does it have on you, vs what impact does it have on them? Mirthless fucked around with this message at 17:41 on Jan 16, 2017 |
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Jan 16, 2017 17:34
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You don't own someone else's body and nudity because they used to date the person you're with. Whether or not you feel entitled to it or it doesn't matter is your own problem, I guess, but it's still a violation of a third party's privacy. I understand watching thirty seconds or so and going 'oh god I better talk about this with my partner' but watching the thing to completion is weird and self-harming just so you can feel like the wronged one.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:36
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Keeping a sex tape about someone you separated with is really loving weird to me. Like what are you going to do with it, masturbate to your ex?
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Jan 16, 2017 17:39
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Mirthless posted:I didn't say it wasn't a violation of their partner's privacy I'm sorry, but by this logic the sex tape thief did nothing wrong as long as no one finds out what he did. Do you get why that's not the case?
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Jan 16, 2017 17:39
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Tiny Deer posted:I'm sorry, but by this logic the sex tape thief did nothing wrong as long as no one finds out what he did. Do you get why that's not the case? ...In what loving way? The issue is between two people. The two people in the partnership; The one who saw the video, and the one who kept it. Bringing the ex into this just turns it around on your partner for being upset. It's as much of an argument about emotional infidelity as it is about privacy violation. Let me give you a tip here, some relationship advice: If you have this fight with your partner, and you bring up the way they violated your ex's privacy in this gently caress tape you kept, don't be surprised when they walk out and never loving talk to you again, lol
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Jan 16, 2017 17:43
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Please. Let's not have sex tape derail. From /r/LegalAdvise quote:I want to preface this first with by no means am I a super responsible person on top of everything financially. However today I received notice I'm being sued by the department of justice for outstanding student loans handed over to them by the department of education. Now I'm currently still a student interning at a hospital for no pay and I haven't made a single payment outside of $20 once just trying to show I know it's there I work part time at a movie theater while during my little free time I study for my registry exams for my certification. I don't know how I'm going to pay for these loans I have especially since just recently I've had a flood in my home losing most my things not having renters insurance and my car breaking down causing all kinds of chaos in my life financially I have nothing. What should I do about this? And coming soon.... quote:So I live in Colorado and work in weld county, I was told by my manager I can't be in a relationship with one of my employees since I was just promoted to a manager position. Does anybody have some legal advise as to whether they're allowed to do this or not? Bonzo fucked around with this message at 17:48 on Jan 16, 2017 |
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Jan 16, 2017 17:45
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Tiny Deer posted:You don't own someone else's body and nudity because they used to date the person you're with. Whether or not you feel entitled to it or it doesn't matter is your own problem, I guess, but it's still a violation of a third party's privacy. You don't own someone else's emotions and feelings just because you're dating them. They're allowed to feel insecure over something, and you can indeed wrong them by invoking those feelings of insecurity, even if they wronged you first. You don't have to watch more than 30 seconds of a gently caress tape your partner kept with their old partner to know the trust of your relationship has been violated by you both. Your partner is keeping a sexual memento of a past partner, and it's hard to interpret that as anything other than a desire to maintain that sexual attachment.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:48
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You should not make them at all to begin with, because what if you have children, and your children have children who also have children but it stops there because they are childfree, but then they all stumble upon your bignonocoffeebreaksexytimes.wmv still in the recycle bin of your Pentium II and you feel embarrassment from the great beyond? 
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Jan 16, 2017 17:50
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Mirthless posted:You're putting your personal priorities AND the personal priorities of somebody no longer involved in your relationship over the priorities and feelings of your partner, who lives with you. I think this thread has lots of examples of cases where it is indeed the best course of action to put one's priorities over the priorities and feelings of one's partner. Even if they live with you.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:51
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The sex tape that tore this thread apart I have no idea why anyone would make a sex tape or take naked pictures of themselves so I got no opinion here I do feel like casually taking and sending nudes became a standard part of flirting at some point while I wasn't paying attention.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:53
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Tater Love 
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Ride The Gravitron posted:Need help still: I [17M] am homeschooled and my parents won't let me have friends. I'm lonely and isolated and just looking for some help.Personal issues I really hope he does well in his classes and makes lots of friends. I wasn't homeschooled, but I did go to a very small private school my entire life, and while making friends was never an issue, the freedom and lack of rigidity that came with college classes led to a pretty abysmal performance my first year.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:53
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Bonzo posted:And coming soon.... Gonna get fiiiiired.
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Jan 16, 2017 17:54
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Subjunctive posted:I think this thread has lots of examples of cases where it is indeed the best course of action to put one's priorities over the priorities and feelings of one's partner. Even if they live with you. Yes, you're right, but in this specific example your partner is mad because they found a video of you loving somebody you used to be deeply emotionally involved with, and the best thing you have to say to them is "did you think of X's feelings when you clicked that video?" It's the dumbest possible way to respond to this situation. That's the answer you give if you are absolutely committed to ending your relationship or divorcing over this violation of your privacy (which, to them, is probably not much worse than them realizing you're still hung up on your sex life with your ex - that kind of answer is basically a confirmation of that, or at least, that's how it's going to come across)
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Jan 16, 2017 17:56
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My girlfriend is really gassy Basically, she farts a lot... Almost always, like clockwork when she comes home from work, she'll get in the door and let one rip. She farts a lot when she sleeps also Is it time to leave her?
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Jan 16, 2017 17:56
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zakharov posted:The sex tape that tore this thread apart everyone has a professional quality digital camera in their pocket "you've got a great body" turned into "let me show you my dick" really quick
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Jan 16, 2017 18:00
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no dick pics please only buttholes
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Jan 16, 2017 18:03
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Lots of people posting reasons to be mad at their partner for having an old sex tape that could have been cut and pasted from people bitching about their partners watching porn in general.
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Jan 16, 2017 18:04
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Zzulu posted:My girlfriend is really gassy
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Jan 16, 2017 18:22
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Zzulu posted:My girlfriend is really gassy Nah that's just license to fart more yourself.
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Jan 16, 2017 18:25
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Condition yourself to love the smell of farts by giving yourself a little treat every time someone farts around you.
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Jan 16, 2017 18:33
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Dienes posted:Lots of people posting reasons to be mad at their partner for having an old sex tape that could have been cut and pasted from people bitching about their partners watching porn in general. let's just split the difference and ask mirthless and tiny deer to stop posting forever
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Jan 16, 2017 18:35
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Zelder posted:let's just split the difference and ask mirthless and tiny deer to stop posting forever wtf tiny deer is great. for shame, zelder. you are normally so good, too 
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Jan 16, 2017 18:36
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I don't like anyone who goes back and forth for pages and pages about inane stuff Myself included, let's talk about cum
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Jan 16, 2017 18:40
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quote:My [22 F] boyfriend [26 M] is terrified of spiders and is demanding that I move my pet tarantula to the basement. I am refusing because the basement is too cold for the animal to survive. We are at a standstill and I need advice on what to do.Relationships Sever, tell boyfriend he is a wiener, continue to use amazing reddit handle "throwtarantula"
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Jan 16, 2017 18:49
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yeah asking someone to kill their pets is probably a deal breaker
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Jan 16, 2017 18:51
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Zelder posted:I don't like anyone who goes back and forth for pages and pages about inane stuff I've been doing kegel exercises when I jerk off so I can improve the volume and intensity of my loads.
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Jan 16, 2017 18:52
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i absolutely, unironically, love the names she picked for her tarantulas. save christopher!
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Jan 16, 2017 18:53
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Hmm, my girlfriend has pet tarantulas that I'm deathly afraid of, better move together
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Jan 16, 2017 18:53
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She should keep it somewhere warm and protected
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Jan 16, 2017 18:55
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Pick posted:Sever, tell boyfriend he is a wiener, continue to use amazing reddit handle "throwtarantula" Tarantulas are great, please be nice to them
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Jan 16, 2017 18:56
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