La Brea Carpet posted:

La Brea Carpet posted:

ThePeavstenator posted:

rip that job

also divorce that man, that diss track sounds weak as poo poo

Mirthless posted:

I don't know if it's grounds for divorce, I'm gonna guess he doesn't work in an office environment and probably didn't realize how loving serious this was.

I can guarantee you that he's going to be apologizing for this one for the rest of his loving life though.

Mirthless posted:

I don't know if it's grounds for divorce, I'm gonna guess he doesn't work in an office environment and probably didn't realize how loving serious this was.

I can guarantee you that he's going to be apologizing for this one for the rest of his loving life though.

SpiderHyphenMan posted:

"I got my wife fired" is absolutely grounds for divorce.

quote:

My [21 M] cousin [21 M] unwittingly insulted our new professor [late 20s F] and caused bad blood. How do I survive this semester without making things more awkward?Non-Romantic
submitted 10 hours ago * by throwawaywhyyy2

I'll keep this as short as possible.

My cousin Mike and I are in the same computer science program at our university. We didn't grow up together and I actually met him while at university. It was only after being friends with Mike for a few months that we discovered that we are cousins, since he was adopted and had no clue who his father was. We also frequent one of the local gaming shops and love to play tabletop RPGs. A few weeks ago, a new woman came into the gaming shop and wanted to get involved with the local gaming community. I invited her to play with us since we were about to start a new DnD campaign and I try to reach out to new members as much as possible.

To make a long story short, Mike was a jerk to this woman and caused her to quit midgame and vow never to return to the game shop. While making small talk, the woman told us she worked with computers and loved to code. Mike proceeded to test her knowledge in the most nit-picky fashion possible, trying to get her to slip up and reveal a lack of knowledge. I told Mike numerous times to quit it, but he ignored me. Eventually, the woman snapped and told him to cut it out herself, Mike asked her if she had PMS. Naturally, the woman left and called us a bunch of unwelcoming misogynists. I don't blame her for thinking that after the way Mike acted, as no one else in the group besides me stood up for her.

The new semester started this week and much to my surprise and embarrassment, this woman is the new professor they hired to teach one of the advanced coding classes. Mike and I are both enrolled in this class and were sitting next to each other when the professor walked in the room. She gave us both a dirty look when she saw us, but ignored us for the rest of the class.

I don't want this professor to associate me with Mike and think that we are made of the same mold. I also do not want to cut Mike out of my life because I am the only blood relation he has contact with. We do not have class again until next week. Any advice is welcome.

EDIT: I forgot to mention, I confronted Mike afterward and as misguided as he was, he acted that way because he thought our professor was cute. He had no idea that his behavior would be perceived as antagonistic, since he normally does not talk to women.

La Brea Carpet posted:

Pick posted:

punchability level... extreme...

Pick posted:

punchability level... extreme...

quote:

My [21 M] cousin [21 M] unwittingly insulted our new professor [late 20s F] and caused bad blood. How do I survive this semester without making things more awkward?

Mirthless posted:

OK
6'1" 205:


6'1" 240:


"BMI doesn't mean anything, I'm not obese" is how I ended up getting to 300lbs before I bought a scale. "I wear my weight well" is a nice thing to say for your physical appearance but it doesn't mean poo poo for your heart and joints.

Pick posted:

I'm guessing he doesn't have a job, because if he has ever had a job how does he not know this is entirely unacceptable?


By the way, "snark" is definitely one of those words about the... sufferability of a person

quote:

Mike proceeded to test her knowledge in the most nit-picky fashion possible, trying to get her to slip up and reveal a lack of knowledge. I told Mike numerous times to quit it, but he ignored me. Eventually, the woman snapped and told him to cut it out herself, Mike asked her if she had PMS. Naturally, the woman left and called us a bunch of unwelcoming misogynists. I don't blame her for thinking that after the way Mike acted, as no one else in the group besides me stood up for her.

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

It's very possible her garbage rear end husband works in the academic world, is some kind of musician or artist, or otherwise works outside an office environment and doesn't have to interact with people like his wife does.

He's still a terrible goddamn excuse for a human being and I'd murder him if I were her.

Pick posted:

I like this part because it's like, oh no, after this she'll assume we're misogynists!

Yeah sometimes people do assume you're a misogynist if you do incredibly misogynistic things

Antivehicular posted:

I like the part where the cousin apparently never talks to women and somehow claims to not realize that antagonizing and insulting women somehow comes off as antagonizing and insulting because women aren't human beings, obviously, so how could you generalize your behavior around men to women?

Pick posted:

punchability level... extreme...

La Brea Carpet posted:

Murderability level imho

ThePeavstenator posted:

he should bring her his cousin's severed head on a platter, that would probably get him some forgiveness

quote:

This is probably what I will do. Since it's a small class with less than 10 students, I'm going to see if I can transfer to a different section. My schedule will suck, but it's better than the alternative.

legendof posted:

Oh my god I would actually murder that guy. They both deserve whatever she does to their grades, and I sincerely hope she fails them both.

La Brea Carpet posted:

quote:

Does this text from [16M] seem flirty?

submitted 22 minutes ago * by weeaboythrowaway

So I [15F] texted my crush asking for anime reccomendations, and he responds with a rather lengthy list, and adds at the end that it should keep the occupied for a few months, "Then come back cuz I'm not done "
I mean, he sent a winky face, but it wasn't necessarily in a flirty context... So I am not quite sure how to interpret this haha

TL;DR does "Then come back cuz I'm not done " in the context of anime reccomendations seem flirty?

Themata posted:

And who the gently caress claims being a dipshit is how they express attraction towards a woman?

La Brea Carpet posted:

LOL

Themata posted:

And who the gently caress claims being a dipshit is how they express attraction towards a woman?

La Brea Carpet posted:

LOL

Mirthless posted:

I'm pretty sure he was trying to neg her, lol

He's probably the kind of guy who posts to mensrights and theredpill and thinks he's an alpha.

Mirthless posted:

Seriously! Can you imagine? Go to school, deal with years of insults, implications you can't code because you're a fe-male and your uterus impairs your coding ability (a real thing that people really believe), constant second-guessing of all of her work, peers not taking her seriously, etc etc along the way, you get your master's degree and a job as a professor at a pretty decent school, go into a local game store and have some snot-nosed 21 year-old brat mansplain and "um, actually!" you about something you now have an advanced degree and six figures of debt over. I'm surprised she didn't loving punch him, lol.

legendof posted:

Oh I can imagine extremely well, as this has happened to me. I wish I'd walked out but I was there with my boyfriend - he was in a different game and didn't notice. I'm not a professor, though, so the most retaliation I ever managed is when one of the people I'd met at that game cafe asked me for a referral at my prestigious employer, and I wrote in my referral letter that he was a blatant misogynist outside of a work environment. He was not extended an offer.

(why he thought I'd say anything else is beyond me)

legendof posted:

Oh I can imagine extremely well, as this has happened to me. I wish I'd walked out but I was there with my boyfriend - he was in a different game and didn't notice. I'm not a professor, though, so the most retaliation I ever managed is when one of the people I'd met at that game cafe asked me for a referral at my prestigious employer, and I wrote in my referral letter that he was a blatant misogynist outside of a work environment. He was not extended an offer.

(why he thought I'd say anything else is beyond me)

Themata posted:

how sluts are like roosters

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

well? don't keep us in the dark.

Mirthless posted:

If he's been doing poo poo like this for years, absolutely.

I think people who work in offices think behaving professionally is obvious, but most workplaces outside of office buildings and retail aren't really professional and the kind of things you can easily get away with in those places - and get a lot of laughs out of, all around - will land you in a conference room with a male manager, a female manager and a security guard with a box.

Even hospitals are a completely different standard. You should hear the poo poo nurses say out loud at work, jesus loving christ

I'm not trying to defend him, necessarily, I'm just saying I don't think he realized how much he was loving up everything.

quote:

Me [27F] and my fiancé [28M]; we were being robbed at knifepoint, and he ran away and left meRelationships
2,314 points 612 comments submitted 3 months ago by abandonedfiancee to /r/relationships

This happened about eight months ago, and I’ve tried to be reasonable and put it past me but I’m really struggling. I’ve been told what he did was reasonable, makes sense, etc, but I keep coming back to that moment of total abandonment and fear when I realised he’d run. I just feel completely alone around him now.

We were walking home from a work function at a bar at around 1am. Neither of us had drunk that evening so we weren’t even slightly tipsy. Two guys across the street from us crossed over and approached us asking if we knew where such-and-such a street was. As fiancé turned around to point out where the street was, one of the guys pulled out a knife and told us to stop moving and to give him all our poo poo (phone, wallet, etc). I was surprised by how calm I was in the moment, and told them I needed to reach into my coat pocket to get my phone. As I was doing that, the guy pressed the knife against my ribs as warning because I guess he was worried I had a gun (even though that’s pretty unlikely in my country). When this happened, my fiancé bolted. It took me a bit to even realise he’d left me, and when I realised that he’d run I was certain I was about to get badly hurt or die.

Fortunately, the thieves seemed to get kind of spooked by him getting away and just hurried me up. They took my phone, bag (with my purse with all my money, cards, personal effects), necklace (worth like ten bucks) and legged it. The whole ordeal from start to finish took maybe five minutes.

I was kind of in shock and wandered off back up the street, heading back towards the bar, not even really thinking. A few minutes later my fiancé found me and told me he called the police, who arrived about ten minutes later.
I found out that fiancé had run about a block away, calling emergency services as he ran. We were both okay physically, except for a tiny bit of broken skin on my ribs where they’d pressed the knife.

My fiancé says what he does makes sense – that if he’d hung around and it turns out they’d wanted to hurt us or worse, we’d both be hosed because no one else would be around to call the cops or an ambulance. That he wanted to be alive and able to help in case something happened to me. He also says that by running away, the thieves didn’t want to hang around any longer than necessary (which is true), which might have saved me. His mum agrees and has praised him for not being an idiot, but my own mother has quietly told me she thinks he’s a coward for abandoning his wife-to-be (but she also has very oldschool beliefs about gender roles). Fiancé asked me not to tell our friends exactly what happened, because he says they wouldn’t understand his actions unless they were there.

My own thoughts are that, by running away, he potentially significantly decreased my chance of survival. I’m only about 157cm (5’2”) and 51kgs (110lbs). He’s 178cm (5’10”) and 75kg (165lbs). The two guys were about his size. They would have been able to easily overpower/subdue me, but my fiancé there would have made it 2v2 (although we would have still been at a disadvantage, them still having a knife and size advantage) and not left me completely at the mercy of two criminals who mug couples at night. I also wonder, what would have happened if him leaving me had given them the courage to do something worse? I mean, I don't think they would have - they seemed pretty strung out, interested in valuables and cash only - but what if?

I look at him and wonder, do I even want kids with him? If I did have a child with him, would he abandon him or her in a dangerous situation because it was the ‘smart’ thing to do?

I’ve lost a lot of attraction to him. He accuses me of wanting to use him as a meatshield just because he’s a man, and that what he did was smart and not the machismo stupidity I ‘wanted’ that could have gotten us both killed. I didn’t want him to try to fight them… I just wanted him by my side. Which I guess is selfish, because it was a dangerous situation. I don’t feel safe around him anymore, which I used to. I’m even scared of the dark again, despite him lying in bed right next to me.

As I'm typing this, I kind of feel like Lex in Jurassic Park, after being ditched by the lawyer - "He left us! He left us!". Stupid thing to add, but I keep thinking of that scene!

I don’t know what to think. He doesn’t want to see a counsellor because, again, he says they wouldn’t understand the situation unless they’d experienced it themselves. We fortunately don’t have a wedding date set, so there’s no immediate pressure of marriage. Please help!

tl;dr: My fiancé ran away and left me to face two muggers by myself. He says it was the smart, logical thing to do, but I can’t get over how abandoned I felt in the moment and I’ve lost a lot of regard for him.

quote:

My (22F) boyfriend (23M) put a roach in my pants Relationships
1,522 points 441 comments submitted 1 year ago by therwordno to /r/relationships

I have a HUGE phobia of roaches. It's a real phobia, I can't see an up close photo of one, I feel like throwing up being near one, I will cry if one touches me. I just hate them. If I see one in a room, I won't be able to sleep.

I am seeking therapy on this, I know it's an unhealthy mental illness and I need to get over it.

My boyfriend is a very "tough" guy. He's not the football player tough guy, but he describes himself as a "logical nerd". He will tell me I'm being overemotional when I cry, call me a wimp, etc.

I broke up with him a year ago because he purposely took my car keys with him to work so I couldn't go to a friend's funeral. (His reasoning was that the friend was my ex, and he didn't want to comfort "his woman sobbing about some other man". )

He agreed to get therapy and he seemed to have changed. My roommate bailed on me, and he was willing to pay rent so he moved in and started dating again. Lately he's been getting annoyed because my cat has been killing roaches and I can't touch them to throw it away.

This morning, I was (tmi) naked and wanted to put on pajama pants. My boyfriend offered to get them and handed them to me. I put them on and felt something crunchy partial in my crack of the butt so I pulled it out thinking it was a wrapper or something and it was a FULL GROWN ROACH. Dead, and squished. A wing fell off when I threw it away from me.

I started throwing up and sobbing uncontrollably. I've never felt so dirty and violated. I kept replaying the moment over and over. I couldn't breath and I was in a ball screaming. I was so afraid there might still be roach on me. The neighbors pounding on the door to see if I was okay. My boyfriend started yelling at me to stop being an "overdramatic bitch" and to "toughen the gently caress up". He said I was being a drama queen and he wasn't picking up the roach for me. He called me a baby and started making fun of me telling me I was a grown rear end woman and a stupid roach wasn't going to hurt me. He said I wasn't putting enough effort into my therapy and he was trying to help me.
After showering three times and throwing up some more, I called my best friend to pick me up. I'm staying at his house on the sofa and my boyfriend is blowing up my phone.....

I want to break up with him and kick him out, but am I over reacting? He must have told his family because his mom and sister are texting me telling me that I'm using the phobia as an excuse to be dramatic, that he was just trying to help me, etc.

I know a 22 year old being scared of a roach is silly. But it was really mean of him to do this to me! am I crazy for being pissed that he tricked me into putting a roach in my rear end crack?!