quote:

My [31f] sister and her partner [27F&29F] adopted [3M] about a week ago he went home with them. Yesterday he was suppose to meet the family/ He hid behind his moms legs all day and did not speak to anyone. My parents are calling him a dud.

My sister and her partner adopted Mike. Mike has been home with them for about a week. Mike was suppose to meet the family yesterday and he just hid behind my sister and her partner. I offered him ice cream. He came out, snatched it away, went back behind them and then said thanks. He sat in between them on the sofa and did not say much to anyone. He followed them everywhere.

My parents are calling him a dub and I need to know how to make them shut up before they say something stupid.

TL;DR: Recently adopted nephew was shy around the family. Parents are calling him a dud

quote:

I [20M] cheated on my girlfriend [20F]. I'm jealous that she's being crawling into her roommates [20M] bed

I cheated on my girlfriend and she broke up with me. I was told yesterday she's still having her recurring nightmares. I was told she's been crawling into her roommates bed. Her roommate is muscular and I was told she stays in his bed until he gets up. I was told they've been having sex. I don't know what to do

TL;DR: Don't know what to do.

Gaunab posted:

Gaunab posted:

This is so dumb it's funny.

Gaunab posted:

CharlestheHammer posted:

Hey those autistic parents adopted a kid.

CharlestheHammer posted:

Hey those autistic parents adopted a kid.

Mirthless posted:

it's a lot more common for women to do it, there are women out there who will go months or even years without farting around their partner a single time. It's the most unfair societal expectation/double standard. Not the least reason of which is that it makes ladies appreciate farts a lot lot less.

BOOTY-ADE posted:

Pretty much this, I'm free with my farts and would hope my SO would be too. I've dated plenty of women who could rip louder, more pungent room-clearing farts than I could ever hope to muster, and it almost always resulted in gagging and laughter. I'm no James Joyce but people need to quit being so uptight about turd trumpeting

Mirthless posted:

pretty early on in our relationship my wife accidentally farted the pokemon center theme and that's when I knew it was true love

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

The music or the sound when your pokemon get healed?

quote:

My parents (44M & 44F) have rented out the unit below me (22F) for my siblings (17M & 18F)

I'm typing on my phone, so sorry for any mistakes!

My fiance, we will call him Malcolm (25M) and I got engaged around a year ago. Around the same time, we moved in together. We moved into a rented apartment complex that has six apartments in total. We have just signed up for another year on our lease as we are getting married this June and didn't want to put more stress on ourselves by moving.

My parents, we will call them Emily and Richard, have a home that is about 15mins from my apartment. They recently bought a business that is an hour away from the city we currently live in. Because of this, my parents have put the house on the market and are moving up to be closer to their business. My siblings, Max and Lauren are enrolled in university in the city. My parents had said they would rent an apartment for my siblings once the house sold so they could attend uni with out the large commute.

This week, the apartment below my fiance and I became available for rent. My mother had made a few jokes about my siblings moving in, but I didn't think anything of it. About an hour ago she texted to tell me that she had applied for the unit and they had been approved for a years lease.

I am feeling incredibly conflicted about this. I just moved out and gained my independence. While I love my siblings to death, I feel super awkward having them so close.

It also doesn't help that my fiance and my sister don't get along too well. And the fact that in our first 6 or so months of being married, we will be living in the same complex as them.

I don't know what to say to my mother or how to react in the situation. They can't take the lease back now. But if anyone has any suggestions on how to handle this /make it easier, that would be great!

TLDR: my parents are moving away and have rented the unit below me for my siblings, despite my fiance and sister not getting along well and not asking me first.

WampaLord posted:

I'm still reacting to the realization that not being able to control your farts means I should see a doctor.

Can everyone else control sneezing too? Is it just me?

Gaunab posted:

More parent stuff


Her siblings will have to get used to hearing her getting railed.

WampaLord posted:

I'm still reacting to the realization that not being able to control your farts means I should see a doctor.

Can everyone else control sneezing too? Is it just me?

Mirthless posted:

the healing sound I think

it was a brief, "toot, toot, toot-toot-tooooot" followed by ten minutes of us screaming in laughter

quote:

So my ex (27f) and I (28f) split after 2 years in July last year. Her call, but we ended things on pretty good terms and have remained pretty cordial since.

When we got together she already had a small dog, and in the 2 years we got a cat together. Because she already has a dog with health issues, and because of her work, I took the cat, but still let her babysit from time to time because she loves it

I have since met a new girl (26f) (started dating in November) and things are going great. The only sticking point was the relationship I had with my ex and she hated the fact we shared the pet. So I went to my ex and told her we can no longer be friends or have any kind of connection.

Ex was reasonable about it - she was sad but said she understood. I said it was up to her what happened with the cat but that we couldn't share. This devastated her knowing logistically it was impossible for her to keep the cat.

She has begged me to come up with a way that she doesn't entirely have to be cut from the cat's life, suggesting making her time with him less frequent and doing the swap through a third party so we didn't have any contact. This seems pretty reasonable, but the new girl is not keen on any kind of connection whatsoever and finds the pet sharing weird.

So the decision I have to make is: - Tell the ex that we can have no connection, in turn devastating her, even though the solutions for the cat seem pretty reasonable or; - Cut all contact but let her see the cat once in a while, likely costing me the new relationship.

Is the new girl being unreasonable? Does the old girl just have to deal with her grief? Is it so weird sharing a pet with an ex? It seems like a decision where no one wins.

tl;dr: My new girlfriend wants me to cut all ties between me and my cat and my ex, even though it would crush the ex to lose contact with the cat. Do I crush the ex who is being reasonable or risk my new relationship for my ex's feelings?

quote:

A while ago I matched with this guy on tinder. Now I don't take tinder too seriously and only use it for hookups, but nonetheless, I added this guy on Instagram and snapchat. He even found me on facebook which was kinda creepy.
Now, once I added him on instagram, I realized I didnt find him attractive at all. He has a napoleon complex and is very into guns, his (lovely) tattoos and is very cocky. No big deal as we weren't talking anymore.

Fast forward to this weekend. I saw he messaged me on snapchat. I opened it and he said we should hang out(actually he kinda demanded it). I told him I cant because I have school in the morning. He then got angry and said I've been blowing him off for months(?????), that every girl does this to him and hes sick of it(ummm maybe its YOU and not the girls) and that I owe him a date. I told him that I had school and I had to go. I thought it would sink in that school is more important. He then went off and said he would pick me up right away, we could cuddle, he would give me a massage and then drive me to school in the morning. Then when I didnt respond he said we could just talk and watch the stars all night. I once again said no and was irked because I never promised him anything or even talked to him. He then said more things about how he wants to just spend the night with me.

Now I'm really creeped out and pissed off. I dont owe him anything but I feel like hes the type of guy who will get crazy if I continue to say no. I'm not sure what to do because he knows my full name(he found me on fB) and im uneasy about that.

WampaLord posted:

I'm still reacting to the realization that not being able to control your farts means I should see a doctor.

Can everyone else control sneezing too? Is it just me?

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Guy[22M] I met on Tinder is bombarding me[F21] with messages saying I owe him

WampaLord posted:

Can everyone else control sneezing too?

WampaLord posted:

I'm still reacting to the realization that not being able to control your farts means I should see a doctor.

Can everyone else control sneezing too? Is it just me?

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Guy[22M] I met on Tinder is bombarding me[F21] with messages saying I owe him

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

lol

I [28m] have cut my ex [27f] out of my life totally for my new partner [26f]. But the ex is begging me not to keep her from the cat we had together even though it'll probably cost me my new relationship.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Guy[22M] I met on Tinder is bombarding me[F21] with messages saying I owe him

Pick posted:

how can she owe him when he hasn't even bought her a $15 plate of microwaved alfredo at olive garden yet

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Guy[22M] I met on Tinder is bombarding me[F21] with messages saying I owe him

Pick posted:

how can she owe him when he hasn't even bought her a $15 plate of microwaved alfredo at olive garden yet

Mirthless posted:

Kind of? I can stop myself from sneezing but I consider it mostly involuntary. I've gotta be having a pretty bad day to not be able to hold in a fart.

cock hero flux posted:

Usually, yeah, but stopping one feels really unpleasant so most people don't bother

WampaLord posted:

Turns out I'm defective and everyone else is just rude.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Guy[22M] I met on Tinder is bombarding me[F21] with messages saying I owe him

timefly posted:

and "let me know if you can come give a massage or something to make it up to me".

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Guy[22M] I met on Tinder is bombarding me[F21] with messages saying I owe him

Gaunab posted:

This is so dumb it's funny.

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

Which two countries/cultures is she talking about? I like how she presents it like no one from her country farts ever at all and wherever she's moved to is like fartsville, fartsylvania and its fuckin hysterical

WampaLord posted:

I'm still reacting to the realization that not being able to control your farts means I should see a doctor.

Can everyone else control sneezing too? Is it just me?

Batterypowered7 posted:

Can you really not hold in your farts? I've been laughing for the past five minutes at the thought of some poor goon completely at the mercy of their own farts. Like, you're at a meeting with your boss or an important client and a look of terror comes over your face as you realize you're about to fart and there's nothing you can do about it.

Batterypowered7 posted:

Can you really not hold in your farts? I've been laughing for the past five minutes at the thought of some poor goon completely at the mercy of their own farts. Like, you're at a meeting with your boss or an important client and a look of terror comes over your face as you realize you're about to fart and there's nothing you can do about it.