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I just realized this new thread existed and was coming to ask if Age of Emperor was a real thing, but I guess this page answers that question. 
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Feb 3, 2017 15:32
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You know, I was thinking that maybe the age of the emperor stuff was cool in good in that it'll shut up those fanboys who loved talking about what would happen if/when the emperor was woke, but now I'm thinking it would probably be worse since they'd say it shouldn't have happened this way because of some tiny bit of background trivia from a book or WD issue from 20 years ago. I also wonder if these same people who made constant holy hand grenade jokes right before I left are still making them.
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Feb 3, 2017 15:35
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They are. 
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Feb 3, 2017 15:58
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 GW stop encouraging them with your AOS rules
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Feb 3, 2017 15:59
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mcjomar posted:
GOOD KNIGHT, ALL
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Feb 3, 2017 16:34
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Am I the only one that thinks its weird that the Primarchs are apparently like 25 feet tall? I always got that they were supposed to be ubermensch, but in the realm of actual people not like literal giants. It makes their backstory really weird, too. You have stories of primarchs like Lion El'Jonson and Janhatai Khan who were integrated into pseudo-medieval socieities and were adopted sons of rulers and stuff, and it makes sense if you imagine them like Conan-style supermen besting standing head above everyone and besting anyone in combat, but those stories are super weird if they're actually supposed to be enormous dudes. Like the background is all 'The king found the feral youth and recognized the fire of greatness in his eye', when it should really be 'the king rode into the clearing and said 'holy poo poo that baby is as big as a cow, get that fucker in a cart I want him on my side boys'.
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Feb 3, 2017 16:50
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DO IT TO IT posted:That roboute model looks like a fuckin fischer price toy compared to the 30k one Thanks. That's a very precise way of putting it.
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Feb 3, 2017 16:53
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Ashcans posted:Am I the only one that thinks its weird that the Primarchs are apparently like 25 feet tall? I always got that they were supposed to be ubermensch, but in the realm of actual people not like literal giants. It makes their backstory really weird, too. You have stories of primarchs like Lion El'Jonson and Janhatai Khan who were integrated into pseudo-medieval socieities and were adopted sons of rulers and stuff, and it makes sense if you imagine them like Conan-style supermen besting standing head above everyone and besting anyone in combat, but those stories are super weird if they're actually supposed to be enormous dudes. Like the background is all 'The king found the feral youth and recognized the fire of greatness in his eye', when it should really be 'the king rode into the clearing and said 'holy poo poo that baby is as big as a cow, get that fucker in a cart I want him on my side boys'. tbf, how do you "see the greatness in the eyes' of an infant? All babies can do is poo poo and cry for like the first 3 months of their existence
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Feb 3, 2017 16:54
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TheChirurgeon posted:tbf, how do you "see the greatness in the eyes' of an infant? All babies can do is poo poo and cry for like the first 3 months of their existence GW would have you believe that Lion El'Johnson spent the early years of his existence beating giant monsters to death. even when he was a baby. I guess he left behind bio bombs in his nappy or something.
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Feb 3, 2017 16:57
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TheChirurgeon posted:tbf, how do you "see the greatness in the eyes' of an infant? All babies can do is poo poo and cry for like the first 3 months of their existence Ashcans posted:Am I the only one that thinks its weird that the Primarchs are apparently like 25 feet tall? I always got that they were supposed to be ubermensch, but in the realm of actual people not like literal giants. It makes their backstory really weird, too. You have stories of primarchs like Lion El'Jonson and Janhatai Khan who were integrated into pseudo-medieval socieities and were adopted sons of rulers and stuff, and it makes sense if you imagine them like Conan-style supermen besting standing head above everyone and besting anyone in combat, but those stories are super weird if they're actually supposed to be enormous dudes. Like the background is all 'The king found the feral youth and recognized the fire of greatness in his eye', when it should really be 'the king rode into the clearing and said 'holy poo poo that baby is as big as a cow, get that fucker in a cart I want him on my side boys'.
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Feb 3, 2017 17:02
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mcjomar posted:GW would have you believe that Lion El'Johnson spent the early years of his existence beating giant monsters to death. even when he was a baby. I guess he left behind bio bombs in his nappy or something. yet another reason to be disappointed in my own 4-month-old son
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Feb 3, 2017 17:02
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Ashcans posted:Am I the only one that thinks its weird that the Primarchs are apparently like 25 feet tall? I always got that they were supposed to be ubermensch, but in the realm of actual people not like literal giants. It makes their backstory really weird, too. You have stories of primarchs like Lion El'Jonson and Janhatai Khan who were integrated into pseudo-medieval socieities and were adopted sons of rulers and stuff, and it makes sense if you imagine them like Conan-style supermen besting standing head above everyone and besting anyone in combat, but those stories are super weird if they're actually supposed to be enormous dudes. Like the background is all 'The king found the feral youth and recognized the fire of greatness in his eye', when it should really be 'the king rode into the clearing and said 'holy poo poo that baby is as big as a cow, get that fucker in a cart I want him on my side boys'.
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Feb 3, 2017 17:05
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Wait when did ultramarines turn purple?
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Feb 3, 2017 17:12
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It looks like poo poo. Like, bad.
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Feb 3, 2017 17:16
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lilljonas posted:Wait when did ultramarines turn purple? "We're not corrupted by Slaanesh, you're corrupted by Slaanesh. We've always been purple. SHUT UP!"
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Feb 3, 2017 17:16
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Ashcans posted:Am I the only one that thinks its weird that the Primarchs are apparently like 25 feet tall? I always got that they were supposed to be ubermensch, but in the realm of actual people not like literal giants. It makes their backstory really weird, too. You have stories of primarchs like Lion El'Jonson and Janhatai Khan who were integrated into pseudo-medieval socieities and were adopted sons of rulers and stuff, and it makes sense if you imagine them like Conan-style supermen besting standing head above everyone and besting anyone in combat, but those stories are super weird if they're actually supposed to be enormous dudes. Like the background is all 'The king found the feral youth and recognized the fire of greatness in his eye', when it should really be 'the king rode into the clearing and said 'holy poo poo that baby is as big as a cow, get that fucker in a cart I want him on my side boys'. also does this mean the Empror is the size of a Dreadknight?
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Feb 3, 2017 17:23
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Moola posted:also does this mean the Empror is the size of a Dreadknight? The Emperor was actually 5'5" and it all the problems of the Imperium are because he could never put horus over his knee and give him a paddling.
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Feb 3, 2017 17:30
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The Chapter Approved stories were always that the Emperor was a big rear end dude but still in the realm of human proportions. Like in the Salamanders one Vulkan and the Emps take part in a regular human feat of strength contest to see if the Emperor can convince Vulkan to come with him (eventually he sucker punches Vulkan with a power fist lol)
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Feb 3, 2017 17:33
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GW is a parody of itself; goons marvel.
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Feb 3, 2017 17:47
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Emperor Titans are actually 1:1 scale clones of the Emperor, like an Evangelion but with a crotch laser and a cathedral on their back.
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Feb 3, 2017 17:51
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90s Cringe Rock posted:Emperor Titans are actually 1:1 scale clones of the Emperor, like an Evangelion but with a crotch laser and a cathedral on their back. The souls of the machines are the mothers of the people who use them, checks out.
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Feb 3, 2017 17:53
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MikeCrotch posted:The Chapter Approved stories were always that the Emperor was a big rear end dude but still in the realm of human proportions. Like in the Salamanders one Vulkan and the Emps take part in a regular human feat of strength contest to see if the Emperor can convince Vulkan to come with him (eventually he sucker punches Vulkan with a power fist lol) Part of the weirdo history of the Emperor is him being born in ancient Turkey and spending thousands of years hiding among mankind before revealing himself at the end of the Age of Strife. This is actually a much better story if you assume he was 30 feet tall, and he spent thousands of years trying to blend in. He spends fifteen years disguised as an elephant with a hand-puppet owner before spinster falls in love with his puppet and he has to arrange a comic escape from the village.
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Feb 3, 2017 18:19
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Ashcans posted:Part of the weirdo history of the Emperor is him being born in ancient Turkey and spending thousands of years hiding among mankind before revealing himself at the end of the Age of Strife. I thought the lore was that a bunch of Native American shamans gave up their souls to combine them into one super-being that was the Emperor
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Feb 3, 2017 18:56
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TheChirurgeon posted:I thought the lore was that a bunch of Native American shamans gave up their souls to combine them into one super-being that was the Emperor The lore is that tons of ancient shamans (I don't know if it was specifically Native American, maybe) all decided to combine their power and essence through a suicide-pact ritual to fight the danger of the Warp, and when they all died they combined into a super-being to who could exist in the warp and protect mankind from its power and influence. That super-soul was then born into a mortal body in ancient Turkey, and initially grew up as a relatively normal kid until he discovered his abilities. Then he went into hiding/disguise for thousands of years while he developed his powers and tried to steer the course of humanity until he felt ready/necessary to take up direct leadership. Literally everything about the Emperor is insane. When I was a kid I just thought he was some regular dude who had managed to come out on top of unification and end up in charge, and then had all sorts of crazy mythology built up and assembled around him as a result of exploiting things like messiah prophecies to take control of worlds and star systems and the complexity of sending and receiving information over the entire Imperium, so the Golden Throne was basically like any normal relic/corpse display, and all the stuff he 'did' was just the result of machines, rituals, etc. I don't know if that was a better idea at all, but it made finding all the other stuff about him really batty.
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Feb 3, 2017 19:27
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Hooray, more over-designed garbage miniatures. Guillman looks kinda lovely tbf
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Feb 3, 2017 19:43
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The sad part is that they already have a Robot Guillotine model and he's pretty ok:
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Feb 3, 2017 19:56
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MikeCrotch posted:The Chapter Approved stories were always that the Emperor was a big rear end dude but still in the realm of human proportions. Like in the Salamanders one Vulkan and the Emps take part in a regular human feat of strength contest to see if the Emperor can convince Vulkan to come with him (eventually he sucker punches Vulkan with a power fist lol) That's Russ that he punches in the face. He does a trial of strength with Vulcan and sacrifices his winning trophy drake in order to save Vulkans life, and then Vulkan is like "this guy is a cool guy".
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Feb 3, 2017 20:14
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TheChirurgeon posted:I thought the lore was that a bunch of Native American shamans gave up their souls to combine them into one super-being that was the Emperor Coincidentally just watched the Emperor Text to Speech episodes where they do a cliffnotes version of 40K history with popsicle puppets and it seemed good which is astonishing. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FyeoBm5QFnA Its Rinaldo fucked around with this message at 20:18 on Feb 3, 2017 |
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Feb 3, 2017 20:15
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Avenging Dentist posted:The sad part is that they already have a Robot Guillotine model and he's pretty ok: There's nothing sad about it; you could just use this model if you like it better
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Feb 3, 2017 20:49
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It's sad because they paid someone for something worse when they already had something pretty good. Like I'd play Warhammer 40k anyway.
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Feb 3, 2017 20:55
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fair enough
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Feb 3, 2017 20:57
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Ashcans posted:Turkey
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Feb 3, 2017 21:23
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^^^ IIRC, the Emperor is supposed to be around from the dawn of civilization, because the threat of the warp emerged when people stopped basically living as nomadic hunter/gatherers and started getting time to think up inventive ways to gently caress stuff/murder people/scheme, so his arrival is basically at the dawn of 'history'. Making the Primarchs big monster dudes is also kind of lame because I thought narratively that was the point of the ones that turned to Chaos and became Daemon Princes. Daemon Magnus is a huge fuckoff dude, but it's because he explicitly abandoned his humanity to pursue his own aggrandizement and it's reflected literally in his enormous, monstrous form. Whereas the Primarchs that didn't turn and remained loyal to humanity retained their essentially human stature. I also thought that was the point of the loyal primarchs being dead/lost, because choosing humanity also meant accepting mortal limits and, ultimately, to die as a man. The primarchs who turn may gain immortality, but it came at the price of their own identity, so they remain in the story but only as puppets and tools of the Chaos powers, not as free individuals. It was also what made Abaddon remotely interesting, because he was someone with the power and stature to have taken that deal, but he refused it because he wanted to retain his independence to pursue his own goals. But I guess now the primarchs are all back and huge rad dudes and that's supposed to be awesome because we can mash them against the chaos ones in the middle of the board. Ashcans fucked around with this message at 21:35 on Feb 3, 2017 |
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Feb 3, 2017 21:27
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Avenging Dentist posted:The sad part is that they already have a Robot Guillotine model and he's pretty ok: Yeah this is both cool and good. C'mon GW
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Feb 3, 2017 21:28
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Ashcans posted:^^^ IIRC, the Emperor is supposed to be around from the dawn of civilization, because the threat of the warp emerged when people stopped basically living as nomadic hunter/gatherers and started getting time to think up inventive ways to gently caress stuff/murder people/scheme, so his arrival is basically at the dawn of 'history'. GW not understanding that being the biggest doesn't mean the best of most effective certainly reflects in their design philosophy
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Feb 3, 2017 21:36
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FrostyPox posted:Yeah this is both cool and good. C'mon GW Look at them POWER ABS.
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Feb 3, 2017 21:40
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I think they would look better as normal sized guys fighting big gently caress off demons and poo poo, makes them look that much cooler oh god why am I even thinking about 40k fluff
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Feb 3, 2017 21:43
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Flipswitch posted:I think they would look better as normal sized guys fighting big gently caress off demons and poo poo, makes them look that much cooler Yeah, or just like, maybe a head taller. Even the FW primarchs are massive compared to "normal" marines
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Feb 3, 2017 21:49
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Bad Moon posted:GW not understanding that being the biggest doesn't mean the best of most effective certainly reflects in their design philosophy Yea, it's become obvious that the stuff I actually liked about GW was either completely unintentional to begin with, or no longer understood by the people who are still doing it. 
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Feb 3, 2017 22:19
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Ashcans posted:Yea, it's become obvious that the stuff I actually liked about GW was either completely unintentional to begin with, or no longer understood by the people who are still doing it. I feel like FFG did a decent job but of course they got fired, so 
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Feb 4, 2017 00:30
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