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ripptide
Jul 28, 2016

So sorry, but you seem to have a small fuzzy growth on your arm....

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SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

I'm still catching up, but have a Chris

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard
GoFundMe

alf_pogs
Feb 15, 2012



start a gofundme so i can invest in a videogame, we'll all get ships, come on guys you won't want to miss out

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

Raskolnikov posted:

YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME, PUNK?

YES! THE BOUNCY AMMO COUNTER SAYS SO!

Fargin Icehole
Feb 19, 2011

Pet me.
This stupid loving game good yet? I'm gonna check back on the next thousand or so posts after this.

alf_pogs
Feb 15, 2012


Fargin Icehole posted:

This stupid loving game good yet? I'm gonna check back on the next thousand or so posts after this.

only the bdsse

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

So, MOMA, your $8000 of ships... Is that the retail price or the price with the employee discount?

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

The Titanic posted:

When the only thing your company can do is art, guess what takes center stage?

That's right. Product renders, animation stuff, pictures of rooms, and anything they can adequately Archer.

Showing gameplay or progress on anything game related would show people how bad everything is really going.

Hell, one of these days somebody is going to figure out that the 5 years of work they put into their small, separate <12 player arena shooter modules aren't even the groundwork for an MMO.

Massively Minor Online? (Don't exactly feel comfortable using the term game at this point.)

CrazyTolradi
Oct 2, 2011

It feels so good to be so bad.....at posting.

alf_pogs posted:

cymelion's posting has been pretty agro recently
He's a ragey bogan, probably been on the XXXX again lately.

ManofManyAliases
Mar 21, 2016
ToastOfManySmarts


Can't post for 3 hours!

SelenicMartian posted:

So, MOMA, your $8000 of ships... Is that the retail price or the price with the employee discount?

I did receive a discount on some.

Virtual Captain
Feb 20, 2017

Archive Priest of the Stimperial Order

Star Citizen Good, in all things forevermore. Amen.
:pray:

TheAgent posted:

lol if any of this is loving true

quote:

If you are asking then yes. We do use internal accounts to prop up funding numbers. These are not backer only funds. We are encouraged to buy ship packages on a bi-weekly basis. Any monies that come to the coffers via internal employee accounts are counted into that number. This includes managers who end up pledging with caveats. These can be sold personally to third parties without supervision. Large packages are sold at discounted amounts to [employees, contracted employees, certain backers and streamers] for heavy discounts. The full amount is represented in the Funding Tracker.

I don't know if it's true, but if citizens were allowed to believe it, whatever is left of the greymarket could be destroyed. Get out while you can MoMA :ohdear:

or toxx some ships by summer August at least.




We know it's probably true because of Roberts's Razor - the explanation that includes the most mismanagement and money grubbing is probably the correct one.

edit:

SelenicMartian posted:

So, MOMA, your $8000 of ships... Is that the retail price or the price with the employee discount?
:eyepop:

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.



Virtual Captain
Feb 20, 2017

Archive Priest of the Stimperial Order

Star Citizen Good, in all things forevermore. Amen.
:pray:
quote != edit

Beer4TheBeerGod
Aug 23, 2004
Exciting Lemon

I'm pretty sure none of the packs include a significant discount over buying them individually. Plus packs, like the Valentine's Day ones, can't be split up.

It's a scam within a scam.

Inscamption

Virtual Captain
Feb 20, 2017

Archive Priest of the Stimperial Order

Star Citizen Good, in all things forevermore. Amen.
:pray:

:unsmigghh:





In the last 500 years, the Fourth Stimpire has dominated four systems, which it has united into one starzone, Stimsis. The Fourth Stimpire has origins from the Ten Empire War in which 10 of the United Stimpires revolted against each rules. All empires except for the fourth swore freedom upon their citizens. There is no free speech in the Fourth Stimpire, and all self-controlled transportation has been made illegal without undergoing painful medical verification methods, in which arteries are severed without pain resistant, operated entirely by machines. The way they work claim to be the most hygenic and healthy way possible, but these machines often rub against pain points, causing great deals of pain to patients. The heart is then extracted from the body and placed into a glass grinding machine. Various energy centers are also dissected and replaced with dangerous transplants. After the painful, 52 hour surgical procedure, patients will then have to use a fused guidance tool, which pumps painful resistors into the body every 2 hours. The pain they have caused is so bad, the victim would freeze in a tense position. They would then collapse afterwards.

Sexual stimulation in any way within the grounds of the Fourth Stimpire is strictly prohibited, and anyone detected even touching their sexual organs will be subjected to a penectomy or if the offender was a female, they would then have a razor inserted into their ovaries. They would pump a blue solution into the womb until the stitchings burst. Offenders would also be forced to show their operated areas in public, and they would always harass and punch them to a pulp, against their will.

Otherwise, offenders would be tazed with the worst type of electricity in the systematic district, causing so much pain, the victim would scream and flail in madness. The pain would also triple every second, but no death would be incurred. This is also used in combat against enemy units, which is why all UEE forces must wear the upgraded suit to block this effect.

However, enertainment is also questionable in UEE grounds. Sporting events end with the losing team being rounded into a grinder and shredded on live television, boxing matches end with the loser having their hands removed without anasthesia, flight races would end with the losers having their arms and legs removed, then being injected with insanity, for entertainment. People are also forced into these events, by undergoing a painful 127 hour procedure which involves tweaking the muscles so they will not listen to brain commands, and then having a painful drug injected which also causes madness if the player is not sporting. This is all for entertainment, and anyone not watching any of it during sporting times and cheering for the winning team, they will be imprisoned into galactic camps.

Snuff films are also broadcast, and actors are actually murdered just for entertainment. Stealth droids also guide these forced actors into behaving exactly as the director dreams, otherwise they will be punished by being placed into a macerator and having their execution written into the film. Any film that does not feature someone being murdered will be burned and the entire crew behind it will be executed in the most grotesque way possible - vivisection.

All executions are broadcast, and anyone who misses even a millisecond, even by blinking, will be executed. All citizens must boo to the person being executed, and the family is gathered to be injected with eternators, which cause pain forever, making them immoral but feeling the pain tenfold every millisecond. They cannot pass out, but they will feel like it forever.

Conquests by this Stimpire end in the planet being razed, and all the citizens being executed in the same way as their citizens are. The planet is then destroyed and all remnants of it are removed, and any memories of it will be erased instantly from civil minds. People who are also killed are also erased from memories, and all memories of them, including toys and pictures, are destroyed.

Prisoners undergo 40,000 years of relentless and endless labor, and anyone not complying is sentenced to the eternator injection. All prisoners injected with eternators are placed into capsules and launched into far space, then the room is closed tight to ensure maximum insanity. Some prisoners are also subjected to the removal of blood, the lungs, the liver, the genitals, the skeleton, the muscles, the eyes, and even the injection of pressure. Prisoners sentenced to pressure chambers are locked in until they are inflated to a high level. The decompression is then stopped to make sure they are inflated and uncomfortable.

Children born on the 14th of July are subjected to the removal of their skeleton and an implant of a silver liquid to replace it. The nervous sysem is also injected in various parts to ensure it is five times more sensitive than the average.

Restaurants also are ordered to serve civil meat, and anyone attending must give themself up to be cooked into a grotesque meal. They are cooked alive, undergoing extreme pain, and are then subjected to industrial grinders and blenders. The Stimpire orders at least 1 million citizens to be dispatched every day, as they are afraid the population may overthrow them. But only one planet is cared for, and the rest are banned from eating, drinking, talking, using technology, touching anyone, wearing unauthorized clothes, touching buildings, or walking a centimeter out of designated routes. Civil enforcers are on every planet, and they are engineered so that they are 40 times larger than the 300 quadrillion population. At least 7 billion die every 12 hours under this rule.

Thoughts are also surveyed, and anyone who does not think anything to loving the Stimpire with more than their capabilities will be sentenced to a prison. Prisoners who are punished for this violation will meet their greatest fear, only to have it amplified so they will turn insane as they imagine it exactly as they fear it. They then undergo a painful extraction of all fluids, to be replaced by a toxin which causes permanent irritation. The unknown substance keeps the subject aging normally, except they will never die. Prisoners punished in this way are unable to be reverted, despite many efforts, and they will never be able to be disposed.

The sickening truths have been revealed only today, and invigilation teams are still investigating the truths without setting foot in the galactic space of this sickening empire.

Beer4TheBeerGod
Aug 23, 2004
Exciting Lemon

Once again we see evidence of how backers can't tell the difference between what is promoted and what is provided.

CrazyTolradi
Oct 2, 2011

It feels so good to be so bad.....at posting.

ManofManyAliases posted:

I did receive a discount on some.
Toxx on something worthwhile, like CIG failing to meet a deadline, you gutless loving wonder.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

Sillybones posted:

New thread title?

I disagree. That would put us in the class of Redditors, that have nothing more clever than threats, obscenities, and schoolyard insults to offer in defense of their san gréal.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

http://i.imgur.com/QRlO06d.mp4

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy
I don't know if this has been posted before but you guys led me to think there was no content in this game

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRgcazu3c3U

You should be ashamed of all that FUD.

Virtual Captain
Feb 20, 2017

Archive Priest of the Stimperial Order

Star Citizen Good, in all things forevermore. Amen.
:pray:
The shame triples every second, I assure you.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

TrustmeImLegit posted:

Never forget that we were 100% denied hot guaranteed legal action

This is the Star Citizen thread. Why shouldn't we be as blueballed as the Citizenry?

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

OK, who registered the thread meme account?

Tailoring is in

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

The Titanic posted:

I want to write some lore too. It'd be awesome. Just getting the lore pipeline in place.

I am refactoring my lore. Some skinny 14 year old boy with breast implants came by and told me it was not any good as per the Chairman and it needed a rewrite. Last time I ever do 150 pages on UEC plumbing debacles.

Annnnnnd, poo poo, someone ate ALL the donuts. AGAIN!

Samizdata fucked around with this message at 08:11 on Feb 24, 2017

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

There's much turbulence in space

http://i.imgur.com/Y5IlZnB.mp4

And here's something is off and I just can't put my finger on it.

http://i.imgur.com/v5ykpqI.mp4

And a gif of the guy whose outfit is used to calibrate cameras, probably

Tokamak
Dec 22, 2004

SelenicMartian posted:

Tailoring is in

The first iteration of Far Cry hunting and crafting is looking good!

Ghostlight
Sep 25, 2009

maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me



Throw MOMA from the thread.

grimcreaper
Jan 7, 2012

Ghostlight posted:

Throw MOMA from the thread.

This sounds like a terrible idea. Quite honestly, moma is the most honest person in here next to dsmart. Id like to see thr 2 of them do a live stream ama together.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

To conclude this round of AtV gifs:

Just smile and scroll, boys!

http://i.imgur.com/FYlSwyW.mp4

starkebn
May 18, 2004

"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"

SelenicMartian posted:

To conclude this round of AtV gifs:

Just smile and scroll, boys!

http://i.imgur.com/FYlSwyW.mp4

Where the hell is that? There's a window!

eeldvark
Apr 22, 2014
Reason for 88 being used in the artwork: it's symmetrical. They can mirror it any way they like and it will still look right. It's actually kind of lazy-smart.

e: gently caress, top of new page. Do I have to post a cat/dog picture now?

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

eeldvark posted:

Reason for 88 being used in the artwork: it's symmetrical. They can mirror it any way they like and it will still look right. It's actually kind of lazy-smart.

e: gently caress, top of new page. Do I have to post a cat/dog picture now?
Post an aardvark.

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy

eeldvark posted:

Reason for 88 being used in the artwork: it's symmetrical. They can mirror it any way they like and it will still look right. It's actually kind of lazy-smart.

e: gently caress, top of new page. Do I have to post a cat/dog picture now?

No, the rules say that if you hve to ask you have to post an aardvark. (I swear I didn't read the post before this one, how the hell did we both think about the same animal?)

In any case :lol: if you think they would consider the symmetry or such in the art. They are lazy, not smart.

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard












SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

The really final gift from the latest AtV.

http://i.imgur.com/MaBzp1k.mp4

AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them
Grimey Drawer

ManofManyAliases posted:

I did receive a discount on some.

A 4% coupon is hardly worth talking about.

Also dunno why you are so mad, Derek suing CIG would mean CIG would be able to blame him for spending backer funds on legal crap. Kinda like when CIG said they were going to sue the Escapist and then never mentioned it again.

Are you mad because Star Citizen is complete poo poo, be honest, is that what it is? There might still be time to see all your crap at 70% moma.

Michaellaneous
Oct 30, 2013

WTFO being WTFO
https://clips.twitch.tv/wtfosaurus/TalentedToadCougarHunt

Tippis
Mar 21, 2008

It's yet another day in the wasteland.

starkebn posted:

Where the hell is that? There's a window!

ION Storm, presumably…

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Daztek
Jun 2, 2006



What's the difference between the two Star Citizen and Hellion?



:allears:

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