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Residency Evil posted:BWM Thread: Tell me how to figure out how much to spend on an engagement ring. You know, if you pour your own blood on a piece of moissanite, you can bypass the majority of the DeBeers supply chain / middlemen for comparable quality!  Spend however much you feel is reasonable for what you're getting, within your budget. Who the gently caress cares as long as you can afford it? Just pretend I put some sort of humblebrag about ring costs here and we can move on.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:11
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| # ? Jun 5, 2024 15:47 |
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Residency Evil posted:BWM Thread: Tell me how to figure out how much to spend on an engagement ring. Are you looking to earn the approval of you showy friends, or to acquire BFC humble-brag fodder?
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Mar 13, 2017 22:11
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Are there engagement hooves for weddings between horses? I am not going to google this because I know what the answer will be.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:12
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Sundae posted:You know, if you pour your own blood on a piece of moissanite, you can bypass the majority of the DeBeers supply chain / middlemen for comparable quality! I know it's bordering on frugal weirdo who eats nothing but lentils, but my wife and I were very happy with the moissanite in palladium that we got for like $350. Looks nice, and still looks good years later unlike CZ.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:13
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Sundae posted:You know, if you pour your own blood on a piece of moissanite, you can bypass the majority of the DeBeers supply chain / middlemen for comparable quality! Moissanite is old, what you want is equinite.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:16
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monster on a stick posted:Are there engagement hooves for weddings between horses? Just mount (heh) a diamond to this: 
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Mar 13, 2017 22:16
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You must buy your wife at least as much jewelry as you buy your horse.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:18
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Sundae posted:Who the gently caress cares as long as you can afford it? This needs to be in the title of the thread and on the top of every page.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:19
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Depends how expensive her friends' rings are. 100% serious
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Mar 13, 2017 22:22
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monster on a stick posted:Moissanite is old, what you want is equinite. Holy poo poo. This is amazing. quote:I know it's bordering on frugal weirdo who eats nothing but lentils, but my wife and I were very happy with the moissanite in palladium that we got for like $350. Looks nice, and still looks good years later unlike CZ. Moissanite is gorgeous. I actually think it's a pretty awesome thing.  I only posted that because I remember there being a 10+ page long derail about it in the wedding and engagement thread a few years back. It was very goonsay.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:23
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RheaConfused posted:Have you asked the person you are proposing to what kind of ring they prefer? Yup. There's a pinterest. Nail Rat posted:A lot less than you probably think. Sundae posted:You know, if you pour your own blood on a piece of moissanite, you can bypass the majority of the DeBeers supply chain / middlemen for comparable quality! FrozenVent posted:Are you looking to earn the approval of you showy friends, or to acquire BFC humble-brag fodder? Honestly there's no reason to show off as either she or I could buy a ring. One of her friends has a $50k ring, which seems absurd and pointless. She set up a pinterest with rings that range from anywhere from 5-20k, but she's said she doesn't care too much and would rather have something unique rather than the usual round cut/tiffany-style setting. The goon part of me is just having a tough time coming to terms with buying something that will have us ending up in the same place (getting married) no matter what I spend on it.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:24
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GoGoGadgetChris posted:Depends how expensive her friends' rings are. We're getting engaged a bit later than some of her other (Midwestern) friends did, but I know most of her friend's rings are around a carat or so. The $50k ring is a bit of an outlier. She thinks spending a ton of money is silly.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:27
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Residency Evil posted:she doesn't care too much and would rather have something unique rather than the usual round cut/tiffany-style setting. Shave your body. Make your hair into a diamond.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:28
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Residency Evil posted:Honestly there's no reason to show off as either she or I could buy a ring. One of her friends has a $50k ring, which seems absurd and pointless. She set up a pinterest with rings that range from anywhere from 5-20k, but she's said she doesn't care too much and would rather have something unique rather than the usual round cut/tiffany-style setting. The goon part of me is just having a tough time coming to terms with buying something that will have us ending up in the same place (getting married) no matter what I spend on it. Calculate an average of the price of the rings on her pinterest; if it's less than a standard deviation from the median price, that's what you spend. If the median is outside that range, three months salary.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:29
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Residency Evil posted:One of her friends has a $50k ring You're hosed.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:29
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Enos Cabell posted:You're hosed. No she just wants something unique costing between 5k and 20k.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:30
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5 is the starting point? Hoo boy
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Mar 13, 2017 22:30
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Starting at 5k or at just 5 ?
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Mar 13, 2017 22:36
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TONS of Not BFC People drink the two month's salary Kool Aid, so that's a median national ring value of $8,667
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Mar 13, 2017 22:38
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Is that two months pre or post tax?
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Mar 13, 2017 22:39
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monster on a stick posted:Is that two months pre or post tax? Two months wages of what you think you'll be making two years from now. 
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Mar 13, 2017 22:42
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monster on a stick posted:Is that two months pre or post tax? Either way it's terrible, but whoever came up with that "rule of thumb" is an evil marketing genius.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:43
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GoGoGadgetChris posted:TONS of Not BFC People drink the two month's salary Kool Aid, so that's a median national ring value of $8,667 That's household income. 2 months of median US income is around $4,833 unless your wife is paying for half of the ring.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:43
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monster on a stick posted:Is that two months pre or post tax? You want to explain to your wife that you're a big fuckin' cheapskate and deducted your health insurance premium from the ring budget?!
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Mar 13, 2017 22:43
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Lol I'm so loving glad I got a car instead
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Mar 13, 2017 22:44
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GoGoGadgetChris posted:You want to explain to your wife that you're a big fuckin' cheapskate and deducted your health insurance premium from the ring budget?! My idea was to buy it early in the year when I'm maxing out my 401(k) at 65%. EDIT: also finding a cheap horse that can provide both the Equinite for the ring and plenty of "pulled pork" for the wedding feast. vvvv - I can hook you up with my cousin Paulie, he has some rings that fell off the truck and the jeweler won't take 'em back.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:48
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spog posted:Starting at 5k or at just 5 ? lol. Thanks guys, I guess I'm going to figure this out. For those of you that have bought rings, if I have a general idea of what I want is it better to go to some place on Jeweler's Row in NY/Chicago, or go online with Blue Nile/James Allen?
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Mar 13, 2017 22:48
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Just throw reason or logic or Optimal Economic Decisionmaking out the goddamn window with rings. Maybe your partner will think they're stupid and you should make a down payment on a house or whatever, or maybe she'll want to have the biggest + 10% diamond in her group of friends. It won't be the first or last time you spend too much money on your dumb wife's dumb interests Like always, talk to your partner and make sure you're on the same page. It's not an awkward conversation to ask her what Ring Budget she's expecting/comfortable with.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:49
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GoGoGadgetChris posted:Just throw reason or logic or Optimal Economic Decisionmaking out the goddamn window with rings. Maybe your partner will think they're stupid and you should make a down payment on a house or whatever, or maybe she'll want to have the biggest + 10% diamond in her group of friends. Thankfully, unless something really changes, she'll be just as capable of spending her own money on her own interests.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:52
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Residency Evil posted:lol. Pawn shop. I'm 100% serious. Rings on the cheap from broken marriages.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:53
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Residency Evil posted:Thankfully, unless something really changes, she'll be just as capable of spending her own money on her own interests. You're not gonna buy her birthday presents or buy your own ticket when you fly to her family's for Thanksgiving?
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Mar 13, 2017 22:54
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Residency Evil posted:lol. Find a discount diamond store in person. Either get your own setting elsewhere or go with one of their basic options, you can always change it out later. Do not buy your diamond from any store that advertises on TV, radio or whatever. We got a half carat princess in white gold setting for under $2k CAD. And yeah, depends entirely on what her best friend has.
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Mar 13, 2017 22:56
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GoGoGadgetChris posted:You're not gonna buy her birthday presents or buy your own ticket when you fly to her family's for Thanksgiving? I mean sure, but that's going to be offset by her buying the Diet Coke for the year. 
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Mar 13, 2017 23:01
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Residency Evil posted:I mean sure, but that's going to be offset by her buying the Diet Coke for the year. I'm just saying, we're never done spending money on our spouses, even if we've got separate bank accounts and we bust out the TI-83 when the dinner check comes.
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Mar 13, 2017 23:03
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In all seriousness, here are the things you can do to reduce the cost (if you choose to): #1 - Don't buy a diamond. Buy a strong stone that will still last, yes, but don't buy a diamond. Moissanite is great from a sparkly white stone perspective. Sapphires and rubies are good. Emeralds are good if in protected settings without too much face exposure. There are plenty of other good lab-made stones too. #2 - Buy a lab-made version of the expensive stone you want. (Cheaper than buying a real diamond or sapphire, but still way more expensive usually than moissanite or some of the other lab stones.) #3 - Buy from a pawn shop, used jewelry store, or estate sale. (Double-check for appraisal to be certain you aren't being ripped off.) #4 - Build it yourself through individual stone sourcing and then contract separate jewelers, etc etc. This might not save you a ton compared to the used options, but it'll let you feel way the hell better about your purchase than supporting some horrible chain. #5 - Don't go to any major jewelry chain for your ring. Jared's, etc etc, are loving awful. Just don't do it. Pick and choose as you see fit from these and you can drop the ring cost pretty significantly. I humblebrag humblebragged my ring to only humblebrag dollars.
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Mar 13, 2017 23:03
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GoGoGadgetChris posted:
This. Talk to the drat person you are gonna spend the rest of yer life with and figure out priorities. Figure out what is important to them, what's important to you and decide from there. I'm a big fan of having significant stuff engraved on the inside of the ring and making considered decisions about what metals and/or gemstones are used. Having a convoluted explanation behind the ring makes sorta-interesting small talk, which is a plus. Edit: good advice up above me^^ The Lemondrop Dandy fucked around with this message at 23:15 on Mar 13, 2017 |
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Mar 13, 2017 23:12
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If you or her have some older family members who hold on to valuables check the family vaults for heirloom rings. No purchase necessary and it is quite meaningful.
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Mar 13, 2017 23:20
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Back to lovely work clothes, my dumbass brother spent about $1600 on 3 suits right after he graduated mortuary school and then proceeded to do nothing with the suits or his career for the next 4 years. He did finally get a job at a funeral home, but they like you to buy your suits through them so the $1600 was still pretty much wasted.
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Mar 13, 2017 23:20
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He should just wear the suits. Suits are awesome. Walk briskly and wear a suit, and nobody will ever question you.
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Mar 13, 2017 23:21
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Is fiancee also in a job that has limitations on jewelry? Consider that in your ring design if so. I know of a number of people in medical jobs who swapped out their big honkin' pointy rock of a ring for something lower profile, so they could wear it underneath gloves. Not being able to wear it at work where you spend half your waking hours can be a bummer. Or just get two, whatever. This isn't the Good With Money thread. I haven't filed a tax return since 2012 (self.personalfinance) submitted 7 hours ago by pleasesayimnotfucked quote:My father always did my taxes, in 2013 he got put into hospice care and suddenly asking him to file all the forms for me wasn't something he could do anymore so I didn't ask him. I work in tech, but can't be bothered to type some really simple stuff into TurboTax online? 
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Mar 13, 2017 23:23
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