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Tijuana Bibliophile
Dec 30, 2008

Scratchmo
time for the :siren:2nd anniversary memorial Benjamin J. Lesnikc challenge:siren:

you gotta pound it to this



then admit to it in the thread

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Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat
Hey so what's going on in the thread today guys

Tokyo Sexwale
Jul 30, 2003

Foo Diddley posted:

Hey so what's going on in the thread today guys

been a good day for the thread imo

DapperDon
Sep 7, 2016

Crazy_BlackParrot posted:

I'd hit that pink UK girl.
and I mean that in a sexual way,

Nothing wrong with a little hoggin every now and then. I don't kinkshame.

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
I'd say the more important question is what Crobs had for lunch

A) Junior Chicken
B) Nobu

paid for by

A) backer funds

:shrug:

DapperDon
Sep 7, 2016

cool new Polack jokes posted:

I'd say the more important question is what Crobs had for lunch

A) Junior Chicken
B) Nobu

paid for by

A) backer funds

:shrug:

For some reason I picture him driving to The Terranea Resort in Rancho Palos Verdes for lunch and a massage. The backers will never care.

AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them
Grimey Drawer
Thread bad, CIG need a new gently caress up to save it.

AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them
Grimey Drawer
Year 5 Subscriber Perks Update!



quote:

Greetings Citizens,

We are kicking off the Year Five of the Star Citizen development subscriber program! Becoming a subscriber gives you access to exclusive perks. Each month you can look forward to a new behind-the-scenes issue of our digital magazine Jump Point and a piece of digital flair to decorate your hangar with, as well as the ability to test fly different loaner ships like the Starfarer, Gladius and Sabre. Subscribers also receive merchandise discounts, coupons (after every 12 months of accumulated subscription time) and access to exclusive digital sales, as well as the chance to submit questions for our shows!

Additionally, if you become a subscriber before April 17th, you’ll receive a special piece of bonus flair; a Big Bennys vending machine to decorate your hangar with! This flair will be distributed to all active subscribers on April 18, 2017.

Due to popular demand, we’ll also be offering a physical edition of Jump Point Volume 3 in the coming months. Subscribers will be the first to have a chance to purchase this at exclusive discounted price. If you’re a subscriber, keep an eye on the Den for additional updates on this in the near future.

You can find more details about becoming a subscriber here!.

AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them
Grimey Drawer


Grab! Eat!

DapperDon
Sep 7, 2016

AP posted:

Thread bad, CIG need a new gently caress up to save it.

Wouldn't it be cool if we could somehow incorporate one of those old dos txt based MUD games into the thread during these times?

Strangler 42
Jan 8, 2007

SHAVE IT ALL OFF
ALL OF IT

"Do we have anymore finished space plants or fish to give these rubes? gently caress! What do we have lying around? Okay, the vending machine this month, next month give them a guard rail, then a fire extinguisher."

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler

I like that being a subscriber means you get access to exclusive sales. Best perk you could ask for.

Drunk Theory fucked around with this message at 23:28 on Mar 24, 2017

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

They really just can't get off that vending machine. They think it's some kind of organic viral marketing.

It's almost like the only physical object that existed in the world, and could be shoved around into random locations, gave players a last ditch sad and boring thing to do with the cargo bays on their $500 ships.

Hey guys, everybody loves Big Benny's!

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

Imagine a point of interest in GTA5 being that you can shove around a vending machine.

AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them
Grimey Drawer
https://www.twitch.tv/videos/130888264?t=4h25m30s

:gary:

When you're nearly 4 and half hours into your stream and mention that nobody is playing Star Marine and you've only managed one match.

AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them
Grimey Drawer


Trying to get more players from Spectrum chat.

DapperDon
Sep 7, 2016

AP posted:



Trying to get more players from Spectrum chat.

THAT is loving sad right there.

Zzr
Oct 6, 2016

It's not a good idea to create 4 levels of differents test space when you have a playerbase of 80.

Zzr
Oct 6, 2016

And you have to divise that by modules again.

Chalks
Sep 30, 2009

Haha you remember that time we named a fast food vending machine after our morbidly obese community manager then we fired him and kept the vending machine hahahahaha good times.

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

They're on to 2.6.2b now?

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

I forgot to ask. Remember how one player shoving the machine around in their instance didn't show the machine in anyone else's instance? Did they fix that yet?

revmoo
May 25, 2006

#basta

Chalks posted:

Haha you remember that time we named a fast food vending machine after our morbidly obese community manager then we fired him and kept the vending machine hahahahaha good times.

Ben got fired?

Can I get a recap from when ds got banned till now? Just bullet points is cool, ty.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

Hopefully 2.6.2c will reduce match size to 1.

Chalks
Sep 30, 2009

revmoo posted:

Ben got fired?

Can I get a recap from when ds got banned till now? Just bullet points is cool, ty.

Oh I don't know he spends all of his time tweeting wing commander poo poo now and I don't think he's been in any of their "content" for ages.

If he's not fired imagine I'm posting from the inevitable future in which he is.

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

revmoo posted:

Ben got fired?

Can I get a recap from when ds got banned till now? Just bullet points is cool, ty.

Not officially, he's just kind of seemed to be getting shoved into the background for the last few months.

He's now spending his time digitizing Wing Commander production Beta Max tapes. 100s and 100s of them.

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler

revmoo posted:

Ben got fired?

Can I get a recap from when ds got banned till now? Just bullet points is cool, ty.

Ben did not get fired. Instead he was removed from being an outward facing employee. Now instead he works the important job of apparently digitizing something..."I have no idea what, more Wing Commander poo poo". Very much a "knows where the bodies are buried" situation.

As for bullet points.

  • Star Marine is out, it's a terribly buggy arena shooter, but finally they managed to release an FPS in Cryengine
  • More ship sales, more demos claiming to be real gameplay.
  • Patches continue to get less and less substantial.
  • Communication has gone down the space toilet. Unless you count Sandi posting on twitter about Mocap or art assets to be open development

  • In the last 500 years, the Fourth Stimpire has dominated four systems, which it has united into one starzone, Stimsis. The Fourth Stimpire has origins from the Ten Empire War in which 10 of the United Stimpires revolted against each rules. All empires except for the fourth swore freedom upon their citizens. There is no free speech in the Fourth Stimpire, and all self-controlled transportation has been made illegal without undergoing painful medical verification methods, in which arteries are severed without pain resistant, operated entirely by machines. The way they work claim to be the most hygenic and healthy way possible, but these machines often rub against pain points, causing great deals of pain to patients. The heart is then extracted from the body and placed into a glass grinding machine. Various energy centers are also dissected and replaced with dangerous transplants. After the painful, 52 hour surgical procedure, patients will then have to use a fused guidance tool, which pumps painful resistors into the body every 2 hours. The pain they have caused is so bad, the victim would freeze in a tense position. They would then collapse afterwards.

    Sexual stimulation in any way within the grounds of the Fourth Stimpire is strictly prohibited, and anyone detected even touching their sexual organs will be subjected to a penectomy or if the offender was a female, they would then have a razor inserted into their ovaries. They would pump a blue solution into the womb until the stitchings burst. Offenders would also be forced to show their operated areas in public, and they would always harass and punch them to a pulp, against their will.

    Otherwise, offenders would be tazed with the worst type of electricity in the systematic district, causing so much pain, the victim would scream and flail in madness. The pain would also triple every second, but no death would be incurred. This is also used in combat against enemy units, which is why all UEE forces must wear the upgraded suit to block this effect.

    However, enertainment is also questionable in UEE grounds. Sporting events end with the losing team being rounded into a grinder and shredded on live television, boxing matches end with the loser having their hands removed without anasthesia, flight races would end with the losers having their arms and legs removed, then being injected with insanity, for entertainment. People are also forced into these events, by undergoing a painful 127 hour procedure which involves tweaking the muscles so they will not listen to brain commands, and then having a painful drug injected which also causes madness if the player is not sporting. This is all for entertainment, and anyone not watching any of it during sporting times and cheering for the winning team, they will be imprisoned into galactic camps.

    Snuff films are also broadcast, and actors are actually murdered just for entertainment. Stealth droids also guide these forced actors into behaving exactly as the director dreams, otherwise they will be punished by being placed into a macerator and having their execution written into the film. Any film that does not feature someone being murdered will be burned and the entire crew behind it will be executed in the most grotesque way possible - vivisection.

    All executions are broadcast, and anyone who misses even a millisecond, even by blinking, will be executed. All citizens must boo to the person being executed, and the family is gathered to be injected with eternators, which cause pain forever, making them immoral but feeling the pain tenfold every millisecond. They cannot pass out, but they will feel like it forever.

    Conquests by this Stimpire end in the planet being razed, and all the citizens being executed in the same way as their citizens are. The planet is then destroyed and all remnants of it are removed, and any memories of it will be erased instantly from civil minds. People who are also killed are also erased from memories, and all memories of them, including toys and pictures, are destroyed.

    Prisoners undergo 40,000 years of relentless and endless labor, and anyone not complying is sentenced to the eternator injection. All prisoners injected with eternators are placed into capsules and launched into far space, then the room is closed tight to ensure maximum insanity. Some prisoners are also subjected to the removal of blood, the lungs, the liver, the genitals, the skeleton, the muscles, the eyes, and even the injection of pressure. Prisoners sentenced to pressure chambers are locked in until they are inflated to a high level. The decompression is then stopped to make sure they are inflated and uncomfortable.

    Children born on the 14th of July are subjected to the removal of their skeleton and an implant of a silver liquid to replace it. The nervous sysem is also injected in various parts to ensure it is five times more sensitive than the average.

    Restaurants also are ordered to serve civil meat, and anyone attending must give themself up to be cooked into a grotesque meal. They are cooked alive, undergoing extreme pain, and are then subjected to industrial grinders and blenders. The Stimpire orders at least 1 million citizens to be dispatched every day, as they are afraid the population may overthrow them. But only one planet is cared for, and the rest are banned from eating, drinking, talking, using technology, touching anyone, wearing unauthorized clothes, touching buildings, or walking a centimeter out of designated routes. Civil enforcers are on every planet, and they are engineered so that they are 40 times larger than the 300 quadrillion population. At least 7 billion die every 12 hours under this rule.

    Thoughts are also surveyed, and anyone who does not think anything to loving the Stimpire with more than their capabilities will be sentenced to a prison. Prisoners who are punished for this violation will meet their greatest fear, only to have it amplified so they will turn insane as they imagine it exactly as they fear it. They then undergo a painful extraction of all fluids, to be replaced by a toxin which causes permanent irritation. The unknown substance keeps the subject aging normally, except they will never die. Prisoners punished in this way are unable to be reverted, despite many efforts, and they will never be able to be disposed.

    The sickening truths have been revealed only today, and invigilation teams are still investigating the truths without setting foot in the galactic space of this sickening empire.

Drunk Theory fucked around with this message at 23:53 on Mar 24, 2017

happyhippy
Feb 21, 2005

Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup
Pillbug
Q. Does the Vending Machine actually vend anything?

big nipples big life
May 12, 2014

A. Happiness

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat

happyhippy posted:

Q. Does the Vending Machine actually vend anything?

Yes. As soon as Vend 2.0 is out. They're considering working on starting to implement the pipelines that will allow Vend 2.0 to get worked on at some point in the future, so it's basically out already

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler

happyhippy posted:

Q. Does the Vending Machine actually vend anything?

Not yet, but they are going to add options to exchange pictures of digital noodles for cash shop tokens in 2.6.3.

I love that we've got a 2.6.2b now. How many levels deep of version numbers and letters deep do you think they'll go to pretend at progress?

tooterfish
Jul 13, 2013

XK posted:

They really just can't get off that vending machine. They think it's some kind of organic viral marketing.

It's almost like the only physical object that existed in the world, and could be shoved around into random locations, gave players a last ditch sad and boring thing to do with the cargo bays on their $500 ships.

Hey guys, everybody loves Big Benny's!
It doesn't though does it? I thought it was a client side object?

i.e. the server doesn't simulate its physics, so your particular copy doesn't exist for other people.

AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them
Grimey Drawer
https://twitter.com/SandiGardiner/status/845362913116237824

Blue On Blue
Nov 14, 2012

I think it's hilarious they posted the road map showing all mocap was done officially and then the past 2 days have been nothing but 'Look at all the mocap we're doing with this new expensive gear!'

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

tooterfish posted:

It doesn't though does it? I thought it was a client side object?

i.e. the server doesn't simulate its physics, so your particular copy doesn't exist for other people.

That's what lead to my follow up question. I know it didn't used to exist for other people, and I suspect it still doesn't.

Maybe that'll be in patch 2.6.2c.

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube


Why is any of this happening?

The shitizen's explanation is that this will be used for in-universe news broadcasts, but why not just use video for that?

I don't think they even know what they are doing anymore.

:negative:

Xaerael
Aug 25, 2010

Marching Powder is objectively the worst poster known. He also needs to learn how a keyboard works.

Drunk Theory posted:

Not yet, but they are going to add options to exchange pictures of digital noodles for cash shop tokens in 2.6.3.

I love that we've got a 2.6.2b now. How many levels deep of version numbers and letters deep do you think they'll go to pretend at progress?

It's OK, keyboards have loads of symbols and there's always Roman numerals to fall back on.

Can't wait for Star Citizen ver. 2.6.2.~.XXVI

Scruffpuff
Dec 23, 2015

Fidelity. Wait, was I'm working on again?

XK posted:

They really just can't get off that vending machine. They think it's some kind of organic viral marketing.

It's almost like the only physical object that existed in the world, and could be shoved around into random locations, gave players a last ditch sad and boring thing to do with the cargo bays on their $500 ships.

Hey guys, everybody loves Big Benny's!

I noticed it too. Practically everything in Star Citizen works this way - everything is "Hello Fellow Kids!" with them.

It's not even a server-side object to boot. I guess they need Persistence 3.0 for that.

Raskolnikov
Nov 25, 2003

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arrested_development

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Raskolnikov
Nov 25, 2003

we did it SA

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