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May 29, 2024 00:53
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- MinionOfCthulhu
- Oct 28, 2005
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I got this title for free due to my proximity to an idiot who wanted to save $5 on an avatar by having someone else spend $9.95 instead.
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Elsa is a treasure and also is all that writing really longhand? That is something!
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Mar 26, 2017 00:06
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- Bubblyblubber
- Nov 17, 2014
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Elsa is indeed these dead gay forums best comeback story.
My (32F) wife (30F) of 4 years is "over-teaching" our kids (2 and 4M). EVERYTHING is either a learning experience or an opportunity to learn a "skill". I feel like I'm living in a children's workbook and I can't anymore.
quote:u/PlsStopTeaching
No, my wife is not actually a teacher.
So our kids are to the ages where they're becoming little people and it's awesome. Our older LOVES being a big brother, and the younger is growing by leaps and bounds. Life is pretty damned good.
Except we can't go out of the house without it being a completely out of control "learning experience" or an opportunity for "skill building".
The best way to illustrate this is through examples.
The other day we're at the grocery store. The older boy is walking, the younger is in the shopping cart. We have like 10 or so things to buy.
And there's my wife to our older son, who we'll call John, I guess.
"John, can you count how many items are in the cart? What line should we go in? Do we need to wait our turn? Is it our turn yet? Oh look, it's our turn! What do we do with our things? No, we don't put them on the desk, that's not called a desk, it's called a "checkstand". Can you say that word honey? Checkstand What's the person we pay called? Can you read his name? This thing is called a credit card, do you know how it works?"
On and on and on and ON. Everyone in that drat line was rolling their eyes and giving me sympathetic looks.
Sometimes my wife will let the younger, "Bill" help or be present during chores and meal prep or things like that. It's more of the same. "Bill, this is a spoon. This is a knife. This is called a ladel and this is what we do with it. This is a cup. These are noodles, we need to put them in water that's boiling, and you know water is boiling when you see bubbles, to make them soft enough to eat. This is dish soap, it makes the dishes clean!" HE'S TWO FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!
It's just everything is "learned" to death. The other night we were out for a walk and a little kitten darted across the street. Now, a normal parent might ask the kid what animal that was. If he says a cat or a kitten, she'd say "Good job" and move on.
John said it was a cat. My wife said "Yes it's a cat, but it's a baby cat! Do you know what a baby cat is called? Is a cat a mammal or a reptile? How do you know? How do mammals raise their young? Do all mammals have fur?"
I told her I was getting a headache, she could finish the walk with the kids and meet me at home. It wasn't a lie, really.
Something similar happened at the fair too. I'm not exaggerating when I say the kids never got to go on ONE ride and never got to eat ONE treat because they were so busy learning and "building skills" and I can't even deal with that phrase anymore. It makes me want to scream.
Any time I bring it up, like "Honey, just let them have fun. We can talk about what they learned on the way home" I'll get "But this is such a great opportunity for them to build skills! They won't remember in 2 hours!" If I want to get them a simple, stupid toy that's just for fun, like something they can throw around or a stuffed toy or something, nope, that doesn't help them build any skills! Or a ball is "great for helping them build coordination skills!"
Everything, EVERYTHING in our lives in a learning experience. It's either skill building (OAOIHFAWFIOWEHFAOAHIIOFWEAH I CAN'T ANYMORE!!!) or we/the kids never get to DO the activity because we have to learn about it.
I've talked to her. God knows I've talked to her. I've said it great she wants to give our kids such a head start, and make sure they have good life skills for when they need them but everything doesn't need to be a learning activity. They can't just color random designs on paper, they have to build skills! Then we have to go through the primary colors and learn about crayons and then do some skill building or "enrichment" activity.
They can't just have fun. They can't just PLAY.
After the fair, I lost my poo poo that night. She was getting undressed and remarked how much fun the kids had. I am not proud to say I blew my stack. This was after AT LEAST 100 conversations with various approaches about this, and I ended up shouting "No, they did NOT have fun! They didn't get to ride the Ferris wheel, they got a physics lesson. They didn't get to eat deep fried anything, they got a nutrition lesson. They didn't get to play games, they got a counting lesson. They didn't get to try to win a goldfish, they got a zoology lesson. NOTHING THE KIDS DID COULD POSSIBLY CONSIDERED FUN IN ANY UNIVERSE!!!"
And now I'm an "apathetic" father leaving her to "do all the teaching" when they're "my kids too".
I'm at the end of my rope. It's not like I NEVER want them to have learning experiences. It's not like I NEVER want them to do anything educational. But they need to just be loving kids sometimes too, and she thinks she's "making learning fun" when nothing is fun anymore.
And I can't listen to anymore of these buzzwords like skill building and enrichment and everything repeated 50 times to the kids or I'm going to lose my ever loving mind.
HELP ME REDDIT!!!
tl;dr My life is an elemetary school classroom, my kids never get to just have fun because they always have to learn. Apparently that makes me a terrible father. Wife won't even entertain my opinions on the matter, who do I do?
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Mar 26, 2017 01:29
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- Lottery of Babylon
- Apr 25, 2012
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STRAIGHT TROPIN'
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edit: it's probably just fine for the kids
nope
UPDATE posted:I didn't mean to completely abandon this post. I just had no idea it would blow up like it did, and by the time I got home from work, there were more comments than I could possibly answer. THANK YOU everyone! To answer some questions I saw: the kids are bored to death. Bill, being only 2, isn't super verbal obviously, but John has asked on more than one occasion why we can't do what we came for, basically. Using the Fair again, he asked why he couldn't go on the [kiddie] Ferris wheel. My wife basically ignored him and just kept teaching. That's part of the reason why I was so mad that night. It seems MUCH more about her than the kids' development at all. I talk to my sons a lot, or at least I try to. I can't really bring up anything without my wife coming in and teaching or suggesting we do something else to build some skills. I feel like she's actually getting in the way of my own relationship with my kids. I guess I had more to unpack about this than I thought. But on to the update. This couldn't have been timed any better if I'd planned it. So John is 4. We have him in a pre-K type class 3 days a week. The very day I made my post, I got a call from the teacher. She basically told me that John is a very smart little boy, that he seems to know a little bit about everything and has a great vocabulary and memory. But what she said next just about made me tear up and seriously consider a divorce. There have been several instances since the class started where John has been left to his own devices. They have some structured activities during the day, and some semi structured. Like times when the kids will be painting, but they're free to paint whatever and however they want. They also have some unstructured time, where they're free to play with the toys in the classroom. Some are learning type toys, some are just toys like the large Lego blocks, stuffed toys, balls, things like that. Well, the first time John was presented with watercolor paints and a blank piece of paper, he did nothing. The teacher blew it off as nervousness, since this is a lot of kid's first experience with being around a large number of peers away from home. She also noticed he didn't really play much with the other children. She tried to help him join in some of their games, but he didn't seem interested. She decided to call me after this incident: the class was given a box of metallic crayons and a black piece of construction paper. John did the same thing again. The teacher came over and asked him what he'd like to draw. He said he didn't know. She gave some suggestions like his favorite cartoon character, if we have a cat or a dog to draw his pet, if we didn't, draw a cat or a dog he might LIKE to have, draw a space alien and a spaceship, and he still said he didn't know what to draw. After a few more suggestions from the teacher, John apparently looked at her and said "I just don't know what skill I'm supposed to learning". Like I said I nearly broke down. I guess I never put it together. I should have, but I never did, and I'm as much at fault for that as my wife is for this whole thing. My sons have NO social skills. They have NO creativity. They have NO imagination. They don't know that sometimes the purpose of fun is to have fun because they've never been exposed to it. I kinda hate myself for not extrapolating this. So basically we're raising walking encyclopedias with no personality. They aren't actually building ANY skills at all. I have a feeling they'd learn to hold crayons and draw by the time they're old enough to leave the house. They'll also be able to count, cook a simple meal, and understand that a washing machine gets clothes clean. What they WON'T understand is the really important stuff. They won't make and learn from mistakes with friends. They won't be able to relate to kids their own ages. They won't understand what activities are appropriate and not appropriate when they get older and start doing things without us. They'll probably end up codependent because they'll always be waiting for someone else to tell them what to do. They'll be abuse magnets. I had a come to Jesus with my wife when she got home. I didn't let her call the teacher and "tell her what's what", instead, I told her that I'd called a family therapist, and if she wanted to stay married, we were also going to couples counseling. No ifs, ands, or buts on any of it. SHE needs to build some drat parenting skills, and I need to learn how to grasp the concept of If A, Then B. I did not leave room for negotiation. I accept my fault in this. I was an only child myself, my parents were pretty hands off, for the most part, and I haven't really had a lot of occasion in my adult life to spend a great deal of time with young children, or with other parents of young children. Just because I knew what was wrong, apparently didn't automatically teach me what was right. I also want us to go to parenting classes eventually, but that's at a different point assuming we get through all the rest of this stuff. I want to thank everyone for their comments, and I'll be more attentive to this thread if there's anything else you'd like to know. tl;dr We're raising socially retarded robots who don't understand fun and have no personalities. I'm just as much at fault and am trying to fix it in a big way.
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Mar 26, 2017 01:45
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- Waterbed Wendy
- Jan 29, 2009
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Those poor little robokids. Imagine sitting a child down in front of an inherently child-like activity such as finger paints and them look up at you blankly while saying "WHAT SKILL IS TO BE LEARNED, ADULT"
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Mar 26, 2017 01:55
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- FactsAreUseless
- Feb 16, 2011
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Those kids are going to run the world. They will be distracted by nothing.
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Mar 26, 2017 02:00
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- 54 40 or fuck
- Jan 4, 2012
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No Yanda's allowed
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What are the odds she's a mommy blogger
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Mar 26, 2017 02:10
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- sephiRoth IRA
- Jun 13, 2007
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"Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."
-Carl Sagan
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I was so on board with the mom for the first part of that and then it just got worse, and worse and just holy poo poo, mom give it a rest sometimes. I love teaching our daughter stuff but poo poo, just let them be kids.
That said, use of "I can't even" should be a felony. Dad needs to go to catchphrase jail.
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Mar 26, 2017 02:26
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- Bubblyblubber
- Nov 17, 2014
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WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG???
Me [30M] with my gf/ex [30F] 3.5 years, she kicked me out a month ago, I'm proposing today, nervous
quote:u/throwaway24879
Lived together 3 years. Very loving relationship, but a lot of aggression on her end sometimes when stressed caused a lot of friction and communicational distance between us. My job was also a source of stress, several times close to closing high 5 figure entires lately, most falling through in the end. I was also not always the cleanest, and she was not sometimes the most empathetic with me. That said, many good things.
She kicked me out a month ago over cheating allegations and aggression, not true on my end. There were many, many things to work on, but this is my last ditch effort to establish communication. I don't like how she has treated me at times for a while, but if I get a resounding no then I'm free to move out of the country and pursue my own dreams that don't include her.
I have no idea what she will say, but I know she loves me. I may come back to /r/relationships if she says yes/no, with some honest reflection about the whole thing. If she is to say yes, the relationship is in shambles and many things need to be worked on to have a chance. I believe we do have a chance though. I'm literally going to find out where she is and ninja-propose.
I need an operation soon, so if this doesn't work, I'll get that done, heal up and go live to another city.
tl;dr: Proposing to girl I lived a tumultuous, strong relationship with for 3 years, been out of the apartment for one month, she won't return my calls. I think we can do much better with communication and she has asked about this in the past. If this doesn't work, I'm moving to other places for a few months.
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Mar 26, 2017 02:36
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- Bubblyblubber
- Nov 17, 2014
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Y'all want a  -rollercoaster? 'Cause I've got a wild one here for ya:
Me [35M] feel suffocated by my wife’s [35F] overbearing / controlling personality, divorce looming. Are my feelings justified or do I just need to man up and make this work?
quote:u/OppressedThrowaway1
Background: We met in highschool, married when we were 19, we have kids now. Our family is stable for the most part. I am college educated, have a good job, we own a nice home, my kids are good kids. There is no drama, drug abuse, infidelity, etc in our relationship. Sex life has always been great, although it has been damaged by the erosion of our relationship in the past year. I get along great with her family. She is beautiful, intelligent, loyal, and is a great mother – all things I admire about her.
Despite all the positives, I feel she is overbearing in many aspects of our relationship – some of these seem petty to me, which is why I am asking for perspective. I feel like I can live without many of these things, but I’ve never seen some of these issues in any other couples I’ve ever known, including her own siblings.
Overbearing issue 1: movies and tv. If it has sex, immodest clothing, or even implied sex that she doesn’t like then I can’t watch it. We have this filter thing that allows us to watch movies that remove sexual content and that’s fine with me – I don’t find watching other people having sex entertaining really. My issue is when I suggest a movie that I think sounds good, and she is turned off about it of some of the content. Likewise with TV shows. It could be 99% a great movie but because of one scene she’ll resist seeing it. She’ll read the detailed description of the movie’s content online and be disgusted by it. Her own siblings will ask me – have you seen such and such a movie? No I say, I haven’t seen it… A recent example is Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – not that this is a must see movie or anything, but she read online somewhere that April O’Neil wears “tight and immodest clothing” throughout the movie and she fought me when I suggested seeing it.
This carries over to other areas as well. I can’t share a YouTube video that I think is funny because she would disapprove of me being on YouTube at all.
Overbearing issue 2: Drinking. She was raised Mormon and her family still is. I was Mormon with her for 10 years. We left in 2007, and I started drinking a couple years later. Initially I was expressing my newfound independence, but over time I came to really like drinking wine. Admittedly I was drinking too often – pretty much every weekend. On a few occasions I went overboard and drank too much. What can I say – I spent my 20’s as a Mormon and was just now, in my 30’s discovering my limits.
One particular weekend a year ago it was a really sunny day – the first in a long time because winters are long here – and I wanted to sit outside and have some sangria. I drank too much and got drunk. By that evening, when we were to have my son’s birthday party, I was functionally drunk. She was justifiably annoyed – because of the birthday party, but also because she had a big test the next day and needed to study. Here I was, completely out of it when she needed a fully functioning parent to help out.
We got in an argument and I went upstairs to the bedroom. She shoved me from behind, and I stumbled forward, almost falling. As an impulse reaction I turned around and slapped her across the face.
Slapping her has been really damaging for our relationship. I have never hit her before, and I regret it tremendously. She has now associated drinking with loss of control, abuse, and all the negative connotations that she was raised with growing up Mormon. This has resulted in a lot of push back on me drinking.
While this may not seem like a big deal, having a couple glasses of wine to relax has become something I really enjoy. I have no social life at all – no friends, and I rarely see my own family even. I don’t go to bars or clubs – my preference is to have a drink at home, in my back yard or while watching a good movie. Taking this away to me, feels like there is nothing enjoyable about my life at all. On the other hand, I can see that she is being protective of home. She prefers that I go out to drink, although I think she would consider anything more than one drink overdoing it.
To sum it all up, I guess the overbearing aspects of my marriage play into the feeling that my whole life is oppressive. A typical day for me is: get up early, drop my girls off at school, go to work, emails, meetings, phone calls, coworkers. Come home, make dinner (I usually cook), clean up and do the dishes, get the kids to bed. Sleep. Repeat. The weekends are a mix of projects, catching up on laundry and house cleaning from the week, and trying to have some fun and relax a little.
The appeal in divorce to me is a sense of personal freedom that life has not afforded me since I was a teenager. I’m not talking about go-off-the-deep-end be irresponsible freedom, but just the freedom to enjoy simple pleasures of life – my own space, having 100% control of little things like what to do with my time, etc.
I love this girl so much, and I have so much to be grateful for. Are these serious issues that would cause any couple to divorce, or do I just need to man up and make this marriage work?
tl;dr: I feel oppressed by my marriage, are my feelings justified or do I just need to man up?
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Mar 26, 2017 02:44
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- Dunning Krugerrand
- Dec 23, 2015
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purestrain pyrite
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Here's a doozy, especially the update post.
I[42F] am having issues with my SIL [44F], recently it turned very ugly, she attacked me outside church/my children's school
quote:I really need some help dealing with a tricky family situation. It has been building and came to a head last Friday. I really don't like to talk about money, but this issue centers on it and so there is no choice. I also feel I need to give some background for this to make enough sense to garner some solid advice. I'll give as much detail as I can while trying to still keep it vague there are a lot of people involved. I'm sorry it is so long.
tl;dr: SIL is upset at the wealth gap in our family and its making every gathering and everyone extremely uncomfortable. I want to fix this, how?
I grew up pretty solidly middle class and my husband Jay (48m) grew up working poor. My father spent 20 years in the military then 30 years with a union and my mother was a SAHM - neither attended college. It was very important to my parents that both my brother and I attend college. My brother Mark (48m) ended up attending a service academy, so no tuition. I ended up with enough scholarship money to make my own full ride at a private university. Our parents gifted us the money they would have put towards our tuition upon our respective graduations. My husband worked his butt off to get through undergrad, grad and an MBA all while working full time and sometimes supporting family members. He and I are coming up on our 18th wedding anniversary this summer. He is an executive and I worked at a nonprofit for 5 years before becoming a SAHM. My life revolves around our 4 children, though I still find plenty of time for volunteer work. We are incredibly lucky. Live a very charmed life and we don't take it for granted, at least I hope.
My husband has a large family. His mother (66f) Dee, one younger brother Tim (46m) and sister Leigh (45f) live in the same area we do and we see them the most frequently of his relatives. My parents and my brother and his family live near us as well. We are all very close and spend a lot of time together including vacations. My parents are retired. My brother spent 20 in the military and then went into a second well paying career, his wife Jess (45f), also retired military, is a hospital administrator. Leigh and her wife Amy (39f) own a very successful salon/day spa. Tim is a deputy sheriff. He is also a widower who remarried Emily (44f) four years ago and navigating her feelings is what I need help with.
Emily came into our lives suddenly. It had been about 10 months since Tim's wife had passed away. She showed up at Leigh's salon and said Tim "sent her" to get "dolled up". A couple weeks after that Tim started bringing her to family events. I felt bad for Emily. No one liked her and it was palpable. Five weeks later she announced she was pregnant at Tim's daughter's first communion. In front of his deceased wife's parents. She told everyone she was on the pill and it must have failed. No one really believed her. Tim married her two weeks later in Las Vegas.
When they opened our gift Tim flipped out with happiness and her face fell. She looked incredulous and said she thought we would get them a house. We had given them a trip to Hawaii for their honeymoon, since Vegas was going to serve as their honeymoon too, we thought this would be a nice treat. We would be caring for our nieces and even offered to take Emily's children or hire childcare. My husband said, rather calmly to his credit, that the trip could be used towards a down payment instead. She clicked her tongue and said "What a nice gift a mortgage and no honeymoon, welcome to the family!" She was positively glaring at me. Before anyone could say anything else my husband took my hand and we left. Later, when they got back from Hawaii, she apologized, saying that since we had bought townhomes for both our parents, she assumed we'd gift them a house too. "For our children and you know so they can all be near the family in a nice safe gated community." She has 5 children and Tim has 3 and then they have 1 together.
Its been a passive aggressive spiral since then and she seems to target me the most. Look, we have money. I have expensive bags and shoes and all those totally unnecessary, but fantastic things wealthy housewives can collect. Every time its "Oh, a chanel bag, must be nice, but I'd rather my children have nice clothes." Or she'll put her foot up next to my foot and say "8000 or 19.95, I can't tell the difference can any of you?" and she'll laugh and laugh like it's an inside joke. BTW I DO NOT own 8000$ shoes. The other women in my family have the same or similar priced things, mine seem to anger Emily the most.
Hosting holidays and celebrations rotates between myself, Jess and Leigh. Thanksgiving is my holiday. For the past four years she has done something to mess it up. Year one she accidentally broke a crystal punch bowl that had been a gift to my great grandmother on her wedding day. I was devastated, but was a gracious hostess and actually believed it was an accident. Later my cousin said the only way it could have broken the way it had was for someone to pick it up and drop it straight down. It was full of red drink and made a mess, ruining some linens too. Year two our powder room overflowed. She admitted she had done that as a "fun family prank that had gone wrong, we always prank each other!" we do not. Year three my gravy was so salty it was inedible. I'm blaming it on her. She kept asking "Oh where is your giblet gravy, I just LOVE your gravy" and on and on. This past year was the worst. Amy pulled me aside and showed me a bottle of ipecac. She said she saw Emily pull it out of her purse, then pop it in real quick again when Amy walked in. Amy took it after Emily walked out. I was so panicked she might have used it already, but it was sealed. Amy and I decided not to say anything right then. Later, Emily came out from where the coats and purses were looking flush and she kept looking at Amy and looking away. I told my husband later that night and he was furious and called his brother. They had a terrible fight and have barely spoken since.
I know this is so long, but there is one more thing that happened that really put this over the top. My brother and Jess host a Super Bowl Sunday Party. They go all out. My brother not only invites our family his friends and co-workers, but also work friends of just about everyone in our family. Emily decided she wanted to host Super Bowl. She sent out invites to everyone in the family. Everyone said they would be attending Jess & Mark's party. She sent out reminders stating that it was time for someone else to be allowed to host an event and that this year was their year to host super bowl. This was the fair thing to do and she expected everyone there with a snack at 3pm BYOB. Needless to say no one showed. About an hour into the game Tim even showed up at my brothers to watch the game. I kept expecting angry calls and texts, yet heard nothing. The following Friday it all blew up.
My children attend parochial school and I am a room mom so I attend mass on Fridays with them. While this is technically a public weekday mass its a church attached to a school so all of the children are there. I was standing in the side aisle helping my class when she walks up, grabs my arm and says we need to talk. Everyone turned their heads as she didn't bother to keep her voice down. Luckily we were near a side door and we got outside before she blew up. She started screaming at me about how I ruined her life. How my jealousy of her kept her from becoming a part of the family. How I was just a pretty mean girl that never left my sorority but sooner or later, my rear end would fall and my face would rot. How she was sorry that her "hot dogs and chips weren't good enough for me and I just couldn't miss out on my super bowl porterhouse..." it was then one of our deacons walked out and I wished I could have evaporated. How ridiculous. He told us they could hear us inside. I started to apologize, she screamed "I don't loving care, pedophile!" I told her I was done and to not come to my children's school ever again. Our deacon was already pulling out his cell phone. He said to her to leave or he'd call the police. She yelled at him, her husband was "the police but she guessed he only cared about women who married walking wallets like (I) did." He started to laugh. I don't blame him, it was so absurd. I tried not to but I giggled too. I looked at her shaking my head and said "Emily..." She slapped me across the face, spit at me and walked away. I've never been so shocked. I've never been hit in my life. She left a bruise on my arm where she held on to it. She also keyed my car all up. Everyone wanted to call the police, but I asked them not to. To please let us handle this family situation. I was so embarrassed. My husband is FURIOUS. His brother came over and apologized to us both profusely. He said he would pay for my car. I wouldn't hear of it though my husband looked tempted. The whole family knows and has taken my "side" which I think makes it worse, however I am grateful for the sentiment. The whole parish knows. It was comforting Sunday to hear story after story of "crazy" in laws, but I want to fix this. How? How do I fix this with her?
UPDATE: I[42F] am having issues with my SIL [44F], recently it turned very ugly, she attacked me outside church/my children's school.
quote:I want to thank everyone for all of their kind comments and their advice. It has been a very long stressful day and while this saga is not over I do want to update you all. Again thank you it means so much to me the way you have helped. Just listening was enough and you all went above and beyond.
tl;dr Emily is on a hold and treat. Tim and his children are staying with us for a while. Amy was being tormented as well. There were temporary protective orders issued all around. There are two pretty bad things that happen here. You may want to brace yourself one involves a pet, the other feces.
Going to try to keep this short and to the point. The other post was so long and I actually edited out three stories that made that first part make sense, but it was very cathartic for me.
Day started with a family meeting at my husbands office. His mom, brother, sister and my brother. Tim, honestly he was relieved. He said he'd been ready to divorce her since the thanksgiving incident, but he said he was so embarrassed for what he had gotten himself and his three girls into. His girls are 7/9/12. My husband and his brother and my brother were on one end of the spectrum. Wanted full prosecution etc. Amy and I were the other. Lets just cut her out. Everyone else was in between. Finally decided we would file a police report, get restraining orders. Get a few more cameras for home. Tim would file for divorce and custody of their shared daughter Diane. They would stay with us for a while, then the plan was for all of them to move to a new home with Tim's mom.
We all split up my husband and I went to our attorney. Then to our church. With plans to go to the police station after. When the administrator at our diocese found out vandalism and assault had taken place on church property and authorities had not been called he was furious. So the authorities were called. Long story a bit shorter. Report filed. Temporary protective orders. Long day. All good.
Not so fast. Tim had gone home to get the girl's things and to arrange a personal leave. Emily was there. She knew something was up and I guess it was pretty ugly. She said a lot of horrible things about Beth and Beth's children apparently. Broke a lot of things and took off after saying he could have his divorce and get this his whole "crazy family". Seriously I could laugh over this if it wasn't so heartbreaking. Tim went to pull the girls from school when he got back his german shepherd was gone.
My brother's wife had my children for the afternoon. My husband, brother and I are just leaving our attorney for the second time and we get a call from our community security that there has been some vandalization. My heart sank. We get home. My bare root roses are torn up and there is feces smeared all over our door. I didn't go into what was keyed into my car, but she had keyed "oval office", "fucker you" (yes, fucker you), "beaner" and "wet back" into it and what looked like a penis. Now I'm of cuban heritage so the word she was looking for was "balsero" but it was a close enough insult. She wrote "oval office", "beaner" and "jay hosed me" in her feces on my porch. I will say it was at this point I stopped worrying about her feelings.
Police were called. My brother Mark called two of his out of work vet buddies who are now employed as our security for the foreseeable future. Now we find out from Tim that Jax (the doggie) is missing.
Emily calls him and says she will kill herself and Jax if he doesn't bring Diane to her. Tim went to meet her with the police. Jax has broken ribs and a broken leg but he also bit her up pretty badly. Apparently she just started sobbing when they took her into custody.
So we all end up at Leigh and Amy's house and this is so heartbreaking. Karen, Tim's 12yo, broke down and said she was so happy Emily was gone. She admitted that Emily would spank her and her sisters and say mean things about their "fat frumpy mother" and they should be grateful god gave them such a "cool pretty step mom". After all the children got to bed Amy told us all she was a target of Emily too. Thats why she was suspicious of her. Emily was incredulous that Amy could be a lesbian and look so feminine. So she would always point out men and make crude statements and even make dating profiles for her and try to set her up on dates. She once held her against the wall and kissed her and when Amy pushed her away she said "See I knew you weren't a dyke."
As for Emilys children they are 16, 15, (second husband) 11, 9, (boyfriend) 7 (fourth husband). 16, 15 & 7 are with their fathers. 11 & 9 are with child welfare. Tim wants to get custody of them their father has not been in the picture for a very long time.
There is a lot more detail but I'm just mentally and emotionally exhausted. We are taking all the children away for the weekend. Therapy for everyone. I'm just hoping we can get this all resolved as smoothly as possible. This is hands down the most insane most traumatic most honestly asinine thing I have ever gone through and it's still ongoing. I'm grateful I've been able to talk about it here and I hope I can keep updating because it is really helpful to me to hear outside perspective. Dunning Krugerrand fucked around with this message at 03:31 on Mar 26, 2017
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Mar 26, 2017 03:22
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- Khorne
- May 1, 2002
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Ok, so she hasn't shed her Mormon upbringing but you're an alcohol abuser who slapped your wife. Hmmmmmmmmm
It sounds like she is an awful person to be around and he's trying to do the growing up he didn't do during the first 30 years of his life.
I mean, she doesn't sound truly awful or anything, like she's probably an alright person and all, but I know I couldn't put up with that crap. I would just constantly be watching stuff and not giving a gently caress if I were in his position. I'd invite the kids to watch it with me. Unless she takes him to mormon court for the divorce it's not going to matter.
His wife's response also seems perfectly reasonable to being hit. Heck, breaking up is reasonable even though it's kinda awkward knowing you did the same thing to him first. I've been hit before and it really does change how you view a person. My big takeaway from this post is people suck and how do you date someone like that or become a mormon in the first place. I guess in his case he was on board with all this stuff and now he's moving farther and farther away from mormon insanity while she's maintaining the status quo.
Khorne fucked around with this message at 04:06 on Mar 26, 2017
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Mar 26, 2017 03:33
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- therobit
- Aug 19, 2008
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I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
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She shoved him from behind and he stumbled over first. Doesn't make it right, but it's not like he got drunk and violent or something.
It sounds like she is an awful person to be around and he's trying to do the growing up he didn't do during the first 30 years of his life.
Yeah, a single open handed slap in that situation is not something I would do, but it is understandable and doesn't make him a monster. His wife is loving crazy though.
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Mar 26, 2017 03:36
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- Waterbed Wendy
- Jan 29, 2009
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Here's a doozy, especially the update post.
I[42F] am having issues with my SIL [44F], recently it turned very ugly, she attacked me outside church/my children's school
UPDATE: I[42F] am having issues with my SIL [44F], recently it turned very ugly, she attacked me outside church/my children's school.
Holy gently caress that poor dog! I hope that woman gets the mental therapy she sorely needs and hopefully that includes never leaving what ever facility she is thrown in. gently caress.
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Mar 26, 2017 03:45
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- inokichi
- Nov 3, 2005
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Here's a doozy, especially the update post.
I[42F] am having issues with my SIL [44F], recently it turned very ugly, she attacked me outside church/my children's school
UPDATE: I[42F] am having issues with my SIL [44F], recently it turned very ugly, she attacked me outside church/my children's school.
Where did Tim manage to find this perverse witch? How could he possibly have thought marrying her was a good idea?
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Mar 26, 2017 03:50
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- Cumslut1895
- Feb 18, 2015
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by FactsAreUseless
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Emily was incredulous that Amy could be a lesbian and look so feminine. So she would always point out men and make crude statements and even make dating profiles for her and try to set her up on dates. She once held her against the wall and kissed her and when Amy pushed her away she said "See I knew you weren't a dyke."
that's somewhere on the spectrum between sexual assault and rape
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Mar 26, 2017 03:55
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- Bubblyblubber
- Nov 17, 2014
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I wish we could get the crazy person's perspective on those stories.
Not because I'm in any way siding with the dog puncher, but because I would love to understand how a person can be this horrible, in their own words.
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Mar 26, 2017 04:48
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- Waterbed Wendy
- Jan 29, 2009
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mental unchillness
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Mar 26, 2017 04:53
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- A Wizard of Goatse
- Dec 14, 2014
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I wish we could get the crazy person's perspective on those stories.
Not because I'm in any way siding with the dog puncher, but because I would love to understand how a person can be this horrible, in their own words.
[ANGRY MONKEY NOISES]
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Mar 26, 2017 05:05
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- Pvt.Scott
- Feb 16, 2007
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What God wants, God gets, God help us all
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that's somewhere on the spectrum between sexual assault and rape
This is how porn plots play out in the real world. They usually involve crazy people and don't go anywhere.
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Mar 26, 2017 05:37
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- Darkhold
- Feb 19, 2011
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No Heart❤️
No Soul👻
No Service🙅
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I wish we could get the crazy person's perspective on those stories.
Not because I'm in any way siding with the dog puncher, but because I would love to understand how a person can be this horrible, in their own words.
The entire story from her mind is a list of why the things she did were ok because she was forced into it or didn't count or weren't exactly as they were being portrayed.
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Mar 26, 2017 08:30
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- Bubblyblubber
- Nov 17, 2014
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Other people don't really exist other than to validate my feelings or to stand in my way as a nemesis. Therefore anything I do to others is justified where anything they do to me is an outrage that must be addressed.
The entire story from her mind is a list of why the things she did were ok because she was forced into it or didn't count or weren't exactly as they were being portrayed.
That's a reasoned and insightful answer, maybe that's righ
Nah, this one's more likely.
I'm [26F] on the verge of breaking up with my boyfriend [28M] because he makes bodily noises all drat day... Am I a psycho for being annoyed my this?
quote:u/burpingfartingcoughi
This is going to sound really mean, but my [26F] boyfriend's [28M, 8 months] bodily habits are driving me insane. Some of them are not his fault, but others are the result of poor manners (like blowing his nose at the table in a restaurant instead of going to the washroom to do it).
All day he is burping, farting, picking his nose, blowing his nose, hocking a loogie, coughing, sneezing, choking on his food (he eats too quickly), spitting, or getting nose bleeds from the excessive picking/blowing. He also often has to get up mid conversation to (literally) run to the bathroom to have diarrhea. That one happens about every other day. About once a week we are 45 minutes late or more to something because he has a diarrhea attack in the car and I have to pull over somewhere with a bathroom and wait for him to poo poo.
The burping/farting/diarrhea is due to his "sensitive stomach" (ie he is probably lactose intolerant but refuses to go to a doctor about it and cheese is his favorite food), and all of the nose/throat stuff is due to his allergies and asthma, which again, have gone untreated or unmanaged. There's always some excuse: "my allergies aren't that bad, and the medication is too expensive" (we live in Canada btw) or "even if I am lactose intolerant, there's nothing I can do about it, so I'd rather not know if I am or not because I love cheese too much"
I've tried to talk to him about the ones that he can control (spitting, picking his nose, hocking loogies), but he claims that he needs to do it or else he gets extremely uncomfortable, and that we've been dating long enough that it shouldn't bother me.
It's getting kind of disruptive. I just want to have a conversation with my boyfriend without being interrupted every 60 seconds by him choking on his food because he's eating too fast or rolling down his car window to spit out of it. On some level, it also bothers me that this 28 year old man doesn't have to initiative to call the drat doctor and make and appointment about the ones that are illness-related. He grew up in a house where medication=bad, plus he has mild white coat syndrome.
Today we went out to dinner and during the hour or so we were there, there was not a 60 second period (literally, I was glancing at my wrist watch every so often) that didn't pass without him doing one of those things. I find myself just not talking at all because I know that there is a high chance he'll have to run to the bathroom at a seconds notice to avoid making GBS threads in his pants, and when he comes back he won't bother asking me to remind him where we left off.
Am I being a psycho for being annoyed with this? How can I tell him how much it's affecting me? He's really great but I don't think I can handle this for the rest of my life.
tl;dr: bf makes bodily noises all day, it's hurting our relationship and my attraction to him... what to do?!
and then my body odor smells of farts and I cum puffs of fart
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Mar 26, 2017 13:59
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- Gumbel2Gumbel
- Apr 28, 2010
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Lol that thread was definitely a classic. He was facing disciplinary action at work because of his farting, figured out he was lactose intolerant, but had a fridge full of cheese. He concluded that they couldn't fire him over a medical issue and stayed the course. It sounded like a troll until he busted out photos of the cheese.
I will never understand that. I've known two people with either celiac or some sort of FODMAP intolerance who will eat bread and poo poo their brains out because they don't want to listen to other people. It's like, there are enough OK alternatives to wheat now, just eat that you idiot.
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Mar 26, 2017 17:34
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 29, 2024 00:53
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- Bubblyblubber
- Nov 17, 2014
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Lactose intolerance story is even more "why???" since there are literally magic pills that you take before eating that'll just erase the lactose from your food. And then you can eat a whole wheel of cheese and not explode into nerve gas, why won't you take the pills? WHY???
It won't protect you from this cheese, though.
[Blowjob] I hurt his feelings when pointing out mysterious knob-cheese...
quote:u/TheInternetMightKnow
Hello,
First post on Reddit! Anyway here is the story me (20,F) and my boyfriend (20,M) have been together for a year and almost a half now and today we were fooling around and he asks for a bj. I pull back his foreskin and there's bits (i think in hindsight it was just tissue) so i must have made a face when i saw it because i really hurt his feelings with my reaction. I didn't say it was gross or anything, just asked "is that knob-cheese? Can you rinse it off?"
Without realising how hurtful I was being I then said "oh there's a towel let wipe it off" sorta-thing. By this point he was having none of it and we stopped. Then the worst part, he burst into tears after I asked him if i upset him... And he told me I embarrassed him (understandable). I honestly hadn't realised what i done. Then i thought "poo poo okay that was an overreaction on my part" to his penis fluff/bits stuff.
I feel terrible, i realise now i didn't go about it the nicest way but was my reaction bad? He went home now and i have no idea how to fix the situation? Anyone been here before, please help! I love this young man and I just don't know how to fix it. I did apologise afterward, i hope someone can help!!
TL;DR; Boyfriend has mysterious stuff under foreskin, ask him to wash, he get embarrassed, oh poo poo.
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Mar 26, 2017 17:47
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Mar 25, 2017 23:41
Tater Love 
