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GnarlyCharlie4u posted:happy wife, happy life right? This, right there folks, is the answer to life, the universe and everything (plus 42). A kitchen floor/install cabinets is now trashing a part of a wall and adding a bit more $$ to a project for that specific purpose. Whatever. We can afford it, and she is the one that spends most of the time in the kitchen preparing food, so I can't complain. She put up with my stupid PC build. I can build a more comfortable kitchen for her. Edit: and continue on the theme of the last few posts - I'm *SO* lucky to be in the financial position that I'm in. I can afford to have people do this, so I can spend time with my wife/family instead of trying to knock this out before kid #3 arrives in about a month. I'm apparently a lot more established than I thought I was, even a few months ago. We don't carry a balance on our CC, our mortgage, currently one car loan (we're about to pay off the van and get a small loan for replacing the saab, which no one likes and is too small for our needs), and some relatively low interest student loans for my wife are all our debts are. SO LUCKY. Beverly Cleavage fucked around with this message at 19:39 on Mar 29, 2017 |
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Mar 29, 2017 19:33
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The Door Frame posted:At least in America, talking about finances is rather taboo, but most people aren't nearly as financially stable as they seem It's more like learning about finances in America is taboo. I've met so many people who don't have any idea how money really works, and are just sitting on the edge of disaster at all times. Back in 08 when the economy crashed, so many people I know emptied their 401k accounts while I tried to talk them out of it. And I'm not even that great myself, I come from bad money habit stock and it's been hell to outgrow it, even at 45 years old I'm still a work in process. My dad, god bless him, spends every dime he has as soon as he gets it, and taught me to do the same. He always justifies it by calling it an investment but it often just doesn't work out and he loses money in the long run. Things like flipping cars. If he can say he technically didn't lose money then he calls it a win, and often juggles the numbers to convince himself he broke even. What's sad is that he's already burned through about 70% of the cash he got for his building when he retired and sold it. In just over one year. He has about 9 cars sitting around his house, and spent a bunch remodeling his basement to turn it into a rental property. I really hope he can get the rent he thinks he can because otherwise he won't be able to even pay his bills. And instead of paying down debt this month, I bought a home theater and a car for my daughter. NO RAGRETS.
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Mar 29, 2017 19:48
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blk posted:Thanks for the feedback everyone. Calling in suspected drunk drivers is fine. The problem here is the cops.
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Mar 29, 2017 19:56
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The average American cannot afford a $400 emergency cost and has over $50k in consumer debt
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Mar 29, 2017 21:10
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blk posted:When I was in high school I was diagnosed with ADD but shrugged it off; I've been diagnosed again as an adult (now called inattentive-type ADHD; no hyperactivity) and I'm wondering how to treat it so I can hold my grip better at work. I've previously floundered in full time jobs but have done well with part time gigs; I'm currently working full time and am banging my head against the wall by lunch. Anyone else have this going on? What worked for you? I was diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type at 29. Done reasonably well in school until my mid teens, I done no work but was bright enough to get by. Last couple of years of school being brightish was no longer enough to get by, failed everything in 5th year and scraped two C's or 3's or whatever in 6th year. Decided not to go to uni, but parents and grandparents persuaded me - got in on an HND course, upgraded to a batechlors degree, was advised not to stay on for honours - I didn't. Passed only by panicked late night sessions the day before hand in and a lack of sit down exams. Lucked into a field based technical job after uni. Ended up getting promoted into doing more and more office work, despite not being qualified. I was good at figuring new stuff out, and often got handed jobs that nobody in the company knew how to do and getting on with it and figuring it out. I always struggled with getting reports done and they were always late. Thinking a change of scene might help, I changed companies. It didn't. I ended up almost entirely office based and the only person in the company able to do my job. I coped, in the loosest sense of the word. Things constantly late, working late but not achieving anything, feeling like a shitbag and expecting to be fired. In the end I explained it all to my boss, got a diagnosis and got prescribed Ritalin. Boss was very supportive, things improved a bit, I've got good people picking up my slack now, but ended up giving up the Ritalin because it didn't seem to do poo poo, and me being me I never went back to the docs to get m script renewed. Fast forward to January of this year, once again it's Sunday night and I'm trying to finish a very late report. I know how it's going to go, I'll stay up to 2 or 3, not get anything done and feel like poo poo. I just want to be in bed with my wife. I go talk to her and we decide, seeing as her job is relatively secure for now I should quit, get a crap job, clear my head and figure out what to do next. I quit the next day. I give them the option to keep me on zero hour contract - I'll only do field work and a bit of data management - I'm not touching another goddamn word document. They take the offer, and for various reasons it's best for everybody. I've still got a bit to go but my mental health has been so much better since. Luckily I have had enough work since but I haven't really figured out my next move. Now that probably isn't much help, but here is my advice from my experience - just because you can do something, and even be very good at it doesn't mean you should be doing it if your ADHD makes reliably doing it a nightmare. Don't spend years trying to fit a round peg into a square hole because it looks like it fits - I made the mistake of spending years thinking "I can do this job and it's my only chance of a good career - I just need to knuckle down" - it made me miserable and I got nowhere. Set rules for yourself on what you are reliably capable of based on previous experience - i.e. all those times it took you two weeks more than it should have to finish a report not the one time you were on fire and done two reports in a day. One big caveat for this, drugs or cognitive behavioural therapy might help you, I never gave them much of a chance as I was already too burned out to care by the time I was diagnosed. Maybe give them a go before you try my burn your career down build a rickety shack on the ashes method. But if it really isn't working get out and figure out a more suitable job sooner rather than later. stump fucked around with this message at 21:18 on Mar 29, 2017 |
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Mar 29, 2017 21:13
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funny Star Wars parody posted:The average American cannot afford a $400 emergency cost and has over $50k in consumer debt The latter blows my mind. A friend of mine makes about $70k a year and his wife makes $55k, yet they have nearly $30,000 in credit card debt plus two cars they're making payments on and mostly live paycheck to paycheck. Granted they have three kids (two in elementary school, the third started preschool last fall) but still I don't know how they manage to blow through $130,000 anually and still need to use credit cards.
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Mar 29, 2017 21:36
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funny Star Wars parody posted:The average American cannot afford a $400 emergency cost and has over $50k in consumer debt And realtors are wondering why millenials aren't buying houses like they are supposed to be doing at this time of life.
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Mar 29, 2017 21:36
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EVERYWHERE 
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Geoj posted:The latter blows my mind. A friend of mine makes about $70k a year and his wife makes $55k, yet they have nearly $30,000 in credit card debt plus two cars they're making payments on and mostly live paycheck to paycheck. 3 kids would do that.
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Mar 29, 2017 21:46
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BigPaddy posted:I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride it where I like. *ringing bicycle bells*
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Mar 29, 2017 21:49
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funny Star Wars parody posted:The average American cannot afford a $400 emergency cost and has over $50k in consumer debt The fact that financial services industry is worth roughly a quarter to a third of the Canadian and US economies terrifies the poo poo out of me, it's gotten that big completely on the back of people spending beyond their means and at some point that's just going to collapse like housing loans did in 2008.
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Mar 29, 2017 21:51
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funny Star Wars parody posted:The average American cannot afford a $400 emergency cost and has over $50k in consumer debt I don't doubt it, most of my co-workers gross near 80k, and probably half don't have much more than $1000 cash at any time. Everybody has big shiny 4wd trucks though!
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Mar 29, 2017 21:57
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1500quidporsche posted:The fact that financial services industry is worth roughly a quarter to a third of the Canadian and US economies terrifies the poo poo out of me, it's gotten that big completely on the back of people spending beyond their means and at some point that's just going to collapse like housing loans did in 2008. It worked for houses, so let's try cars
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Mar 29, 2017 22:17
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Me and my wife had saved 6 months of expenses and then my mum died and suddenly our consumer debt was gone so all I can say is I'm extremely blessed otherwise I would be in the same boat as a lot of people Apparently only 5% of Americans have that much in savings though they which makes me feel a lot better
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Mar 29, 2017 22:51
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Do most people have savings real savings accounts? Because that feels like most people view savings as "other checking"
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Mar 29, 2017 23:10
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scuz posted:There's a weird feeling that comes over me at those points, and I expect it's the same feeling I would have if I were standing on a cliff with someone trying to push me over: I do not want to do <thing> and nothing in the world is going to make me. It's infuriating. I get that. That's definitely me, and my daughter (who is officially diagnosed with autism spectrum, near Asperger's.) If we don't want to do it, we won't, pretty much period, even if it's the easiest thing in the world. Later, I will look back and wonder why I didn't want to do that thing. My daughter is currently failing 9th grande, because she refuses to do the work, take tests, etc. Her psychologist says that we basically need to let her fail, of her own doing, to learn what it means, really. I know I can't convince her to do stuff. She just looks at me like I'm barely there, and I just get more angry. which helps nothing. My wife has to handle her. I don't know how to talk to her, largely because we're too much alike in that respect. And some of it is just "teenager". Best we can do is point her in the right direction as much as possible. I (telephone) interviewed for an IT job at a company that turned out to be one of these. The guy let out a spiel about sub-prime auto lending without any prompting from me, that sounded very defensive. I didn't know what the hell it was until I looked them up afterward (job listing did not include a business name.) g;ad I wasn't what they were looking for. I'd feel so dirty. Bad enough when my wife was an administrative assistant at a "cash store" paycheck lending business.
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Mar 29, 2017 23:25
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The Door Frame posted:Do most people have savings real savings accounts? Because that feels like most people view savings as "other checking" Most people? No, I don't think so. It's not like the banks are encouraging anything with the dismal savings rates. I have a small savings account, two IRAs from previous 401(k)s, and two 401(k)s. I need to move the 401(k) from my previous job into an IRA. It's still not enough, but may be by the time I retire - optimistically in 18 years. edit: I've got about 3K left on my student loan from 17 years ago, but my wife is about to graduate after racking up new loans. Consumer credit is OK-ish at about $4K credit cards, and a mortgage with 75K left. No car payment. Of course, I just lost my current contract, so I'm out of job unless my company finds me something else to do. It'll be a while before my wife can make use of her fancy Bachelor of Paralegal Studies. Darchangel fucked around with this message at 23:30 on Mar 29, 2017 |
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Mar 29, 2017 23:27
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The Door Frame posted:Do most people have savings real savings accounts? Because that feels like most people view savings as "other checking" i have one but i store my savings in a money market account which has a better rate than my savings account. my savings account has a special rate for the first 500 bucks you keep in it so i skim off the interest every month and never touch it.
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Mar 29, 2017 23:49
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Hey dudes. I was skimming AI and forgot how much fun these chat threads are. I might also be procrastinating on studying for an ITIL foundations cert.
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Mar 30, 2017 00:13
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stump posted:I was diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type at 29. Dang, I identify a lot with this, especially the burn-the-career down bit. If I hadn't married my wife/had a child, I would be well equipped to walk away from everything and work part time or, possibly move somewhere extremely cheap and do remote gig work. I built a lifestyle that kind of worked for me in my late 20s and early 30s where I effectively worked 10 hours/week for a cumulative 50-60k/year as a glorified computer janitor. I spent the rest of my time riding my bike, but the guilt that I was underachieving and needed a "real career", as well as pressure from my wife to start a family, compelled me to start doing the work I have now. Now my life is this stressful hellstorm of long days at the office, joyless nights at an isolated suburban home, constant fear that I'm about to be fired and doubts about my marriage that at its high point was, if not a dead bedroom, a bedroom on life support. I wish I could walk everything back and wouldn't have tried to force myself into a normality that's not compatible with who I am. I am unsure how to unfuck this. My wife and I agreed to give it a year and see how we feel; it would be so liberating if I could leave her at that point and keep enough of my savings that I still have a shot at a part-time lifestyle while still supporting my son. To make it clear, I don't blame her at all for where I am, but I'm mad at myself for thinking I could make it work. The Door Frame posted:Do most people have savings real savings accounts? Because that feels like most people view savings as "other checking" I keep cash I might need accessible in a high-yield (haha) savings account at 1.15%. I keep a small amount in checking and the most amount in a Vanguard index. blk fucked around with this message at 00:27 on Mar 30, 2017 |
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Mar 30, 2017 00:15
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The Door Frame posted:Do most people have savings real savings accounts? Because that feels like most people view savings as "other checking" I have an account with Betterment that I roll extra cash into as well as roll over old 401ks. A saving account in the classic sense is low risk but poo poo returns.
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Mar 30, 2017 00:56
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Huh. I feel a lot better about my situation after seeing that national figure. Turns out living within your means pays off! In other topics, has anyone here ever put up that insulating window film stuff? If so any brand recommendations?
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Mar 30, 2017 01:03
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You guys should try living in the present some.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:23
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I can't say I have put any of the film up myself but I have worked extensively with Eastman films and know their QC is stringent enough that I would trust them.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:34
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Adiabatic posted:You guys should try living in the present some. Living in the present, let's see... my 15 month old son died a month ago and it still feels like I stood in front of a cannon, my employment contract expires tomorrow so I will be officially unemployed, car was in an accident and still not fixed so my wife and I only have one vehicle, and I had been riding my motorcycle but the rear tire corded and the tire changer/balancer I ordered a month ago hasn't come in. Oddly enough I do have money but for all the wrong reasons. Retention bonuses and life insurance. Would give it all back in a second just to hug my kid  I'm done won't bitch again.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:41
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^Oh my. Vent if you need to, that won't be healthy to hold in and given the situation anyone would be hard pressed to call it complaining. ExplodingSims posted:Huh. I feel a lot better about my situation after seeing that national figure. Turns out living within your means pays off! I haven't because we have a cat and I figured it'd be a waste, but the 3M kit was recommended to me when I asked around. briefcasefullof fucked around with this message at 01:50 on Mar 30, 2017 |
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Mar 30, 2017 01:48
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God drat rdb. I'm sorry. That's horrible.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:50
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I'm so sorry rdb I can't even imagine.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:50
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Jesus dude I am so sorry.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:53
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Adiabatic posted:You guys should try living in the present some. I took my mom and her man out to the local microbrew place, grabbed bbq from the food truck in their lot and watched doggoes playing on the outside patio area. A good break from the grind. Still probably be better if I saved it, but gently caress it.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:53
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condolences RDB. That's loving brutal man. Can't even imagine.
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Mar 30, 2017 01:58
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Thanks, and don't try to imagine it. And don't worry about what to say because there are no words.
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Mar 30, 2017 02:01
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rdb posted:Living in the present, let's see... my 15 month old son died a month ago and it still feels like I stood in front of a cannon, my employment contract expires tomorrow so I will be officially unemployed, car was in an accident and still not fixed so my wife and I only have one vehicle, and I had been riding my motorcycle but the rear tire corded and the tire changer/balancer I ordered a month ago hasn't come in. Well....poo poo. For what it's worth, we are here for you.
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Mar 30, 2017 02:17
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ExplodingSims posted:Huh. I feel a lot better about my situation after seeing that national figure. Turns out living within your means pays off! I put up the 3m stuff every winter. I've never used any others but I can't imagine they're too different. It makes a humongous difference.
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Mar 30, 2017 02:20
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I'm so sorry, rdb. I know I can't understand, but you have my deepest sympathy.
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Mar 30, 2017 02:37
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You are right rdb, there are no words. All I can say is that I'm terribly sorry for your loss, and I for one have zero problem at all with you venting here.
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Mar 30, 2017 02:53
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Not much to say. That's bad. Do what you can.
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Mar 30, 2017 02:59
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My condolences rdb.
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Mar 30, 2017 03:21
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Cop Porn Popper posted:I took my mom and her man out to the local microbrew place, grabbed bbq from the food truck in their lot and watched doggoes playing on the outside patio area. A good break from the grind. Still probably be better if I saved it, but gently caress it. Breaks from the grind are wonderful and make me want to work even harder. Its a good way of doing things, and a great thing to spend money on. Wife and I are taking crew lessons and prepping the sailboat. Warm weather is making us start making plans. I cant wait to just be able to hike some with the girlfriend and take in some nature soon. Maybe this weekend!
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Mar 30, 2017 03:21
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rdb posted:Thanks, and don't try to imagine it. And don't worry about what to say because there are no words. Holy loving poo poo. I don't even know what I'd do in your shoes.
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Mar 30, 2017 03:52
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rdb posted:Living in the present, let's see... my 15 month old son died a month ago and it still feels like I stood in front of a cannon, my employment contract expires tomorrow so I will be officially unemployed, car was in an accident and still not fixed so my wife and I only have one vehicle, and I had been riding my motorcycle but the rear tire corded and the tire changer/balancer I ordered a month ago hasn't come in. The only thing keeping me alive is my kids I am so sorry. If you ever need anything that a goon could possibly help with let us know. Prayers for you if you believe otherwise I am wishing you all the best. I am so sorry.
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Mar 30, 2017 04:25
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