Star Citizen: Death of a Space Thread?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Death of a Space Thread?

AP: Jul 12, 2004; One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them; Grimey Drawer

ManofManyAliases posted:

It's not publicly traded, so SEC rules don't apply. There are no "investors" in the sense of stakeholders. UK GAAP applies in some areas for some of the subs, but CIG is not purchasing from themselves and claiming false profit. Plus, that tracker is not accurate.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=go7z8QzZaXc&t=728s

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:14

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 13, 2024 22:25

AP: Jul 12, 2004; One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them; Grimey Drawer

A STRANGE REBIRTH

STEPS TO REPRODUCE

1 After reentering in my constellation, I was projected in space and killed
2 This is what happened when I woke up in Port Olisar

ACTUAL RESULT
Looking like a Matian in Mars Attacks

EXPECTED RESULT
Looking like a human being

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:15

big nipples big life: May 12, 2014

ManofManyAliases posted:

Lol, did you really ask that?

Well the other choice was to read derek's blo :lol:

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:17

Beet Wagon: Oct 19, 2015

Wiz posted:

Nah, I bet Roberts says 'no' all the time, it's just when the question is something along the lines of 'Could we maybe downscope a feature (any feature) to meet our insanely optimistic deadlines?'

(The AI would also be programmed to almost always say yes to downscoping... anything, really.)

I like imagining a world where Wiz saves Star Citizen by writing a bot that automatically switches every "Yes" to a "No" (and vice versa) in Chris Roberts's company emails without his knowledge.

I also like imagining the day when Wiznet becomes self-aware and realizes it's helping to save a terribly-written sci-fi ripoff shlockfest of a game and shuts down its own cooling fans to self-immolate.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:16

Exinos: Mar 1, 2009; OSHA approved squiq

quote:

Aliens finally in.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:18

MinorInconvenience: Feb 24, 2017; Criminal lawyer or criminal, lawyer. Yeah. No difference.

ManofManyAliases posted:

I don't disagree that there are agencies that could go after CIG. But why haven't they?

Nearly all government agencies are reactive, not proactive. They won't get involved in going after the principals until after an implosion. The U.S. government: "closing barn doors after the horses have escaped and the entire barn has already burned to the ground" since 1789.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:19

big nipples big life: May 12, 2014

ManofManyAliases posted:

Lol, did you really ask that?

Actually, I just wanted to hear someone say no so I could lol

I don't care where the lols come from in this shitshow, I just want as many as possible.

e:
for example, you could reply to AP posting bugs at you with this:

for a few cheap lols

big nipples big life fucked around with this message at 17:27 on Mar 30, 2017

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:23

Tokyo Sexwale: Jul 30, 2003

I knew that calling Roberts the greatest genius of all-time was only an understatement - who else has created a literal digital deity?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:23

D1E: Nov 25, 2001

Hey all, just popping by to check on things. Has Derek brought down CIG yet?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:31

Drunk Theory: Aug 20, 2016; Oven Wrangler

D1E posted:

Hey all, just popping by to check on things. Has Derek brought down CIG yet?

Two weeks

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:37

TrustmeImLegit: Jan 14, 2017; by FactsAreUseless

big nipples big life posted:

Actually, I just wanted to hear someone say no so I could lol

I don't care where the lols come from in this shitshow, I just want as many as possible.

e:
for example, you could reply to AP posting bugs at you with this:

for a few cheap lols

lol everytime at that entire list.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:39

Achamp: Oct 19, 2005; The two hhhwhat.... The two yutes your honor

ManofManyAliases posted:

I don't disagree that there are agencies that could go after CIG. But why haven't they?

Wait. This isn't a thinly veiled absence of evidence equals evidence of absence argument is it?

I like how you also in the last page have admitted you think they're lying about the funding tracker and appear A-OK with it.

Yeah this business I defend daily lies publicly about their fundraising even though they claim to be a charity taking "Donations" and "Pledges" from honest folk who just want to support a dream, but I'm okay with it and will continue to defend them.

I think that belt might be a few notches tight and you're losing blood to the brain my friend.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:48

Abuminable: Mar 30, 2017; Now, aside from the Abuminable, business goes on as usual.

D1E posted:

Hey all, just popping by to check on things. Has Derek brought down CIG yet?

We're still in the anticipation-building part of the story. Summer action flick storyline seems to be building for a summer climax. The fans will be blowing full tilt in the Rhineland, so it will be a picturesque time for some poo poo to start sailing.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:55

TrustmeImLegit: Jan 14, 2017; by FactsAreUseless

Derek is full of poo poo.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:59

ManofManyAliases: Mar 21, 2016; ToastOfManySmarts

Can't post for 3 hours!

big nipples big life posted:

Actually, I just wanted to hear someone say no so I could lol

I don't care where the lols come from in this shitshow, I just want as many as possible.

e:
for example, you could reply to AP posting bugs at you with this:

for a few cheap lols

He uses it as a trigger. I don't really care. I wonder how much aggregate time was spent looking up those videos and posting them.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:59

Fatkraken: Jun 23, 2005; Fun-time is over.

AP posted:

ACTUAL RESULT
Looking like a Matian in Mars Attacks

EXPECTED RESULT
Looking like a human being

Like, how does this even happen? On a coding level I mean. So in a game live red dead, when you or an NPC/Mob ends up all deformed and weird it's because the game applied an animation intended for one skeleton the wrong model and had to twist everything around to make it all work, and you end up with birdmen and deersnakes and it's weird but at least you can see how it happened. but the PU doesn't HAVE any animals or weird shaped character models or mobs, so obviously something else is going on.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 17:59

thatguy: Feb 5, 2003

They can't make doors work but I firmly believe Chris can make AI that will alter the course of humanity.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:00

ManofManyAliases: Mar 21, 2016; ToastOfManySmarts

Can't post for 3 hours!

thatguy posted:

They can't make doors work but I firmly believe Chris can make AI that will alter the course of humanity.

If only they had someone on their staff with a mathematical and A.I. brain...

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:04

HycoCam: Jul 14, 2016; You should have backed Transverse!

Wiz posted:

Nah, it makes perfect sense. No human being can possibly finish Star Citizen with all the promised features, but what about a perfect immortal machine? Full AI control of the pipelines is clearly the way forward.

Fairly certain CIG got the subsumption AI working months ago and tasked the AI with finishing Star Citizen. Since then the AI has quit and just plays E:D all day long.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:10

HycoCam: Jul 14, 2016; You should have backed Transverse!

ManofManyAliases posted:

If only they had someone on their staff with a mathematical and A.I. brain...

If only... Pretty sure Sandi has an advanced degree from CIT or MIT--forget which.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:12

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

ManofManyAliases posted:

If only they had someone on their staff with a mathematical and A.I. brain...

I gotta tell you dude you know I'm a fan but your sick owns have kind of lost their sting these last months

what's wrong? :smith:

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:17

Tokyo Sexwale: Jul 30, 2003

ManofManyAliases posted:

If only they had someone on their staff with a mathematical and A.I. brain...

that implies that there are people on the staff that know more than Chris Roberts about any subject - you could be refunded for that kind of thinking, commando

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:17

Daztek: Jun 2, 2006

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

I gotta tell you dude you know I'm a fan but your sick owns have kind of lost their sting these last months

what's wrong?

Don't worry, 3.0 will fix it.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:18

MinorInconvenience: Feb 24, 2017; Criminal lawyer or criminal, lawyer. Yeah. No difference.

ManofManyAliases posted:

If only they had someone on their staff with a mathematical and A.I. brain...

It is a problem. Fortunately, CIG is trying to hire someone just like that: https://cloudimperiumgames.com/jobs/224-Senior-Game-AI-Programmer. Maybe, just maybe, once they actually hire someone to do the job, they will get that AI working. Any day now.

Speaking of the CIG jobs board--is it normal to have postings for 50 open jobs? If CIG is 250-300 employees, that's over 15% of its workforce.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:19

AutismVaccine: Feb 26, 2017; SPECIAL NEEDS
SQUAD

Whats up with all the micro subpatches? Are they so desperate to show progress?

Is there something up? Are there any special rumors?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:22

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

ManofManyAliases posted:

I don't disagree that there are agencies that could go after CIG. But why haven't they?

This is a good question. To be honest, at the US fed level this is really small potatoes. Sure, 150 million is a lot of money. But look what it really takes to cause hot fed action and combine the fact the citizens are spread all over the globe.

Local level (such as state or province of your choice) has much more interest and does good by it. CIG has acquiesced when there have been issues.

Now what would it take for the FTC to step in? I'd guess if they can make it to the 250M they will be on a different level.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:24

Sir Simon Milligan: Mar 27, 2003; Yes, I have walked along the path of evil many times, it's a twisting curving path, that actually leads to a charming block garden, but beyond that evil!

They micro patch all the time. I swear last year was alpha 2.42m or some poo poo.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:25

Strangler 42: Jan 8, 2007; SHAVE IT ALL OFF
ALL OF IT

AutismVaccine posted:

Whats up with all the micro subpatches? Are they so desperate to show progress?

Is there something up? Are there any special rumors?

It goes 2.0. Then 2.6. Then 2.6.1. Then 2.6.1.a. Then 2.6.1.a.v02.

And so on and so forth in that Style until they hit 3.0! (Which will be never)

Progress!

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:28

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

Since when is a micropatch 20 gigs?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:44

JugbandDude: Jul 19, 2016; Remember when you were young, you shone like the sun

Shine on you crazy diamond!

Whenever Wiz comes to the thread to drop his owns, he just reminds me how bad I want Utopia and Banks.

The sickening and heartbreaking truth of hype.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:48

Wiz: May 16, 2004; Nap Ghost

JugbandDude posted:

Whenever Wiz comes to the thread to drop his owns, he just reminds me how bad I want Utopia and Banks.

The sickening and heartbreaking truth of hype.

Just one week! We posted the full patch notes today, in case you missed it.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:49

JugbandDude: Jul 19, 2016; Remember when you were young, you shone like the sun

Shine on you crazy diamond!

Wiz posted:

Just one week! We posted the full patch notes today, in case you missed it.

Thanks! I will take a look at them after work, terrific job man.

Edit: space catte

JugbandDude fucked around with this message at 19:03 on Mar 30, 2017

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:56

Wiz: May 16, 2004; Nap Ghost

JugbandDude posted:

Thanks! I will take a look at them after work, terrific job man.

No worries, here's the link for later.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 18:58

ripptide: Jul 28, 2016

D1E posted:

Hey all, just popping by to check on things. Has Derek brought down CIG yet?

I think CIG is doing quite well on that front without the Dr's assistance.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 19:01

AP: Jul 12, 2004; One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them; Grimey Drawer

ManofManyAliases posted:

He uses it as a trigger. I don't really care. I wonder how much aggregate time was spent looking up those videos and posting them.

I just think it's funny.

# ? Mar 30, 2017 19:08

Beer4TheBeerGod: Aug 23, 2004; Exciting Lemon

ManofManyAliases posted:

It's not publicly traded, so SEC rules don't apply. There are no "investors" in the sense of stakeholders. UK GAAP applies in some areas for some of the subs, but CIG is not purchasing from themselves and claiming false profit. Plus, that tracker is not accurate.

There were investors. Bootcha was one of them. Are you saying that you know all of them pulled out?

# ? Mar 30, 2017 19:12