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therobit posted:Grad school is a lot different than undergrad, and she has the benefit of having seen that non traditional student in undergrad and therefore not wanting to be them. She is also studying the same field she set aside to stay at home after having kids, and has more experience in that field than kids fresh out of undergrad. But the real difference is that maybe half of her cohort are also a bit further into thier lives as well. While she does roll her eyes pretty frequently at the 22 year olds in the program, it is a more collaborative environment where hopefully people are less interested in just talking to score points in some weird generational culture war.
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Apr 3, 2017 06:54
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therobit posted:Adoption wife dude's story is sad AF but at least she is not gonna bother them anymore. A big part of it may also be him being gone all the time for years. I hadn't really realized how bad my wife was cracking up from being at home for quite a while, but at a certain point she basically said "I know you were taking classes to go back to school but I am starting grad school this summer goddamn it and you will pick up the slack with the kids." I put my classes on hold and we bought some childcare and she is in an intensive grad program and does not miss being a SAHM one little bit. Our relationship has gotten better and she is happier. Being a stay at home parent can drive some people insane. like 90% of these 'spouse went nuts out of nowhere and hosed the entire tri-county area/wants to flee to the forest and live as a wolf person' stories seem to involve a stay-at-home mom and a sole breadwinner dad who works all the goddamn time and never comes home, it's like the open relationship of initially functional human beings
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Apr 3, 2017 07:07
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Yeah I think it has to do with 40 year olds who have never had post-secondary education thinking that they have life figured out by now. They may be out of practice in terms of learning habits. Additionallt they tend to be less accepting of new ideas and theory and don't take some college instructor's word as gospel either. The latter can be positive to a point but the former gets in the way of shutting the gently caress up and learning the material. Part of the more demanding bit may also be understanding just how much loving money they are spending.
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Apr 3, 2017 07:11
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Mirthless posted:If you loved somebody enough to have a child with them
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Apr 3, 2017 10:03
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Mirthless posted:
Post-partum depression doesn't usually hit when your kids are six and three.
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Apr 3, 2017 12:12
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new phone who dis posted:I 100% agree that guy is a dick but sensitivity is a huge problem for a lot of guys with condoms and it can cause erectile issues. Just like diffrent birth control methods have variable effects on women, dudes have different responses to condoms. so glad it's the dude with the trump avatar low-key admitting to have the world's softest, most baby-like dick. idk what yr problem is i am pirapisiming 24/7 with my enormous turgid rod of sexy socialism. my hog if plum fuckin' purple, swole up so got dang ridic i can urethrally sound myself with a mother fuckin banana. i whip this beast out your wife spends the rest of her life screaming. i willllll gently caress your guns until they become electric-assist bicycle motors. i will rub my balls on your steering wheel so much your truck becomes a honda civic hybrid model w/the manual transmission. "how do hybrids even have a manual transmission?" youll cry while retching from the manly stink of my gangrenous gonads. "i can't drive a manual transmission because it will ruin my manicure, somehow."
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Apr 3, 2017 13:27
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My boyfriend [22/m] did something that disturbs me, what should I [20/f] do?quote:I've been with my boyfriend for 3 months and he told that 7 months ago he experimented with a guy and he rimmed the guy and when he did the guy kinda pooped in his mouth by accident. I'm so grossed out when I kiss him because I'm thinking about that being in his mouth. What do I do? Can't stop thinkin bout your poopmouth, babe
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Apr 3, 2017 14:22
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Buzkashi posted:My boyfriend [22/m] did something that disturbs me, what should I [20/f] do? There's precisely one reason for him to tell her that and it's because he wants her to poop in his mouth.
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Apr 3, 2017 14:28
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I never experienced the insufferable nontraditional classmate in college, and there were a lot of older students in community college and state University. Neither did my wife. On the contrary, the nontraditional students tended to be way more organized and proactive compared to their younger counterparts.
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Apr 3, 2017 14:52
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Bonster posted:Post-partum depression doesn't usually hit when your kids are six and three. lol, yeah the only problem that lady has is she's a monster. She's been in treatment for 3+ months and has never had a thought about "oh poo poo I hosed up". I admittedly don't have a ton of experience with bi-polar people but I don't think manic episodes last that long and make you incapable of love.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:01
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Cat Army
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Bonster posted:Post-partum depression doesn't usually hit when your kids are six and three. Ouhei posted:lol, yeah the only problem that lady has is she's a monster. She's been in treatment for 3+ months and has never had a thought about "oh poo poo I hosed up". I admittedly don't have a ton of experience with bi-polar people but I don't think manic episodes last that long and make you incapable of love. Post-partum depression can last years without treatment. Why are you both assuming she's been happy for the last few years? bolded statement is hosed up btw Yeah, she's a bad person, but let's not pretend bad people can't have mental health problems that contribute to them being bad people. She is a monster, who has problems that may have helped make her that way. Mirthless fucked around with this message at 15:16 on Apr 3, 2017 |
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Apr 3, 2017 15:09
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Panfilo posted:I never experienced the insufferable nontraditional classmate in college, and there were a lot of older students in community college and state University. Neither did my wife. On the contrary, the nontraditional students tended to be way more organized and proactive compared to their younger counterparts.  " throughout a semester.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:19
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Mirthless posted:Post-partum depression can last years without treatment. Why are you both assuming she's been happy for the last few years? Sorry, nothing excuses deciding to start adopting your kids away behind the other parent's back. She's a monster and terrible person.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:21
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Mirthless posted:Post-partum depression can last years without treatment. Why are you both assuming she's been happy for the last few years? This. Dealing with mental health issues alone, while trying to raise two kids, is bad enough. We don't really equip parents to deal with the negative emotions that come from having kids (e.g., resentment, sadness, regret) other than telling them they are a bad person for having them. When you mix it all together, its kind of amazing she hasn't driven her car in a lake yet. Not that I am saying anything she's been doing is acceptable or okay, its awful.....but I can sympathize with her.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:22
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Day Man posted:Sorry, nothing excuses deciding to start adopting your kids away behind the other parent's back. She's a monster and terrible person. I'm sorry, where did I excuse anything she did? "It is bad and wrong to abandon your offspring!" isn't exactly a challenging position to take and certainly not one I'm arguing against, so cram it A Wizard of Goatse posted:like 90% of these 'spouse went nuts out of nowhere and hosed the entire tri-county area/wants to flee to the forest and live as a wolf person' stories seem to involve a stay-at-home mom and a sole breadwinner dad who works all the goddamn time and never comes home, it's like the open relationship of initially functional human beings Extreme stress causes animals in the wild to abandon their offspring all the time and I imagine never seeing her husband and being stuck at home all the time took it's toll on her when her bipolar came on. Again, I am not excusing what she did, but jeeze, let this be a lesson and warning to people - don't expect your partner to do all the child-rearing while you do all the working, it never seems to end well for anyone. Mirthless fucked around with this message at 15:27 on Apr 3, 2017 |
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Apr 3, 2017 15:23
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Mirthless posted:I'm sorry, where did I excuse anything she did? You did say calling her a monster is really hosed up. I disagree with that.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:24
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I only had one non-trad classmate in my undergrad, a chubby black dude in his sixties. He was quiet for the most part and actually contributed some relevant stories to the class(Geology for Bio Sciences, he used to work with oil drilling). And then one day he came up to my roommate and asked how old he was and then launched into full reminiscence mode with "Ah yeah, I remember being 15 and stealing my older brother's ID to sneak into the whorehouses downtown. Good times, 5 bucks would last you ages back then" and everyone around was just  Kind of miss the crazy old lecher. Man [29M] I'm talking to [22F] explained why he prefers to date down and I'm not sure how to take it. Dating quote:2 points 23 comments submitted 6 months ago by squishieprincess7 to r/relationships I think it's a toss up between "depressingly common" and "I don't a want to care for a baby manchild".
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Apr 3, 2017 15:28
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Day Man posted:You did say calling her a monster is really hosed up. I disagree with that. this is what I was taking objection to: quote:the only problem that lady has is she's a monster "The only problem X has is that she's a monster" is a phrase used to describe a lot of people with postpartum depression in a lot less extreme circumstances btw A mental health problem is a problem, a crippling one, and even if it leads somebody to do horrible things it's still lovely to write it off like it's not a factor
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Apr 3, 2017 15:28
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Mirthless posted:this is what I was taking objection to: Fair enough
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Apr 3, 2017 15:36
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Kids-abandoning lady is what happens when y'all discourage the childfree movement - can we start encouraging folks who get pregnant by accident to, in fact, go through with the abortion?
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Apr 3, 2017 15:37
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imo it is reasonable to call people who get sick of their children and want to drop them off at the pound so they can go party monsters, and it is okay to call people who see a scary mask and run for hours abandoning their infant to its fate cowards, and we do not need to come up with special exemptions and euphemisms because these specific people possess brains and desires and human limitations (unlike other people, to whom those well-established English language words might apply?)Bubblyblubber posted:I only had one non-trad classmate in my undergrad, a chubby black dude in his sixties. He was quiet for the most part and actually contributed some relevant stories to the class(Geology for Bio Sciences, he used to work with oil drilling). And then one day he came up to my roommate and asked how old he was and then launched into full reminiscence mode with "Ah yeah, I remember being 15 and stealing my older brother's ID to sneak into the whorehouses downtown. Good times, 5 bucks would last you ages back then" and everyone around was just ah, the hazy summer whorehouse days of our youth IDK that guy's clearly got some delayed maturity going on but he knows what he wants and is upfront about it and it's a lot more reasonable than "I fetishize teenagers and will 100% ditch you for the newest model once your tits start to sag"; so long as he's really 29 and not like 39 he seems passably well-adjusted otherwise and she knows what his deal is, he'll probably even grow up eventually. If she's okay with him being a 24-year-old in a 29-year-old's body now he's probably not gonna start throwing weird creepy tantrums about needing to buy gifts for Valentine's day a year down the road. A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 15:57 on Apr 3, 2017 |
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Apr 3, 2017 15:40
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:Kids-abandoning lady is what happens when y'all discourage the childfree movement - can we start encouraging folks who get pregnant by accident to, in fact, go through with the abortion? Sterilize everyone. Everywhere.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:46
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Holy poo poo guys stop the presses!!! Me [31F] with my friends [30'sM&F] of 10 yrs, borrowed my car and left my trunk covered in dog hair.Denying it was them I'm tired of this motherfucking dog hair in the motherfucking trunk. Goddamn it! *Smashes trunk with lead pipe*
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Apr 3, 2017 15:47
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Just leave your babies on a high terrain feature, preferably on an unsheltered and unshaded rock exposed to the harshest local elements, bonus for being a hangout for carrion eaters. This has literally worked for thousands of years. If the gods want the kid to live, it'll live. SMDH.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:47
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:Holy poo poo guys stop the presses!!! hahahahaha what the gently caress?  How did they think this one was gonna go???
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Apr 3, 2017 15:50
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:Holy poo poo guys stop the presses!!! Lol wait a second did their friends put a dog in the trunk? Is that the accusation? Because Lol if so
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Apr 3, 2017 15:50
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Alright, I've just read the story to the full scoop, and get this: It's a hatchback, and no poo poo, some of the dog hair is on the back of the rear seats! I repeat, the back of the rear seats has been compromised.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:51
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Captain Yossarian posted:Lol wait a second did their friends put a dog in the trunk? Is that the accusation? Because Lol if so the seats fold down or it's a hatchback presumably because the hair was all over the back seats too
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Apr 3, 2017 15:51
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Bubblyblubber posted:I only had one non-trad classmate in my undergrad, a chubby black dude in his sixties. He was quiet for the most part and actually contributed some relevant stories to the class(Geology for Bio Sciences, he used to work with oil drilling). And then one day he came up to my roommate and asked how old he was and then launched into full reminiscence mode with "Ah yeah, I remember being 15 and stealing my older brother's ID to sneak into the whorehouses downtown. Good times, 5 bucks would last you ages back then" and everyone around was just this guy actually rules
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Apr 3, 2017 15:53
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Mirthless posted:Extreme stress causes animals in the wild to abandon their offspring all the time and I imagine never seeing her husband and being stuck at home all the time took it's toll on her when her bipolar came on. Again, I am not excusing what she did, but jeeze, let this be a lesson and warning to people - don't expect your partner to do all the child-rearing while you do all the working, it never seems to end well for anyone. Except she wasn't stuck at home all the time. quote:She's not at home all the time with them. They go to pre-k for six hours a day four days a week. My mom takes them pretty much every other weekend. She gets a lot of time to herself, even though it could be more, and on nights when I'm home she goes out with her friends often, and lately when I'm home she doesn't see the kids at all... It's still possible that she's overwhelmed, but she's not the isolated 'barefoot and pregnant' chained to the stove woman you're picturing here. She's a monster. I'll call her a monster with mental issues if that makes you feel better, but she's still a monster.
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Apr 3, 2017 15:57
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RE: PPD At least she didn't drown them, or drop them from the roof yet.
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Apr 3, 2017 16:02
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:Alright, I've just read the story to the full scoop, and get this: That's hosed up and I puked a bit... Dog hair in a car? poo poo
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Apr 3, 2017 16:02
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Ouhei posted:Sorry, but nothing excuses going behind her husband's back to give away their children and then her sales pitching the idea to him like it's going to be so great to get rid of their kids. After getting arrested and 3 months of treatment she apparently hasn't budged an inch on her stance, she has made it clear that she wants no part of her children's lives. I'm not saying she'd be cured in 3 months, but you'd think at some point while her whole life is falling apart and she's getting treatment she'd have a moment of self awareness about what's happening. Jesus dude, he literally bolded the part where he says he's not trying to excuse her for her behavior, and you're still going on at him as if he is. Discussing the reasons behind someone's behavior is not the same as trying to justify that behavior.
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Apr 3, 2017 16:03
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Gerblyn posted:Jesus dude, he literally bolded the part where he says he's not trying to excuse her for her behavior, and you're still going on at him as if he is. Discussing the reasons behind someone's behavior is not the same as trying to justify that behavior.
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Apr 3, 2017 16:05
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Captain Yossarian posted:That's hosed up and I puked a bit... Dog hair in a car? poo poo If ever a dog needed punching, the time is now.
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Apr 3, 2017 16:09
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I think childfree people really like to portray their life and attitude as being 100 percent different whether they have or do not have kids but I don't think it's so black and white. Of course there are plenty of people out there that never should've had kids, but in the alternate reality where they didn't have kids they are probably still lovely people in other ways. Being childfree doesn't prevent you from being horrible with money, or make it any easier to put the beta of others ahead of your own, or take on new responsibilities or deal with change. It's just that having kids suddenly gives that person a lot of excuses 'my life would've been perfect if I never had kids'.
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Apr 3, 2017 16:12
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Panfilo posted:I think childfree people really like to portray their life and attitude as being 100 percent different whether they have or do not have kids but I don't think it's so black and white. Of course there are plenty of people out there that never should've had kids, but in the alternate reality where they didn't have kids they are probably still lovely people in other ways. Being childfree doesn't prevent you from being horrible with money, or make it any easier to put the beta of others ahead of your own, or take on new responsibilities or deal with change. it's an extra fulltime+ job and a pretty wretched one if you don't really love your kids. it's entirely possible for your life to be poo poo in all kinds of ways but if you're not all in on raising a family that certainly is gonna make matters worse, for you and all the other people you've now trapped in your misery hole
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Apr 3, 2017 16:16
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Panfilo posted:I think childfree people really like to portray their life and attitude as being 100 percent different whether they have or do not have kids but I don't think it's so black and white. Of course there are plenty of people out there that never should've had kids, but in the alternate reality where they didn't have kids they are probably still lovely people in other ways. Being childfree doesn't prevent you from being horrible with money, or make it any easier to put the beta of others ahead of your own, or take on new responsibilities or deal with change.
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Apr 3, 2017 16:17
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like, it's not like being raised by parents who don't love you or much like you is a picnic either, if you aren't sure you want kids don't loving have them rear end in a top hat
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Apr 3, 2017 16:18
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I still don't understand why she agreed to have a 2nd kid. She didn't want the 1st one, and she can't have thought that a 2nd would have somehow improved her situation.
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Apr 3, 2017 16:20
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