54 40 or gently caress posted:

Lmao I love language use in posts like these

"Now and again she will send me snapchats and messages of the sexting variety. I do not really reciprocate on a graphical nature "

It's even better on legaladvice posts when OP is trying to sound like they know law terms


Do you make them sign a contract?

quote:

I've been dating my GF for 2 years now. I dated a lot before I met her but she totally revolutionized what a relationship could be like for me. We just have so much fun together it's insane. I'm really excited at the prospect of moving in together except for the food issue.

She barely keeps any food in her apartment. She literally eats the same thing for each meal every single day. I don't want to reveal what the meals are but imagine very simple things that can be prepared in bulk for the week. The problem is that she refuses to keep any other food in her place. Even fruits are just an occasional treat for a snack because she says she can't trust herself around food. She's pretty liberal when she eats socially (booze, bread, pizza, burgers, candy, whatever) but at home she has one of the most consistently empty kitchens I've ever seen. Even if I bring food over, she'll make me take the leftovers home. I'm not exaggerating.

When I ask her why she's so strict about this when she has such an amazing and fit body (which is always verging on the edge of being too skinny) she replies that "you don't stay in shape by getting comfortable with it". She also smokes a lot of weed so I know that's another reason she doesn't want to be surrounded by temptation but I would like to be able to live with her without having to lock my food up or give up eating toast and cheese and chips when I feel like it.

Please help me create a non-crazy solution that she can get on board with.

Tldr: my girlfriend and I have very incompatible eating styles and I don't know how it can work if we live together.

I Was The Fury posted:

I now tell all people I enter relationships with that I expect them to call the cops on me

I Was The Fury posted:

I [29] would like to move on with my GF [26] but I don't know how we can merge food preferences

quote:

We've been together about a year, and I have always known this about her. I mean, it's not an uncommon thing at all so it didn't bother me. But her crushes and little obsessions seem to be borderline strange now as she reveals more to me.

First it was people like cops, soldiers, doctors, professors, and lawyers. That's typical. Hell, even I think women in uniform look hot. Then, she moved onto rappers and wealthy musicians. She was obsessed with G Easy for a while. Okay- he's a good-looking guy, I admit that. Then, she moved in on TV/movie characters like Tony Soprano, Dexter Morgan. Alright.. well, they're fictional.

Some other obsessions include- real-life serial killers, mass murderers, assassins, hijackers, drug dealers, and gang members. She has also mentioned that she has fantasies about being jumped into a gang, or being kidnapped, or being held hostage.

I am not only slightly weirded out by these things, but also a bit like I can't live up to any of these things for her. I understand most of these are just wild fantasies, but it seems as though she also really wants some of these things and my overall niceness is boring to her. I just feel it sometimes. She has said she wants a relationship like the Joker and Harley Quinn. I am never going to be that guy. I told her their relationship is abusive and she insists it's not.

It's not a dealbreaker.. she is great in all other aspects of the relationship. But it's just this weird itch I can't scratch, and she can't either. What can I do about this? Just forget about it?

TLDR: My girlfriend constantly crushes on people she refers to as "men in power" who coincidentally tend to be criminals or psychopaths. I feel like I can't really live up to these sorts of fantasies, and I almost feel like she may be bored of me because of it. Is there anything I can do?

Blue Train posted:

She know she'll get fat if there's food around that actually sounds pretty smart and reasonable

I Was The Fury posted:

Girlfriend obsessed with "men in power," criminals, etc (29F and me, 32M)


but only so she'll finally love you

54 40 or gently caress posted:

Food preferences? She has an eating disorder

54 40 or gently caress posted:

Food preferences? She has an eating disorder

quote:

1,043 points 268 comments submitted 1 year ago by nopedont6767 to r/relationships
It's going to be hard to get through this without sounding like a brat or sounding like I'm jealous or just competitive or anything. I want to say up front: I am happy she beat me, I don't care that I lost to "a fat girl."

Rosa and I met when we were exiting graduate school. I have always had a crush on her, even before we dated.

I'd put her at around 5'0, 175lbs. She works out more than I do, because I'll be honest, I'm lazy and I prefer walking around more than hitting the gym. Where she might drive the car 2 miles to the store, I'll walk instead. We both cook at home, but we love food, we love to eat, and we love to drink. Our habits are not always healthy, but we are happy.

About 6 months ago, Rosa decided she'd like to lose 15lbs and enter into a 10k. She encouraged me to join the 10k with her, so I decided I would. We trained for it together and from the beginning it was obvious, since she already did a lot of cardio and things like kickboxing and all of that, she was better at this than me. As far as I know, she does elliptical, kickboxing, and sometimes running before this.

Race comes, she beats me by a bit, and we post a picture with our times online. Someone took the picture and started using it as some kind of fat activist "look fat girls run and exercise too!" thing. Rosa rolled her eyes about it, but suddenly things changed and it started to come back to me. People were laughing at me for losing to a "fat girl" and all of that. Beefy dudebros were mocking me, fit dudes, fit girls talking about how they'd be so embarassed, etc.

We've tried to ignore most of it, but the story got picked up by a local talk radio station and they wanted to talk to me and Rosa about it. We declined, more invitations came in, we declined. To use, this wasn't a huge deal because we already knew she could outdo me on a sports level.

But our families and friends are finding out and making jokes and things like that. I'm not usually one to be bothered by petty jokes and things like this, but I am really bothered by the fact that everyone is telling these jokes and they are all, whether they choose to see it this way or not, at Rosa's expense.

I don't know how to handle this.

(Side note: There is no need to jump on the omg Rosa's bmi is so high have her diet myfitnesspal omg keto train and all of that. That's 100% derailing on this post and it'll be reported and ignored. We know she's overweight. She's not going to read this post, so don't bother trying to "fix" her.)

tl;dr: Girlfriend is overweight and beat me in a 10k recently. Images of our times and everything have been circulating and people are making a fuss, making fun of both us us and everything. This includes family and friends. I'm getting fed up with it and don't know how to deal with this anymore. Any suggestions?

quote:

I live in Oregon. I am renting a room in a four bedroom apartment and the guy in the room next to me has this girl living with him. There are four of us with rooms and leases and she is also here making five.
The lease agreement says that she is not allowed to live there with him. I have been having tons of problems with them doing things like smoking pot in the apartment and leaving garbage on the patio, these are both specifically against the lease agreement. They also eat my food, make the bathroom disgusting, and make noise all night, among other things. The smoking in particular makes me very sick.
I tried to talk to them to set some ground rules. The guy obviously didn't care about what I was saying and the girl flew off the handle and started running around and slamming doors.
I am currently away for the holidays and before I left I went to the office and told them everything. They said they would post a notice that the girl had to leave. That was two weeks ago and one of the other roommates texted me that she was still there.
The two of us are planning to go to the office again, but how should we go about it? What can we do in the meantime? Can or will the management even do anything?
Any advice would be appreciated.
tl;dr: I am renting a single room in a 4 bedroom apartment. One of my roommates has his girlfriend living with him and she is not supposed to be there. The rest of use want her gone because she is violent and gross.
Edit: We all have separate leases and pay separately.

quote:

So my other roommate contacted me today and said that the guy and his unwelcome "guest" got a dog. The apartment charges a pretty big fee for pets and also requires consent from roommates so I am certain they do not have permission. My other roommate confronted them and they freaked out, called him a sexist rear end in a top hat, and put a hole in his door. They also said they will be there until next December when they told me they would be leaving in February.
I told him if they were being violent that he should call the cops, but he didn't because its Christmas.
So I wrote an email to the office asking for them to take some sort of immediate action to resolve the situation, preferably to evict them. Since its Christmas and the office won't be open until Monday I don't know how long it will take, but my roommate plans to go into the office as soon as they open and I intend to call them and explain the situation.
I'm still away for the holidays, but I don't really feel safe going back to this mess. Hopefully it gets resolved quickly...
tl;dr: Bad roommates got a dog without permission and got into a violent confrontation with other roommate.

Barudak posted:

I went to school with G Easy and had to work with him for a class and I feel confident in saying if your significant other wants to bang him you should sever.

Xombie posted:

It's likely she has a binge eating disorder, which is why she doesn't keep extra food around.

Fullhouse posted:

eating an extremely limited selection of food for any reason is an actual eating disorder. one of the weird ones nobody talks about. it's called pica or something

and if this girl literally only eats, I imagine, 10 gallon pots of broccoli rice, I think she qualifies

Fullhouse posted:

eating an extremely limited selection of food for any reason is an actual eating disorder. one of the weird ones nobody talks about. it's called pica or something

and if this girl literally only eats, I imagine, 10 gallon pots of broccoli rice, I think she qualifies

54 40 or gently caress posted:

Lmao I love language use in posts like these

"Now and again she will send me snapchats and messages of the sexting variety. I do not really reciprocate on a graphical nature "

It's even better on legaladvice posts when OP is trying to sound like they know law terms

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

pretty good when goons try to e-diagnose people using words they heard from House MD too

Xombie posted:

It's likely she has a binge eating disorder, which is why she doesn't keep extra food around.

Improbable Lobster posted:

Bubblyblubber posted:

the beefiest, bitch

My (28m) overweight gf (27f) of 4 years beat me in a local 10k, people are trying to humiliate me over it. Relationships


Not cool, beefy dudebros. Not. Cool.

Fullhouse posted:

eating an extremely limited selection of food for any reason is an actual eating disorder. one of the weird ones nobody talks about. it's called pica or something

quote:

and if this girl literally only eats, I imagine, 10 gallon pots of broccoli rice, I think she qualifies

Pick posted:

Pica is eating one weird thing compulsively but doesn't discount eating normally outside of that thing.

She has restrictive eating disorder, I think it's called. Or it might be a symptom of orthorexia depending on what these things are.

ravenkult posted:

tell me more

Xombie posted:

Her eating that only exists in your imagination, though. It's actually a thing that you just imagined and said.

quote:

She literally eats the same thing for each meal every single day. I don't want to reveal what the meals are but imagine very simple things that can be prepared in bulk for the week

quote:

u/mollywhoop
My girlfriend's sister was addicted to heroin. She was kicked out of her mother's house and needed a place to stay. We were going to let her stay with us, but I made it very clear there would be no drugs in my house. Both my girlfriend and her sister agreed with this stipulation.

The first day she moved in, she said she needed to pick up some things from her mom's house and left. She never came back. They found her dead in a public bathroom, needle still in her arm. My girlfriend was completely devastated. I have tried to comfort her, but she lashes out at me. She says it's my fault her sister is dead because I wouldn't allow her to use in my house. She says she could have saved her if she overdosed here.

I know she is upset and in hurting, I try to cut her as much slack as I can, but it's been a week. What can I do?

TLDR Girlfriend's sister was moving in with us, I told her no heroin in the house. She overdosed in a public restroom. Girlfriend blames me because if she had been allowed to use in the house, she thinks she could have saved her.

Xombie posted:

The dude was saying that she does meal prep. That's not an eating disorder. Also, That's not what pica is.


Her eating that only exists in your imagination, though. It's actually a thing that you just imagined and said.


Simply not keeping snacks around doesn't qualify her for either of those either.

Fullhouse posted:

it's an example thing because he wouldn't specify. eating the same thing every day for every meal definitely ain't right

quote:

u/tenthofnovember
I've been with my guy for over a year now, and even though we spent so much time together, seem to have a great relationship/sex life, have travelled together and know each others families, he has time and time again refused to commit. I've brought up exclusivity and giving our relationship a more serious label sooo many times, but each time he either wants to drop the subject, or says he "wants to keep his options open." This makes me feel disrespected and I try to end our non-relationship relationship, but end up crying and telling him I'll stay because I'll convince myself it's going well without a label, so who needs one...

However, I mentioned it the other day again and broke down when he became angry that I brought it up. I expressed that I felt like I put a lot more effort into our "relationship" than he does. He ended up saying he doesn't want to commit right now and dating other people while he is "with me" is something he wants to keep as an option. Once again, I tried breaking up, but was too upset to do it, and we ended up dropping the issue.

But this problem in our "relationship" has been way too stressful on me lately. I don't want to keep it going any longer, because I know I'll just get more attached while he probably gets less so, and keep putting in more effort, which will lead to heavier heartbreak and regret when it ends. However, I can't seem to end it in person/over the phone as I've tried. What I really want to do is just ghost on him. I want to delete his contact information, block his number, delete and block him on all social media, etc. I just want to cut my losses. I haven't seen him since Saturday, so I feel like right now is my perfect opportunity. As much as I want answers as to why he doesn't feel like he can commit to me (when we are already basically a couple) I know he won't ever provide them.

So is my plan of ghosting a good idea? Is there a chance it will backfire? Is there a better, easier way for me to break up with him? I'm at the point where I feel used and strung along, yet I can't seem to get myself away from this man who doesn't feel the same way about me.

tl;dr: Been seeing a guy for over a year but he refuses to enter a serious relationship/give us a label. I want to break up with him, but whenever I've tried in person/over the phone I just get upset and take it back. I think ghosting (deleting/blocking him everywhere) and cutting my losses could be a good option. Is it?

Milotic posted:

My girlfriend [24F] blames me [29M] for her sister's [20F] death


Well that relationship is over.

Milotic posted:

Well that relationship is over...

Barudak posted:

dosed

Pick posted:

Pica is eating one weird thing compulsively but doesn't discount eating normally outside of that thing.

She has restrictive eating disorder, I think it's called. Or it might be a symptom of orthorexia depending on what these things are.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

pretty good when goons try to e-diagnose people using terms they picked up from House MD too

Pick posted:

I did that for a while in grad school, in part due to cost, so 2 meals a day would be oat bran with skim milk.

Barudak posted:

dosed

Xombie posted:

Simply not keeping snacks around doesn't qualify her for either of those either.

fruit on the bottom posted:

Biopsy the stomach. When the tests come back negative, start her on a broad range spectrum of antibiotics. If we're right she'll be fine by breakfast and if we're not, the new symptoms should tell us where the infection is hiding.

Also God is dead, love is a lie, and compassion is for suckers. See you next season, folks!

(Currently watching House all the way through. There has been maybe one episode without the above exchange)

boner confessor posted:

it sounds more like an unhealthy coping mechanism for an eating disorder. like, it's good to find ways to curb your eating habit, but it's not good to keep zero food in your house because you can't trust yourself around food. this is going to cause interpersonal problems