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Stoatbringer posted:I want to see the pie chart. That wasn't the only chart he had. He also logged when he or I went to bed, how many drinks we had, conversations we had...everything was logged. He would always be like "do you want to know how many beers you had this past month" and it pissed me off because no I do not want to know something like that, stop logging everything I do.
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Apr 8, 2017 16:38
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If he was just keeping a chart of his jerk offs for his girlfriend and not breaking it off he had to be either a dormat or it got him really hard. But if he is keeping a chart of everything else, that is A. loving Hilarious B. Really weird C. Autism D. All of the above
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Apr 8, 2017 16:44
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yeah I eat rear end posted:That wasn't the only chart he had. He also logged when he or I went to bed, how many drinks we had, conversations we had...everything was logged. He would always be like "do you want to know how many beers you had this past month" and it pissed me off because no I do not want to know something like that, stop logging everything I do. So you basically lived with Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory? Tell me he became an accountant or an actuary or statistician.
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Apr 8, 2017 17:44
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Solice Kirsk posted:So you basically lived with Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory? Tell me he became an accountant or an actuary or statistician. He's currently making like 8 times what I do as a banking executive despite spending 5 years less in college than I did.
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Apr 8, 2017 17:52
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Isn't there some kind of grognard's philosophy that involves carefully tracking details like this? I mean on one hand it isn't that different than people carefully tracking their diet/exercise. The whole idea is that by tracking mundane things you can pick up patterns you might not normally be aware of. Plus if there was any dispute over who takes out the trash more, who leaves the fridge open longer, etc that guy's got a Trump card for it every time.
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Apr 8, 2017 18:07
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incel goon should keep having his new stepmum walk in on him having a wank imo and see how she reacts
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Apr 8, 2017 18:14
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Feel sorry for that stepmom. She can see him creeping on her and is dreading the moment he tries something.
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Apr 8, 2017 18:40
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Stepmom would rather see other goon self-fellate.
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Apr 8, 2017 19:28
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wrestling really is a major thread fixturequote:My brother owns and operates a small, regional wrestling fed. Nobody who would ever get picked up by WWE, but he makes a decent living with it, pays his wrestlers well, and even is able to donate money to the local children's hospital. I think there was a Rick & Morty episode like this, where the parents' warped exaggerated versions of each other came to life as part of a couples therapy strategy that backfired spectacularly quote:I have several beautiful replica swords hanging in my bedroom. I dunno, for the swords to repel women you have to have women in your bedroom sometimes
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Apr 8, 2017 23:50
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What kinds of swords? And, uh, how much you want for 'em?
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Apr 9, 2017 00:03
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loquacius posted:
one has a +1 to vaginal dryness enchant
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Apr 9, 2017 00:03
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Ive literally had that wrestling character thought about my wife and caricatures of her that way in a fantasy setting like wwe. Totally believable. Hell everyone at some point could probably relate.
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Apr 9, 2017 01:42
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Lol at the soldier of misforture that only managed to rise to the level of "mule."
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Apr 9, 2017 02:13
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loquacius posted:wrestling really is a major thread fixture Why not just take her to a match that doesn't involve that character?
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Apr 9, 2017 02:45
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GIANT OUIJA BOARD posted:Why not just take her to a match that doesn't involve that character? Unless the wrestler name is connected to the wife's name she probably wouldn't connect it to herself. Most people don't think of themselves as annoying assholes.
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Apr 9, 2017 03:02
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Wait wait wait Wrestling is written??
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Apr 9, 2017 03:07
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Hedrigall posted:Wait wait wait Don't let these miscreants lead you astray. Wrestling will always be real if you believe it in your heart.
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Apr 9, 2017 04:19
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Hedrigall posted:Wait wait wait I used to know a woman wrestler / aspiring actress / stripper. She was probably not a very good fighter (I never saw her fight) but she was hot and dumb and could probably memorize a script well enough to be entertaining.
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Apr 9, 2017 05:25
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Hedrigall posted:Wait wait wait It's still real to me, drat it.
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Apr 9, 2017 08:24
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quote:I'm a survivalist and have been prepping for World War 3 for the last 4 years. Now that Trump played his cards and revealed he's controlled by the Globalists, I think it's finally going to happen. So here's my confession; I withdrew my 401(k) and used that money (about 90k) to build an Iron Man-esque suit to survive the apocalypse. Everybody said I was stupid but I'm finally being proven correct. If an Iron Man suit only cost $90k I think the military would be using it exclusively by now. For comparison, each of those 50 missiles Trump just launched at that empty airbase because he wanted to distract from the Russia investigation cost a cool $1.5 mil. But I'm glad you're enjoying your hobbies! quote:I used to frequent a real piece of poo poo bar. Bathrooms smelled like chlorine, floors were sticky, and they'd usually have to call the cops once every few weeks. I guess what you'd call a nuisance bar. You have an oddly precise memory for the precise order of which wrestling moves were used in a barfight, but I really like this mental image
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Apr 9, 2017 13:18
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He dick kick the poo poo out of Andy dick at a bar once
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Apr 9, 2017 13:37
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Jose posted:He dick kick the poo poo out of Andy dick at a bar once This is what I came to post. For whatever reason, the image of Jay Sherman smashing Andy Dick's face into a bar while shouting, "IT STINKS!" again and again is truly endearing.
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Apr 9, 2017 13:38
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The bathrooms smelled of Chlorine?? My goodness!
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Apr 9, 2017 13:55
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Lemon posted:The bathrooms smelled of Chlorine?? My goodness! He meant chlorine gas. It was one of those real dive bars where there's just a fog of mustard gas throughout the whole place.
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Apr 9, 2017 14:13
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I'm no survivalist supergenius but surelyquote:My suit is lead-lined. Obvious - prevents radioactive fallout. and quote:if I need to go underwater to scavenge for supplies. are not a good combination?
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Apr 9, 2017 14:18
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I guess the fact that he has no idea what he's talking about doesn't make it fake considering he's a doomsday "prepper", but I think the amount of lead needed to properly shield you from fallout radiation would make it impossible to move around in. Just having a millimeter of lead around you or something isn't going to do much at all.
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Apr 9, 2017 14:30
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The principal component of the iron man suit is that it's powered and gives you super human strength. If you just built a lead-lined suit of armor that weighs you down as you're being attacked by marauding "dark" people then you may as well just build a coffin for yourself. On the other hand I would totally see this movie where Jon Lovitz, old fat and queeny, wrestles a few rednecks at a dive bar, drops some bills on the table and says "yeah, that's the ticket" before walking out
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Apr 9, 2017 14:52
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i dont know why these tinfoil hat people are so scared of Saria Law like all she did was give you an ocarina and say goodbye
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Apr 9, 2017 14:59
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WWiPiks1sU hell, have some more: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcBmUrV1oWo Solice Kirsk fucked around with this message at 15:19 on Apr 9, 2017 |
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Apr 9, 2017 15:16
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I don't care how fake it is, it is in my personal canon now that Jon Lovitz is actually a complete badass.
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Apr 9, 2017 16:32
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Me too, I would have payed good money to see that. fake or not.
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Apr 9, 2017 16:56
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your suit is not bulletproof your flamethrower is gonna run out of fuel on day one the lead will not protect you from radiation if you go underwater you will suffer an agonizing death you will never need a sword or axe unless you are facing literal hordes of um "dark" marauders in which case you are an idiot and run out of bullets like a sap in which case aforementioned hordes i'm gay will surround you and your leet kendo skillz will be worth bupkis there is literally not a single even passingly plausible scenario that would result in an islamist takeover of north america and you're gonna starve once you run out of dog food because despite having skimmed duck dynasty's official hunting handbook you are still a retard of ineffable stupidity who will die of diarrhea thanks bye god bless
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Apr 9, 2017 18:10
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I want to see iron man suit guy run a while wearing it. Actually maybe run a mile in general because usually preppers forget the most important part which is being in shape.
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Apr 9, 2017 19:31
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The best part about preppers is that they can never shut up about their fully stocked bunker they spent their lifes savings on. If on the off chance you'd actually need a bunker like that, you don't need to prepare, just camp at the entrance to the bunker your buddy kept bragging about for years and knock him off the first time he pokes his head out and you're set.
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Apr 9, 2017 20:03
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I wouldn't even really want to live in a post-apocalypse, you know? If we're going to have an apocalypse that means somebody has to die and I am proud to volunteer.
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Apr 9, 2017 20:14
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Enola Gay-For-Pay posted:I wouldn't even really want to live in a post-apocalypse, you know? If we're going to have an apocalypse that means somebody has to die and I am proud to volunteer. It's all a huge power fantasy. Now you're just a loser in a dead end life but when the apocalypse happens you will be the one with the guns, food, and shelter and you will be the winner. You'll show all of those idiots.
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Apr 9, 2017 20:58
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Don't post confessions like that if they don't include a picture imo
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Apr 9, 2017 21:12
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I want to believe Indy Fiance. Back before we met my wife went out on a date with a dude who spent the whole night whining about how his last girlfriend dumped his rear end for cosplaying Indiana Jones when they went out.
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Apr 9, 2017 22:02
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The Management posted:It's all a huge power fantasy. Now you're just a loser in a dead end life but when the apocalypse happens you will be the one with the guns, food, and shelter and you will be the winner. You'll show all of those idiots. I always figured it was some sort of mental illness, but this makes a ton of sense too. I feel like my apocalyptic fantasy is way smaller than theirs because the only thing I'm looking forward to if I live is being able to drive around in a Maserati GranTurismo..........I'd want it in blue.
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Apr 9, 2017 22:07
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They all want to be Immortan Joe, rocking the cool car, the army of toadies, and all the boob juice you can drink.
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Apr 10, 2017 00:12
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