NBA Playoffs 2016-17 G/V: The Playoffs Are A Band Metaphor Now

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > NBA Playoffs 2016-17 G/V: The Playoffs Are A Band Metaphor Now

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EvanTH: Apr 24, 2004; i like to express my inner pain by being really boring on the phone
or just when i'm kickin it
that's me though
i'm kind of oddddddd

Ugh thinking about you moreyhead jim-voting math addicts doing your math alone in your mathrooms a fiend glow in your eyes all "the triple double is arbitrary therefore unimportant" pretending like messing around has no cultural significance, as if we would even care for sports if it was just an efficiency balancing problem with no style no flair no emotional hook
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4UqMyldS7Q

Westbrook for MVP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSUTeiTik4Y
LeBron for upcoming playoffs MVP I can't wait to watch that dude play basketball ha ha ha

# ? Apr 14, 2017 02:44

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# ? May 15, 2024 04:04

Space Camp fuckup: Aug 2, 2003

Dejan Bimble posted:

Nobody's telling me about their Musecage and it's starting to piss me off

My musecage is the patio of the neighborhood bar where I can drink beer and smoke cigarettes and think about how Alan Williams will be a superstar one day

# ? Apr 14, 2017 02:50

Lockback: Sep 3, 2006; All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.

euphronius posted:

The Sixers plus minus with Embiid on the court in January was like +18 . Which is better than the warriors

My point is even of you divide his production by 3 he's still better than . .. Michael ? Brogdan

That's, like, criminally cherry picking a stat and comparing it to something else entirely. Embiid's BPM was +3 per 100 possessions this season. +/- is pretty flawed, but it really doesn't help make a case for Embiid.

I mean, I agree if he played all season he'd likely be the run away ROTY, but isn't voting for him based on "what have beens" doing the same narrative-chasing vote we make fun of?

# ? Apr 14, 2017 02:53

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

Lockback posted:

That's, like, criminally cherry picking a stat and comparing it to something else entirely. Embiid's BPM was +3 per 100 possessions this season. +/- is pretty flawed, but it really doesn't help make a case for Embiid.

I mean, I agree if he played all season he'd likely be the run away ROTY, but isn't voting for him based on "what have beens" doing the same narrative-chasing vote we make fun of?

I didn't choose the stat ! Don't argue with me.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 02:54

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

If he played that well all year he'd be first team all NBA . Maybe second team.

That's the point . Oh no one cares I'm a dumb homer and he won't win.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 02:55

Nissin Cup Nudist: Sep 3, 2011; Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land

How the hell dies Brogdan have such a massive lead in win shares scoring 10 points a game?

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:11

leftist heap: Feb 28, 2013; Fun Shoe

My votes:

MVP: Russ - Dunks Rule Everything Around Me
DPOY: gently caress Defense
6MOY: My man Enes "Feathery Touch" Kanter for his Copious Buckets
MIP: Giannis
ROY: Buddy Hield for Attempting Copious Buckets. Runner up to Malcolm "I still think he's Austrlian" Brogon

Dont fuckin @ me

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:11

Lockback: Sep 3, 2006; All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.

euphronius posted:

If he played that well all year he'd be first team all NBA . Maybe second team.

That's the point . Oh no one cares I'm a dumb homer and he won't win.

He had worse stats than KAT while KAT was playing more minutes and I don't know if KAT is going to make it so....

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:12

Cool Buff Man: Jul 30, 2006; bitch

Nissin Cup Nudist posted:

How the hell dies Brogdan have such a massive lead in win shares scoring 10 points a game?

I mean, look up the definition / formula of win shares. He's played a lot more and racked up a lot of assists and shoots well from 3.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:14

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

Nissin Cup Nudist posted:

How the hell dies Brogdan have such a massive lead in win shares scoring 10 points a game?

Embiid had a ton of turnovers

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:15

Lockback: Sep 3, 2006; All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.

Nissin Cup Nudist posted:

How the hell dies Brogdan have such a massive lead in win shares scoring 10 points a game?

The team he was on was much better. Defensive winshare in particular take that into account. Brogdan also gets assists and doesn't turn the ball over, which really helps your ORTG in general, and it helped by the fact that his team was better than the 76ers or the messes Buddy Hield wandered around in.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:16

Tae: Oct 24, 2010; Hello? Can you hear me? ...Perhaps if I shout? AAAAAAAAAH!

Lockback posted:

He had worse stats than KAT while KAT was playing more minutes and I don't know if KAT is going to make it so....

Unfortunately, I think the only way KAT has a chance is if the voters still think Anthony Davis is a PF and not a C when he's basically been the Pelicans C for at least half the season.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:18

EvanTH: Apr 24, 2004; i like to express my inner pain by being really boring on the phone
or just when i'm kickin it
that's me though
i'm kind of oddddddd

euphronius posted:

If he played that well all year he'd be first team all NBA . Maybe second team.

That's the point . Oh no one cares I'm a dumb homer and he won't win.

Haha c'mon that's no way to win an argument about who should win World's Favorite Player (BECAUSE HE'S THE BEST! NOT BECAUSE I LIKE HIM SO MUCH AND WANT TO KISS HIM AND MARRY HIM) Award

you gotta stay aggressive and on the attack. Never pause for self-reflection or anything just full post ahead

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:32

NickRoweFillea: Sep 27, 2012; doin thangs

Dejan Bimble posted:

Let's break it down to known knowns and known unknowns and unknown unknowns

Kobe states plainly that a Musecage is a room decorated with anything and everything that inspires you. A reel to reel tape and possibly a Quran pop up as he says this.

Kobe goes on to state, while surrounded by the words "ambitions, Frien^s, Ambitions, Challenges, Recognitions, Awards, "When you are in your musecage your surrounding by musings that keep you focused and motivated."

Then his purple worm friend asks (I think) "Can a musecage cause me to be a beast for my basketball game?" Kobe answers in the affirmative. The worm asks "Can a musecage muse me to be a beast like James Harden? Kobe again answers yes.

Kobe states a musecage can be whatever you want to be, if you build it the right way. He states you don't need construction tools, but you need your curiosity, to search all of the world for musings to use to decorate your musecage. the more musings you find, the more powerful your musecage will become.

This is when it gets heavier and into a distorted version of ego psychology
Kobe says a Musecage is defined by light musings, like 'youre nice" and dark musings, like "you're worthless"

Kobe states that dark musings may be our greatest source of energy and power. and that your inner beast may be inside a dark muse.

This is followed by an animated vignette in black and red about a train trekking through dangerous mountains in search of a dark muse for his musecage.

In the next video, the worm is speaking about destruction and domination. Kobe tells him he needs to learn the game at a higher level, and reveals an all knowing crystal polyhedron. The worm wishes for the secrets of Harden and Westbrook.

A female narrator (voice of crystal polyhedron) says that their numbers are inspirational, but a musecage is not complete until we understand how they get these numbers.We're instructed to gameplan against both and the female narrator explains how to cover actions by both Harden and Westbrook in multiple ways. Then she poses the question, are Harden and Westbrook reading the game, or doing something more (ambiguous) then she instructs us to muse on.

Known unknowns: Is the musecage a physical room where you watch game film or a state of mind where games are remembered in full and dissected and replayed in various ways

Unknown Unknowns: Does the word cage represent the prison that focusing on one task above all others that self-erects when humanity is shunted aside for angry basketball excellence

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:34

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

I've been neutered by introspection and respect for others :negative:

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:35

Stevie Lee: Oct 8, 2007

Embiid is the rookie of the year for this play alone:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5S3Kx4wYnL0

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:39

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

Stevie Lee posted:

Embiid is the rookie of the year for this play alone:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5S3Kx4wYnL0

He was playing with a torn mensicis here

That Houston game was bonkers

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:41

Punkin Spunkin: Jan 1, 2010

Spacebump posted:

Bad news for the Grizz. https://twitter.com/stevekylerNBA/status/852636005798731779

Uh oh...where are we gonna hide tony Parker now?!
Hopefully on the bench

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:51

El Gallinero Gros: Mar 17, 2010

euphronius posted:

Voting for brogdan is drat shameful.

If Embiid had played like 60 games he'd be my pick. But I can't vote for a guy who missed 60% of the season.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:54

Doltos: Dec 28, 2005; 🤌🤌🤌

Tae posted:

Unfortunately, I think the only way KAT has a chance is if the voters still think Anthony Davis is a PF and not a C when he's basically been the Pelicans C for at least half the season.

Positions are dumb and don't really exist and I wish they'd just have front court and back court as the voting options.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 03:59

Ramadu: Aug 25, 2004; 2015 NFL MVP

if westGOAT doesn't win the MVP imma be real cheesed off

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:07

Ammanas: Jul 17, 2005; Voltes V: "Laser swooooooooord!"

Doltos posted:

Positions are dumb and don't really exist and I wish they'd just have front court and back court as the voting options.

Should vote by BMI categories

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:14

Punkin Spunkin: Jan 1, 2010

Can Tony Allen's backup shoot? This is an important question

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:15

Rick: Feb 23, 2004; When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.

I don't care a lot about MVP but I do think your children will be confused as to why you didn't vote for Russ since it's what this season will be remembered for.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:25

Tae: Oct 24, 2010; Hello? Can you hear me? ...Perhaps if I shout? AAAAAAAAAH!

News is coming out that Jamal Murray has been playing with a sports hernia since the season started

That uh....wow

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:28

Lockback: Sep 3, 2006; All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.

Doltos posted:

Positions are dumb and don't really exist and I wish they'd just have front court and back court as the voting options.

Voters can put whoever they want to each position though. It should just be top-5 best players though, it's not like the All-NBA team suits and and plays.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:35

The Glumslinger: Sep 24, 2008; Coach Nagy, you want me to throw to WHAT side of the field?; Hair Elf

Tae posted:

News is coming out that Jamal Murray has been playing with a sports hernia since the season started

That uh....wow

Probably should have just gotten surgery on it

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:47

Lessail: Apr 1, 2011; tell me how vgk aren't playing like shit again

p.s. help my grapes are so sour!

Ramadu posted:

if westGOAT doesn't win the MVP imma be real cheesed off

it'll just prove all of the voters are in the pocket of big golden state

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:53

Brolander: Oct 20, 2008; i am but a vessel

chunkles posted:

Mike Conley has never received a technical, ever

https://www.wsj.com/articles/mike-conley-the-nba-player-who-is-technically-perfect-1492090233

who was the previous even headed champ...Vern fleming?

E: haha yep it's good old vern. i knew a kid whose dad would encourage him to pretend to be him, due to the chillness and good sportedness

# ? Apr 14, 2017 04:58

DeimosRising: Oct 17, 2005; �Hola SEA!

Dexo posted:

Fred Hoiberg for COY. He coached this garbage fire of a roster to the playoffs something that alleged COY candidate Spo couldn't do.

I think it's a testament to the value of a superstar. Butler is head and shoulders the best player on the Bulls and Heat roster, but the next like, 4 or 5 players are arguably on the Heat. And yet here we are

Lockback posted:

MVP: Kawhi Leonard
Harden
Westbrook
Lebron
IT

DPOY: Gobert
Draymond
DeAndre Jordan

ROY: Saric
Brogdan
Hield

MIP: Giannis
Jokic
Westbrook

COY: D'Antoni
Popovich
Spo

I think I agree except Harden for MVP. I think there's another guy in the league who can step into everyone else's shoes and be about as good or better (Lebron for Westbrook, Paul George for Kawhi, etc) but Harden is very specifically the only guy who can do what he did for that team this year. Maaaaaybe Steph Curry, but the last time his supporting cast was that weak he was just a borderline all star (and also was in his 3rd year in the league, so who knows).

Go back in time to August and tell someone that not only will the Rockets be the 3 seed and third overall in the NBA, but in late february/early march it will be conceivable they'll finish first overall. They'll shoot you for being some kind of trickster terminator. D'Antoni won 55 with a roster that is basically the 2016 Pelicans with Harden subbed in for Davis, absurd.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:22

Tae: Oct 24, 2010; Hello? Can you hear me? ...Perhaps if I shout? AAAAAAAAAH!

DeimosRising posted:

D'Antoni won 55 with a roster that is basically the 2016 Pelicans with Harden subbed in for Davis, absurd.

Eh, that's really underrating Trevor Ariza. He's secretly the glue that keeps the defensive side from completely falling apart while still hitting at an honest rate. And the Rockets with a similar starting core was 2nd in the West a couple years ago at an elite defensive level.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:26

Boredumb: Mar 10, 2005

Dejan Bimble posted:

Can we talk about our personal Musecages?

My Muse Cage is the whole foods in Glendale where everyone is the same height and build as me because it's disconcerting when I go shopping in little aremenia and there are dozens of 5'0 grown adult men toddling around

Little Armenia is in Hollywood, Glendale is just full of Armenians.

My Muse Cage:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=516H67I5O7o

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:36

Noctone: Oct 25, 2005; XO til we overdose..

I'm a little disturbed by all the Kawhi for MVP chatter itt going completely unchecked. He shouldn't even be top 3.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:38

Zogo: Jul 29, 2003

chunkles posted:

Mike Conley has never received a technical, ever

https://www.wsj.com/articles/mike-conley-the-nba-player-who-is-technically-perfect-1492090233

Em Vee Pee.

euphronius posted:

You don't vote for a role player for Roy because a superstar rookie only played 31 games

That's the dumbest poo poo ever. Embiids 31 game production stretched over 82 games is still better than brogdan . He was the best rookie this year ! By far ! He almost made the all star team ffs

I think only rookies with 10+ WS should get the hardware.

code:

Player		 Season		Age	Tm	WS
Chris Paul	 2005-06	20	NOK	10.4
Tim Duncan	 1997-98	21	SAS	12.8
Shaquille O'Neal 1992-93	20	ORL	10.4
David Robinson	 1989-90	24	SAS	15.1
Michael Jordan	 1984-85	21	CHI	14
Hakeem Olajuwon	 1984-85	22	HOU	10.2
Larry Bird	 1979-80	23	BOS	11.2
Magic Johnson	 1979-80	20	LAL	10.5

What a beautiful list. :discourse:

All other rookies can get a pie in the face.

Jack's Flow posted:

List of all the NBA records broken during the regular season:

http://www.sbnation.com/nba/2017/4/13/15257526/nba-records-broken-new-2016-17-westbrook

Still disappointing that Love scored 34 in the first quarter and finished with 40.

"First player to finish in the top three of offensive and defensive rating: Rudy Gobert

Gobert ended his amazing Jazz season with the best offensive rating and the second-best defensive rating. Amazing."

In 1980 Tree Rollins finished #1 in DRtg and #2 in ORtg.

SBNation just lied to all of us.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:42

Tae: Oct 24, 2010; Hello? Can you hear me? ...Perhaps if I shout? AAAAAAAAAH!

76ers super homer trying to argue embiid is roty based on a popularity contest

76ers super homer says embiid is zaza pachulia

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:44

Boredumb: Mar 10, 2005

Noctone posted:

I'm a little disturbed by all the Kawhi for MVP chatter itt going completely unchecked. He shouldn't even be top 3.

Everyone arguing about mvp = Heat
Kawhi = Kawhi

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:45

Shear Modulus: Jun 9, 2010

the musecage sounds like a place i end up at when my anxiety gets really bad

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:48

Zogo: Jul 29, 2003

Doltos posted:

Positions are dumb and don't really exist and I wish they'd just have front court and back court as the voting options.

Why do front/back? How about just court.

Lockback posted:

That's, like, criminally cherry picking a stat and comparing it to something else entirely. Embiid's BPM was +3 per 100 possessions this season. +/- is pretty flawed, but it really doesn't help make a case for Embiid.

I mean, I agree if he played all season he'd likely be the run away ROTY, but isn't voting for him based on "what have beens" doing the same narrative-chasing vote we make fun of?

+/- since 2001:

code:

Player		Tm	Season	 +/-
Draymond Green	GSW	2015-16	 1070
Stephen Curry	GSW	2015-16	 1022
Stephen Curry	GSW	2016-17	 1016
Stephen Curry	GSW	2014-15	 920
LeBron James	CLE	2008-09	 871
Draymond Green	GSW	2014-15	 839
Klay Thompson	GSW	2015-16	 836
Draymond Green	GSW	2016-17	 824
Klay Thompson	GSW	2016-17	 799

Something...something...light...years.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:49

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

looking forward to the long-rumored Playoff Wade who occasionally plays defense instead of doing the thing when thinks he is fouled and then while the other team is on the break he goes over to the sidelines and starts working on an official complaint to the league office with half glasses and a giant old-fashioned typewriter.

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:51

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# ? May 15, 2024 04:04

Shear Modulus: Jun 9, 2010

R.D. Mangles posted:

looking forward to the long-rumored Playoff Wade who occasionally plays defense instead of doing the thing when thinks he is fouled and then while the other team is on the break he goes over to the sidelines and starts working on an official complaint to the league office with half glasses and a giant old-fashioned typewriter.

does he have one of those lamps with the green plastic shades

# ? Apr 14, 2017 05:52

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