Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Space Kablooey
May 6, 2009



Speaking of, do you know where your avatar is from? I've been meaning to ask via PM, but you don't have Plat.

Psycho Society posted:

It was made by Barons Cyber Skull, but the image is from this

https://vimeo.com/108650530

Thanks!

Space Kablooey fucked around with this message at 15:24 on Apr 20, 2017

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Nancy
Nov 23, 2005



Young Orc

zakharov posted:

It's Murder Time

I [24F] just found out my fiancée [32M] of six months was fired from his job and has been hiding it from me for weeks. I don't know if this is salavageable.

lol dude didn't even last over a week at a loving set-up job and he failed at the easiest part of any job; showing up on time or at all :v:

Psycho Society
Oct 21, 2010

HardDiskD posted:

Speaking of, do you know where your avatar is from? I've been meaning to ask via PM, but you don't have Plat.

It was made by Barons Cyber Skull, but the image is from this

https://vimeo.com/108650530

Psycho Society fucked around with this message at 15:20 on Apr 20, 2017

Nancy
Nov 23, 2005



Young Orc
I tried to edit this trainwreck down a bit.

I [24m] don't know what to do about my GF [24F] of 10 years and my parents hating each other.

quote:

Background info: I started dating my girlfriend when I was 14. We’ve loved each other (…) she broke up with me for 3 months in grade 12 (...)

(...)

So now to the issue at hand. Back in August, one year after we got engaged and 9 years total of being together, my GF/fiance tells me she met someone else, they had hung out a few times, kissed, and that we she’s confused and needs space. This led to a break-up one month later as she didn’t want to stop seeing this guy (who she worked with). (…) Soon after going back to school, having moved in with a new roommate (a stranger from craigslist) my GF changed her mind and wanted to fix things. I was resentful, tried not to speak with her etc. and had a few conversations via FB messenger asking my parents what to do. They gave me advice that was largely critical of my Ex and based on thinking of long term issues (i.e. she’s already broken up with you twice now, you were engaged, she cheated, she’s unstable now so think of what pregnancy hormones may do etc. etc.). I also was resentful, so I refused to work on things, had a one-night stand, and tried shutting her out completely so I could move on, as moving on wasn’t possible by talking to her periodically and bringing up emotions.

Two days after our anniversary (Halloween) I got a call at work from her sister in a panic, requesting our old address (where my GF still lived) because she had received a disturbing email from her. (…) Climbing in the window I found her barely conscious with pills and alcohol everywhere. I forced her to vomit and kept her conscious until paramedics arrived. I was shocked and devastated about the whole thing despite everyone telling me it wasn’t my fault. I loved her for 10 years and those feelings don’t go away despite being wronged, was it worth her life for me to hold onto that grudge? I knew I couldn’t get back together with her right away and left her to her family for a few weeks to recover. I didn’t want to create a co-dependent situation and make her think that she could attempt suicide in the future if I ever wanted to leave in order make me stay. Later, we started talking, discussed what we wanted out of the relationship, what needed to change etc. etc. and she was doing very well on her new medication, so we decided to give it another go after Christmas.

My parents were very against this because of everything that had transpired, but begrudgingly agreed they would do their best to get over it, although my mother said she wasn’t ready to see her yet. This led to problems as I knew they didn’t approve and felt awkward bring up the topic of our relationship. Time went by and my GF became frustrated with my parents for not welcoming her back into the family despite being part of it for so long and frustrated with me for not sticking up for her and pussy-footing around the topic. She then revealed that she had seen the FB messages between my mother and I back in October and said that my mother is a hurtful person. I eventually convinced my GF to reach out to my parents, which she did in a long email explaining everything from her point of view, taking responsibility for her actions, but also saying how hurt she was by the things my parents said and blaming them for my “guilty-conscience” and inability to enjoy our relationship.

My parents weren’t happy with it, and despite speaking to them on the phone saying I want things to get better, they replied with an email that went point by point through my GF’s email pointing out the flaws in what she said, discrediting her suicide attempt as a bid for attention, and finally saying they would try to move forward…for my sake. GF responded with an email saying she has no desire for any further relationship with them as they had chosen to further damage the relationship, that they have caused ME significant stress and despair, and that they should know I am in good hands and she’ll do her best to help me through everything (which I’m sure from my parents’ point of view looks like she’s trying to turn me against them and ensure I have no relationship with them in the future). She also posted on her blog about the things my mother said in the email, and the fact that she could tell my brother was reading her blog every day and referred to him as a “stalker” for it, which my whole family found extremely inappropriate (and so did I).

So now my parents think I shouldn’t be with her and that my choice to stay with her is tearing the family apart, my GF wants nothing to do with my family, says they are toxic people and it’s bad for her mental health to associate with people who don’t like her and will talk behind her back, and I’m wondering if I’m ever going to be able to make my family whole again.

I’ve told both parties that I cannot discuss this with them until after my licensing exams in one month, as they were each calling me regularly wondering what I was going to do about it. I’m currently finishing my practicum and have infinite amounts of homework and studying to stress me out.

My GF is extremely caring, comforting, and loving. She’s goofy, very attractive, and extremely understanding with me. She comes over, does all my chores and makes dinner to help reduce my stress and give me more time to study. She listens to me whine about everything, and makes sure we go for walks or hikes when she visits to help with the stress. She’s a very loving partner with me, I feel comfortable and at home with her, as after 10 years together she’s my best friend, but I don’t know how to proceed. Grad is coming up and instead of being excited about my future, having freedom and a career, all I am feeling is extremely overwhelmed and lost.

Any advice on how to proceed?

TL;DR: Fiance cheated & dumped me, attempted suicide, we got back together, her and my parents hate each other, what do?

My advice is murder/suicide so their love will last forever.

Nancy
Nov 23, 2005



Young Orc
Holy poo poo this one is goooood.

Me f(25) with my bf m(31) of 2 years. I think he has a really unhealthy relationship w/ his parents. He's...obsessed with them and prioritizes them over me even though I'm chronically ill

quote:

Yep my boyfriend is obsessed with his parents. Despite my user name here, I actually do like them. They are kind people.
But, they live over an hour away. My boyfriend is on the phone with them DAILY. For some reason he lies about this and claims they "almost never" talk but he's basically gaslighting me about this because they talk every loving day.
He doesn't seem to be able to make any decision without their input. If we get in a fight he drives straight to their house to spend the night. He plans to save MOST/ALL of his money for them down the line (I guess he won't have his own retirement?) He once broke his phone and got a new one all of two days later, after two days of panic that his parents won't be able to get a hold of him.
He visits them (not a day visit, a multi-day sleepover) multiple times a month, maybe 3 or 4. He also claims this is an outright lie and that he "almost never" sees them. (Why is he gaslighting me about this?!!)
He prioritizes his family over me BIG TIME even though he claims he already sees/treats me as his wife.
Here is an important example: You need to know that I am chronically ill. I have intractable epilepsy. I have near constant seizure activity in my brain that can not be controlled at this time by modern medicine. I wait for a cure in vain. I can not drive. I can not be alone for very long. I can not take a bath or shower by myself, I can not cook with heat, I can not take public transportation. Yeah it sucks. I also am a single mom to a 4 year old. So you'd think that someone who sees me as his "wife" would make sure to be here for me right? Wrong.
He says yes to anything they ask no matter what without checking with me. He will be staying at their place next month for multiple weeks. Another important thing: he is staying there to babysit his severely disabled brother. This is his main priority in life so I'm tired of him pretending that it's me. His brother has severe delays in every area. He is 30 years old but a newborn baby on the inside. He can not feed himself (nor would he understand what food is anyways), in diapers, self-injurious, completely non-verbal and cant be alone for a single minute. He doesn't recognize anyone or have any sense of where he is or what he's doing. It's hard to explain but imagine the most severely disabled person you've ever seen, and then imagine this person is worse.
Yes I get it, that sucks. But he isn't watching him to help out his desperate parents who have no other options. He is watching him for weeks so they can take a multi-month vacation to Europe. Meanwhile...I'm disabled too and won't be able to have my son while he's gone and also my best friend is moving in to babysit me while he's gone because I have literally no other options. I have no family here and I'm not well enough to be alone.
He doesn't even check with me first. He just says "aww my parents get to take a vacation!! I'll be gone most of May babe". And i'm left scrambling to figure out how I'll survive while he is gone.
I'm just trying to live a normal life the best I can but his parents vacation is more important to him?
Unless I'm being a TOTAL rear end in a top hat here and if so I expect I'll be ripped apart.
I really worry about our future. He refuses to move anywhere because of his parents. He won't do holidays with me because of his parents. All of our life plans go on hold if his parents need something. ALL of his/our money he plans to go to his parents and his brother. (This sucks to say, but I also out-earn him and will continue to eclipse his salary. I'll make well over double what he makes. I'm a software developer and he's an artist. but it's pretty clear he expects "our" money to go to his parents)
Is this normal at all? Am I crazy here ? This seems WAY over the top.
tl;dr: Bf is obsessed w/ his parents and will drop everything to do anything they ask, even if it's at the expense of my own health and life.

Disabled lady jealous of more disabled man, mad at slightly less disabled man

Space Kablooey
May 6, 2009


Charles Get-Out posted:

I [24m] don't know what to do about my GF [24F] of 10 years and my parents hating each other.


Just dump the GF.

Nancy
Nov 23, 2005



Young Orc

HardDiskD posted:

Just dump the GF.

But they love each other, she's family!

Space Kablooey
May 6, 2009


Charles Get-Out posted:

But they love each other, she's family!

Sunk-cost fallacy is a hell of a thing, man.

Bored
Jul 26, 2007

Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.

chitoryu12 posted:

...how do you milk a prostate?

It involves a very small farmer.

Syncopated
Oct 21, 2010

Thank you posting friend.

VanSandman
Feb 16, 2011
SWAP.AVI EXCHANGER

Charles Get-Out posted:

Holy poo poo this one is goooood.

Me f(25) with my bf m(31) of 2 years. I think he has a really unhealthy relationship w/ his parents. He's...obsessed with them and prioritizes them over me even though I'm chronically ill


Disabled lady jealous of more disabled man, mad at slightly less disabled man

Human life is tragicomic.

Slugworth
Feb 18, 2001

If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!

Bubblyblubber posted:

My [26/F] mother [67/F] wants me to deal with my ex-fiance [27/M] who still lives with her- 3+ years after the fact.
I wouldn't have believed this story if something similar hadn't happened with one of my exes. Her dad had gotten super close with one of her exes, and she hated it, but he just stayed close with the guy for years. We were gonna go to her parents for Christmas once, but her mom called her in the morning and said Christmas was cancelled because her youngest brother was sick. Halfway through the phone call, my ex suddenly got this heartbroken look on her face and hurried to end the call - She had heard her ex's voice in the background - Her parents had literally chosen to have her ex over for Christmas rather than their own daughter.

Tiny Deer
Jan 16, 2012

Charles Get-Out posted:

Holy poo poo this one is goooood.

Me f(25) with my bf m(31) of 2 years. I think he has a really unhealthy relationship w/ his parents. He's...obsessed with them and prioritizes them over me even though I'm chronically ill


Disabled lady jealous of more disabled man, mad at slightly less disabled man

'I can't believe he's so selfish as to spend all his time taking care of someone else when he could be spending all his time taking care of me!'

The only thing I can say for sure is this guy has A Type.

Tiny Deer
Jan 16, 2012

Oh man :siren: IMPORTANT GRIMLY FUNNY INFORMATION BURIED IN COMMENTS

quote:

quote:

but it isn't right or fair for you to put some much pressure on your SO to take of of both you and I'm assuming your child.

You're right. So to prevent that, I started getting help from my ex-husband (my baby's dad). We are great friends and he LOVES to help me out but current bf throws a fit about that because it makes him jealous. This is why I get mad. If he isn't going to be around to help me, and he isn't going to let me get help from my ex, and my parents don't live nearby, what the gently caress does he expect me to do?

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

Tiny Deer posted:

'I can't believe he's so selfish as to spend all his time taking care of someone else when he could be spending all his time taking care of me!'

The only thing I can say for sure is this guy has A Type.

That's really not fair at all. If you were severely handicapped if she is, and you guys have a kid together, the dad really does need to put in some effort there. It sucks that his brother is disabled, but he made the choice to get married. He made the choice to have a kid.

Also it is loving weird to call your parents every day

Gloryhold It!
Sep 22, 2008

Fucking
Adorable
Tbf, she's real loving disabled and the dude can't be in two places at once.

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

Tiny Deer posted:

'I can't believe he's so selfish as to spend all his time taking care of someone else when he could be spending all his time taking care of me!'

The only thing I can say for sure is this guy has A Type.

for real. i cant even fathom having to care for a profoundly disabled family member, and then deciding that i should date someone who also requires a massive amount of care. like, take a break sometime guy

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

Pick posted:

That's really not fair at all. If you were severely handicapped if she is, and you guys have a kid together, the dad really does need to put in some effort there. It sucks that his brother is disabled, but he made the choice to get married. He made the choice to have a kid.

Also it is loving weird to call your parents every day

its not his kid tho

e: and theyre not married

Patrick Spens
Jul 21, 2006

"Every quarterback says they've got guts, But how many have actually seen 'em?"
Pillbug

Pick posted:

That's really not fair at all. If you were severely handicapped if she is, and you guys have a kid together, the dad really does need to put in some effort there. It sucks that his brother is disabled, but he made the choice to get married. He made the choice to have a kid.

Also it is loving weird to call your parents every day

Not his kid. Which makes this whole thing crazier.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

its not his kid tho

e: and theyre not married

If you're in a serious, long-term relationship with another person, it's your kid too.

Mirthless
Mar 27, 2011

by the sex ghost

Haifisch posted:

The crime: Thinking pranks are funny. The sentence: :murder:.

what's wrong with torturing 8 year olds? are you saying that making a kid in elementary school cry isn't cool and funny?

:murder:

Tiny Deer
Jan 16, 2012

Pick posted:

That's really not fair at all. If you were severely handicapped if she is, and you guys have a kid together, the dad really does need to put in some effort there. It sucks that his brother is disabled, but he made the choice to get married. He made the choice to have a kid.

Also it is loving weird to call your parents every day

They aren't married and it's not his kid, which shouldn't matter really because when you date someone with a child you are accepting the possibility of being a parent to that kid, but that's a whole other thing.

The story actually gets really sad :( she's only been severely disabled for a few months and reading between the lines a little she's very, very angry about it. She's projecting a lot of rage onto his family because she's scared of how dependant she's become.

I don't think it's going to work out between them because he is going to choose his brother and that's inadvertently going to confirm her suspicions that her new disability will severely impact her life.

Just a bucket of tragedy all around.

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!
whoa. yeah, if she's just recently become severely disabled, it's hard to fault the guy for already having commitments to his brother. that is a totally poo poo situation in every way :(

it even becomes less weird that he calls his parents so often and freaks out when he isn't available to them- he needs to be on call to help with his brother. god, what an awful world this is

Mirthless
Mar 27, 2011

by the sex ghost

Whorelord posted:

Me [14 F] with my parents [37 M/ 35 F] , won't stop being inappropiate


lmao

lol

"my birth and subsequent childhood didn't suck all of the love and affection out of my parent's relationship and it's really grossing me out, what can I do to make them stop loving?"

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

Mirthless posted:

lol

"my birth and subsequent childhood didn't suck all of the love and affection out of my parent's relationship and it's really grossing me out, what can I do to make them stop loving?"

ehhh, i was on the parents side until the point where they're all sitting around the living room and her dad says to her "i'm gonna destroy your mom later, just absolutely wreck her, sexually"

Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Dec 22, 2005

GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS
Easy, the epileptic woman takes an uber to his parents house and mercy-:murder:s the guy's brother. 5 people suddenly have much better lives, it's like the trolley problem.

That one is really sad. I personally couldn't deal with someone who dropped everything to run over to do an errand for their parents, but the brother makes that situation hard. If his parents can afford a month-long trip to europe they can afford to hire a caretaker for their son.

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

If his parents can afford a month-long trip to europe they can afford to hire a caretaker for their son.

This is a good point and doesn't paint the parents in a very good light

Gumbel2Gumbel
Apr 28, 2010

Is that idiot using his vacation so his parents can take their vacation

Nancy
Nov 23, 2005



Young Orc

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Easy, the epileptic woman takes an uber to his parents house and mercy-:murder:s the guy's brother. 5 people suddenly have much better lives, it's like the trolley problem.

That one is really sad. I personally couldn't deal with someone who dropped everything to run over to do an errand for their parents, but the brother makes that situation hard. If his parents can afford a month-long trip to europe they can afford to hire a caretaker for their son.

This is what I'm feeling. While I kind of understand his desire to care for his brother, both of his parents are around and it sounds like his GF actually needs the help. Either way, he's def stuck up his parents rear end too much.

Tiny Deer posted:

Oh man :siren: IMPORTANT GRIMLY FUNNY INFORMATION BURIED IN COMMENTS
You're right. So to prevent that, I started getting help from my ex-husband (my baby's dad). We are great friends and he LOVES to help me out but current bf throws a fit about that because it makes him jealous. This is why I get mad. If he isn't going to be around to help me, and he isn't going to let me get help from my ex, and my parents don't live nearby, what the gently caress does he expect me to do?

This really can't help the situation between the BF and GF, even though it is probably helping the woman a lot...

Mirthless
Mar 27, 2011

by the sex ghost

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

ehhh, i was on the parents side until the point where they're all sitting around the living room and her dad says to her "i'm gonna destroy your mom later, just absolutely wreck her, sexually"

:shrug: it's oversharing but it's a better example than bitterly sniping at each other because they can't keep their simmering contempt to themselves anymore

like she hates it and is grossed out by it now but she's got an example of what a good marriage looks like and that can make all the difference in the kind of relationships people foster and what their standard of healthy is

WoodrowSkillson
Feb 24, 2005

*Gestures at 60 years of Lions history*

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

ehhh, i was on the parents side until the point where they're all sitting around the living room and her dad says to her "i'm gonna destroy your mom later, just absolutely wreck her, sexually"

she'll get over it

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

Mirthless posted:

:shrug: it's oversharing but it's a better example than bitterly sniping at each other because they can't keep their simmering contempt to themselves anymore

i feel like there ought to be a reasonable middle between these two but I'm not sure I've ever actually seen it

Tiny Deer
Jan 16, 2012

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

Is that idiot using his vacation so his parents can take their vacation

Nah he's unemployed and lives off her money.

It's funny/sad that she left a lot of information out of her OP that swung me from thinking she was maybe being kind of unreasonable to thinking this guy needs to decide what the gently caress his priorities are and also get a loving job.

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

Mirthless posted:

:shrug: it's oversharing but it's a better example than bitterly sniping at each other because they can't keep their simmering contempt to themselves anymore

she's 14 dude

it's great that her parents aren't bitter husks of their former selves but if you're in your 30s and have a child you need to have the mental capacity to know not to describe your sex life + sex plans to any 14 year old person, much less your daughter

i get that it's better than her parents hating each other, but its still not great

Barudak
May 7, 2007

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

ehhh, i was on the parents side until the point where they're all sitting around the living room and her dad says to her "i'm gonna destroy your mom later, just absolutely wreck her, sexually"

Nah, although thats how my family has pretty much always been from great grandparents on down so obviously it doesnt phase me. Youre just making it clear this is the last game of pinochle youre gonna play and letting the world know you still got it burnin for your partner.

My families sex ed talk included the phrase "a good loving"

Tiny Deer
Jan 16, 2012

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

i feel like there ought to be a reasonable middle between these two but I'm not sure I've ever actually seen it

A story about these parents will always be about how the dad loves talking about how he's going to smash mom's pussy hard. I don't mean stories this kid tells, I mean that to everyone who knows them their defining trait is that they're enormous perverts who talk about sex too much.

'Yeah...Greg...Greg is...well, he's a really friendly guy, good worker, just uh...don't hang out with him and his wife at the Christmas Party, okay?'

'They gently caress in the broom closet every year, that's why. loving Greg.'

Unless the kid is exaggerating but it's not as funny that way.

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

Barudak posted:

letting the world know you still got it burnin for your partner

why

what's the value in doing this

e: i should say, what's the value in doing this, explicitly, and making sure everyone knows you're referencing specifically boning down, in front of your minor child

WoodrowSkillson
Feb 24, 2005

*Gestures at 60 years of Lions history*

Tiny Deer posted:

Unless the kid is exaggerating but it's not as funny that way.

this is nearly 100% likely given the OP is a teen

Panfilo
Aug 27, 2011

EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬
I don't think it unreasonable someone talks to their parents every day;my wife talks to her parents very often and visits them multiple times a week. They're also awesome inlaws that have been very helpful and supportive so it's cool that they are close.

Guess most other goons have lovely or autistic parents they can't stand dealing with more than three times a year.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Tiny Deer
Jan 16, 2012

WoodrowSkillson posted:

this is nearly 100% likely given the OP is a teen

I know, I know, but the idea of grown adults with a 14 year old saying in front of a crowd of people "baby I'm going to loving WRECK DAT rear end TONIGHT" is so good. I want it to be real.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply