/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

Me [28M] with my wife [25F] of 5 years and two kids, discussing threesums then...

quote:

Hi All I have been married to the wife (25) for 5 years and we have two kids.

We have recently been having dreams of her with another guy and having a threesum. (With me present) We discuss it and she is up for it and the idea initially is super hot! Example we have hot sex after a discussion. Then annoyingly to me I get a bit anxious about it all and sometimes feel a bit sick. I really fantasize about this and want to explore with her but then I get these frustrating anxious feelings... What do I do?

tldr: Extreamly turned on but anxious about watching wife with someone else.

then don't..?

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:50

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# ? May 31, 2024 14:48

girl pants: Sep 21, 2006; I feel a great disturbance in my pants

LethalGeek posted:

Me [28M] with my wife [25F] of 5 years and two kids, discussing threesums then...
then don't..?

How many comments are there suggesting that he look into compersion or frubble or whatever poly dorks call it

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:52

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

I Was The Fury posted:

Oh my god

My [21F] boyfriend [19M] never wears warm clothing in the Winter/Autumn period and he gets sick constantly all because he likes his biceps.

Oh no, she's dating one of those guys.

girl pants posted:

Wait if it's autumn in Australia shouldn't it be getting hot and not cold

It's the southern hemisphere, remember? We're just leaving summer and starting autumn.

Megillah Gorilla fucked around with this message at 16:55 on Apr 26, 2017

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:52

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

LethalGeek posted:

Me [28M] with my wife [25F] of 5 years and two kids, discussing threesums then...
then don't..?

Buddy buddy buddy, embrace the nervous orgasm. You'll never go back.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:55

Panfilo: Aug 27, 2011; Can't post for 11 days!

Threesum: The cumulative effect of 3 people who are not even mature enough for a monogamous relationship let alone a poly one.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:54

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

WampaLord posted:

You know you don't get sick just from being in the cold, right? Like, that's a myth.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/wales/4433496.stm

"'When colds are circulating in the community, many people are mildly infected but show no symptoms,' Prof Eccles said.

'If they become chilled, this causes a pronounced constriction of the blood vessels in the nose and shuts off the warm blood that supplies the white cells that fight infection.'

'The reduced defences in the nose allow the virus to get stronger and common cold symptoms develop.'"

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:54

girl pants: Sep 21, 2006; I feel a great disturbance in my pants

Gorilla Salad posted:

Oh no, she's dating one of those guys.

Oh sweet child, no.

After a quick Google I have learned some things about how Australians refer to their seasons. Carry on.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:55

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

LethalGeek posted:

Me [28M] with my wife [25F] of 5 years and two kids, discussing threesums then...
then don't..?

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:55

I Was The Fury: Oct 19, 2012; Always stop to smell the flowers, just in case they're weeds

How do I [31M] handle my girlfriend [30F] of 5 months being lazy?

quote:

tl;dr: Do I try to convince my girlfriend to stop being so lazy; do I tolerate it; or do I leave?

I don't like how my girlfriend reacts to me asking her to help with chores. She freezes up, gets a scared, defensive look on her face, and says irrational, unhelpful things. I end up apologizing, coddling her the rest of the night while she lies about nothing being wrong. I'm afraid I'm setting myself up a long life of doing most of the dirty work, walking on egg shells, and feeling like a 1-person team.

I only ask her to help with dishes and trash. Early on, we agreed that I would prepare all meals, and she would wash our mutual dishes. When we're not eating together, we agreed to wash our own dishes.

We've been living together for 4 months. She works full time outside the house, and I work from home. She does her own dishes, but she doesn't stick to our agreement of her washing ours. She claims it's because a couple dishes aren't a problem, and therefore she doesn't think about it. She would do it if they were overflowing, which is not what actually happens, but that's her logic.

Last night, I agreed to go get pizza, buy groceries, and use her ATM card to get her part of the rent out of the bank. She said she'd be doing her hair. When I got home, she had been sitting on the couch looking at Instagram the whole time. The bowl we had both eaten dinner out of was still unwashed on the table. Is it irrational of me to ask her to be more mindful about doing chores when I'm out running errands?

Her reaction made me sick. All I did was say, "hey baby", and she instantly froze up and looked at me as if she had committed a deadly sin. I continued with, "in the future, when I'm out running errands for us, could you wash our dishes or clean up?" She responded with, "well, sorry, I didn't think about it. Is this a problem right now?", saying it in a way that made me feel like I was asking her to move a mountain.

Of course, all she saw was one dish, but what she's conveniently forgetting is that earlier in the week, I ended up cleaning all of our dishes that had been piling up for days. So, this isn't about one dish. It's about me worrying that her thought process (only clean up when the mess inconveniences her) is going to make this an on-going problem where I can't bring up issues without her getting mad, and I end up doing all of the work.

The problem is that I'm home most of the time and need to use the sink. A few dishes become a few more, and I end up doing all of them every time.

Am I being irrational? I drove around, spent over $50 on groceries and pizza, and I even used her own ATM card to get rent money out for her because she hates doing it herself. And then I get home, and she's been sitting on the couch. That's fine, but then she reacts negatively and makes it seem like I'm attacking her over one dish? Should I just shut up and do the dishes?

There's also the trash. This week, I took the trash out of the bin, tied the bag, replaced with a new bag, and placed the old one by the door. I figured since I did the first part, she can have the simple job of carrying the tied back out to the dumpster. Days later, after a few pizza boxes piled up next to the bag, she hadn't touched the bag. Then one day, she smelled something weird and lifted the bag to find it leaking. She told me about the leak, as if I should have known that would happen and that it's my fault for not having taken it out. In my mind, I was thinking "why don't you just take it out right now? It takes 2 minutes." I wanted to see how long she'd go before taking it out, but after 6 days, I gave in and threw it out myself. The pizza boxes are still next to the door, 8 days later.

Doing dishes and trash isn't the problem for me. It's the pattern of behavior that looks like procrastination, blaming others instead of taking responsibility, and a lack of action that can only be explained by a general stupidity.

I didn't pick the smartest girl. It doesn't help that she's usually stoned when she's home, and she makes it seem like work sucks the life out of her. Being high / fatigued only make it easier for her to excuse her laziness. She has some dangerous behaviors that she tolerates, and those habits now affect me.

I hate to call her lazy because it's a loaded term, but I can't stop thinking about it. Not only did she tell me early on that her ex would call her lazy a lot (as a way of making him look bad, as if she was the victim), but looking back to when I first came to visit, I see warning signs.

Should I suck it up and do the dishes and trash on top of basically everything else? This whole thing is turning me off, and I don't know if I can stand listening her to go on and on about how much she loves me and how I'm so amazing. All it makes me think of is her total disrespect stemming from stupid laziness that only gets corrected if I ruin a day of our lives asking her to lift a finger.

I hate to think the answer is to leave, but I don't see why this isn't going to continue becoming a bigger and bigger problem.

Oh, as a side note, it's now the following morning, and that dish is still unwashed on the table. I have a feeling that if I don't do it, today's going to be a bad day.

Protip 1: don't move in with an SO after one month.
Protip 2: don't try to outlast someone who's standards of cleanliness are lower than yours. It will never work.
Protip 3: holy poo poo dude just leave

# ? Apr 26, 2017 16:59

LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

girl pants posted:

How many comments are there suggesting that he look into compersion or frubble or whatever poly dorks call it

Mostly that fantasies are ok to stay fantasies.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:00

Blotto_Otter: Aug 16, 2013

I Was The Fury posted:

Oh my god

My [21F] boyfriend [19M] never wears warm clothing in the Winter/Autumn period and he gets sick constantly all because he likes his biceps.

Well if its really that cold just make fun of how obviously rock-hard pointy his nipples are, that will shame him into wearing another layer. Or it will backfire and he'll never wear anything but a thin t-shirt ever again, at which point please dump him so he can find someone less lame. ~~He's probably only dating you because you can buy him beer, anyway.~~ I should've gone to college in Australia

Blotto_Otter fucked around with this message at 17:11 on Apr 26, 2017

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:00

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I'm way behind on this thread but I like this because it is a weird inversion of a common theme. Text isn't that interesting.

Me [28 M] with my ex/boss [21 F] of 3 months, I know you're not supposed to date who you work with, I did, and we broke up. Trying to figure out what to do next.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:01

I Was The Fury: Oct 19, 2012; Always stop to smell the flowers, just in case they're weeds

Blotto_Otter posted:

Well if its really that cold just make fun of how obviously rock-hard pointy his nipples are, that will shame him into wearing another layer. Or it will backfire and he'll never wear anything but a thin t-shirt ever again, at which point please dump him so he can find someone less lame. He's probably only dating you because you can buy him beer, anyway.

It's Australia, he can buy his own beer

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:03

Whorelord: May 1, 2013; Jump into the well...

I'd block out the ages but i'm both lazy and this just pure unbridled :murder:

I (26F) befriended a girl (27F) from my gym. Yesterday I found out shes good friends with a girl (27F) who hates me and has been feeding her back information.Non-Romantic

quote:

Hey everyone, I realize this title probably comes off super high school, and I honestly feel like it is. I feel really sick inside after yesterday and hope for some advice on what to do with this mess..

Backstory: I used to be friends with this guy Lars who works at the same store as me. His long time gf Lina hated that we got along as coworkers and they would have fights about him walking to work with me or having me on facebook. Eventually he stopped talking to me to avoid the drama but she didn't stop hating me. She sent an anonymous complaint to the company that named me in it and said I had been rude to a customer and made them feel unwelcome. The complaint also said "every time I looked for her to help me I saw her flirting with another staff member" which is basically what tipped me off to it being her who sent it in. Even though Lars and I keep it to hi and bye and work talk, Lina still manages to show up a few times a week and throw me death stares if she sees me, sometimes muttering "bitch" if we walk past each other. This apparently has happened before with other friends of his. Apparently she doesn't have a problem if they're "ugly" or "fat" and don't overshare too much, but even mentioning that you're sad about your ex boyfriend will convince her you're trying to get Lars to fall in love with you.
So a few months ago I met a girl named Hanna at my gym who seemed nice. There's only like 2 gyms in our area and most people my age go to the one I go to as it is more economical. She said she thought she had seen me at the store I work and I confirmed that yes I worked there. She said she didn't have facebook but we exchanged numbers instead.

Over the next few months we talked a lot and often went for lunch or coffees. She seemed nice and like nothing was off at all, just a cool girl who was easy to talk to. She asked me one day about Lars saying something like "That guy in your store is so cute" and then I jokingly said like "don't go there, his girlfriend will kill you for looking". And that's how we got to talking about Lina. I told her what had happened and how Lars is nice to everyone at work and I had 0 interest in him and he had never ever been more than just friendly to me. I told her all the stuff after, the complaint, the passive aggressive walking around the store a few times a week to monitor if we were talking or not, the glares and cursing. She seemed sympathetic and encouraged me to just stay away from Lars to avoid a problem, but that I should call Lina out if she said more to me. She asked if I missed talking to him and I said "I mean he was a nice person to talk to, so I guess?"
I talked about personal things with Hanna, like my sister who had a shopping addiction and had maxed out her cards and it was stressful for my parents. We talked about one of my friends who never came out to see us anymore because she was super into playing online games. I told her about my ex and how I missed him and I was sad because he had a new gf. And she told me stuff too of course so I didn't feel like it was a one-sided exchange.

Yesterday Lina came to the store again as I was leaving and she snorted when she walked past me so I asked her if she wanted to say something. She turned around and she was smiling and she asked me if the reason I missed Lars so much was because my ex has a new gf and no one else wanted me. She might as well have slapped me! I just stood there processing and she said "Must be so hard with your crazy sister racking up debts. You sure love to open your mouth, dont you? In more ways than one I am sure. I wonder how Lisa will feel when I tell her you tell everyone you meet that she just lives in her room playing games like a recluse. Maybe you should focus on your own life instead of trying tog et everyone to feel sorry for you. No one cares about you or your stupid problems."

I told her I didnt even speak to Lars anymore and that I didnt want her boyfriend or for anyone to feel sorry and wtf was she going on about? She says "You know my friend, right? Hanna? Maybe you shouldn't have opened your mouth and said a word about me. Now you'll learn your lesson when I let everyone know what you've said. Unless, I guess, if you quit or something and I dont have to see your face here again." And she just walks into the store and leaves me standing there feeling like I just got hit by a truck.

I go home and Im just feeling completely at a loss. I go on facebook and I look up Lina and sure enough there is Hanna in her pictures and on her friends list, after she told me she didnt have a facebook. I call Hanna and it goes to voicemail, so I text her saying I need to speak with her. She finally calls back a few hours later and I told her what happened and why she lied to me. She sounded so casual when we were talking like she wasnt bothered by it at all. She said that she had told Lina she saw me at her gym and Lina said she should befriend me and find out if I had a crush on Lars and that it was no ones fault except my own that I gave them so much more information. I started crying and she just said "Okaaay well Im going to go. I think its best if we dont talk anymore."

I feel so so sick right now. I thought I had a friend I could trust and instead now the girl who hates me has all this personal information I told someone in confidence. I can't stop thinking about how she told me to quit and I dont even know what to do. I just need some kind of direction to go in, I feel so lost guys..
tl;dr: I made a friend at my gym, turns out she is close friends with a girl who is convinced I am after her boyfriend who I work with. I told this girl personal things and now the girl who hates me wants me to quit my job or she will tell everyone what I said. Feel so sick.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:03

chernobyl kinsman: Mar 18, 2007; a friend of the friendly atom; Soiled Meat

new phone who dis posted:

This girl I was talking to decided to shave her head bald and got mad at me when I said it looked like she was either Britney Spears Crazy or dying of cancer.

girls with shaved heads are hot and this is a bad opinion

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:03

Whorelord: May 1, 2013; Jump into the well...

chernobyl kinsman posted:

girls with shaved heads are hot and this is a bad opinion

im sorry about you being gay

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:05

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

I Was The Fury posted:

How do I [31M] handle my girlfriend [30F] of 5 months being lazy?

Protip 1: don't move in with an SO after one month.
Protip 2: don't try to outlast someone who's standards of cleanliness are lower than yours. It will never work.
Protip 3: holy poo poo dude just leave

lmao "I loving hate my stupid lazy whiner girlfriend, what do?"

he should leave but, realistically, a charmer like him isn't gonna do better and he knows it

I bought my (23f) BF (23m) of one year flowers. He's made fun of me merciless for it. I'm hurt and I'm fed up but he won't get the message. I was just trying to do something nice.

quote:

Sorry long time lurker and occiasional advice giver so it sucks to be on the other side.

I've been with "jimmy" for a little over a year. A month ago we had a huge fight because he seemed to be overly flirting with out waitress. In the end I was being too sensitive but i legitimately thought we were breaking up over it. We didn't speak for a week and I was overjoyed when he calle me.

As a gesture of how much I love him i decided to send him a very extensive bouquet of flowers. I think he actually liked them but he made some very mean jokes that verged on homophobia. I was pretty hurt so i addressed him directly and said that I didn't appreciate the jokes. He said he was sorry and that even though he wasn't sure how to receive flowers, he appreciate the gesture and that the jokes would stop.

Well not only have they not stopped, he jokes about me and the flowers when we are out with his friends. He makes snide remarks when we have the slighter disagreement (for example just now he forgot to turn at me street when he was dropping me odd and said "oh poo poo, i guess I better get 1800flowers on the line since that's what we do now.")

I told him I didn't appreciate the joke and got out of the car without kissing him. I've been direct, I've asked nicely and I don't know what else to do.

A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 17:09 on Apr 26, 2017

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:07

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Whorelord posted:

I'd block out the ages but i'm both lazy and this just pure unbridled

I (26F) befriended a girl (27F) from my gym. Yesterday I found out shes good friends with a girl (27F) who hates me and has been feeding her back information.Non-Romantic

This is why men are superior to women.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:06

Blotto_Otter: Aug 16, 2013

I Was The Fury posted:

It's Australia, he can buy his own beer

Oh whoops, I forgot Australia has less dumb liquor laws. Well in that case, I choose to believe he's dating her out of some weird Oedipal thing because the list of people that should care about you putting on a jacket when its cold is 1) your mom 2) that's it, that's the list.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:08

The Schwa: Jul 1, 2008

Blotto_Otter posted:

Well if its really that cold just make fun of how obviously rock-hard pointy his nipples are, that will shame him into wearing another layer. Or it will backfire and he'll never wear anything but a thin t-shirt ever again, at which point please dump him so he can find someone less lame. He's probably only dating you because you can buy him beer, anyway.

If they're Australian he can buy his own beer, dude

efb, thread moves fast

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:07

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

chernobyl kinsman posted:

girls with shaved heads are hot and this is a bad opinion

Shaved with a razor, not buzzed. Short hair is fine. No hair looks abysmal. You.re either a Nazi, a basket case, or terminally ill.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:08

Whorelord: May 1, 2013; Jump into the well...

I Was The Fury posted:

Oh my god

My [21F] boyfriend [19M] never wears warm clothing in the Winter/Autumn period and he gets sick constantly all because he likes his biceps.

this woman's problem is she is dating an australian

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:08

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

I Was The Fury posted:

How do I [31M] handle my girlfriend [30F] of 5 months being lazy?

If she's working full time while he works at home, he can do more housework. Maybe she might want to cook occasionally as just washing up like a bitch is no fun. She might be super tired.

quote:

Doing dishes and trash isn't the problem for me. It's the pattern of behavior that looks like procrastination, blaming others instead of taking responsibility, and a lack of action that can only be explained by a general stupidity.

I didn't pick the smartest girl.

She's just stupid and stoned and sits in her own filth all the time but I don't mind, she's also irresponsible, I am the other hand am great :argh:

what do

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO fucked around with this message at 17:11 on Apr 26, 2017

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:08

chernobyl kinsman: Mar 18, 2007; a friend of the friendly atom; Soiled Meat

new phone who dis posted:

Shaved with a razor, not buzzed. Short hair is fine. No hair looks abysmal. You.re either a Nazi, a basket case, or terminally ill.

oh yeah alright that's no good

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:09

chernobyl kinsman: Mar 18, 2007; a friend of the friendly atom; Soiled Meat

Whorelord posted:

I'd block out the ages but i'm both lazy and this just pure unbridled

I (26F) befriended a girl (27F) from my gym. Yesterday I found out shes good friends with a girl (27F) who hates me and has been feeding her back information.Non-Romantic

why do people (women) deliberately make their lives as agonizingly complicated as possible

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:10

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO posted:

If she's working full time while he works at home, he can do more housework. Maybe she might want to cook occasionally as just washing up like a bitch is no fun. She might be super tired.

She's just stupid and stoned and sits in her own filth all the time but I don't mind, she's also irresponsible, I am the other hand am great what do

No, she's stoned. Working full-time isn't an excuse to neglect housework, and why should he have to do more since he works at home?

He needs to leave. Her ex already made it clear she is in fact lazy. He shouldn't call her stupid, since they are both stupid, but she's clearly the problem.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:13

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

I am not a super neat person but there is no need for any kind of food waste to be anywhere in the house other than the sink or the trash can. This means any kind of dirty dishes. Only the slobbiest of loving slobs leave those fuckers sitting around instead of doing the absolute minimum of taking them to the kitchen and rinsing them. I'm single, I live alone and a sink with dishes in it going a week is fine with me but I will regulate like crazy on any other form of food garbage in my living space.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:18

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

lmao "I loving hate my stupid lazy whiner girlfriend, what do?"

he should leave but, realistically, a charmer like him isn't gonna do better and he knows it

I bought my (23f) BF (23m) of one year flowers. He's made fun of me merciless for it. I'm hurt and I'm fed up but he won't get the message. I was just trying to do something nice.

oh, for gently caress's sake

this dude is so insecure it's honestly a little shocking. :sever:

before you walk in on him getting a brojob from his no-homo workout buddy

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:20

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I [27F] am gay. One of my best friends [28F] is straight. She is suggesting we get married for financial/companionship reasons. I'm tempted.

quote:

Throwaway because... yeah.

I know this sounds crazy. I know this is long. I would like some serious thoughts on it, though.

I have a best friend I'll call "Abby". Abby and I have known each other for several years. We met at work, developed a friendship outside of work, and kept that friendship even after we moved on to different jobs. We get along very well as friends and have quite a few common interests.

When I first met Abby, I did have a bit of a crush on her, but that went away fast after I found out she was not only straight, but in a relationship with her now-ex-fiance, "Bob".

I have not been in a relationship since I was 23 and broke off an engagement to a woman I loved very much. Since then, I wouldn't say I have been depressed or "broken" from romance, but I just haven't had any interest. I've focused on my career and friends, along with the little family I have left (coming out ruined quite a few relationships).

Bob and Abby were together for almost five years before Abby broke it off about six months ago. The three of us didn't interact that much (mostly just Abby and I), but from what I saw, Bob was a nice guy, if a bit shy and uncertain at times.

Abby claims that they just grew apart, and hasn't been that shaken up about breaking off the engagement. We've been hanging out almost weekly and talking near-daily as usual since then, and she seemed fine to me, not really lonely at all.

Well, Abby dropped a bomb on me last weekend. We met up at her place for dinner, drinks, and a cheesy movie (pretty standard for us). I praised Abby's cooking and commented on her immaculate apartment. I made some joke along the lines of "I need a woman to cook and clean for me since I'm so lazy and terrible at cooking, ha-ha".

Abby didn't laugh. Instead, she looked really serious for a second, then said, "Well, maybe we should just get married."

Of course, I thought she was joking at first. Ha-ha, very funny. Tossed in a few jabs about how we could adopt a couple of cats and be a real lesbian couple, yadda yadda. But Abby just stayed quiet. Eventually, I asked her if she was serious.

Turns out, she's been thinking about this for a while. Her reasoning goes like this:

-Abby's been struggling career-wise, and recently took a (hopefully) temp-to-hire position at a new company. She's lost her health insurance, but needs it for her chronic conditions (hormone issues, developing MS, and SAD/GAD). She also is trying to dig herself out of debt, which makes paying all the bills solo now difficult.
-Abby's cat and dog are struggling a bit now too since they have to be at home by themselves a lot more often. Abby's work schedule is opposite of mine, so if I lived with her, the pets would be better taken care of.
-I have a similar situation with my own dog, who's a rescue I took in after my sister had my niece and couldn't care for both (single mom with her own struggles). He would be better taken care of if there was a second person.
-Though I joked about it, I really do struggle with things like cooking and cleaning due to my own conditions--overcoming an eating disorder (binge eating/bulimia and depression that sometimes saps me of all energy/motivation to keep things tidy). Abby loves playing Susie Homemaker and never struggled with any of this, even when her mental illnesses first started manifesting.
-Abby argued that while I say I'm not, that I am lonely living on my own, especially being single for almost 4 years. TBH, I'm not sure if she's projecting or if she's picking up on something I didn't realize I was putting down. While I have felt little urge to date or engage in relationships beyond the physical, if I'm being truly honest with myself, coming home only to my pup does get me down from time to time.
-Finally, and this probably goes without saying, but it would be a very, very open marriage--basically roommates/friends with financial benefits. Win-win, in her eyes, at least.

I left her place this weekend in shock. I barely remember anything about the rest of the night (still kind of fuzzy on what movie we ended up watching...). At first, it just sounded so absurd, like the plot of a romantic comedy. But after some thinking... It sounds kind of nice to say I have a wife, even if she's just there for my health insurance and an extra tax break, lol.

On the other hand, divorce is inevitable. And... this is the kind of thing people opposed to gay marriage would point to about "ruining the sanctity of marriage". Not that straight couples haven't done the same thing before, but it definitely does strike a nerve there.

Am I crazy for even giving this a moment of honest thought? Has anyone ever been in a similar situation or known anyone who has?

TL;DR: Straight best friend wants us to get married for financial and companionship reasons. I'm gay as hell and considering it. Does this make me crazy?

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:21

Mirthless: Mar 27, 2011; by the sex ghost

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

I [27F] am gay. One of my best friends [28F] is straight. She is suggesting we get married for financial/companionship reasons. I'm tempted.

quote:
On the other hand, divorce is inevitable. And... this is the kind of thing people opposed to gay marriage would point to about "ruining the sanctity of marriage". Not that straight couples haven't done the same thing before, but it definitely does strike a nerve there.

sanctity of marriage :jerkbag:

i think this is a bad idea (drama waiting to happen) but who loving cares about christian feefs, they don't even think you are a person, lady

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:24

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

I [27F] am gay. One of my best friends [28F] is straight. She is suggesting we get married for financial/companionship reasons. I'm tempted.

This ruins lives btw. Anyone who thinks they're "gaming" marriage ultimately regrets it.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:26

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

I [27F] am gay. One of my best friends [28F] is straight. She is suggesting we get married for financial/companionship reasons. I'm tempted.

As long as they get a prenup I don't see any problem here.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:26

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

all the twisty poo poo our spines do is because we sort of jury-rigged bipedalism off a quadruped frame (where the back is more like an arch) and it is not how a halfway intelligent engineer would design things, no. The "modern lifestyle" doesn't have a ton to do with it, except in that now you can just keep on being alive for decades after a serious injury.

*i adjust my glasses all dramatic as a shitton of cherry petals blast the gently caress out of my rear end*

ahem, ACTUALLY, scars on ancient skeletons indicate that ill or enfeebled members of most protohuman tribes were well cared for by other members of the tribe. Even individuals with mental or physical damage that would have made them "dead weight" socially speaking lived decades after their encripplement, because "loving thy neighbor" is a loving superpower and altruism is the ONLY REASON humans SURVIVE ANYTHING.

plus neanderthals ate flowers for its medicinal benefits. but you won't learn that in Honkey College, no sir.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:27

Grem: Mar 29, 2004; Can't post for 27 days!

Whorelord posted:

I'd block out the ages but i'm both lazy and this just pure unbridled

I (26F) befriended a girl (27F) from my gym. Yesterday I found out shes good friends with a girl (27F) who hates me and has been feeding her back information.Non-Romantic

Literally every girl is like this. They get it from stupid reality TV shows that encourage them to be lovely to each other. Any girl that has seen a show on Bravo tries to live their life like that and it turns them in to supremely lovely people.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:31

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

I'm never lovely to my female friends, I am awesome to all of my friends.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:33

I Was The Fury: Oct 19, 2012; Always stop to smell the flowers, just in case they're weeds

Pick posted:

I'm never lovely to my female friends, I am awesome to all of my friends.

This is why you get used and abused by Hugh. Sometimes you just have to be lovely

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:35

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

I Was The Fury posted:

This is why you get used and abused by Hugh. Sometimes you just have to be lovely

Yeaaaah I told him if we were going to be friends he couldn't be mean to me any more and he decided then he wasn't interested. Kind of anti-climactic really.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:35

Grem: Mar 29, 2004; Can't post for 27 days!

Pick posted:

I'm never lovely to my female friends, I am awesome to all of my friends.

Sorry to break it to you but women, especially white women, are generally like that.

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:34

Blotto_Otter: Aug 16, 2013

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

I [27F] am gay. One of my best friends [28F] is straight. She is suggesting we get married for financial/companionship reasons. I'm tempted.

Abby's been struggling career-wise, and recently took a (hopefully) temp-to-hire position at a new company. She's lost her health insurance, but needs it for her chronic conditions (hormone issues, developing MS, and SAD/GAD). She also is trying to dig herself out of debt, which makes paying all the bills solo now difficult.

This is it, this is true marriage equality: gay people are now as free as straight people to make dumbfuck marriage decisions and endure a loveless marriage and suffer the financial ruin of an ugly divorce

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:35

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# ? May 31, 2024 14:48

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Pick posted:

This ruins lives btw. Anyone who thinks they're "gaming" marriage ultimately regrets it.

I know a couple who made it work - they were at least dating and got married so she could get citizenship, knowing it might not work out. They ended up breaking up fairly amicably and getting a divorce.

The guy was like, a born rule-breaker, he faked insanity to get out of the israeli military(did not get the full story sadly), I think he was primed for it.

The reddit story won't work at all though - the one who is a lesbian actually likes the other girl, who just seems to see dollar signs? I dunno...

# ? Apr 26, 2017 17:35

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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