Taiwan Number 1

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ntan1: Apr 29, 2009; sempai noticed me

Yeah I thought so. Sorry I don't live in China and this is in the United States.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 03:03

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# ? May 29, 2024 19:52

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Oh I wasn't making GBS threads on your story, just confirming.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 03:11

caberham: Mar 18, 2009; by Smythe; Grimey Drawer

angel opportunity posted:

Had a bit of a Chinar experience today.

We are trying to sell our car because we are moving in a few days, and my wife posted the ad also onto the local Chinese BBS.

A Chinese couple came to test drive the car, and I could tell immediately from looking at them that they were fresh off the boat and from a poor area of China. The guy had like scraggly facial hair, cargo shorts, and basically just lookedlike he smelled bad. The lady had almost all black on and like a cardigan even though it was super hot and humid out.

They talked to my wife a while and said they wanted to test drive it. I decided before selling the car that I wouldn't bar anyone from test driving it because it will be too hard to sell if I do that. Just looking at this guy though I could tell he would be a "Chinese driver" to put things nicely.

My wife sat in the backseat while the couple got in.

They only drove around the apartment complex parking lot and I went inside while they were driving. Some Indian guy who had already looked at the car texted me while they were test driving and told me "I want to buy the car, can I come get it now?"

I told him, "Some people who don't seem like they will buy it are test driving it now, I'll text you once they are done."

When they got back, I go outside and I see my wife and the guy's wife getting out of the car. My wife filled me in on what happened here because I couldn't see from where I was standing.

The guy had said he knows how to drive, but he looked at her and asks, "I put it in neutral to park it right?" He put the car in neutral and tried to take the key out. The key didn't come out, so he turned it the other way, which triggered the starter and made the engine rattle and chug.

My wife told him to put it in park, and he did, and so my wife got out thinking it was done.

I then whispered to her that the Indian guy is buying the car and to "get rid of these people."

Then I realized I'd heard that rattling sound like 2 or 3 times already. We looked over and saw the guy just sitting there and looking confused. He just kept turning the key more and more and making the engine chug. I told my wife, "Tell him to stop doing that, what is he doing?"

I thought he was "testing" something, and I thought the sound worried him, so he was reproducing it over and over. In reality he didn't know how to get the key out of the ignition because he'd never driven a car before, but he'd already lied to my wife that he knew how to drive, and he was saving face by just continuing to audibly gently caress up and turn the key the wrong way until I finally reached in and stopped him. He made the engine rattle like six or seven times before I finally got him to stop.

My wife invited them inside to take some bullshit we couldn't sell from our moving sale. She went upstairs to get something so I tried to make smalltalk, but after I got one sentence out he interrupted me with "WOahhhhWWWWOWW you can speak-ah Chinese-ah???"

Once he did that I passive aggressively just nodded and went back to my laptop and ignored them.

My wife came back down and gave them a bunch of crap we didn't want. This included a 1 pound bag of salt. The guy said, "This is great, now we don't need to buy salt for a whole year!" She gave them frozen meat out of the fridge that we were going to throw away anyway, and he was like "Omg, you are such an angel, I can't believe how generous you are!"

My wife gave them so much stuff that she offered to drive them back to their apartment so they wouldn't have to take the bus. She had to get gas on the way and the guy says, "Oh, I want to see how you get gas in America."

My wife said, "Oh, it's just like in China."

And he she swipes her card and he asks, "You don't have to pay ahead of time?"

She says no and asked if he had to pay ahead of time in China, and his face-saving lie response was, "Oh, well, I usually just get other people to pump my gas for me, so I've never done it myself."

She got to their place and they insisted she go in even though she really didn't want to. She said when she got in, it smelled so bad that she almost vomited and she tried to get out as fast as she could.

I was really proud of her when she told me about the salt thing and said, "One pound of salt is just like 80 cents, why would he be so happy about that??"

Why not ask for his license??

# ? Apr 28, 2017 04:23

caberham: Mar 18, 2009; by Smythe; Grimey Drawer

Whoops. Well it's ok to be condescending when he has trouble parking the car

# ? Apr 28, 2017 04:26

Blistex: Oct 30, 2003; Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

caberham posted:

Whoops. Well it's ok to be condescending when he has trouble parking the car

I parked a car for a lady in Shenyang who had no concept of moving an entire car over one foot to the left/right. My wife and I watched her keep the wheel jammed to the right, and go four feet ahead and back over and over for 5 minutes. My wife asked if she needed help, and she assumed that my wife was going to drive it, and stood mouth agape when I hopped in and parked it for her. The 15 people just watching this unfold were all flabbergasted, and a few of them came up to me and slapped me on the shoulder and told me that I park really well. It's like all the movies and shows they watch portraying white people driving are all CGI or something, and naturally only Chinese people can drive.

Another time I saw a lady in a Porsche Cayenne destroy about 5-6 cars trying to park.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 04:36

Jimmy Little Balls: Aug 23, 2009

When I was really sick once I saw a guy reverse straight into a parking space, no back and forth 50 times, no team of people guiding him in, not doing it at 1mm per hour, just perfectly reverse into a parking space. I thought I'd started hallucinating but then a white guy got out of the car.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 04:49

Brutal Garcon: Nov 2, 2014

ntan1 posted:

My Chinrar experience is kind short and boring, but...

I work for <insert famous American successful company here> and for some reason randomly a couple of people who go to the restroom using a urinal feel the need to fully pull down their shorts so that it exposes their butt while peeing. In my experience, they always seem like they come from China.

I've heard from reliable sources that it feels good, man.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 04:53

LentThem: Aug 31, 2004; 90% Retractible

ntan1 posted:

I work for <insert famous American successful company here> and for some reason randomly a couple of people who go to the restroom using a urinal feel the need to fully pull down their shorts so that it exposes their butt while peeing. In my experience, they always seem like they come from China.

feels good man

But yeah I actually saw the same complaint from a guy at a major US tech company that hires a lot of Chinese people (on visas) for that office.

Where I work (Shanghai) most people seem to be afraid to touch their junk, so they'll
-Unbelt their pants and hold them almost to the knees with one or both hands
-Use the other hand or their chin to hold up or hold back their shirt
-Arch their hips away from the toilet to avoid splashback from the next step >>>
-Push really hard while peeing so that you can get it into the urinal hands-free

You'd think that using toilets and urinals multiple times a day for most of your life, you'd have worked out a system that doesnt involve a bunch of awkward disrobing, splashing, and urine puddles.

Like seriously guys there are ways to hold up your dick without touching it directly if thats goign to be your requirement. Or hey there's a sink 4 steps behind you with soap, maybe use a little of that first and then get your hands on there instead of being a sissy baby

# ? Apr 28, 2017 04:54

Blistex: Oct 30, 2003; Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

Jimmy Little Balls posted:

When I was really sick once I saw a guy reverse straight into a parking space, no back and forth 50 times, no team of people guiding him in, not doing it at 1mm per hour, just perfectly reverse into a parking space. I thought I'd started hallucinating but then a white guy got out of the car.

This one guy I knew in Shenyang was an American who licensed a few factories to make laminate flooring and oil pipeline fittings. He had a massive Chevy Suburban that he had shipped over from the US. It was literally the largest thing I saw on the roads in China that wasn't hauling gravel or carrying 50 passengers. He had to plan his day out whenever he drove anywhere because it was impossible to park it in 99% of the typical parking spots you would find in front of restaurants, offices, or apartments, so sometimes he would actually have to take a cab from where he parked it to where he needed to be. At his place he had to pay for three spots so that he could park it diagonally across all of them. He had a "driver" whose entire job was to basically guard it so that people wouldn't smash into it in parking lots and on the sides of the road. Even though the American spoke more than fluent Mandarin, his driver spoke decent English, and said that he hated driving it in the city because it was nearly impossible to go anywhere but main roads and highways.

The owner said that it was worth all of the trouble and money, because it was +10 to his face standing, since nobody else had ever seen one in China, and they were impressed that you could have 8 passenger seating in it, and all of the seats were leather.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 05:18

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Only 1/5 chance for Hep B in these lovely Chinese counties.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 05:30

Yorkshire Pudding: Nov 24, 2006

So plunge 4 girls from each county, badda bing badda boom no hep.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 05:41

WarpedNaba: Feb 8, 2012; Being social makes me swell!

JaucheCharly posted:

Don't worry, the kid got the best TCM treatment.

What part of not getting hurt does that cover?

# ? Apr 28, 2017 06:37

Accretionist: Nov 7, 2012; I BELIEVE IN STUPID CONSPIRACY THEORIES

Haier posted:

Only 1/5 chance for Hep B in these lovely Chinese counties.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 06:47

WarpedNaba: Feb 8, 2012; Being social makes me swell!

Haier posted:

Only 1/5 chance for Hep B in these lovely Chinese counties.

You've basically got walking 鬼佬 syndrome by this point.

Dibs on his laptop!

# ? Apr 28, 2017 06:53

Power Khan: Aug 20, 2011; by Fritz the Horse

angel opportunity posted:

"Omg, you are such an angel"

Lol, great.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 06:57

LentThem: Aug 31, 2004; 90% Retractible

so is that hep chart for humans or for livestock

# ? Apr 28, 2017 07:05

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

LentThem posted:

so is that hep chart for humans or for livestock

human livestock

# ? Apr 28, 2017 07:32

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

LentThem posted:

so is that hep chart for humans or for livestock

Hoo-mans. It was from a series of cancer-rate data charts based on diet. There are some vegan towns in China, and some towns where they eat up to 135gms of protein from animal sources per day. They both got a lot of cancer, but just different kinds. I think a lot of it was more environmental, since going on diet alone from Chinese people is like using sewer rats for controlled studies instead of lab rats.

https://deniseminger.com/2010/07/07/the-china-study-fact-or-fallac/

This article was defeating the book "The China Study" which was written about how HEALTHY Chinese people are and said it was because of their diet. The girl that wrote this article after the research got a book deal out of it, and made a much more researched attempt on other topics. She found that the USDA Food Pyramid was altered from the original proposal by nutritionists to reflect the grain-feed industry's profits (basically double the amount of carbs than was proposed).

5 days in China is more than enough to prove that The China Study is bullshit.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 07:34

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

I wanna gripe about something different.

A new Indian restaurant opened recently here and the prices aren't too bad (compared to the sit-down restaurants). They sell a tray of food, kinda like a fixed thali but less, and one price gets you the tray with some roti. For Chinese people it is probably a lot of food, but for me (or any visiting Indian), it is not. It is cooked and run by actual Indians (and I think the owner is married to a Chinese woman), and so it is real Indian food done in the Indian way. At the same time, it is Indian service in the Indian way, which is not going to fly with the Chinese, Westerners, or probably other Indians who have made it out of India. I think they don't even bother to cater to the Chinese, since there are so many Indians and Pakistanis in the area for business.
I've told three Chinese friends to try eating there, and all complained of impossibly slow service, but the main thing was "It is too spicy!" This means it's medium or mild in terms of Indian food, but impossible for a Chinese to accept (I remember getting the same complaint for my cooking when I squeezed a lemon on something).

Anyway, they list their hours everywhere and the times I have wanted to eat there they either told me to come back later when they were ready (1-2 hours past when they open), or were already out of food long before the meal times were over. They are new, so I kinda get it, but I don't know who is going to be eating there if Chinese can't handle it, and they have nothing for customers who do come. I'll give it some time, but by then they might already be out of business.

I guess I have to wait until India to get some real-deal stuff. I walked into another Indian restaurant in the area, and walked back out when I saw a simple subzi was 60 RMB a bowl and they wanted 20+ for a single naan.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 07:51

caberham: Mar 18, 2009; by Smythe; Grimey Drawer

Where's the new restaurant and what is it called?

# ? Apr 28, 2017 08:40

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Haier posted:

60 RMB a bowl and they wanted 20+ for a single naan.

Can I just divide these numbers by 6, rounding down and end up somewhere close to USD?

# ? Apr 28, 2017 08:49

Imperialist Dog: Oct 21, 2008; "I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\

Instead of gutter oil they use ganges water

# ? Apr 28, 2017 08:49

hakimashou: Jul 15, 2002; Upset Trowel

There used to be a good Indian restaurant in Zhuhai that I'd go to whenever I was in town, it was run by real Indians I think.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 08:57

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

caberham posted:

Where's the new restaurant and what is it called?

Huaqiang Bei metro station exit C, name is "Namaste." It's vegetarian. It's on the side of one of the buildings there, ground floor, and you can't see it from the street. I don't know the proper address and Guge gives me nothing.

Edit: You're in HK. Just go to Indian town and get all the cheap food there. WTH

Beachcomber posted:

Can I just divide these numbers by 6, rounding down and end up somewhere close to USD?

It's nearly 7 now.
60 RMB = $8.70
20 RMB = $2.90

That doesn't sound bad for US prices, I guess, but I am not in the US and don't appreciate that mark up, and will be in India later this year anyway.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:10

caberham: Mar 18, 2009; by Smythe; Grimey Drawer

Haier posted:

Huaqiang Bei metro station exit C, name is "Namaste." It's vegetarian. It's on the side of one of the buildings there, ground floor, and you can't see it from the street. I don't know the proper address and Guge gives me nothing.

Edit: You're in HK. Just go to Indian town and get all the cheap food there. WTH

It's nearly 7 now.
60 RMB = $8.70
20 RMB = $2.90

That doesn't sound bad for US prices, I guess, but I am not in the US and don't appreciate that mark up, and will be in India later this year anyway.

I'm always in Shenzhen and have friends in Shenzhen who like Indian food

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:13

Imperialist Dog: Oct 21, 2008; "I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\

We have an Indian Town in HK? Is it TST or Chungking Mansions?

Also Cabe is always in China so this stuff is good to know

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:18

caberham: Mar 18, 2009; by Smythe; Grimey Drawer

Imperialist Dog posted:

We have an Indian Town in HK? Is it TST or Chungking Mansions?

Also Cabe is always in China so this stuff is good to know

And fart is in Shenzhen.

I normally eat here for Sunday Brunch. A few of my rich Indian friends go there. It's a buffet with all you can drink lassi

http://www.diningconcepts.com/restaurants/Bombay-Dreams

Dinner gets pricey but it's a good place

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:19

Imperialist Dog: Oct 21, 2008; "I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\

Huh they're an AsiaMiles affiliate. My wife made me sign up for that when I first arrived in HK and I'm yet to earn any points ...

drat that's a bit expensive but the choices look amazing and now I'm hungry

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:40

hakimashou: Jul 15, 2002; Upset Trowel

I miss HK dining, so many amazing restaurants.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:54

caberham: Mar 18, 2009; by Smythe; Grimey Drawer

Imperialist Dog posted:

Huh they're an AsiaMiles affiliate. My wife made me sign up for that when I first arrived in HK and I'm yet to earn any points ...

drat that's a bit expensive but the choices look amazing and now I'm hungry

Just go for the lunch buffets, it's only 220 and all you can drink lassi. A lassi normally goes for 50 bucks if you can drink 3 you get your value!

Oh I still haven't tried the Sri Lankan restaurant in Sheung Wan

https://www.openrice.com/en/hongkong/r-serendib-sheung-wan-sri-lanka-curry-r515108

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:56

LentThem: Aug 31, 2004; 90% Retractible

LentThem posted:

feels good man

But yeah I actually saw the same complaint from a guy at a major US tech company that hires a lot of Chinese people (on visas) for that office.

Where I work (Shanghai) most people seem to be afraid to touch their junk, so they'll
-Unbelt their pants and hold them almost to the knees with one or both hands
-Use the other hand or their chin to hold up or hold back their shirt
-Arch their hips away from the toilet to avoid splashback from the next step >>>
-Push really hard while peeing so that you can get it into the urinal hands-free

You'd think that using toilets and urinals multiple times a day for most of your life, you'd have worked out a system that doesnt involve a bunch of awkward disrobing, splashing, and urine puddles.

Like seriously guys there are ways to hold up your dick without touching it directly if thats goign to be your requirement. Or hey there's a sink 4 steps behind you with soap, maybe use a little of that first and then get your hands on there instead of being a sissy baby

Updating with a new urinal story from today
A guy comes in wearing an unzipped hoodie and takes the urinal next to me when the entire row is empty. He undoes his pants and belt and then places both hands on his hips superman-style to hold back the flaps of the hoodie, then just pushes really hard hands-free to pee

also just LOL at 20rmb for one naan. I mean im sure Shanghai costs even more, but a loving naan doesnt deserve that price. I do wonder who the target audience is for expensive-but-not-high-end indian food in China. The indians in shanghai don't get paid that much (mayyybe more than locals but it's all call-center or IT vendor jobs so maybe not) so they arent really buying it, and most chinese people absolutely hate it.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 09:58

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Imperialist Dog posted:

We have an Indian Town in HK? Is it TST or Chungking Mansions?

Also Cabe is always in China so this stuff is good to know

Chungking Mansions. I just call it India Town. There are other places around there that sell Indian food for low prices, more than sweets.

caberham posted:

And fart is in Shenzhen.

I normally eat here for Sunday Brunch. A few of my rich Indian friends go there. It's a buffet with all you can drink lassi

http://www.diningconcepts.com/restaurants/Bombay-Dreams

Dinner gets pricey but it's a good place

Shenzhen doesn't have poo poo.

"Bombay Dreams." Having been to Bombay, I would prefer to say it has only been in nightmares and not dreams. Even Indians aren't willing to dream about it. A quip from an Indian friend who had to go for work often was "You want to imagine Hell, but then think of a place more filthy and polluted and crowded and unsafe than Hell, and then you get Mumbai."
The prices on that menu are high, even for outside of India. $30 USD for a dish is wow. I guess they have to pay rent somehow.

Personally, I am just going to wait the few months until I get there and can live it up. The average Indian city also has much more international foods than the average Chinese megacity, in my experience. Indian at least like to try eating different things rather than find some way to insult themselves and get hurt feelings over the idea that things are different (Mainlanders). One of the entrees at restaurants here would pay for me and four-seven friends for an all-you-can-eat thali at an upscale restaurant in a tier-2 city in India. I can be patient.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 10:00

LentThem: Aug 31, 2004; 90% Retractible

caberham posted:

And fart is in Shenzhen.

I normally eat here for Sunday Brunch. A few of my rich Indian friends go there. It's a buffet with all you can drink lassi

http://www.diningconcepts.com/restaurants/Bombay-Dreams

Dinner gets pricey but it's a good place

http://www.dianping.com/shop/2428165/photos/album

Mainland Link for Mainland Goons

from my short time in india i discovered that indians looooove buffet

# ? Apr 28, 2017 10:03

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Forgot to crosspost

# ? Apr 28, 2017 10:06

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Oh yeah, I wanted to post this last week and will do so before I forget:

*Going down on the Mongol after we had met outside for a walk earlier. We hadn't met in about 5 months*
Her: "I love you. I love you. I love youuuu."
*Ignoring it because it's really weird and she seems to barely remember anything about me from last time*

Later...
Her: *Complaining about her job*
Me: "So, why did you say you love me?"
Her: "I don't love you, I never said that."
Me: "You did, just a bit ago."
Her: "I didn't."
Me: "You totally did!" *imitates her*
Her: "Oh. I wasn't talking to you."
Me: "Whaaaaat? Who were you talking to???"
Her: "The man I am in love with. I wasn't paying attention to you."
Me: "Yo, what the gently caress? I don't like that all. If you love some dude, go to him. Don't waste my time."
Her: "He lives far away!"
Me: "It's time for you to go home."
Her: "I will go in 30 minutes, I want to look at something on my phone."
Me: "No, you can do that at home."

*After she's dressed, she plops down on my floor*
Her: "I miss my parents."
Me: "I don't care."
Her: "I am so lonely."
Me: "Go be lonely outside of my house."
Her: "Why are you so rude!!!"

# ? Apr 28, 2017 10:14

LentThem: Aug 31, 2004; 90% Retractible

Haier posted:

"Bombay Dreams." Having been to Bombay, I would prefer to say it has only been in nightmares and not dreams. Even Indians aren't willing to dream about it. A quip from an Indian friend who had to go for work often was "You want to imagine Hell, but then think of a place more filthy and polluted and crowded and unsafe than Hell, and then you get Mumbai."
The prices on that menu are high, even for outside of India. $30 USD for a dish is wow. I guess they have to pay rent somehow.

I looked at that price list and was thinking "hm, slightly cheaper than Shanghai..."
im absolutely hosed living here

delhi food was a sloppy tasty mess

# ? Apr 28, 2017 10:23

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Jimmy Little Balls posted:

When I was really sick once I saw a guy reverse straight into a parking space, no back and forth 50 times, no team of people guiding him in, not doing it at 1mm per hour, just perfectly reverse into a parking space. I thought I'd started hallucinating but then a white guy got out of the car.

lol at the surprise ending

# ? Apr 28, 2017 10:23

BONGHITZ: Jan 1, 1970

Back and Forth again: A plunger's tale

# ? Apr 28, 2017 11:17

Pirate Radar: Apr 18, 2008; You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Geez, Haier. I don't know what the conversion is between Maobucks and Chiang Kai-Shekels but over here I only have to pay like NT$60, I want to say, for a naan? The lunch specials at the place near my office are NT$100-150.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 11:33

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# ? May 29, 2024 19:52

Let us English: Feb 21, 2004; Actual photo of Let Us English, probably seen here waking his wife up in the morning talking about chemical formulae when all she wants is a hot cup of shhhhh

Haier posted:

Hoo-mans. It was from a series of cancer-rate data charts based on diet. There are some vegan towns in China, and some towns where they eat up to 135gms of protein from animal sources per day. They both got a lot of cancer, but just different kinds. I think a lot of it was more environmental, since going on diet alone from Chinese people is like using sewer rats for controlled studies instead of lab rats.

https://deniseminger.com/2010/07/07/the-china-study-fact-or-fallac/

This article was defeating the book "The China Study" which was written about how HEALTHY Chinese people are and said it was because of their diet. The girl that wrote this article after the research got a book deal out of it, and made a much more researched attempt on other topics. She found that the USDA Food Pyramid was altered from the original proposal by nutritionists to reflect the grain-feed industry's profits (basically double the amount of carbs than was proposed).

5 days in China is more than enough to prove that The China Study is bullshit.

Denise Minger does awesome statistical analyses of public health data. Her book Death by Food Pyramid is a little dry but it's also an amazing look at the history not the American diet.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 11:59

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