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Executed for trying to draft doge WWIII by pretending to be a bad hombre so I can get deported instead.
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Apr 14, 2017 02:20
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Was found not guilty at trial but judge misclicked on tablet and accidentally picked "Hobby Lobby© presents Deluxe Death".
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Apr 14, 2017 02:24
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Gassed my citizens after Russia decided I wasn't a useful ally anymore.
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Apr 14, 2017 03:16
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On every retweet of that dude trying to get free chicken nuggets from Wendy's, I tweeted "if Trump denies science so much does he deny dementia and Alzheimer's are real?"
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Apr 14, 2017 23:15
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Asked Trump if I could be VP if I got 18 million RT's. Killed by Mike Pence when he said yes.
Michael Corleone has issued a correction as of 11:49 on Apr 15, 2017 |
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Apr 15, 2017 11:47
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I don't know, I'm just a normal citizen in Seoul
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Apr 15, 2017 14:59
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Compared Trump collapsing the USFL because he wanted to go head to head with the NFL with him wanting to go head to head with North Korea and what that may entail. Lack of faith did me in 
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Apr 19, 2017 18:14
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Picked the wrong side in the Cola Wars
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Apr 23, 2017 05:22
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Wiki leaked 30gb archive of ivanka feet pics.
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Apr 23, 2017 16:18
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Masturbated to Ivanka feet pics.
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Apr 23, 2017 16:26
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change my name posted:I don't know, I'm just a normal citizen in Seoul You are still granted limited voting rights and are subject to summary execution.
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Apr 23, 2017 16:35
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Didn't vote for le Pen despite never having spent a second of my life in France.
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Apr 23, 2017 23:05
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MizPiz posted:Masturbated to Ivanka feet pics. Didn't masturbate to Ivanka feet pics
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Apr 24, 2017 00:40
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Called Mike Pence a homosexual koala enthusiast
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Apr 24, 2017 01:04
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didn't type trump trumnp trum trump trump trump frequently enough
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Apr 24, 2017 06:05
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Wrong generational cohort
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Apr 24, 2017 06:09
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knew what early onset dementia was
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Apr 24, 2017 22:32
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didn't feverishly deny that the president has a shameful rear end
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Apr 25, 2017 04:32
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A little too into president's shameful rear end
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Apr 25, 2017 07:15
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Got spray tanned the wrong shade of orange
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Apr 26, 2017 17:38
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Publicly made fun of Ivanka for endorsing that stupid loving wifi juicer
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Apr 27, 2017 00:38
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wanted the wall
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Apr 27, 2017 02:16
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disagreement on war strategy, in addition to, being too insistent about collecting my defense contract money without cutting trump in
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Apr 28, 2017 10:17
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tried to teach constitution to street urchins
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Apr 29, 2017 01:32
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C. Everett Koop posted:wasn't executed, but got stuck in an airport without a valid visa and starved to death
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Apr 29, 2017 04:40
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tried to out-pizza the hut
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Apr 29, 2017 21:55
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Stole Trump's personal stash of Ivanka feet pics, and leaked them to the public. Punishment: Rendered into Soylent.
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Apr 29, 2017 23:03
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Went to Harrisburg, PA with the intention of protesting Trump. Was shot. Because Harrisburg.
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Apr 30, 2017 03:34
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Totally melted off the face of the earth when Trump accidentally hit the button on his desk for the nukes instead of the one that orders Coke
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Apr 30, 2017 03:39
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clapped for jeb
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Apr 30, 2017 07:20
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Was a Marlins fan.
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Apr 30, 2017 11:27
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Ordered a steak done instead of well done slathered in ketchup.
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Apr 30, 2017 12:19
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protested when told that i didnt need to do that cuz its jareds job
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Apr 30, 2017 13:36
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NSA history found that I had watched the very sad dishonest 2017 Not the White House Press dinner stream.
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Apr 30, 2017 13:56
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Shrieking Muppet posted:Ordered a steak done instead of well done slathered in ketchup. You still deserved it you cretin
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Apr 30, 2017 14:30
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My whitehouse.gov petition asking for mandatory partitions between urinals got too popular
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Apr 30, 2017 15:24
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change my name posted:My whitehouse.gov petition asking for mandatory partitions between urinals got too popular Executed by the Splash Guard
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Apr 30, 2017 15:25
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Trumpstaffel found glass turtles in pocket during a search
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Apr 30, 2017 15:41
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mrbradlymrmartin posted:Executed by the Yellow Guard
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Apr 30, 2017 17:14
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Said we should take the stairs.
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Apr 30, 2017 18:38
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