SWOLECEPTION: lift big eat big shit big

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > SWOLECEPTION: lift big eat big shit big

Dilber: Mar 27, 2007; TFLC
_{_{(Trophy Feline Lifting Crew)}}

TheTremendous posted:

"What should I use in my intraworkout shake if I don't want to use sugar or carbs?"

Here are quotes:

"How do you guys combine IF with RP?"

"I bought a cut template for myself and I'm around 120 lbs. My husband is interested in starting as well. He weighs 160ish. Does he need a different template? I'm not sure how the weight categories break down or if gender makes a big enough difference to require a different template."

"I'm sorry if this has been answered previously. I couldnt find it. Does it mater if I use powdered gatorade or liquid?"

"Who converts their template to just straight macros and does IIFYM at each meal? Either cut or mass."

also, a bunch of crossfitters asking if their 20 min WOD counts as hard because it feeeeels haaaaard.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 19:18

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# ? May 12, 2024 23:43

TheTremendous: Jan 4, 2013

Dilber posted:

Here are quotes:

"How do you guys combine IF with RP?"

"I bought a cut template for myself and I'm around 120 lbs. My husband is interested in starting as well. He weighs 160ish. Does he need a different template? I'm not sure how the weight categories break down or if gender makes a big enough difference to require a different template."

"I'm sorry if this has been answered previously. I couldnt find it. Does it mater if I use powdered gatorade or liquid?"

"Who converts their template to just straight macros and does IIFYM at each meal? Either cut or mass."

also, a bunch of crossfitters asking if their 20 min WOD counts as hard because it feeeeels haaaaard.

The crossfit questions will never stop. It was pretty bad last year, but group membership has tripled since then IIRC. People who use coconut water for their intra shakes but complain about the volume might be my favorite.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 19:37

Dum Cumpster: Sep 12, 2003; *pozes your neghole*

Before they said to stop making mean comments I was thinking about posting something along the lines of when are you guys going to offer RP Remedial that just teaches fractions and algebra.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 19:44

a mysterious cloak: Apr 5, 2003; Leave me alone, dad, I'm with my friends!

Yeah that group is hilariously bad sometimes. Especially when they make things way too complicated.

TheTremendous posted:

People who use coconut water for their intra shakes but complain about the volume might be my favorite.

Wtf I hadn't seen that, are they drinking like a gallon per workout? drat.

a mysterious cloak fucked around with this message at 19:56 on Apr 27, 2017

# ? Apr 27, 2017 19:51

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

a mysterious cloak posted:

Yeah that group is hilariously bad sometimes. Especially when they make things way too complicated.

Agreed, nothing like our perfectly adjusted, non fart huffing high concept discussion here in GBS

# ? Apr 27, 2017 19:53

Dilber: Mar 27, 2007; TFLC
_{_{(Trophy Feline Lifting Crew)}}

Dum Cumpster posted:

Before they said to stop making mean comments I was thinking about posting something along the lines of when are you guys going to offer RP Remedial that just teaches fractions and algebra.

RPStrong is the group where you make comments like that towards RPclients.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 19:56

Zev: Apr 3, 2009

So does the diet book give you all the tools to make your own spreadsheet? I don't understand why there are two different products. It seems like the spreadsheets are stand alone stuff. Do they have like proprietary formulas and then just send you the data it spits out?

# ? Apr 27, 2017 20:36

Risky Bisquick: Jan 18, 2008; PLEASE LET ME WRITE YOUR VICTIM IMPACT STATEMENT SO I CAN FURTHER DEMONSTRATE THE CALAMITY THAT IS OUR JUSTICE SYSTEM.; Buglord

There would probably be an overlap of people that can't figure out spreadsheets and people that do fitness, so selling a working spreadsheet or plan would be turn key for these people.

It would also save some time

# ? Apr 27, 2017 20:43

Dum Cumpster: Sep 12, 2003; *pozes your neghole*

Zev posted:

So does the diet book give you all the tools to make your own spreadsheet? I don't understand why there are two different products. It seems like the spreadsheets are stand alone stuff. Do they have like proprietary formulas and then just send you the data it spits out?

It gives you everything you need. I'm just lazy/busy/stupid

# ? Apr 27, 2017 20:59

IronClaymore: Jun 30, 2010; by Athanatos

Isn't...isn't the purpose of working out to get away from maths and spreadsheets and poo poo?

Because there are two rules for me, two absolute non-negotiable rules for working out or running or exercise in general:
1 - It's not a chore. You don't do it because you have to, you do it because you want to. It HAS to be something you look forward to. A joy to move (it...doesn't really sink in unless you've worked with a lot of disabled people, how fun it is just move around and work out). Because you don't stop. This is what you'll be doing for the rest of your life, you have to maintain your gains.
2 - You're not competing with anyone. You're not trying to be skinnier or stronger or faster than anyone, except your past self.

Plans are fine, as long as they're simple. But 90% of it all is just cutting out lovely snacks and making a tiny bit of time to devote to doing something to improve yourself. Not a gym membership you do once and never follow up on, but a few minutes of yoga and a couple of core exercises stolen from pilates, a couple of times a week, it can start from there.

Sorry. Been going to a D&D group this past few weeks. Yep, the demographic of this bunch is the usual cliche. And perfect motivation - "Don't let me be like that!"

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:08

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Hnnnnnnngh

https://instagram.com/p/BTZqi5aAvVK/

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:08

Chinatown: Sep 11, 2001; by Fluffdaddy; Fun Shoe

keep talking about diet spreadsheets and im closing this thread

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:16

Gorman Thomas: Jul 24, 2007

FizFashizzle posted:

Hnnnnnnngh

https://instagram.com/p/BTZqi5aAvVK/

big lifts big life

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:17

Dum Cumpster: Sep 12, 2003; *pozes your neghole*

Chinatown posted:

keep talking about diet spreadsheets and im closing this thread

lol good

IronClaymore posted:

Isn't...isn't the purpose of working out to get away from maths and spreadsheets and poo poo?

Because there are two rules for me, two absolute non-negotiable rules for working out or running or exercise in general:
1 - It's not a chore. You don't do it because you have to, you do it because you want to. It HAS to be something you look forward to. A joy to move (it...doesn't really sink in unless you've worked with a lot of disabled people, how fun it is just move around and work out). Because you don't stop. This is what you'll be doing for the rest of your life, you have to maintain your gains.
2 - You're not competing with anyone. You're not trying to be skinnier or stronger or faster than anyone, except your past self.

Plans are fine, as long as they're simple. But 90% of it all is just cutting out lovely snacks and making a tiny bit of time to devote to doing something to improve yourself. Not a gym membership you do once and never follow up on, but a few minutes of yoga and a couple of core exercises stolen from pilates, a couple of times a week, it can start from there.

Sorry. Been going to a D&D group this past few weeks. Yep, the demographic of this bunch is the usual cliche. And perfect motivation - "Don't let me be like that!"

An extra 20 minutes of effort a day (and a one time $100 donation) will get me way better results to show my past self who's boss. And "just cut out the lovely snacks" stopped working like 5 years ago.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:19

IronClaymore: Jun 30, 2010; by Athanatos

Dum Cumpster posted:

lol good

An extra 20 minutes of effort a day (and a one time $100 donation) will get me way better results to show my past self who's boss. And "just cut out the lovely snacks" stopped working like 5 years ago.

I'm going for low hanging (in some cases VERY low hanging) fruit here. The...the eating habits...my god the eating habits! Is this what being a geek has come to? I didn't know men could even get cellulite...on their stomachs...that poke out of even XX-large shirts.

It is scary. I do not want that. I will die before I become that.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:34

Fallows: Jan 20, 2005; If he waits long enough he can use his accrued interest from his savings to bring his negative checking balance back into the black.

IronClaymore posted:

Isn't...isn't the purpose of working out to get away from maths and spreadsheets and poo poo?

Because there are two rules for me, two absolute non-negotiable rules for working out or running or exercise in general:
1 - It's not a chore. You don't do it because you have to, you do it because you want to. It HAS to be something you look forward to. A joy to move (it...doesn't really sink in unless you've worked with a lot of disabled people, how fun it is just move around and work out). Because you don't stop. This is what you'll be doing for the rest of your life, you have to maintain your gains.
2 - You're not competing with anyone. You're not trying to be skinnier or stronger or faster than anyone, except your past self.

Plans are fine, as long as they're simple. But 90% of it all is just cutting out lovely snacks and making a tiny bit of time to devote to doing something to improve yourself. Not a gym membership you do once and never follow up on, but a few minutes of yoga and a couple of core exercises stolen from pilates, a couple of times a week, it can start from there.

Sorry. Been going to a D&D group this past few weeks. Yep, the demographic of this bunch is the usual cliche. And perfect motivation - "Don't let me be like that!"

I enjoy my 531 spreadsheet more than I do the actual lifts and now that I am doing hypertrophy for a few months and not that I feel a giant void in my lifting life. Also if I can see you I am competing with you

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:35

UnfurledSails: Sep 1, 2011

I got the RP coaching thing last January and it was great for me. I stuck with the diet and workouts about 2/3 of the time but according to DEXA I lost about 2 pounds of fat and gained 6 pounds of lean muscle, dropping to under 20 percent fat for the first time in my life. Switched goals from a cut to a bulk halfway through at the suggestion of my coach. Got another 3 months and am sticking to it 100 percent now, especially since I got the hang of meal prepping for the week.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:44

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

IronClaymore posted:

Isn't...isn't the purpose of working out to get away from maths and spreadsheets and poo poo?

Because there are two rules for me, two absolute non-negotiable rules for working out or running or exercise in general:
1 - It's not a chore. You don't do it because you have to, you do it because you want to. It HAS to be something you look forward to. A joy to move (it...doesn't really sink in unless you've worked with a lot of disabled people, how fun it is just move around and work out). Because you don't stop. This is what you'll be doing for the rest of your life, you have to maintain your gains.
2 - You're not competing with anyone. You're not trying to be skinnier or stronger or faster than anyone, except your past self.

Plans are fine, as long as they're simple. But 90% of it all is just cutting out lovely snacks and making a tiny bit of time to devote to doing something to improve yourself. Not a gym membership you do once and never follow up on, but a few minutes of yoga and a couple of core exercises stolen from pilates, a couple of times a week, it can start from there.

Sorry. Been going to a D&D group this past few weeks. Yep, the demographic of this bunch is the usual cliche. And perfect motivation - "Don't let me be like that!"

I'm shaking my head a lot at this

sassassin fucked around with this message at 21:45 on Apr 27, 2017

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:43

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

UnfurledSails posted:

I got the RP coaching thing last January and it was great for me. I stuck with the diet and workouts about 2/3 of the time but according to DEXA I lost about 2 pounds of fat and gained 6 pounds of lean muscle, dropping to under 20 percent fat for the first time in my life. Switched goals from a cut to a bulk halfway through at the suggestion of my coach. Got another 3 months and am sticking to it 100 percent now, especially since I got the hang of meal prepping for the week.

You're just under 20% bf and your coach told you to bulk?

God drat

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:45

Thesaurus: Oct 3, 2004

a well fed client is a happy/repeat client

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:47

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

Started following hot chicks on instagrongs to get inspired

Now more depressed than ever because I'll never get with one of these hotties

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:57

UnfurledSails: Sep 1, 2011

sassassin posted:

You're just under 20% bf and your coach told you to bulk?

God drat

lol yeah I know but it's a very conservative bulk and I don't really have any muscle to cut down to. If I'm going to look shittier before I look better I'd rather look poo poo while not being hungry as hell.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 21:58

IronClaymore: Jun 30, 2010; by Athanatos

Fallows posted:

I enjoy my 531 spreadsheet more than I do the actual lifts and now that I am doing hypertrophy for a few months and not that I feel a giant void in my lifting life. Also if I can see you I am competing with you

sassassin posted:

I'm shaking my head a lot at this

This is why I don't work out at a gym.

I'd rather listen to metal and do free-weights at home.

And it is a joy. I'm in better shape than I was in high school, when I was a sports captain. I probably won't ever get swole. But maybe a little more toned. I could do with a touch more core work. And a bit more pecs. But there's no hurry. I know the core look could just come with me cutting out white rice and potatoes and stuff, but I like them too much, and it doesn't really matter.

If I work out enough, I can have all the stuff I like to eat, as long as I don't care about being super toned. Why would I care? It's the energy I get from it that matters the most. (Because OMFG I've been trying to get my lazy-rear end housemates into working out simply because of the energy it gives you!)

IronClaymore fucked around with this message at 22:09 on Apr 27, 2017

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:06

Thesaurus: Oct 3, 2004

gently caress conservative bulking. You need some far-left, full communism style bulking.

I actually day dream about bulking a lot... what would it feel like, the things I would eat... like a virgin daydreams about the feeling if being with a woman for the first time. In the same way, sometimes I get up the nerve at the store and I'm about to make my move on the captain crunch cereal and then I chicken out before sealing the deal

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:05

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

IronClaymore posted:

This is why I don't work out at a gym.

I'd rather listen to metal and do free-weights at home.

And it is a joy. I'm in better shape than I was in high school, when I was a sports captain. I probably won't ever get swole. But maybe a little more toned. I could do with a touch more core work. And a bit more pecs. But there's no hurry. I know the core look could just come with me cutting out white rice and potatoes and stuff, but I like them too much, and it doesn't really matter.

If I work out enough, I can have all the stuff I like to eat, as long as I don't care about being super toned. Why would I care? It's the energy I get from it that matters the most. (Because OMFG I've been trying to get my lazy-rear end housemates into working out simply because of the energy it gives you!)

Just lol if you're not competing with those around you at the gym

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:11

Dum Cumpster: Sep 12, 2003; *pozes your neghole*

IronClaymore posted:

This is why I don't work out at a gym.

I'd rather listen to metal and do free-weights at home.

And it is a joy. I'm in better shape than I was in high school, when I was a sports captain. I probably won't ever get swole. But maybe a little more toned. I could do with a touch more core work. And a bit more pecs. But there's no hurry. I know the core look could just come with me cutting out white rice and potatoes and stuff, but I like them too much, and it doesn't really matter.

If I work out enough, I can have all the stuff I like to eat, as long as I don't care about being super toned. Why would I care? It's the energy I get from it that matters the most. (Because OMFG I've been trying to get my lazy-rear end housemates into working out simply because of the energy it gives you!)

MY SPREADSHEETS enable me to eat nothing but white rice, potatoes, meat and veggies and lose weight

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:25

ham_sanitizer: Jul 12, 2014; professional swine bather

the purpose of lifting is to be stronger than other people so you can kill them for the last can of beans when we're living in the thunderdome

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:27

IronClaymore: Jun 30, 2010; by Athanatos

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

Just lol if you're not competing with those around you at the gym

Blame my upbringing! I was the least sporty of all the sports captains! I hated competing because I usually lost in anything but my sport.

If I want someone to compete against, all I have to look at are the photos of me at my sister's wedding 2 years ago. Man I was fat...my BMI was 25.5. Horrific.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:29

Dum Cumpster: Sep 12, 2003; *pozes your neghole*

IronClaymore posted:

Blame my upbringing! I was the least sporty of all the sports captains! I hated competing because I usually lost in anything but my sport.

If I want someone to compete against, all I have to look at are the photos of me at my sister's wedding 2 years ago. Man I was fat...my BMI was 25.5. Horrific.

We call that malnourished here in the midwest.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:30

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

ham_sanitizer posted:

the purpose of lifting is to be stronger than other people so you can kill them for the last can of beans when we're living in the thunderdome

Willing to eat human flesh to get my protein reqs post apocalypse

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:38

naem: May 29, 2011

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

Willing to eat human flesh to get my protein reqs post apocalypse

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:53

IronClaymore: Jun 30, 2010; by Athanatos

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

Willing to eat human flesh to get my protein reqs post apocalypse

How do you balance the neg sanity points you get from that though? Those stack up pretty fast. Not to mention the rads.

# ? Apr 27, 2017 22:57

Rodenthar Drothman: May 14, 2013; I think I will continue
watching this twilight world
as long as time flows.

Was a good arm day.

Wish I could finish it off with Burrito Curls.

# ? Apr 28, 2017 01:16

Fartbox: Apr 27, 2017; What's happening? Dri fu an only two? what is this?
Is this an avatar? I don't know rm dunk

What's in these autism-sheets? Do they tell you what to eat?

# ? Apr 28, 2017 07:05

Pesmerga: Aug 1, 2005; So nice to eat you

Thesaurus posted:

gently caress conservative bulking. You need some far-left, full communism style bulking.

I actually day dream about bulking a lot... what would it feel like, the things I would eat... like a virgin daydreams about the feeling if being with a woman for the first time. In the same way, sometimes I get up the nerve at the store and I'm about to make my move on the captain crunch cereal and then I chicken out before sealing the deal

Yes

Dum Cumpster posted:

MY SPREADSHEETS enable me to eat nothing but white rice, potatoes, meat and veggies and lose weight

How many ounces of salami is a spreadsheet?

# ? Apr 28, 2017 07:23

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

IronClaymore posted:

This is why I don't work out at a gym.

I'd rather listen to metal and do free-weights at home.

And it is a joy. I'm in better shape than I was in high school, when I was a sports captain. I probably won't ever get swole. But maybe a little more toned. I could do with a touch more core work. And a bit more pecs. But there's no hurry. I know the core look could just come with me cutting out white rice and potatoes and stuff, but I like them too much, and it doesn't really matter.

If I work out enough, I can have all the stuff I like to eat, as long as I don't care about being super toned. Why would I care? It's the energy I get from it that matters the most. (Because OMFG I've been trying to get my lazy-rear end housemates into working out simply because of the energy it gives you!)

Conflict is life, friend. If you hide away so that you never lose, you never win, either.

But there's no hurry in the ~~race~~ to become a little more toned, I guess. Why would you care?

# ? Apr 28, 2017 10:12

UnfurledSails: Sep 1, 2011

I did rack pulls for the first time and now my hands are useless lumps of meat. Weight was not really heavy but my grip strength sucks

# ? Apr 28, 2017 16:41

FogHelmut: Dec 18, 2003

Where can I get board shorts that fit my waist but also fit my rear end? Anything that's the right waist size is saran wrap on my crotch and thighs.

# ? Apr 29, 2017 22:14

Fartbox: Apr 27, 2017; What's happening? Dri fu an only two? what is this?
Is this an avatar? I don't know rm dunk

just wear kilts

# ? Apr 29, 2017 22:15

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# ? May 12, 2024 23:43

Rodenthar Drothman: May 14, 2013; I think I will continue
watching this twilight world
as long as time flows.

Display your saran-wrapped balls to the gym.

Assert dominance.

# ? Apr 29, 2017 22:19

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