Blue Train posted:

quote:

We met while I was interning at a well-known tech company. We've been together for 7 months now, and I love everything about our relationship. He's sweet and amazing in bed. We do nerdy things together like play Magic and videogames in addition to the typical nights out. We also both regularly workout during the week (he probably does much more than I do). Basically, we have good chemistry personality-wise and sexwise.

However, he's got kind of crummy eating habits. Every time we eat out, he gets something fatty and sweet. At first, I thought it was just because he was splurging because it was a date. But looking at his fridge, it is filled almost entirely of wine/beer, and weirdly, three bottles of Hershey's syrup. I do see him as someone I would spend years with, so I would like him to have as long a life with me as possible. I would like him to eat a little better, and I have cooked for him on several occasions.

And to be totally honest, I do have a shallow reason for him to diet. For reference, he's 6'2 and ~290 lbs and I'm 5'2 and ~100 lbs, and with the age difference, we definitely look like pedophile+pedobait. I would like that to be slightly less obvious
TL;DR Boyfriend works out, but eats crummy. How do I get him to fix his eating habits?

dudeness posted:

How do I (19F) tell my bf (29M) to eat better?

dudeness posted:

How do I (19F) tell my bf (29M) to eat better?

maskenfreiheit posted:

there was a guy my friend knew in grad school who lost a lot of weight by switching from beer to liquor

Haifisch posted:

The real way to lose weight is by drinking Soylent. Each body part that rots off from nutritional deficiency or heavy metal poisoning is at least 10 lbs lost!!

Pick posted:

Trop and I once went to a tiny anime convention with a "maid cafe" and oh man I can't do it justice, you need Trop to tell you that story

Haifisch posted:

The real way to lose weight is by drinking Soylent. Each body part that rots off from nutritional deficiency or heavy metal poisoning is at least 10 lbs lost!!

Troposphere posted:

I decided to check it out cause why not and it was just a poorly lit room full of fat nerds talking in anime voices dressed as maids and butlers sitting at a table eating dominos pizza it was gross

Troposphere posted:

I decided to check it out cause why not and it was just a poorly lit room full of fat nerds talking in anime voices dressed as maids and butlers sitting at a table eating dominos pizza it was gross

quote:

I don't really know where to start here. I understand how loving weird it all is. There's a big age gap between me and my sister. She's like 7 years older than me, and while we grew up together, and shared a room when I was really young, I wouldn't say we have ever been insanely close. At least I never felt that way. I don't know how to describe it. Obviously I love her, she's my sister, but I just don't feel a close connection with her really. When we talk we're always just acting like typical brother and sister, and none of this stuff here even really crosses my mind. So it doesn't affect my relationship with her at all.

Anyway, ever since my friends got to the age where they notice the opposite sex, they have always teased me for having a hot sister. I always tell them to shut up, and that it's disgusting cause it's my sister. But... Ugh, as horrible as it sounds, I can see where they're coming from. God that sounds weird. I would never do anything sexual with my sister. Not in a million years. I don't think I'm sexually attracted to her. But at the same time, I can't deny that she is physically attractive. From like an objective point of view. When my friends ask me the inevitable 'if she wasn't your sister, would you bang her?' I say no, obviously not, but there a part of me that honestly isn't sure.

Also, when we were younger I'm sure we kind of 'experimented' a bit if you want to call it that. My memory is foggy, but I'm sure we made out under the pretense of playing 'families' (I was the dad, her the mom). I don't know if me being really young it had an impact on me in some way. But I think this kind of thing is pretty common, so I don't know why it would have made such an impact.

Anyway, now while I can admit my sister is good looking, but I wouldn't do anything with her, I find myself really into incest porn. I find it a lot better than anything 'vanilla'. I don't know if it's the whole taboo nature of it, but I find it hot. I know I shouldn't, and honestly I feel disgusted with myself sometimes. I don't know if it links back to my real sister. The funny thing is, I don't think of her with these videos. Like I don't apply the fantasy to her. I'd never want that to happen, but I still find the whole idea really attractive. Anyway, do I need to get help or something for this? I'm 100% sure this isn't normal, and while it doesn't affect my daily life whatsoever, I still feel kinda weird when I sit and think about it all.

tl;dr: While I don't think I find my sister sexually attractive, I can see why others may think so. We kind of experimented a little when we were little, just kissing and stuff. Now I have a thing for incest porn, and while I understand it's kind of disgusting, I find it a lot better. Is there something wrong with me?

quote:

I have never been in a relationship, and never felt the need for one. There were guys who courted me, but I have only felt fearful, avoidant, and repulsed by such attempts. I have no problems being friends with males, but once they express a desire to move beyond a platonic relationship, I break off all ties.

I do find some males attractive, and I had several crushes in high school, but never once have I felt the need to date, sleep with, or have any form of romantic relationship with anyone. I never accept invites by male friends, single or not, to any kind of engagement outside of school or work.

Despite my resistance to rl guys, I have fantasies of being with fictional characters from anime, and I indulge in virtual games, manga, and anime to fulfil my need for intimacy. I have only ever imagined myself together with an anime character in romantic and sexual contexts, and real people just put me off.

Now that I'm 25 and fast approaching an age when I should be looking towards a committed relationship and marriage, I'm frequently questioned by curious family, relatives, friends, acquaintances, and pure strangers about my single status. Do I share with them what I said here, or will I be judged harshly for being unconventional (if that's the word)? Plus I am wondering how common my situation is. Anyone else experiences the same thing?
tl;dr: I am repulsed by real men, and only crave intimacy with fictional characters.

quote:

After my roommate Arnold and I had been living together for about a month, I realized a few things: 1. Arnold is messy 2. He likes to "decorate", but in a very slapdash ineffective way.

A few weeks ago, when Arnold noticed that I bought new clocks to hang on the walls in the house, he wanted to contribute to the decorating as well. He asked me if he could help, and I said "Sure, why not" and I didn't think anything of it.

He goes to his closet, and when he comes back he has these goddamn McDonald's toy Pokemon plush dolls, and a giant Pikachu piggy bank. He places them on top of the bookcase and says, "There! It looks a lot better now, right?" I say yes, through gritted teeth.

I think they make the whole room look tacky and horrible(not to mention the fact that I think it screams immaturity to any guest who visits), but I keep my mouth shut because I want to keep the peace.

Recently though, Arnold has been wanting to add more "decorations". He has a large collection of swords in his room that he's collected from various anime conventions that he's attended, and one of his friends noticed that the living room looked barren (In other words, clean. Or tidy. How it's loving supposed to look). So he suggested that he could have an "awesome-looking" sword display in the living room.
So one day, I come home and Arnold has already hung 8 swords along the wall. He's obviously very proud of the display, and he tells me how much of an improvement it is.

No. No loving way. Swords?? Hell no. People will think a psychopath lives here. I begrudgingly tell Arnold that it looks "fine", though.

I honestly don't know what to do at this point. Arnold has already told me that he plans on hanging some anime posters up in the living room as well. What if I want to bring a girl home? Or my parents? The living room is NOT a place for those things. He needs to keep that poo poo in his bedroom.

TL;DR Roommate wants swords and anime posters on display in the living room. I think they look tacky and frightening to any "normal" person who might walk into the house.

quote:

So I started seeing my therapist a few months ago and after the first session I decided I liked him and felt like I could trust him. We've recently been doing some work on my lack of assertiveness/ inability to call people out if they upset me because I'm scared of hurting their feelings.

I can't exactly remember how the conversation went but he suddenly said "can I be honest with you? And I hope you trust me enough to listen and not take this personally but from the moment I met you I could tell you were very vulnerable. I knew that if I wanted something more from you than a working relationship, I could have had it. You're in a vulnerable position here, I'm a man who's stronger than you and I could see your vulnerability, I knew you wouldn't say no"

First of all this pissed me off because obviously I would say no, I'm engaged and also am not about to gently caress my therapist regardless of my situation. Second of all I found it really creepy and unprofessional. I get the point he was trying to make, I just don't understand why he had to use that theoretical situation. Third of all, why the hell was he wondering whether he thinks he could take advantage of me or not in our first session?

Another important point is that I was raped in the past and he is fully aware of this. He brought it up and said "I can see how it happened, you didn't give him the right signals that you didn't want to have sex with him. By the way I'm in no way suggesting that it was your fault" I couldn't help but think that he totally was suggesting that and it really upset me. Also, that's not even true- my rapist was fully aware I did not want to sleep with him. I can't stop thinking about it but I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or not. Maybe I just didn't want to hear what he said so I'm thinking he's wrong to say those things when in actual fact he's just doing his job?

He's said other slightly weird things in the past that I've let go and assumed I was being oversensitive but I can't stop thinking about this.

TL:DR Therapist basically said he felt like he could gently caress me if he wanted and I probably wouldn't say no. Went on to hint that my rape was my fault. Do I sack him off?

Turtlicious posted:

I [18 M] have a thing for incest porn, and it makes me feel really awkward in regards to my sister [25 F]
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/4nnddv/i_18_m_have_a_thing_for_incest_porn_and_it_makes/

quote:

I (25F) only crave intimacy with anime characters
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/4rjo27/i_25f_only_crave_intimacy_with_anime_characters/

quote:

I'm (28F) not sure if what mt therapist (30sM) said to me is creepy and inappropriate
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/5qtdu2/im_28f_not_sure_if_what_mt_therapist_30sm_said_to/

quote:

Hello Reddit, I need some help and 9 times out of 10 you guys give good advice so here I am.

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years and I love him to pieces.

We have a few differences in lifestyle; I run half marathons, commit to eating healthily, am glued to my Fitbit and live for those days where I do treat myself with a pizza or KFC (usually twice a month). In the past 5 years I've gone from being 200lbs to 130lbs. I guess you could say I'm committed to having an active, healthy lifestyle but don't overdo it too much and still know when to let my hair down.

My boyfriend on the other hand is the opposite. He loves any unhealthy food and the only time he will ever really eat healthily is when I cook for us. The only sports he's into is esports and if he isn't at work he's either glued to his PC or we're watching Netflix together. He'll maybe do a 3k run once a month after I've urged him to but that's about it. Needless to say he's a bit overweight (by about 20lbs but nothing major, he looks perfectly fine).

The fact he's a little overweight is no big deal to me; he was when we met and I find him just as sexually attractive as I did the day we met, if not more to be honest. It's the fact that he's putting his health in jeopardy that terrifies the living poo poo out of me. This isn't a baseless comment of "oh if you're overweight you're UNHEALTHY" at all... this concern has come around most prominently in the past week or so.

This might be kinda gross and TMI but I'll keep it as clean as I can. He's had issues with his bowels for a while where he'll basically poop mucus. He refused to go to the doctors until I very strongly urged him to a few weeks ago. At first he thought it was IBS or coeliac but he's fine eating bread and pasta.

Turns out, through a low fibre, high fat diet (aka his diet 100%) he now has tumours on his colon that if left for too long, will become cancerous (he's getting them removed dw). When I found this out I was so shocked and offered to help him with his diet so he could get more fibre, good fats, protein and slow releasing carbs in to stop fuelling the fire. I figured being told you're at risk of cancer through your own choices would be enough of a wake up call for him. As well as the fact we haven't been able to have sex in about 10 days purely because he's scared he'll literally poo poo himself if he thrusts too hard, has me on top or if he cums (the idea is loving hilarious, the reality not so much). This is coupled with a family history of heart disease, type 2 diabetes, deep vein thrombosis (big horrid blood clots basically) and obesity.

Nope. After he told me, he was making jokes about it which I guess if you're trying to rationalise a situation is fair enough as you get your head around it. Whatever. Thing is, he's made no effort at all to change things. He had a day off work yesterday in which he texted me whilst I was at work to tell me he'd just eaten a whole cake. I'm not talking a whole cupcake, I'm talking a whole cheesecake usually meant for 8 people for breakfast. As well as some chocolate eggs and a cheesy pasta pot... for breakfast. About 3000 calories of pure sugar and fat.

I don't want to be the person who controls someone's diet. I'm not an abusive piece of poo poo. I wouldn't dream of it. But when I see someone I love gorge themselves on sugar and saturated fat when they know their health is already at risk because of their own decisions, I just don't know what to do. I don't want to break up with him... I want to spend a long time with him, I love him to the moon and back. I just wish he would take more care in his health. I'm not asking him to start lifting weights and to look like Joe Wicks, I just want him to stop slowly killing himself because of the awful food he eats. I've tried doing the gentle approach of the whole "oh you silly goose eating a whole cake for breakfast, you really should eat an apple uwu!!!!" but it doesn't work. I'm scared it's gonna have to be an ultimatum or me saying I think his lack of self respect has made him unattractive to me.

I don't know what to do and I don't know how to approach this situation without sounding controlling. I just want him to realise he's harming himself. I dunno. If anyone has any suggestions on how to talk to him which is more likely to have an effect than a gentle talking to, please fire away.

tl;dr: boyfriend has an awful diet, has developed tumours on his colon because of them that will eventually become cancerous if he doesn't get them removed and then sort out his diet. After he found this out his diet has been the same if not worse (he ate an entire 8 person cheesecake for breakfast yesterday) and I don't know what to do. I need some suggestions on how to give him a wake up call.

Turtlicious posted:

I [18 M] have a thing for incest porn, and it makes me feel really awkward in regards to my sister [25 F]
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/4nnddv/i_18_m_have_a_thing_for_incest_porn_and_it_makes/

Jason Sextro posted:

Yes you stop going to that therapist, come on

dudeness posted:

Me [21f] with my boyfriend [21m], is at risk of developing serious health problems because of his life choices

Naerasa posted:

Only a 21-year-old guy can eat entire cakes for meals and be just 20lbs overweight. At least his colon's been kind enough to call the reaper for him, because the rest of his body sure isn't stepping up.

dudeness posted:

Me [21f] with my boyfriend [21m], is at risk of developing serious health problems because of his life choices

quote:

He comes from a really conservative (by British standards) stiff upper lip, old colonial military family so it's no surprise the only time he's ever seen a doctor is when I've told him he /needs/ to. He's improved in addressing issues, but when it comes to taking steps to improve them he's bloody hopeless.

Pick posted:

that's it, this is the end. im hideous, im old

-- guy born in 1995

dudeness posted:

How do I (19F) tell my bf (29M) to eat better?

Jason Sextro posted:

Maybe report him to an ethics board or something? What do you do about therapists who cross boundaries, anything?

Jason Sextro posted:

Yes you stop going to that therapist, come on

quote:

Hey guys. Throwaway for obvious reasons, and some details are changed(slightly) for privacy. This is probably going to sound ridiculous but here it goes.

My boyfriend (Matt) and I have been together for 3 years, and we have known one another for 5 years. I moved in with him about 3 months ago.

The relationship is great! Whenever we have an argument, we talk it out. We do small things for each other without the other one having to ask. We enjoy doing everything together. He is my best friend and right now I honestly can't imagine my life without him in it. I think he feels the same way.

Matt loves to game. I have no problems with this, as I myself enjoy video games and this was one of the things that initially got us interested in one another. HOWEVER... he can be extremely passionate about his games. He's mentioned wanting to go to gaming tournaments in the past, but as far as I know he's never actually been to one.
A little while after moving in with him, I got sick at work one day and came home early. He was off that day, and was playing his Xbox One with his headphones on. I guess he didn't hear me come in, but I didn't want to disturb him so I went to the bedroom to lie down.

Not half an hour later I hear screaming. And not just a frustrated "I-broke-my-favorite-mug" type of screaming. I'm talking full-blown, "I-just-saw-my-loved-one-brutally-murdered-with-an-axe" type screaming. I jumped up and raced to the living room. Matt was lying on the floor, on his side, shaking. He started screaming again (oh my god I can still hear it) and I freaked out. I grabbed my phone and started dialing 911. I thought he was having a loving seizure from playing the video game. My hands were shaking so bad.

Then suddenly he sat up and looked absolutely mortified because he saw I was standing over him. He asked what I was doing home. I dropped the phone and hugged him and almost started crying. After the initial shock, I asked him if he remembered what happened. He told me that he was angry because of something that happened on the game, so of course I asked if he was joking. His said he wasn't, and the look on his face told me he was being truthful.

I could tell it was embarrassing for him so I didn't push further. Everyone has a breaking point, and I assumed that this was just one of those days and it just happened to be a video game that pushed him over the edge. We went about our day like nothing happened. Weeks passed and eventually I nearly forgot about the incident.

Then it happened again yesterday. And again, it terrified the poo poo out of me. Again, he assured me he was only angry at the game. Also again, he looked very embarrassed so I didn't push discussion further.

Reddit, I think that my boyfriend is having tantrums over a video game. I pretty much just moved in and this has happened twice because he thought I wasn't home. Now I'm certain that it happens a lot more when I'm not around. I don't think suggesting him to stop playing is a good idea, but if the game is making him that angry, I'm starting to question why he plays it. Yes, it was the same game both times.

Does anyone else have any experience with a situation like this? I'd appreciate any input and outside opinion. I'm concerned at this point but I don't know how to go about talking about it.

Thank you for reading.

TL;DR: I moved in with my boyfriend about 3 months ago. He seems to be having tantrums while playing a video game. How should I approach this without it being too embarrassing for him?

EDIT: Thank all of you for your replies! He's at work right now, but I'll watch this thread and read your comments until I am able to have a discussion with him.

Haifisch posted:

My [23F] boyfriend [25 M] of 3 years has a problem while playing his video games.

Haifisch posted:

My [23F] boyfriend [25 M] of 3 years has a problem while playing his video games.

Blue Train posted:

Are these jokes for insane people

Pick posted:

was it The Lion King for the NES because

StupidSexyVaultGuy posted:

You joke, but The Lion King 2 for SNES can elicit this manner of response.