PYF Funny Pictures: on the paradox of meat

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Son of Thunderbeast: Sep 21, 2002

Gromit posted:

As tight as a 12-year-old...

...back injury.

# ? May 12, 2017 06:21

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# ? May 13, 2024 22:07

Guy Goodbody: Aug 31, 2016; by Nyc_Tattoo

Chrpno posted:

See I was never satisfyingly amused by this "joke", surely if a female is 12 years old then she doesn't count as a woman? Besides, the amount of 12 year olds "mixed up with coke" is probably very small, despite what Drew Barrymore says. They would have to have (a) the knowledge and desire for "coke", and (b) the wherewithall to obtain said "coke" either by finance or service. The intersection of both points is not common widespread practice.

But that's not the issue, perhaps the first line should read "I like my whiskey like I like my girls", or even better "I like my whiskey in the way that I prefer little girls". That way the intent has been stated with no linguistic embarrassment or confusion.

Presumably if a 12 year old is mixed up with coke it's because that's a common form of control used by sex traffickers. Not because she just loves cocaine and mows lawns for coke money.

# ? May 12, 2017 06:24

Chrpno: Apr 17, 2006

Guy Goodbody posted:

Presumably if a 12 year old is mixed up with coke it's because that's a common form of control used by sex traffickers. Not because she just loves cocaine and mows lawns for coke money.

Couldn't they use something cheaper? Come on, it's not the 80's anymore.

# ? May 12, 2017 06:26

Memento: Aug 25, 2009; Bleak Gremlin

Powaqoatse posted:

my "favorite" not-whiskey is Jaburn I think it's called.

It doesn't say Whiskey or Whisky anywhere on the bottle, but it's kind of square, the label is black, and the booze itself is brown.

Turns out it's a lovely vodka with caramel coloring & i guess it survives by kind of looking like a whiskey?

# ? May 12, 2017 06:33

Pozload Escobar: Aug 21, 2016; by Reene

Chrpno posted:

See I was never satisfyingly amused by this "joke", surely if a female is 12 years old then she doesn't count as a woman? Besides, the amount of 12 year olds "mixed up with coke" is probably very small, despite what Drew Barrymore says. They would have to have (a) the knowledge and desire for "coke", and (b) the wherewithall to obtain said "coke" either by finance or service. The intersection of both points is not common widespread practice.

But that's not the issue, perhaps the first line should read "I like my whiskey like I like my girls", or even better "I like my whiskey in the way that I prefer little girls". That way the intent has been stated with no linguistic embarrassment or confusion.

Let's beat this nerd's rear end

# ? May 12, 2017 06:48

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

_{_{_{which one of these men is an irl sex offender and which is dead? the answer may surprise you next on Inside Edition}}}

# ? May 12, 2017 06:58

Blurred: Aug 26, 2004; WELL I WONNER WHAT IT'S LIIIIIKE TO BE A GOOD POSTER

See I was never satisfyingly motivated by this "incitement", for even if the poster in question were to possess a donkey, I fail to see how besting it in a contest of sorts would in any way teach the poster a lesson.

# ? May 12, 2017 07:03

Karate Bastard: Jul 31, 2007; Soiled Meat

Why do you assume anyone wants to teach you a lesson?

# ? May 12, 2017 07:10

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

I didn't know that booty, crap, and mulletcore were music genres. I bet they're delightful.

# ? May 12, 2017 10:53

The Bananana: May 21, 2008; This is a metaphor, a Christian allegory. The fact that I have to explain to you that Jesus is the Warthog, and the Banana is drepanocytosis is just embarrassing for you.

A Buff Gay Dude posted:

Let's beat this nerd's rear end

I agree with the buff gay dude

# ? May 12, 2017 11:48

2reachmu: Jul 30, 2005; SA-MART
SUCCESS
STORY

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

I remember picking up a zine from these guys in the mid-90s. I don't know if the shop is still open, but, here's the website with the (maybe) still running zine. http://www.massivemag.com/

# ? May 12, 2017 12:33

Aggro: Apr 24, 2003; STRONG as an OX and TWICE as SMART

Chrpno posted:

See I was never satisfyingly amused by this "joke", surely if a female is 12 years old then she doesn't count as a woman? Besides, the amount of 12 year olds "mixed up with coke" is probably very small, despite what Drew Barrymore says. They would have to have (a) the knowledge and desire for "coke", and (b) the wherewithall to obtain said "coke" either by finance or service. The intersection of both points is not common widespread practice.

But that's not the issue, perhaps the first line should read "I like my whiskey like I like my girls", or even better "I like my whiskey in the way that I prefer little girls". That way the intent has been stated with no linguistic embarrassment or confusion.

The joke works if you change the age to 18.

# ? May 12, 2017 12:34

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Memento posted:

holy gently caress that looks amazingly horrible

e: "Premium Quality" though, might be worth checking out

# ? May 12, 2017 12:36

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Chrpno posted:

See I was never satisfyingly amused by this "joke", surely if a female is 12 years old then she doesn't count as a woman? Besides, the amount of 12 year olds "mixed up with coke" is probably very small, despite what Drew Barrymore says. They would have to have (a) the knowledge and desire for "coke", and (b) the wherewithall to obtain said "coke" either by finance or service. The intersection of both points is not common widespread practice.

But that's not the issue, perhaps the first line should read "I like my whiskey like I like my girls", or even better "I like my whiskey in the way that I prefer little girls". That way the intent has been stated with no linguistic embarrassment or confusion.

yeah "i like my whiskey like i like my girls" works better but lol at writing so much about a bad joke

# ? May 12, 2017 12:38

Pastry of the Year: Apr 12, 2013

Memento posted:

That image makes my organs hurt every time I see it.

# ? May 12, 2017 12:46

Screaming Idiot: Nov 26, 2007; JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

Memento posted:

GET INSIDE ME YOU BEAUTIFUL POISON

# ? May 12, 2017 12:54

Railing Kill: Nov 14, 2008; You are the first crack in the sheer face of god. From you it will spread.

Memento posted:

When the answer to, "Do I want whiskey, or industrial solvent?" is, "Surprise me!"

# ? May 12, 2017 12:57

Bogan King: Jan 21, 2013; I'm not racist, I'm mates with Bangladesh, the guy who sells me kebabs. No, I don't know his real name.

I like that it has a best before date.

# ? May 12, 2017 13:01

Rigged Death Trap: Feb 13, 2012; BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

Now with 10% less methanol

# ? May 12, 2017 13:02

Memento: Aug 25, 2009; Bleak Gremlin

Bogan King posted:

I like that it has a best before date.

It comes in a petrol jug from Sierra Leone, you know it's loving quality.

# ? May 12, 2017 13:05

TrustmeImLegit: Jan 14, 2017; by FactsAreUseless

That's the same jug my windshield washer comes in. Good thing its blue so I won't make a mistake as I doubt I'd taste the difference.

# ? May 12, 2017 13:26

SpaceGoatFarts: Jan 5, 2010; sic transit gloria mundi; Nap Ghost

Memento posted:

It comes in a petrol jug from Sierra Leone, you know it's loving quality.

If you don't feel like buying a jug you can still only purchase a bag

# ? May 12, 2017 13:29

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

hahaha gently caress its 5 liters, iirc a gallon is 3.8 so you cant even be like "oh yeah, a gallon of lovely whisky"

youd have to be like "oh yeah 1.2 gallons of lovely whisky :smug:

# ? May 12, 2017 13:30

Philippe: Aug 9, 2013; (she/her)

Aggro posted:

The joke works if you change the age to 18.

But then it's not ~edgy~

# ? May 12, 2017 13:31

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

But then it's not ~edgy~

Also it's a crime to mix any whiskey aged over 12 years with coke.

# ? May 12, 2017 13:33

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Solice Kirsk posted:

Also it's a crime to mix any whiskey aged over 12 years with coke.

yea to be honest thats where it falls apart

im surprised it took so long for anyone to point that out tho

# ? May 12, 2017 13:34

Snowglobe of Doom: Mar 30, 2012; sucks to be right

Solice Kirsk posted:

Also it's a crime to mix any whiskey aged over 12 years with coke.

What if the coke is also 12 years old

# ? May 12, 2017 13:39

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

vodka and crystal pepsi (aged 30 years)

# ? May 12, 2017 13:41

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

but whiskey & coke instead

# ? May 12, 2017 13:49

Paladinus: Jan 11, 2014; heyHEYYYY!!!

twoday posted:

vodka and crystal pepsi (aged 30 years)

Have a good day!

# ? May 12, 2017 14:07

BlankIsBeautiful: Apr 4, 2008; Feeling a little inadequate?

Memento posted:

I'm imagining that tastes the way lacquer thinner smells.

# ? May 12, 2017 14:21

Slime: Jan 3, 2007

BlankIsBeautiful posted:

I'm imagining that tastes the way lacquer thinner smells.

I'm going to say it tastes like paint thinner, mostly because it looks like some very cheap gin a friend brought to a party as a joke once. I sniffed it and declared it smelled like paint thinner. Then I drank some and it tastes pretty much how you'd expect paint thinner to taste if you were dumb enough to drink it.

tl;dr i was dumb enough to drink paint thinner

# ? May 12, 2017 14:38

Big Grunty Secret: Aug 28, 2007; Just one question, though. Is there a way to take off my pants?

Bogan King posted:

I like that it has a best before date.

I assume it's the same as with bottled water, where the "best before" date indicates not when the contents spoil but the bottle spoils.

# ? May 12, 2017 14:50

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Slime posted:

I'm going to say it tastes like paint thinner, mostly because it looks like some very cheap gin a friend brought to a party as a joke once. I sniffed it and declared it smelled like paint thinner. Then I drank some and it tastes pretty much how you'd expect paint thinner to taste if you were dumb enough to drink it.

tl;dr i was dumb enough to drink paint thinner

its probably exactly the same as that cheap gin, minus juniper berries, but plus caramel coloring

# ? May 12, 2017 17:03