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i have performed secret surveys of the palate of CSPAM, and i have calculated three special ingredients that truly embody the cuisine of this wonderful subforum. i have decided to challenge myself by producing a wonderful meal using these ingredients, and i welcome all of you to join me in this endeavor! the rules are: 1) there will be three secret ingredients, and you must use at least one secret ingredient in every dish. these ingredients' flavors should be emphasized in the dish, not hidden. celebrate them!!! 2) you must produce a three course meal. appetizer, main course, dessert. inventing an alcoholic refreshment to go along with the meal is a wonderful way to receive bonus points!!! 3) creativity is important, but so is edibility! there are starving kids in kansas that u should think about before wasting food in a dumb gag that you'll take a taste from and then throw out. make it tasty, then give us a trip report!!! 4) post your recipes!!! especially if its tasty, there is no greater joy in life than to share and be shared in return 🌹🌹🌹 5) im going to close the thread on the 18th at around midnight, so get your entries in! im going to try to get my presentation done in the next two days or so 6) remember this is the part of the dead gay comedy forum where shitposts go to have existential crises so try to have fun!!! also you wont win anything except the respect of your peers~~~~~~~ so with no more blabla, on to the show your secret ingredients are: RANCH DRESSING RANCH SEASONING COOL RANCH DORITOS allez cuisine!
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 03:41 |
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# ? May 11, 2024 16:22 |
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oh my christ i was so onboard until i saw the ingredients, gonna have to wait for the next grocery run this weekend, because somehow i don't seem to have any of that poo poo in stock i don't even have buttermilk to make ranch e: defs would tend towards making my own ranch dressing with the assumption that ranch = buttermilk + mayo + spices, is this acceptable to the judges, or do i need hidden valley specifically, or onions and other american garbage in general e2: actually let me withdraw that, we're doing this poo poo old school, and if hidden valley ranch kills the dish, that dish deserves to die Duscat fucked around with this message at 04:43 on Jun 9, 2017 |
# ? Jun 9, 2017 04:31 |
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you got plenty of time, friendo! ive been thinking for a few days so i have a head start i still need to pick some things up tomorrow but im v excited to see if the wackier ideas end up edible
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 04:38 |
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If I can think of a dessert, I'll take a stab. I already have ideas for the first 2 courses
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 05:19 |
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nothing is mandatory friendo, if you can't think of something i'd def rather u share what u have than just quit because ~the rules~ gently caress the police
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 05:21 |
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mormonpartyboat posted:nothing is mandatory friendo, if you can't think of something i'd def rather u share what u have than just quit because ~the rules~ Oh god, I managed to think of dessert, but I have no clue if I can pull it off Oh god, it doesn't even turn up any google results, I've gotta try this
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 05:34 |
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bookmarked this thread
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 08:30 |
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Lindsey O. Graham posted:bookmarked this thread
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 14:21 |
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Duscat posted:e2: actually let me withdraw that, we're doing this poo poo old school, and if hidden valley ranch kills the dish, that dish deserves to die ----------------
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 14:28 |
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i absolutely hate ranch to the point where the smell makes me gag and im looking forward to participating
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 15:24 |
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*makes karate chop motion and screeches autisticly*
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 15:27 |
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ranch salmon soup 1 can of salmon chunks 1 stick of butter 2 cups of milk 1/2 cup of ranch 1 packet of ranch seasoning 1 bag of Cool Ranch Doritos Combine salmon, butter, mlik, ranch, and ranch seasoning into large pot on low heat, do not boil Remove from heat when at satisfactory temp Salt and Pepper to taste Serve with Doritos
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 16:15 |
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Lindsey O. Graham posted:bookmarked this thread
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 18:02 |
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what im planning on doing to myself is going 2 be brutal
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 18:10 |
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I despise mayo and ranch in all forms so I'll jump in on a round of this that won't make me gag
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 18:11 |
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RANCH DRESSING (Main course) Spaghetti and Ranch seasoned meatballs with Ranch sauce. RANCH SEASONING (Appetizer) Ranch seasoned chicken bites. COOL RANCH DORITOS (Dessert) Ranch icecream with Dorito bits. There's an icecream maker sale at walmart theyre like $40, got $74 on my plasma donor card, could pick one up for this stupid thread lmao
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 18:16 |
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no milk? how do you expect to rule from
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 18:35 |
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Buffalo Chicken Wing Dip w/ Ranch 1 rotesserie chicken, shredded 1 or 2 cups, whatever, of hot sauce 1 block of cream cheese 1 bag shredded cheddar cook in a crock pot you fat bitch ROUND 2 Cut up veggies then coat 'em in a batter MADE FROM loving RANCH DRESSING Round 3 Cornbread pudding where the corn meal is blendered up doritos like a bag of that a can of creamed corn a can of whole corn kernels a stick or two of butter BAKE IT IN THE OVEN TIL FIRM @ 350
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:19 |
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im looking forward to everyones pictures!!!
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:21 |
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mormonpartyboat posted:im looking forward to everyones pictures!!! im just in the planning stage right now, i need to find out if ranch seasoning will dissolve in melted sugar
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:23 |
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Al! posted:im just in the planning stage right now, i need to find out if ranch seasoning will dissolve in melted sugar you should see the monstrosities in my freezer
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:24 |
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buncha ranch holes
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:24 |
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I'm not interested in actually cooking this but just jogging my thinking muscle: Appetizer: Ranch Fondue with. Roasted crudite, Dorito celebration, and ranch Parmesan crisps Dinner: Dorito-crusted 'chicken kiev' with ranch dressing and parsley Blistered ranch broccoli rabe Cheddar polenta Dessert: Ranch Brownie ala mode mountain dew ice cream Ranch syrup drizzle Dorito garnish Business Gorillas fucked around with this message at 19:34 on Jun 9, 2017 |
# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:26 |
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mormonpartyboat posted:you should see the monstrosities in my freezer never go home with a guy who tells you this
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:27 |
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mormonpartyboat posted:im looking forward to everyones pictures!!!
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:29 |
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It's hosed up that I'm actually wondering if you could grind up enough Cool Ranch Doritos to make a cornbread out of them
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:55 |
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Naerasa posted:It's hosed up that I'm actually wondering if you could grind up enough Cool Ranch Doritos to make a cornbread out of them Family size bag outta do it.
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 19:56 |
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Naerasa posted:It's hosed up that I'm actually wondering if you could grind up enough Cool Ranch Doritos to make a cornbread out of them That was a joke at first and then I realized it would probably own
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 22:56 |
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alrightttt did all my shopping so im going to be cooking all day tomorrow whooo
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 23:15 |
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im thinking about some kind of deconstructed sloppy joe on a cool ranch crostini
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# ? Jun 9, 2017 23:26 |
The appetizer is a line of the ranch powder and all the other courses are cancelled in favor of railing more lines
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 01:05 |
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I'm a horrible cook, so my idea of a cool ranch cake will not come to fruition
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 02:36 |
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Aspiring Iron Chef Duscat has once again taken the time to write a beautifully calligraphed menu! Surprisingly, there are only two listed dishes this time, perhaps the chef is planning a surprise? Back to you Fukui-san!
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 02:56 |
Duscat posted:Aspiring Iron Chef Duscat has once again taken the time to write a beautifully calligraphed menu! Dorito tempura mushrooms sounds actually good
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 03:30 |
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this is going to be a loving circus in the kitchen so im actually doing up a cooking order lmao also gently caress i bought dates and not figs
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 03:41 |
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mormonpartyboat posted:this is going to be a loving circus in the kitchen so im actually doing up a cooking order lmao lol i may have to buy a goddamn deep fat fryer
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 04:02 |
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Lindsey O. Graham posted:bookmarked this thread
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 04:06 |
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I wonder if there's a way to get a heat stable ranch so you can replace the deep fry oil with ranch itself.
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 04:31 |
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Bip Roberts posted:I wonder if there's a way to get a heat stable ranch so you can replace the deep fry oil with ranch itself. from testing, if you bake ranch it doesnt crisp at all, and in fact kind of degenerates into gooey oil would probably need to strain the solids through like cheesecloth and then add some extra oil to reduce its thickness but~~~
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 04:36 |
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# ? May 11, 2024 16:22 |
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I'm not sure if I'm gonna have the time for the whole meal, but someone needs to try to make Ranch Meringues Probably would want to use Ranch powder, since I think the fat of ranch dressing might break the foam
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# ? Jun 10, 2017 04:52 |