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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:*sitting with fainted girl*
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Jun 9, 2017 19:48
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Fartbox posted:If you want to upset Americans, just sass their military industrial complex - the biggest cancer on their economy bar none While I agree that our military budget is hilariously overblown, most of that wasted money goes into the American economy. If you REALLY want to rile up Americans, tell them that their military is a socialist jobs program designed to give people from rural areas with no access to decent education training and job skills that they wouldn't otherwise be able to receive  Full disclosure, I am an American veteran. Ask me about paying $500 for an o-ring 
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Jun 9, 2017 19:56
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grumplestiltzkin posted:Full disclosure, I am an American veteran. Ask me about paying $500 for an o-ring I bet it was the best top quality o-ring you ever saw though.
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Jun 9, 2017 20:00
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:Textbook "I want a vulnerable shy girl I can rescue so she'll have to love me forever and will never challenge me or tell me I'm wrong" neckbeard poo poo. Same, but big jugs instead that other stuff
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Jun 9, 2017 20:07
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yeah I eat rear end posted:I bet it was the best top quality o-ring you ever saw though. That O-ring can function in the heat of the desert or the cold of the mountains. With a rating of thousands of miles. Thousands. *10 years of R&D. $2.2bil to the tax payer.
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Jun 9, 2017 20:32
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Zzulu posted:the full might of Europe LOL
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Jun 9, 2017 20:53
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grumplestiltzkin posted:While I agree that our military budget is hilariously overblown, most of that wasted money goes into the American economy. If you REALLY want to rile up Americans, tell them that their military is a socialist jobs program designed to give people from rural areas with no access to decent education training and job skills that they wouldn't otherwise be able to receive This 100%. Bonus points for telling them that after they just got done ranting about welfare queens and the evils of socialism.
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Jun 9, 2017 23:42
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:She was her own person. If she got sick of being ridiculed, she'd have done something about it. She didn't need you to ride in on your white steed, point your sword at the bullies, and tell them to lay off. I agree in general but I would have actually liked someone to stand up for me in middle school, most of the bullying that came my way was because I didn't have the confidence to stand up for myself and would just get sad that "everyone hated me" so I made an easy target. I eventually stopped talking altogether to avoid being made fun of because my parents were real dumb about social situations and told me to just ignore everybody, and that standing up for myself would just get me beat up. So in high school I really wanted friends but since I never talked, I seemed unfriendly and stuck up, and the other kids thought I hated them. I could have used another kid (a girl, I was only picked on by the other girls) who understood and showed me that it was okay to have self-confidence. When you're done growing up though it's time to figure this stuff out for yourself.
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Jun 9, 2017 23:49
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Nonanonymous confession. I just found out another one of my friends OD'd today. I really thought this was gonna be the year since I turned 22 that I wasn't gonna lose a friend, but I guess not. The worst part is I don't even get surprised anymore. This was a guy I've fought and bled with, lived with for a few years, have been friends with for over 17, and was just hanging out with last weekend and had just talked to him yesterday about our weekend plans. And the only thing I feel is a bit of let down that now I won't get to see him this weekend. Not sad, no surprise, not much of anything. I think I may actually need to take the thread's advice and go to therapy. It's not normal to loose a best friend and think to yourself "Wow, at least I made it to June before one of them died this year." This sucks.
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Jun 10, 2017 00:50
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I know that feeling. I'm so sorry.
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Jun 10, 2017 00:56
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Solice Kirsk posted:Nonanonymous confession. I just found out another one of my friends OD'd today. I really thought this was gonna be the year since I turned 22 that I wasn't gonna lose a friend, but I guess not. The worst part is I don't even get surprised anymore. This was a guy I've fought and bled with, lived with for a few years, have been friends with for over 17, and was just hanging out with last weekend and had just talked to him yesterday about our weekend plans. And the only thing I feel is a bit of let down that now I won't get to see him this weekend. Not sad, no surprise, not much of anything. I think I may actually need to take the thread's advice and go to therapy. It's not normal to loose a best friend and think to yourself "Wow, at least I made it to June before one of them died this year." Yeah therapy might be good. You're gonna end up being that third tour guy in a war movie who can't make connections with any new people cuz he knows they're getting blown up in the second act.
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Jun 10, 2017 01:22
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Solice Kirsk posted:Nonanonymous confession. I just found out another one of my friends OD'd today. I really thought this was gonna be the year since I turned 22 that I wasn't gonna lose a friend, but I guess not. The worst part is I don't even get surprised anymore. This was a guy I've fought and bled with, lived with for a few years, have been friends with for over 17, and was just hanging out with last weekend and had just talked to him yesterday about our weekend plans. And the only thing I feel is a bit of let down that now I won't get to see him this weekend. Not sad, no surprise, not much of anything. I think I may actually need to take the thread's advice and go to therapy. It's not normal to loose a best friend and think to yourself "Wow, at least I made it to June before one of them died this year." Gonna second the therapy, and give a tough love suggestion as well. When i quit hard drugs and started trying to turn my life around i made it clear to all my friend that anything harder than weed wasn't welcome around me anymore, and i would turn then in to the cops in a heartbeat if they brought it around. I lost a few who just couldn't spend a day around me without being hosed up on coke or meth, but most of them actually ended up quitting in the long run. Even had one dude move in with me as a way for him to kick the habit, since he knew i wasn't bluffing and i felt it was for his own drat good.
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Jun 10, 2017 01:29
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I couldn't call the cops on my friends. That's just not in me. We all kinda moved away from each other years and years ago when everything was really spiraling out of control, but the few of us that made it have all started coming back together, older and wiser. It's just the last few that didn't leave and haven't died sooner that are dropping now. This one came out of the blue though. I know very little since it just happened, but he was talking about getting clean just the other day. My guess is something happened with his ex-wife or kids. Kinda wanna go drink it up with my friends, but I got work in the morning and it's gonna be like 90 degrees (32.2222 C so we don't start that again), I have to wear a suit and tie at work so I'm gonna be all stuffy and hot, I hate that I have to work Saturdays at all to begin with, and now this floating over my head is just too much and I'll wind up getting fired. Thanks though guys. I can't say anything to any of my IRL friends about it just yet because I and a few others know before all of his family does, so it was just good for me to throw some thoughts down.
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Jun 10, 2017 02:01
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Good luck dealing with it man, and goondolences.
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Jun 10, 2017 02:20
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Aw jeez, sorry to hear that Solice  Hang in there dudeAt any rate, here is the latest installment in the exciting "friend's wife hit on me" saga quote:Alright, so since the story of what she did at the trip I finally told my friend. He's absolutely enraged at me. When I told him he stormed out of my apartment and hasn't responded to any of my calls or texts since. His wife, on the other hand, has been texting me nonstop. She's been asking what I told him, telling me we need to talk about everything, asking if we're still friends. Stress is a hell of a drug
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Jun 10, 2017 15:49
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Double-postin since I'm not sure what my schedule will be todayquote:I am a sex addict; doctor diagnosed, not self-disgnosed. quote:Hey thread, Greek restaurant goon here to answer a few questions.
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Jun 10, 2017 15:52
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They are definitely going to think something is wrong if you shut down and aren't renovating or anything. Your staff is probably going to be overly dramatic about the pay cut but it's only because they want to cling to the absurd gravy train you've had them on and think you'll bend and still give them their insane hourly rates. Do not let yourself be guilted into keeping the pay the same, and don't "meet them in the middle". Determine what you can pay them and be profitable (if you run a business you should be able to do this easily) and stick to that number.
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Jun 10, 2017 16:13
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Listen, I've got bad news. You're still like 90% likely to fail. But you've got a mostly non-stupid business plan. I'd say put up a new paint job and advertise a bunch. If people ask why you were closed just say you wanted to give the place a face lift.
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Jun 10, 2017 16:47
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All the Greek/American fair places around here also include fries in their combos as well. Some offer a choice of fries, rice (cooked in chicken bullion), or salad for their combos. If your margins are already solid, you can probably afford the extra ~50 cents extra it'll cost you to let them feel like they got a lot of food. And because it's Utah, fry sauce is also provided for the fries if you'd like. It's as delicious as it is unhealthy!
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Jun 10, 2017 17:14
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Ok the best kebab i've ever had was actually a burger think a kebab in a flat turkish bread that was the best and would probably appeal to peeps more than a regular gyro?
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Jun 10, 2017 17:21
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Holy gently caress that wife story certainly took a dark turn.  edit: The hell was he quoting?
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Jun 10, 2017 17:47
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Wait, sex isn't a normal part of human communication?
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Jun 10, 2017 17:56
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Clockwerk posted:All the Greek/American fair places around here also include fries in their combos as well. Some offer a choice of fries, rice (cooked in chicken bullion), or salad for their combos. If your margins are already solid, you can probably afford the extra ~50 cents extra it'll cost you to let them feel like they got a lot of food. Fellow Utah goon chiming in to say our Greek food is loving awful, but they do pile the fries high (with sauce).
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Jun 10, 2017 17:59
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Kebab is a top 3 fast food in Sweden. Simply move your business here
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Jun 10, 2017 17:59
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I think closing for a week is a bad idea, especially for a place trying to maintain a regular lunch crowd. If you do decide to have a hiatus, make sure you have a bunch of clear "Under construction, re-openning better than ever next week!" signs clearly posted. An Advertising blitz isn't a bad idea, especially if you can tie it to a special event. Find some kind of obscure greek festival or fun historical event that takes place in the near future and use that as an excuse. Or just make one up, "Spanakopita!!!"
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Jun 10, 2017 18:21
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I'm not too big on Greek food with too many onions. Spanakopita is great. If you've got repeat customers for the most part it's easy to stick signs on the windows saying you'll be closed for two weeks or whatever. Just say you're closing for the holidays. Your loyal customers might like that. Also recommend giving out cards for loyal customers. Buy 9 lunches the tenth is free. People love free stuff even when it really isn't.
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Jun 10, 2017 20:51
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quote:I have a big passion for Greek food so we kept the menu mostly gree This is your first problem. Leave your passion for your hobby. It’s great to be passionate about your work, but if you want to run a successful business, sell what customers want to buy, not what you want to make. Can’t say whether what you make is that, but few people actually want authentic foreign food daily; at best something familiar with a foreign touch. Let’s do some math next. You say your best item is 100 gyros sold for $7 costing you $0.50. Being generous, that earns you (5 days a week, 50 weeks a year) $6.5 * 100 * 5 * 50 / 12 = $13500 a month. Far from enough to cover your $20000 deficit. Better have another item that’s as successful or cut costs significantly. And you don’t earn $6.50; staff and rent should be factored in too. What has changed after the first 2 months is that when a new place pops up, most people try it out once shortly thereafter. Maybe they like it and come back, maybe they don’t. But they are not coming back in their same numbers, because they already have places they go, and you just add to the existing market. Don’t count on ever getting the 100 gyros/day back. You know that 90% fast food competition around? You’re part of that. Greek food is not really fancy even if it takes more time to make. Why do you have multiple waitstaff for just 8 tables? One person waiting tables, somebody in the kitchen and one at the bar is at the upper limit of what should be needed for 8 tables. You can cut it down to 2 if you don’t sell takeout at the same time.
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Jun 10, 2017 21:05
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Oh my god take it to BFC to save your failing restaurant
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Jun 10, 2017 21:54
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > GBS > Anonymous Confessions: ITT we save a failing restaurant
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Jun 10, 2017 22:55
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Maybe we can get Soundmonkey to come help with PR. I'll start the wiki
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Jun 10, 2017 23:03
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Or just get noni in here and he'll donate 50k to get you back on your feet
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Jun 10, 2017 23:23
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Solice Kirsk posted:Holy gently caress that wife story certainly took a dark turn. loquacius messed up his quote brackets, it's actually two different feshes. Still, funny to imagine its the same fesher.
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Jun 10, 2017 23:38
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Restaurants are tough businesses. Burn it down for the insurance money and open a laundromat or something.
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Jun 11, 2017 03:32
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PostNouveau posted:Restaurants are tough businesses. Burn it down for the insurance money and open a laundromat or something. 
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Jun 11, 2017 04:26
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PostNouveau posted:Restaurants are tough businesses. Burn it down for the insurance money and open a laundromat or something. Lazer-tag.
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Jun 11, 2017 06:30
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Solice Kirsk posted:...work Saturdays at all to begin with, and now this floating over my head is just too much and I'll wind up getting fired. My old job had a situation like that, and the guy was paid for his time away. He had a mental breakdown (where you are, if you can't feel anything after this traumatic event) AND definitely needed time away. Mental illnesses are every bit as valid as physical ones.
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Jun 11, 2017 09:33
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quote:I'm extremely gay and extremely deep in the closet. How deep? I just proposed to my girlfriend and we have our wedding set for October of next year. quote:I hated my old co-worker and anonymously tipped off our HR department that he was smoking weed on company property and on company time. Long story short - HR caught him in the act and disciplined him, then followed him back to his desk to make sure he didn't have any other drugs in his desk. He didn't, but he did have a gun which he didn't have a permit for. It was loaded.
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Jun 11, 2017 14:24
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another doublepost, voila les feshesquote:Several years ago I was visiting NYC on a weekend trip with my wife. We were walking around Rockefeller Plaza and I suddenly had to poo poo really bad. Like, gonna fill my pants any second bad. I found a bathroom and proceeded to destroy that toilet, it was like I was unleashing 20 gallons of fecal chili from my bowels. It just kept dropping out. I really like this fesh because the central conceit in its storyline is that comedy legend Dan Akroyd hears a man violently making GBS threads in the next stall over and becomes overwhelmed with concern for this man's dietary health, hygiene practices, and mental wellbeing quote:I was a little buzzed one night and, to avoid any possible DUI checkpoints, I drove through a residential area. As I'm driving I see something black jet out in front of me and I don't have time to stop. I ran it over and heard a nasty bump and a howl.
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Jun 11, 2017 14:30
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A dude posted:I'm extremely gay and extremely deep in the closet. I live in the dirty south where being gay is as bad as saying "I worship Satan" right now. Um, how about leaving for a decent city? I'm straight, white and conservative, and still I'd rather cut off my balls than live in the 'dirty south'. Another dude posted:I hated my old co-worker and anonymously tipped off our HR department that he was smoking weed on company property and on company time. Long story short - HR caught him in the act and disciplined him, then followed him back to his desk to make sure he didn't have any other drugs in his desk. He didn't, but he did have a gun which he didn't have a permit for. It was loaded. Not your fault, weed plus a gun makes this guy a ticking time bomb. Also how did he not go to jail in the first place? Being anywhere near an unlicensed gun is deep doo-doo.
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Jun 11, 2017 16:10
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I'd rather find the dog you son of a bitch. That happened to me two years ago and we never found him, I spent weeks searching the woods
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Jun 11, 2017 16:10
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