|
loquacius posted:I once took a staycation between quitting an old job and starting a new one, and ruined my entire week by spending it getting caffeine clean What about buying another one of those dolls that's made to look like your younger brother's 11 year old crush? That will surely make things less weird.
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 08:23
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 11, 2024 20:13 |
|
|
ok but can we just go back to 'and than her friend stomped on my top hat' bahahaha!
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 09:48
|
|
|
Why, yes we can  loquacius posted:
Ahahaha!
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 10:21
|
|
|
Modern man amongst the savages posted:. She spent the night after a month of dating. The next day *at work* I was pulled in to HR. Told that I was setting a bad example for younger members of the company, that I had loose morals, and that this stuff might fly in other places but not here. Fake confessions is one thing but why pointlessly lie?
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 10:34
|
|
|
tactlessbastard posted:Fake confessions is one thing but why pointlessly lie? I think I saw that episode of Fambly Guy but yeah Maybe they are time travelling?
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 10:36
|
|
|
Lote posted:What about buying another one of those dolls that's made to look like your younger brother's 11 year old crush? That will surely make things less weird. Or he could have an older one made that looks like him, leave it there, and never go back. I mean, face facts: it's only a matter of time before they kill you and skin you and turn you into a doll anyway.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 11:25
|
|
|
tactlessbastard posted:Fake confessions is one thing but why pointlessly lie? Test if the plot rings true enough to be useful in whatever fiction you're writing.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 11:29
|
|
|
quote:I drink 10-12 cups of coffee a day, along with the equivalent of 2 liters of Mtn Dew. That's my baseline - if I have a long day or need to stay up late I'll supplement that with a few Red Bulls, some caffeine pills, or just some more coffee. Sometimes I'll even just chew choco covered coffee beans. And, let's be honest, sometimes I just chew regular coffee beans. This has been a slowly escalating habit since I was in high school, leading to where I am now at age 34. my nigga have you tried LSD
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 13:42
|
|
|
tactlessbastard posted:Fake confessions is one thing but why pointlessly lie? Dunno, I find this more believable than the porcelain brother, but then again, ultra conservative, religious extremist Americans have always been funny to me. What rubs me the wrong way is he says the tried to convert him away from his catholic beliefs, but over here, Catholics are usually the no-sex-before-marriage crowd as far as I know.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 13:58
|
|
|
Work goon, call your corporate HR and tell them you're being singled out for your religion and you feel it's a hostile work environment. You'll be on easy street or out of there in a week.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 14:03
|
|
|
Hopper posted:Dunno, I find this more believable than the porcelain brother, but then again, ultra conservative, religious extremist Americans have always been funny to me. What rubs me the wrong way is he says the tried to convert him away from his catholic beliefs, but over here, Catholics are usually the no-sex-before-marriage crowd as far as I know. Catholics arent Christians to many Americans, so therefore they have no morals. Also American Catholics as constituent members not leadership tend to have fairly lax attitudes towards things like that.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:10
|
|
|
The PUA one is fake because there's no such thing as a 300 pound meth head.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:21
|
|
|
thomawesome posted:The PUA one is fake because there's no such thing as a 300 pound meth head. less meth more math quote:I followed the PUA code for about 3 years. In all 3 years, I had sex 6 times. All six were one night stands. 3 of the girls were over 300 lbs, one was a meth head (and actually asked me to buy her meth the next morning), and the other 2 had major self esteem issues despite being fairly attractive girls.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:34
|
|
|
Technically, one of them could have been a 300 lb methhead with low self esteem 
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:40
|
|
|
Hopper posted:Dunno, I find this more believable than the porcelain brother, but then again, ultra conservative, religious extremist Americans have always been funny to me. What rubs me the wrong way is he says the tried to convert him away from his catholic beliefs, but over here, Catholics are usually the no-sex-before-marriage crowd as far as I know. I'm pretty sure American Catholicism is way chiller than Catholicism in most other parts of the world -- the person I heard this from attributed it to the greater influence of nuns here as opposed to other places. Plus, in the Midwest and South our Protestants are buckwild so even if they were standard Catholics they'd face pretty stiff competition on the zealotry front I mean "buckwild" in the "condemning sex as sinful and wrong" sense ofc quote:- fesh deleted at request of confessor, it was about losing a bet on a hockey game - I don't follow hockey but according to Wikipedia the Penguins won this game by a score of 6-0 quote:I have always had the gift for divination and psychic power since I was a kid. Being able to predict things, reading minds, all the cliche stuff. I excelled in sports because I knew what was going to happen before it happened - I was an all-star quarterback in high school and went to college on a full-ride scholarship. I got injured early in the season and my football career got put on the backburner. Which was fine because I knew it wasn't what I really wanted to do. uh-huh try not doing it for a day, out of curiosity, see what happens Worst case you can always re-psychic him again tomorrow right loquacius fucked around with this message at 03:26 on Jun 19, 2017 |
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:44
|
|
|
Betting goon: lending half a million dollars from some shady guy to win 350k doesn't sound like the brightest idea. And besides, even if you won, there are probably way richer goons here.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:49
|
|
|
Betting goon sounds like my dad. Every time a series looks like it's going to go to game 7, he starts talking about how it's rigged and they let it happen to maximize revenue. He ignores the majority of other instances where it doesn't go to game 7 (which the one in question didn't) because it doesn't fit that narrative. Also those odds are not very good and you deserved to lose every penny if you bet huge on that. Every time people do this thinking it's free money/a sure thing you always hear them crying the day after when the big upset happens. I'd say this is fake because of how stupid the guy is, but was the confession at least sent before the game?
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:54
|
|
|
loquacius posted:I don't follow hockey but according to Wikipedia the Penguins won this game by a score of 6-0 Could you cross-check the date the email was sent and the date the game was played? I want to see if this person wrote this in advance of the game (and therefore might be for real), or if they just decided to fake a confession and picked a recent hockey game to use in their story.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 15:59
|
|
|
Gambling goon: https://twitter.com/andymoney69/status/349276233084837889?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=http%3A%2F%2Fstorify.com%2Fjoepawl%2Fa-rod-rules
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 16:04
|
|
|
Hedrigall posted:Could you cross-check the date the email was sent and the date the game was played? I want to see if this person wrote this in advance of the game (and therefore might be for real), or if they just decided to fake a confession and picked a recent hockey game to use in their story. Double-checked that before posting it. The date and time given in the confession are accurate (almost -- it was sent at 11:36 AM, not noon)
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 16:14
|
|
|
loquacius posted:Double-checked that before posting it. The date and time given in the confession are accurate (almost -- it was sent at 11:36 AM, not noon) I hope it's real because people betting more than they can lose will never not be funny to me.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 16:30
|
|
|
loquacius posted:
Ironically "psychic" goon sounds like my ex right before she tried to burn down our apartment after not eating for three days.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 17:25
|
|
|
To psychic dude - Thanks a lot man!
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 17:30
|
|
|
Blah blah blah posted:I leveraged my house, my entire 401k, my own personal savings, my car. I found a bookie via a mechanic I know; the guy is floating me a line of credit to the tune of $500k No bookie would give a 500K credit line to some schmoe he just met. Either fake fesh, or he was planning to clothesline you if you won. Herf a derf posted:I am in a constant psychic mind battle with an alien entity that wishes to control the world. No one with delusions this deep could get a college degree and a real office job. To quote Adams, "People may be stupid, but they're not that stupid." Also, if you're psychic, why not just bet on sports?
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 18:11
|
|
|
because we just saw how well that loving goes
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 18:16
|
|
|
Agentdark posted:Ironically "psychic" goon sounds like my ex right before she tried to burn down our apartment after not eating for three days. Holy poo poo dude...
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 18:21
|
|
|
Psychic dude excelled at sports because he could see the future, but apparently couldnt see far enough into the future to prevent himself from being injured. Have fun with your mental illness broseph.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 19:10
|
|
|
quote:I am in a constant psychic mind battle with an alien entity that wishes to control the world. same
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 19:14
|
|
|
The guy also got his math wrong. If he has $1 million bet, he will net 1.35 million plus the original million. If he bet 500k of his own money then he would win $675,000 and get the original $500,000 back.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 19:50
|
|
|
Basically this dude just sucks at every kind of math that he was confessing to be good at.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 19:59
|
|
|
Lote posted:The guy also got his math wrong. If he has $1 million bet, he will net 1.35 million plus the original million. If he bet 500k of his own money then he would win $675,000 and get the original $500,000 back. No, I'm pretty sure that's not how it works.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 19:59
|
|
|
Psychic guy's confession reads like a Neil Breen monologue
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:09
|
|
|
shut up blegum posted:No, I'm pretty sure that's not how it works. Yeah, that is a bizarre interpretation of how betting works.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:10
|
|
|
I have bet on sports exactly once, I happened to be in Vegas when the Pats were playing a playoff game so I put down $100 on them to cover and watched it in the Caesar's sportsbook Anyway they covered the spread and made me some money which I think is the least they could do, but it made the game more stressful than it needed to be. My wife was like "relax, they're winning and we're halfway through the fourth quarter" and I was like "but they need to win by ten points or I'm out $100 and they're only up by 7!!!" But anyway that was my only problem because not only is my football team v good but I also didn't go $500,000 into debt with a loan shark to make the bet in the first place, ok thanks for reading
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:17
|
|
|
Yeah no one is that stupid. Sorry but it's fake.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:20
|
|
|
loquacius posted:I have bet on sports exactly once, I happened to be in Vegas when the Pats were playing a playoff game so I put down $100 on them to cover and watched it in the Caesar's sportsbook Betting some amount can make games you'd otherwise never watch more interesting. I always join the march madness or ncaa football tournament bracket challenge things because otherwise I'd never watch a single game that didn't have the florida gators in it.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:24
|
|
|
I put a dollar into a penny slot once killing time soaking up free drinks (free drinks while playing, and "playing" can include dicking around playing snake on your phone and pulling the lever when you see a cocktail waitress) before going to see Penn & Teller once. Lost track of time due to the free drinks... I kept being ±5¢ for like an hour and a half. These penny slots let you bet all these crazy bets, so you can set it up so you're better a quarter or 50 cents per turn. So I did that intending to piss away my dollar and catch a cab. Ended up hitting for 75 bucks. Cashed out, got a cab, and never returned to Circus Circus. I did it. I beat the house.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:26
|
|
|
Not to mention refi for cash takes a month to process with new underwriting and surveys and everything. Although, maybe he had done all of that in anticipation for making a large stupid sports bet in a series that neither team had lost at home yet.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:27
|
|
|
Returning to Circus Circus is a pretty bad decision even if you like gambling When I went to Vegas it was both the most depressing and the creepiest of the casinos
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:29
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 11, 2024 20:13 |
|
|
shut up blegum posted:No, I'm pretty sure that's not how it works. Unless I'm missing the joke, he bet the line at +135. Also, if you stay at Circus Circus, you've lost regardless of how much money you win.
|
|
#
?
Jun 15, 2017 20:41
|
|