Fiction Writing Advice and Discussion: Read. Write. Crit. Repeat.

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Creative Convention > Fiction Writing Advice and Discussion: Read. Write. Crit. Repeat.

«‹›147 »

Dr. Kloctopussy: Apr 22, 2003; "It's time....to DIE!"

Sociopastry posted:

So I got Scrivener for writing and so far I love it, but I've got a bit of a problem- it keeps underlining every single word as misspelled, no matter what. Google's not helping me.

These directions might be a little off for you, because I use Scrivener for Mac.

Check your language preferences:
Preferences -> corrections -> system text preferences -> text

I have a drop down menu there under spelling: that has a language selection drop-down. Mine is set to "Automatic by Language" and works fine, but try setting it specifically to the language you are using.

You can turn off all spelling check:
Preferences -> corrections -> spelling

Not ideal, but better.

If neither of these work acceptably, email customer support.

Dr. Kloctopussy fucked around with this message at 19:33 on Jun 8, 2017

# ? Jun 8, 2017 19:18

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 9, 2024 14:27

FluxFaun: Apr 7, 2010

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

These directions might be a little off for you, because I use Scrivener for Mac.

Check your language preferences:
Preferences -> corrections -> system text preferences -> text

I have a drop down menu there under spelling: that has a language selection drop-down. Mine is set to "Automatic by Language" and works fine, but try setting it specifically to the language you are using.

You can turn off all spelling check:
Preferences -> corrections -> spelling

Not ideal, but better.

If neither of these work acceptably, email customer support.

This worked like a charm, thank you. For some reason it was set to russian???? I don't even use Russian. :psyduck:

# ? Jun 8, 2017 19:39

crabrock: Aug 2, 2002; I

AM

MAGNIFICENT

pretty soon we all will

# ? Jun 8, 2017 23:32

FormerPoster: Aug 5, 2004; Hair Elf

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

They are classics (and ones I can easily c/p off the internet). Feel free to add some modern examples that you think are more relevant.

Sorry I never responded to this. Truth is, I don't really have a response because I don't know what the gently caress I'm talking about. I'm just so frustrated with my own experience of trying to get published that I'm lashing out at any kind of advice from anyone as a way to make myself feel better. You're doing a good job with this thread, so I'm sorry for coming in/making GBS threads on/walking out. Keep doing your best to help people and ignore posters like me

# ? Jun 12, 2017 05:34

Dr. Kloctopussy: Apr 22, 2003; "It's time....to DIE!"

Naerasa posted:

Sorry I never responded to this. Truth is, I don't really have a response because I don't know what the gently caress I'm talking about. I'm just so frustrated with my own experience of trying to get published that I'm lashing out at any kind of advice from anyone as a way to make myself feel better. You're doing a good job with this thread, so I'm sorry for coming in/making GBS threads on/walking out. Keep doing your best to help people and ignore posters like me

We have all been there. Anyway, I've been meaning to find and post some more recent examples, because I think they would be a good addition. But then work and life. :11tea:

Also snarky discussion is better than no discussion.

# ? Jun 12, 2017 08:07

Astian: Jun 16, 2001

I recently finished a novel of around 60k words and am looking for feedback. Does anyone with their own completed book want to do a critique exchange? Mine is literary fiction based in Cambodia. I'd prefer to read literary, but upmarket or other adult fiction would be great too.

# ? Jun 14, 2017 16:25

Sitting Here: Dec 31, 2007

Astian posted:

I recently finished a novel of around 60k words and am looking for feedback. Does anyone with their own completed book want to do a critique exchange? Mine is literary fiction based in Cambodia. I'd prefer to read literary, but upmarket or other adult fiction would be great too.

I know Anime Was Right was posting looking for some kind of exchange, don't know if the lengths of the pieces match up, though. If he sees this maybe you guys can swap?

Otherwise lol give me like 6 more months...maybe a year.... :negative:

# ? Jun 14, 2017 18:28

FluxFaun: Apr 7, 2010

why do I use so many commas

# ? Jun 14, 2017 20:09

anime was right: Jun 27, 2008; death is certain
keep yr cool

Sitting Here posted:

I know Anime Was Right was posting looking for some kind of exchange, don't know if the lengths of the pieces match up, though. If he sees this maybe you guys can swap?

Otherwise lol give me like 6 more months...maybe a year....

around 70k words, ya fantasy, specifically

# ? Jun 14, 2017 21:37

Dr. Kloctopussy: Apr 22, 2003; "It's time....to DIE!"

anime was right posted:

around 70k words, ya fantasy, specifically

Lol if you have another one in like a year I'll trade with you

# ? Jun 14, 2017 23:47

anime was right: Jun 27, 2008; death is certain
keep yr cool

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

Lol if you have another one in like a year I'll trade with you

good news! i'm pretty close to done with another one

# ? Jun 15, 2017 00:47

CantDecideOnAName: Jan 1, 2012; And I understand if you ask
Was this life,
was this all?

I'd offer to trade but I'm the worst editor in the world and I'm not willing to put up if I can't give back proper.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 05:47

Dr. Kloctopussy: Apr 22, 2003; "It's time....to DIE!"

CantDecideOnAName posted:

I'd offer to trade but I'm the worst editor in the world and I'm not willing to put up if I can't give back proper.

This brings up a good point, actually. Before you trade novels, you probably want to have a conversation of what kind of feedback you are looking for. It would suck to give someone a line-by-line edit and you just get a page of thoughts. And it would suck to get a line-by-line if what you really wanted was someone's overall thoughts on plot, characters, how it he'd their interest, etc.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 06:31

Zaepho: Oct 31, 2013

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

This brings up a good point, actually. Before you trade novels, you probably want to have a conversation of what kind of feedback you are looking for. It would suck to give someone a line-by-line edit and you just get a page of thoughts. And it would suck to get a line-by-line if what you really wanted was someone's overall thoughts on plot, characters, how it he'd their interest, etc.

In my mind this would be the difference between a Beta Read, Developmental Edit and Copy Edit.

In my eyes, Beta Read is really about impressions. What did you like/not like? What worked? what didn't work? What may have left you confused? Did it feel like it drug on and on before getting to the good stuff? Was there some character that you hated that you were supposed to like? Beta Readers can really be anyone. Best if they are somebody in your target market/demo if possible (harder to accomplish well with YA and Middle Grade)

Developmental edit is basically a more in depth version of a Beta Read typically with somebody who does editing professionally. Really seeks to handle pacing, removing all the stuff you had to write but the reader doesn't need to read, filling in those plot holes, etc.

Copy Editing aka "Learn to Comma Motherfucker". This is all punctuation, grammar, spelling, finding all the places you typed "the" twice but couldn't see because your brain made the duplicate disappear. The more OCD the Copy Editor the better.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 15:42

Astian: Jun 16, 2001

Zaepho posted:

In my mind this would be the difference between a Beta Read, Developmental Edit and Copy Edit.

In my eyes, Beta Read is really about impressions. What did you like/not like? What worked? what didn't work? What may have left you confused? Did it feel like it drug on and on before getting to the good stuff? Was there some character that you hated that you were supposed to like? Beta Readers can really be anyone. Best if they are somebody in your target market/demo if possible (harder to accomplish well with YA and Middle Grade)

Developmental edit is basically a more in depth version of a Beta Read typically with somebody who does editing professionally. Really seeks to handle pacing, removing all the stuff you had to write but the reader doesn't need to read, filling in those plot holes, etc.

Copy Editing aka "Learn to Comma Motherfucker". This is all punctuation, grammar, spelling, finding all the places you typed "the" twice but couldn't see because your brain made the duplicate disappear. The more OCD the Copy Editor the better.

Thanks for this. I'm looking for, and offering, a developmental edit. The first 2/3 of my novel has been professionally edited, so line edits will probably only be necessary for the last 65 pages or so. I've been doing fiction workshops for the better part of ten years, so I'm pretty confident in my critiques.

Still, I don't think I could give really good feedback for YA, and probably genre fiction as well, since I don't read very much of it. If someone has a literary, upmarket, or literary genre fiction (like Le Guin, maybe Chabon) I'd love to exchange. If someone comes around with such a novel (or short story collection), please send me a PM, since I'm worried I'll lose track of this thread!

# ? Jun 15, 2017 18:05

CantDecideOnAName: Jan 1, 2012; And I understand if you ask
Was this life,
was this all?

This thread is stickied, I wouldn't worry about losing track of it. But if you are that worried, you can always bookmark it.

Developmental is the one I struggle with in both writing and reading and where all my insecurity with writing comes from. I can't recognize pacing issues in my own work, much less someone else's.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 18:53

Zaepho: Oct 31, 2013

CantDecideOnAName posted:

This thread is stickied, I wouldn't worry about losing track of it. But if you are that worried, you can always bookmark it.

Developmental is the one I struggle with in both writing and reading and where all my insecurity with writing comes from. I can't recognize pacing issues in my own work, much less someone else's.

This is where an Agent or an Editor from the publisher comes into play. Work it, revise it, use beta readers, and especially get the first couple chapters in tip top shape. Then start querying publishers and agents while you work on the next project.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 19:03

FluxFaun: Apr 7, 2010

what're the main differences between a western and a southern gothic? besides the obvious more rooty tooty point n shooty of a western, I mean. I'm writing what I'd tenatively call a southern gothic, but other people are calling it a supernatural western. Not sure what the gently caress to label it. I feel like I should have some kinda label on it, for when I finally get the drat thing done so I can pitch it to the right publishers

# ? Jun 15, 2017 19:12

Dr. Kloctopussy: Apr 22, 2003; "It's time....to DIE!"

Zaepho posted:

This is where an Agent or an Editor from the publisher comes into play. Work it, revise it, use beta readers, and especially get the first couple chapters in tip top shape. Then start querying publishers and agents while you work on the next project.

There are also freelance editors who you can hire to do this, if you so desire.

With respect to the categories of editing, I think they are a good starting off place, and your descriptions are good. But you should still have a more detailed discussion of expectations before trading with other writers....

anime was right posted:

around 70k words, ya fantasy, specifically

This is my jam, actually, so once I'm less busy with work, I can beta-read it.

Dr. Kloctopussy fucked around with this message at 19:17 on Jun 15, 2017

# ? Jun 15, 2017 19:15

Zaepho: Oct 31, 2013

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

There are also freelance editors who you can hire to do this, if you so desire.

With respect to the categories of editing, I think they are a good starting off place, and your descriptions are good. But you should still have a more detailed discussion of expectations before trading with other writers....

That's a very good point. Always best to lay out expectations up front so nobody is surprised or put out.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 19:18

Djeser: Mar 22, 2013; it's crow time again

Sociopastry posted:

what're the main differences between a western and a southern gothic? besides the obvious more rooty tooty point n shooty of a western, I mean. I'm writing what I'd tenatively call a southern gothic, but other people are calling it a supernatural western. Not sure what the gently caress to label it. I feel like I should have some kinda label on it, for when I finally get the drat thing done so I can pitch it to the right publishers

The broad themes of a western are more about Humanity and The Wilderness, whether that's literal wilderness or metaphorical wilderness where the law doesn't reach. Southern Gothic is about aging authority and elegant facades. In a western, authority comes from practical power, while in a southern gothic, authority comes from tradition.

The way it divides up in my mind is that a western is new/untamed/wild while southern gothic is old/rotting/ornate.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 21:05

FluxFaun: Apr 7, 2010

Thank you- then I guess it's kinda a hybrid? It's mostly exploring how authority corrupts and why law doesn't equal justice, but there's not a ton of shooting (yet) or explorations of might=power. I don't know. My beta readers were calling it a western but they're not trained in literature or anything, they're just nice peeps who are beta reading for me.

I'm gonna need a copy editor and developmental reader later on, but I don't think that's gonna be for a while yet.

I'm averaging about 1,000 words a day/writing session. Is this low? It seems like I should be writing more but 1,000 is all my brain will poo poo out before it decides to stop with the ideas.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 21:25

After The War: Apr 12, 2005; to all of my Architects
let me be traitor

Sociopastry posted:

what're the main differences between a western and a southern gothic? besides the obvious more rooty tooty point n shooty of a western, I mean. I'm writing what I'd tenatively call a southern gothic, but other people are calling it a supernatural western. Not sure what the gently caress to label it. I feel like I should have some kinda label on it, for when I finally get the drat thing done so I can pitch it to the right publishers

Besides the expected setting and trappings, Westerns generally feature a series of events (usually a confrontation between two or more entities) over a small window of time. The story centers around the conflict and how it�s resolved, which is why Westerns work so well episodically. Emphasis will be on the characters� own history and choices, rarely going back more than a generation - the journey west is the process of becoming anew.

Southern Gothics center around grotesque or macabre characters, with the conflict smaller-scale, possibly purely internal. Where the Western will take place in new(ish) settlements on the frontier, a Southern Gothic setting will be long-established, probably to the point of decay. Family histories run long, and are full of secrets, shame, and guilt. Forces operate beyond the characters control, even awareness, and there is constant tension between tradition and individual identity.

Who are your characters, and what�s the central conflict? What are some other things that evoke the tone you�re going for?

(I love talking about genre, and this would have been a much longer post if I wasn�t sneaky-typing at work.)

E,FB (but again, typing from work)

# ? Jun 15, 2017 21:28

CantDecideOnAName: Jan 1, 2012; And I understand if you ask
Was this life,
was this all?

After The War, if you ever want to do a big genre breakdown effortpost, I would love to read it.

Sociopastry: I think 1k a day is pretty good output. That's way better than I'm doing.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 21:43

Dr. Kloctopussy: Apr 22, 2003; "It's time....to DIE!"

Read a bunch of westerns, then a bunch of southern gothics, then decide.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 21:46

FluxFaun: Apr 7, 2010

that's actually super interesting, and once you're off work I'd love to hear more about genre. I'll admit I'm a fairly new writer- and while I'm a voracious reader, I never really studied genre in depths until very recently once I decided that drat it, I'm writing a book.

the setting is this:

supernatural southwest, magic is a thing that exists, but not a ton of people can use it. spirits/ghosts are a well known thing and the dead don't lay easy without the help of people who can work with them to help them pass on. the town the story is set in is currently beset by a mysterious illness that's causing otherwise young and healthy people to drop dead. no one know's what's causing it, and it seems like it's only people on the less wealthy side of town. The old money has so far been unaffected. The mayor's hired a bunch of fancy doctors but so far nothing's been found. The spirits of the dead are more restless and dangerous than they've ever been.

So my characters are thus:

we have a bounty hunter/sort of lone ranger type of woman who feels the weight of duty heavy on her shoulders. She can't leave people suffering and especially distrusts authority and the law in general. She comes from a smallish homestead that got wrecked by bandits and hasn't ever confronted the trauma it left her with, besides throwing herself fully into helping others, often at risk of her own life. She's never found the bandits responsible and doesn't think she ever will.

we have a gravedigger/spirit worker who's tired of this whole mess and just wants the dead to rest easy. friendly, open, but generally distrusted/disliked by the town due to the nature of her work. unable to find out why these people are dropping dead and having trouble keeping the spirits under control.

a young woman who's magically sensitive, meaning she has latent ability but hasn't actually figured that out yet. old money, is worried about the town and especially worried about her maid/friend who lives on the poor side of town and is at risk of sickness. also betrothed to the mayor's son and isn't super pleased about that.

the mayor, a nice old man. comes from old money, the title of mayor's been in his family for generations at this point. seems to be throwing money at the problem, but not actively concerned about the illness plaguing the town. willing to do anything to keep his family well-kept and comfortable.

the mayor's son, arrogant, ambitious, childish. is used to getting what he wants and gets very angry if he doesn't.

the themes I want to explore are that greed and authority are a recipe for corruption. There's a second underlying theme of law =/= justice going on that kinda snuck in there.

so far, the mood has been one of fertile/healthy things gone to rot/corrupted.

e: the main conflict's obviously the illness/cause of the illness

# ? Jun 15, 2017 21:47

FluxFaun: Apr 7, 2010

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

Read a bunch of westerns, then a bunch of southern gothics, then decide.

In the process of doing so. So far I'm leaning towards southen gothic, but like I said, it's kinda a hybrid, or at least my beta readers seem to think so.

also I gotta stop using so many commas goddamn

# ? Jun 15, 2017 21:51

After The War: Apr 12, 2005; to all of my Architects
let me be traitor

Sociopastry posted:

that's actually super interesting, and once you're off work I'd love to hear more about genre.

I'll do something when I can, after work I'm practicing with a band as a fill-in bassist because their previous guy ventured west to Become Anew. Will want to reread your summary a few more times, but at the moment I'd probably call it Western Fantasy, in that magic is something comprehensible and accessible, if only by a few. Supernatural/horror (to me) usually means things incomprehensible to our characters, existing outside their worldview. There's also an alternate history/secret history aspect (which depends on how much your changes have affected the world at large) , there's a lot of fun to be had with that.

But really, these are just vague guidelines for internal tone consistency and to help find new inspirational material. It's your story and goes the way you want, just focus on getting it out at the speed you feel comfortable.

More (hopefully) coherent ramblings when I'm not running out the door!

(If it helps, "Western" as a term covers a whole lot of ground, versus "Southern Gothic", which is something pretty specific. It would be interesting to see a classic Southern Gothic in the world you're building, but it would have a different conflict with a different cast of characters.)

# ? Jun 15, 2017 22:10

FluxFaun: Apr 7, 2010

Thank you, that's very interesting and actually helps me look at my work from a different lens. Western Fantasy sounds both like a good genre and a kickass band name.

I doubt this will be the last book I write, because I've found that I really loving enjoy writing. maybe once this book is finished and I've read a lot more southern gothic I'll rip open this world with that genre instead.

Really looking forward to that genre post. Anyone have some reccs for video essays on genre? I say video essays because I'd like to put it on while I cook dinner tonight, but actual essays would be welcome, too.

# ? Jun 15, 2017 22:14

sebmojo: Oct 23, 2010; Legit Cyberpunk

Westerns are about the future eating the present, southern gothic is about the past eating the present.

sebmojo fucked around with this message at 23:57 on Jun 15, 2017

# ? Jun 15, 2017 23:47

crabrock: Aug 2, 2002; I

AM

MAGNIFICENT

what about steampunk?

# ? Jun 15, 2017 23:48

neongrey: Feb 28, 2007; Plaguing your posts with incidental music.

crabrock posted:

what about steampunk?

that's about costuming

# ? Jun 15, 2017 23:49

SurreptitiousMuffin: Mar 21, 2010

*sees a child get their hand torn off in an industrial accident*

"man, top hats are the poo poo"

# ? Jun 15, 2017 23:53

FunkyAl: Mar 28, 2010; Your vitals soar.

Hello fiction writing thread, I wrote a Frasier Fan Fiction, please enjoy

quote:

Sheriff Niles - A Cheers/Frasier Expanded Universe Fanfiction

Niles sat on the precipice of the cliff and let out a long, satisfied breath. The sun was setting over the little old west town he had come to call home, drenching the sand in red and orange, interrupted by the cool winding shadows of rock formations both near and in the distance. It had been a big change, leaving his old life as a psychiatrist and coming here in his brother Frasier�s time machine, but he had never been happier.

He would never forget the day it had arrived. He was at Frasier�s apartment, watching TV with his Father and Daphne. Daphne. He still thought about her, but every time he did he was slightly ashamed at how long it had been. Ever since he had fallen in love with that whore from the saloon and had sex for the first time it had changed his life immeasurably. Frasier had been embroiled in a conflict with a caller on his radio show, someone who had called Frasier a �big doody,� and of course had shanghaied his closest family members into helping him resolve the issue. In a moment that had seemed to last an instant and stech into forever, the room was filled with a brilliant flash of light, every color of the spectrum and yet its very own. The light vanished and in its stead was a mahogany box the size of a closet that was puffing odorless purple smoke out of an exhaust pipe on its side.

Out came Frasier, drenched in blood. Frasier, of course, was still where he was moments ago, mouth now agape, staring at this new Frasier wildly. But new was the wrong word to describe him, the Frasier that stepped out of this box was grey and overgrown, his skin wrinkled and spotted, his red hangdog eyes drinking in the scene. He seemed distant from this place now, estranged from his idiom. He sniffed the air and approached his doppelg�nger. He whispered something in his ear, and then turned to the rest of the room and announced that the time machine he had come into now belonged to them, to do with whatever they saw fit. He then sloped toward the door, patted Eddie on the head, and rode down the elevator, never to be seen by anyone in that room again.
It started small at first. After the initial shock wore off, Frasier took the opportunity to take his family on a tour through his glory days at Cheers. The young barflies took an interest, and a couple of them ended up joining them on their further adventures through history. These were wonderful days to be sure, seeing King Lear performed by Shakespeare�s company, �running into� Sigmund Freud and had a wonderful, mind expanding discussion, standing on the stony and firey surface of an earth still millions of years from supporting life.

Time Travel quickly wears on a person, however, and after a (relative) year of timehopping Niles and a few of the others had expressed a desire to settle down for a while. Niles had won a deed to a small town in the old west in a poker game some months back, and thought it a good opportunity to create a community for this group of people who no longer seemed to fit anywhere else in space and time. He became the sheriff, a role he was surprised at how easily he fit into. His father would have been proud, had he not gone insane shortly after seeing the two Frasiers in the same room at the same time.

He had put Carla in charge of the saloon, a place not unlike Cheers, and with much of the same clientele, with the important distinction that the clientele was made up of �time variants� of the regulars. Carla herself was 80 years old and completely bald. Woody was still in his prime, lifting casks and crates and ranching in his off time. Four Norms from four times each sat at their own corner of the bar. Cliff had died during one of their adventures, but they had uploaded a copy of his consciousness to a wisecracking computer console that stood in the corner and answered any trivia question you could ask it, much to the chagrin of Carla, who had only ever really liked Cliff for his sexual availability whenever those times came that her husband would show up, impregnate and abandon her. Sam �Mayday� Malone had also died, of an advanced future STD that made his body collapse in on itself and turned his bones into chalk. Coach was alive and puttering around though, so that was nice.
Some of their friends from Seattle had come along as well, although Niles did not like to think about that too much. Roz was of course doing fine, taking the opportunity to become the promiscuous gunslinging outlaw she seemed to have been destined to become. But Gil Chesterton did not make it through the winter, having refused to adjust his lifestyle to the hard conditions of the desert, and he had had to hang �Bulldog� Briscoe for the unspeakable time crimes he had committed, crimes so severe they cannot bear repeating here. Niles wondered often if they would ever know the extent of the damage he had caused, at one time theorizing that the root of man�s evil could be traced back to the Bulldog. He had not seen Frasier in over ten years.

It would soon be too dark to safely climb down the mountain and back into town, so Niles stood up, brushed off his pants, and began his walk. Just then, time froze and Niles� eyes were filled with a brilliant symphony of light that he knew could only mean one thing. He approached the smoking time machine. A mustached man who was just around fifty years out of step with time stepped out. Niles felt that he had seen this man somewhere before, that he knew him in some way.

�Dr. Crane?� the man asked.

�Yes, that�s me,� Niles replied.

H.G. Wells shot Niles in the stomach and went back into his time machine.

---

H.G. Wells knew this day had been coming for years. That was nothing new, he had known practically everything that was going to happen for longer than he hadn�t, but today felt different. He felt a sick feeling in his gut, but there was a relief to it. He would no longer be burdened by the weight of all time and soon he would be able to freely rejoin it. He checked his watch. Any second now.

The room filled with light and a haggard, hardened man with wild grey hair strode out of the time machine. Wells squinted. The long forgotten sensation of uncertainty began to creep up through his spine. This couldn�t be it, this couldn�t be the man who was supposed to be here. He had to be sure.

�Dr. Crane?� H.G. Wells asked.

�Yes, that�s me,� Frasier replied.

Frasier shot H.G. Wells in the stomach, crossed the room to the original time machine, and disappeared.

# ? Jun 16, 2017 00:54

sebmojo: Oct 23, 2010; Legit Cyberpunk

FunkyAl posted:

Sheriff Niles - A Cheers/Frasier Expanded Universe Fanfiction

Niles sat on the precipice of the cliff and let out a long, satisfied breath. The sun was setting over the little old west town he had come to call home, drenching the sand in red and orange, interrupted by the cool winding shadows of rock formations both near and in the distance. It had been a big change, leaving his old life as a psychiatrist and coming here in his brother Frasier�s time machine, but he had never been happier.

He would never forget the day it had arrived. He was at Frasier�s apartment, watching TV with his Father and Daphne. Daphne. He still thought about her, but every time he did he was slightly ashamed at how long it had been. Ever since he had fallen in love with that whore from the saloon and had sex for the first time it had changed his life immeasurably. Frasier had been embroiled in a conflict with a caller on his radio show, someone who had called Frasier a �big doody,� and of course had shanghaied his closest family members into helping him resolve the issue. In a moment that had seemed to last an instant and stech into forever, the room was filled with a brilliant flash of light, every color of the spectrum and yet its very own. The light vanished and in its stead was a mahogany box the size of a closet that was puffing odorless purple smoke out of an exhaust pipe on its side.

Out came Frasier, drenched in blood. Frasier, of course, was still where he was moments ago, mouth now agape, staring at this new Frasier wildly. But new was the wrong word to describe him, the Frasier that stepped out of this box was grey and overgrown, his skin wrinkled and spotted, his red hangdog eyes drinking in the scene. He seemed distant from this place now, estranged from his idiom. He sniffed the air and approached his doppelg�nger. He whispered something in his ear, and then turned to the rest of the room and announced that the time machine he had come into now belonged to them, to do with whatever they saw fit. He then sloped toward the door, patted Eddie on the head, and rode down the elevator, never to be seen by anyone in that room again.
It started small at first. After the initial shock wore off, Frasier took the opportunity to take his family on a tour through his glory days at Cheers. The young barflies took an interest, and a couple of them ended up joining them on their further adventures through history. These were wonderful days to be sure, seeing King Lear performed by Shakespeare�s company, �running into� Sigmund Freud and had a wonderful, mind expanding discussion, standing on the stony and firey surface of an earth still millions of years from supporting life.

Time Travel quickly wears on a person, however, and after a (relative) year of timehopping Niles and a few of the others had expressed a desire to settle down for a while. Niles had won a deed to a small town in the old west in a poker game some months back, and thought it a good opportunity to create a community for this group of people who no longer seemed to fit anywhere else in space and time. He became the sheriff, a role he was surprised at how easily he fit into. His father would have been proud, had he not gone insane shortly after seeing the two Frasiers in the same room at the same time.

He had put Carla in charge of the saloon, a place not unlike Cheers, and with much of the same clientele, with the important distinction that the clientele was made up of �time variants� of the regulars. Carla herself was 80 years old and completely bald. Woody was still in his prime, lifting casks and crates and ranching in his off time. Four Norms from four times each sat at their own corner of the bar. Cliff had died during one of their adventures, but they had uploaded a copy of his consciousness to a wisecracking computer console that stood in the corner and answered any trivia question you could ask it, much to the chagrin of Carla, who had only ever really liked Cliff for his sexual availability whenever those times came that her husband would show up, impregnate and abandon her. Sam �Mayday� Malone had also died, of an advanced future STD that made his body collapse in on itself and turned his bones into chalk. Coach was alive and puttering around though, so that was nice.
Some of their friends from Seattle had come along as well, although Niles did not like to think about that too much. Roz was of course doing fine, taking the opportunity to become the promiscuous gunslinging outlaw she seemed to have been destined to become. But Gil Chesterton did not make it through the winter, having refused to adjust his lifestyle to the hard conditions of the desert, and he had had to hang �Bulldog� Briscoe for the unspeakable time crimes he had committed, crimes so severe they cannot bear repeating here. Niles wondered often if they would ever know the extent of the damage he had caused, at one time theorizing that the root of man�s evil could be traced back to the Bulldog. He had not seen Frasier in over ten years.

It would soon be too dark to safely climb down the mountain and back into town, so Niles stood up, brushed off his pants, and began his walk. Just then, time froze and Niles� eyes were filled with a brilliant symphony of light that he knew could only mean one thing. He approached the smoking time machine. A mustached man who was just around fifty years out of step with time stepped out. Niles felt that he had seen this man somewhere before, that he knew him in some way.

�Dr. Crane?� the man asked.

�Yes, that�s me,� Niles replied.

H.G. Wells shot Niles in the stomach and went back into his time machine.

---

H.G. Wells knew this day had been coming for years. That was nothing new, he had known practically everything that was going to happen for longer than he hadn�t, but today felt different. He felt a sick feeling in his gut, but there was a relief to it. He would no longer be burdened by the weight of all time and soon he would be able to freely rejoin it. He checked his watch. Any second now.

The room filled with light and a haggard, hardened man with wild grey hair strode out of the time machine. Wells squinted. The long forgotten sensation of uncertainty began to creep up through his spine. This couldn�t be it, this couldn�t be the man who was supposed to be here. He had to be sure.

�Dr. Crane?� H.G. Wells asked.

�Yes, that�s me,� Frasier replied.

Frasier shot H.G. Wells in the stomach, crossed the room to the original time machine, and disappeared.

don't sign your posts

# ? Jun 16, 2017 01:31

Dr. Kloctopussy: Apr 22, 2003; "It's time....to DIE!"

FunkyAl posted:

Hello fiction writing thread, I wrote a Frasier Fan Fiction, please enjoy

Ugh, someone didn't read the first post

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

Welcome to the Fiction Writing Advice (and general discussion) thread!

Writing fiction is hard, frustrating, fun, and rewarding, and it is awesome that you are doing it (or thinking of doing it)! This thread is the place for you to ask and answer all sorts of questions regarding fiction writing. Also to post all your successes and (if you feel like it) failures, and get appropriately enthusiastic and encouraging responses. Also possibly appropriate and enthusiastic critiques. It�s a good place to engage in dialogue with other people who are writing fiction, at all levels of �accomplishment� or whatever.

Chances are good that by the time you are reading this thread, it will be very long and you just won�t have the time to read the entire thing. That is fine! No one really expects you to.� Please do us all the favor of reading AT LEAST THIS FIRST loving POST FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

---

4) IF YOU WANT FEEDBACK:

If you want advice on specific things you are writing, you have a couple options. If it�s just a few sentences, you can post it in here. If it�s 1000 words or less, it goes in the Fiction Farm. If it�s longer than that, start a new thread. You can link here and ask for crits. Never ever ever post something that you haven�t already read and revised yourself.