/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

Lonely Virgil: Oct 9, 2012

Haifisch posted:

On a less note:

Parents are mad at me [18f] for taking one day off work. Are they right?

Goddamn millennials, have they no company loyalty? - Her parents, probably, as their pensions are circling down the toilet.

# ? Jul 4, 2017 22:35

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# ? May 27, 2024 09:12

Hello Ketene: Dec 30, 2011

It's hard to tell who was in the wrong during the 'incident' since he's so vague about it, but throughout the text he definitely paints his wife as a very petty person at best.

# ? Jul 4, 2017 22:40

Larry Parrish: Jul 9, 2012; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Motherfucker posted:

I get that its a very black thing, you don't wanna move some place else only to find your neighbors are all leery eyed walking to the other side of the street when you pass vandalizing your mailbox secret KKK

Are you loving retarded or what

# ? Jul 4, 2017 22:41

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Haifisch posted:

On a less note:

Parents are mad at me [18f] for taking one day off work. Are they right?

My parents are completely shaming me now and won't even speak to me today. They told me they aren't sure if they are going to let me go to my real moms house tonight because I told my work no. They told me they are extremely mad at me.

She's 18, so that would be an interesting trick.

Depending on how they enforce that ultimatum she may be able to legally deck them

# ? Jul 4, 2017 22:48

Lonely Virgil: Oct 9, 2012

maskenfreiheit posted:

She's 18, so that would be an interesting trick.

Depending on how they enforce that ultimatum she may be able to legally deck them

Knowing controlling parents, they're gonna shove all her poo poo on the lawn (if they're nice) and change the locks when she get's back from her mom's.

# ? Jul 4, 2017 22:55

Space Kablooey: May 6, 2009

Haifisch posted:

On a less note:

Parents are mad at me [18f] for taking one day off work. Are they right?

# ? Jul 4, 2017 23:00

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

My father (43M) has thrown away two families; one being mine (19F) and the other a secret

quote:

Hi everyone, I thought I would post here because I don't know if I'm reacting to this properly, or if there is even a proper way to react to such a situation. I just thought it would be beneficial to read some unbiased opinions. This is going to be long, I'm sorry.

So about 3 months ago, my mom accused my father of cheating based on solid evidence. He was continuously overprotective of his phone, suddenly started hanging out with "friends" and "family" (he doesn't have friends and doesn't speak to his family), not coming home at night, and taking much longer than necessary to pick me up/drop me off at school.

After months of witnessing his strange behaviour, she finally confronted him about it. He was immediately defensive and began gaslighting her, calling her crazy and telling her everything is her fault because she is unhappy. My sisters and I all saw through this. We had been suspicious ourselves for quite some time due to what was previously mentioned and his online activity (frequently friending sleazy women on facebook). We decided to stand up for our mom, knowing she was being emotionally abused and manipulated.

When this all came out, I was in the process of exams so I had to go back to school (lived in residence) and wasn't able to support my mom while the situation continued to unravel. My sister kept me updated that night and, to our surprise, the situation got worse.

We found out that my father has 2 older daughters... aged 22 and 21 (my mom knew this though). For context, I am 19, my sister is 18, my other sister is 17, and my brother is even younger. It was also stated that my mom has had multiple abortions throughout our childhoods and even before I was born.

We discovered that my father has cheated on my mom many other times, always making up bullshit excuses. My mom knew but stayed because she relied on him financially... a mistake I will never make. We went to food banks (I never realized this) and have always been broke because my father could never hold a job, he thinks he's too good to work under anyone.

The worst part is that he keeps lying about everything and never sat my mom or my sisters and I down and told us the truth. He never apologized. He thinks it wasn't cheating because it was an unhappy marriage.

So, my sisters and I have decided to ban him from our lives and never contact him again. My brother is too young to make an informed decision. He is now living at the woman's house (the one he's recently been cheating on my mom with) and thinks he's on vacation or something. He even changed his relationship status on facebook to "married to {woman's name}"... and lied to our faces that he's in a romantic relationship with her.

Okay I'm going to stop ranting now. So reddit, am I unreasonable for never wanting to speak to this guy again? Any thoughts would be appreciated.

tldr; My father cheated on my mom and I have two half-sisters I never knew about. Am I crazy for never wanting to see him again?

# ? Jul 4, 2017 23:02

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Lonely Virgil posted:

Knowing controlling parents, they're gonna shove all her poo poo on the lawn (if they're nice) and change the locks when she get's back from her mom's.

this is why you get a DL with your parent's house on it to prove residency

then you can sue them

:getin:

# ? Jul 4, 2017 23:05

Drunk Nerds: Jan 25, 2011; Just close your eyes; Fun Shoe

From the "wife booked vacation during my mom's visit"

I found this a very telling clause:

"She still forces me to go"

Kind of implies mom is controlling and also wife is controlling and they only have one piece to control so they butt heads about it. Also implies wife is a bitch and husband is a doormat

# ? Jul 4, 2017 23:42

Lonely Virgil: Oct 9, 2012

maskenfreiheit posted:

this is why you get a DL with your parent's house on it to prove residency

then you can sue them

Many 18 year olds don't know that have rights as tenants. Every bad parent topic on reddit has some flavor of "I was 22 and had a 10 pm curfew or else I'd be kicked out" or "My mom made me sleep on the streets when I was 15."

Some kids who grew up with overbearing parents don't want to rock the boat by not letting themselves be parented as an adult.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 00:21

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

maskenfreiheit posted:

this is why you get a DL with your parent's house on it to prove residency

then you can sue them

Good luck finding a cop to enforce it.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 00:22

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

The real problem is with how incredibly awkward it'd be until you moved out/they (properly) evicted you.

BF[42M] of six months broke into my home when I[36F] didn't answer my phone for a day. Am I over reacting?

quote:

I'm not even sure what all to write here. I think I'm still taken back and confused by this morning.

I forgot my phone at my parents place yesterday. I'm not someone who is too attached to their phone, I don't always remember to bring it with or charge it and whatever. Forgetting I set it down somewhere is pretty common. So when I realized I'd left it at my parents place I decided I'd come get it today.

But this morning I woke up at around 6am to my boyfriend shaking me and asking if I was okay. When I told him I was fine and asked what he was doing here he said he couldn't get in touch with me all night and was concerned that I was hurt or needed help. Then he told me how he'd broken into my house to check on me.

I feel like I want to break up with him now. I feel like even though he had good intentions, he's violated the security of my home. I'm a hardcore introvert with anxiety issues, my house is my safe place. I get to say who and what comes in, who and what has to leave. To have that control pushed aside by someone I've only been dating a few months seems like a huge red flag.

But he insists he only did it because he was worried. And that partners are supposed to worry about each other and check on them. Honestly, he's drowning me in sentiments about how much he cares and I just feel like I'm walking a path where everything I do is going to be monitored and controlled by him.

tl;dr He broke into my home because I wasn't answering my phone. I feel violated and am worried this is a sign he's controlling. Am I overreacting?

# ? Jul 5, 2017 00:29

Day Man: Jul 30, 2007; Champion of the Sun!

Master of karate and friendship...
for everyone!

Haifisch posted:

The real problem is with how incredibly awkward it'd be until you moved out/they (properly) evicted you.

BF[42M] of six months broke into my home when I[36F] didn't answer my phone for a day. Am I over reacting?

Couldn't try the doorbell??

# ? Jul 5, 2017 00:51

Lonely Virgil: Oct 9, 2012

Haifisch posted:

The real problem is with how incredibly awkward it'd be until you moved out/they (properly) evicted you.

BF[42M] of six months broke into my home when I[36F] didn't answer my phone for a day. Am I over reacting?

Some twitch streamer went dark for a whole day during E3, people on twitter lost their loving minds and decided she was kidnapped or dead. People forget that not even 15 years ago everyone didn't have tiny computers in their pockets all the time that beeped and booped when someone wants to talk to you.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 00:58

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

The best part:

OP posted:

We aren't in constant contact. We talk maybe once a day, might text a little in the morning. But he knew I would be with my family until late last night, and he knows I'm flaky with my phone. Thats why it feels off.

OP's not even one of those people who texts their SO every two minutes. And her boyfriend flipped a poo poo over her not answering for ~12 hours(including hours where normal people are asleep).

:sever:

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:01

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Lonely Virgil posted:

Some twitch streamer went dark for a whole day during E3, people on twitter lost their loving minds and decided she was kidnapped or dead. People forget that not even 15 years ago everyone didn't have tiny computers in their pockets all the time that beeped and booped when someone wants to talk to you.

Even better, a bunch of people with frog avatars on twitter decided she must be purposely going silent to pretend she was kidnapped/murdered for attention, and when she was neither kidnapped nor dead, decided that was proof they were right :jerkbag:

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:02

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

Danaru posted:

Even better, a bunch of people with frog avatars on twitter decided she must be purposely going silent to pretend she was kidnapped/murdered for attention, and when she was neither kidnapped nor dead, decided that was proof they were right

yeah, 4g (and 3g) end up saturated at pretty much any trade show i've been to.

the frogs would know this if they left the house

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:05

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

straight girl here; i have the hots for my gay best friend.

quote:

So here's the deal. One of my very best friends is very attractive to me, but he happens to be gay. We've known each other for about four years now and we probably see each other at least every other day. I can tell that he cares a lot about me, in little things he does, and I suppose that kind of emotional security (and the fact that he's pretty cute) has led me to crave a physical relationship with him. In other words, I want to bang him. Badly. But, I'm pretty sure that would be either physically impossible or just uncomfortable and weird.

What the heck can I do to get over that and just get back to being platonic buddies with him?

The moderator who banned me from /r/relationships suggests:

quote:

Wake him up with a BJ.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:12

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

Go big or go home

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:15

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Somehow an /r/relationships mod advocating rape doesn't surprise me as much as I thought it would

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:23

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

Jim Barris posted:

I've never been good at letting go of things. Did you spend most of your formative years in the same place?

yeah actually. I've never ever had a problem with it even as a little kid. To be fair where I grew up was a shithole as well and moving away was really really good for me and my family so??

Larry Parrish posted:

Are you loving retarded or what

hey its a legit concern.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:25

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO: Feb 28, 1985

maskenfreiheit posted:

The moderator who banned me from /r/relationships suggests:

So you got banned by someone advocating sexual assault. Good work, Reddit.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:27

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Neighbor [28 F] copies how I dress [26 F] and now she's telling people that I'm the one who copies her

quote:

My neighbor doesn't speak to me. Her personality is a bit childish. She likes to tease people so I'm perfectly fine with being distant from her. She does like to stare at me when I'm outside though. When she moved into the neighborhood all she wore was gym clothes. Gym clothes every single day for almost a year straight. She's a bit of a tomboy so I didn't think anything of it, everyone has their own taste. I consider myself a fashionista so I'm always dressed nice. The mirroring started off small, I wore my hair in a messy bun and she followed. I dyed my hair, she did the same. I parted my hair to the side, she did too. My other neighbor started adding fuel to the fire by always telling me that she's copying me. I don't actually look outside to see what my neighbor is wearing, the only reason I know what she's wearing is because my other neighbor constantly tells me. On certain occasions I will actually see her wearing similar outfits when I'm outside, but it's usually my other neighbor that tells me. Then it became more obvious. I bought a ton of maxi dresses for the summer and then one day she started wearing nothing but maxi dresses everyday. At one point she wore the same dress for 3 days straight, I believe she wanted to keep her streak but didn't have enough dresses to wear in one week. Now she's buying exact pieces that I wear... from bell bottoms, leather jackets, bangles, duster coats, knee high boots, chokers... I mean these are all things that girls wear, but this girl literally lived in gym clothes and now made a 180. I mean we could be twins now, but that wasn't the case when she first moved in.

One night my friends and I went to a bar and we met a group of guys. After an hour of talking one of the guys realized that I live next to "Ashley" he said "Yeah, I thought you looked familiar. You live next to Ashley. I know her and her boyfriend! Do you talk to her? She told me about you once, that you copy the way she dresses and want to look like her" at that point I was furious. I've resorted to wearing things that I normally wouldn't wear just so I won't match with her.

Everyday before I get made up, I tell myself "Nope, can't wear that because she wears that now..." Now I'm sitting here wondering "Should I really change my style just so I can prove to people that I'm not copying her, when she's the one that's mirroring me?" At this point I don't know what to do. It's really messing with my head.

tl;dr: I believe my neighbor is mirroring me and it's driving me nuts. I could just be overreacting, but either way she's telling people that I'm the one doing it.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:28

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

Danaru posted:

Neighbor [28 F] copies how I dress [26 F] and now she's telling people that I'm the one who copies her

wake her up with a bj

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:30

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Danaru posted:

Neighbor [28 F] copies how I dress [26 F] and now she's telling people that I'm the one who copies her

Power-ignore the situation. Anything else is giving the neighbor the attention and drama she craves. Next!

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:38

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

Motherfucker posted:

yeah actually. I've never ever had a problem with it even as a little kid. To be fair where I grew up was a shithole as well and moving away was really really good for me and my family so??

some people are powerfully inclined to get attached to murder hole neighborhoods just like they are to psychopath spouses, they're a bit mental and if they're exposing their children to the crappy situation they're addicted to they're real pieces of poo poo too

# ? Jul 5, 2017 01:42

Lonely Virgil: Oct 9, 2012

Danaru posted:

Neighbor [28 F] copies how I dress [26 F] and now she's telling people that I'm the one who copies her

OP's body is going to found stuffed in her closet full of hideous clothing.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 02:11

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

I (32F) love drinking IPA beer. My husband (32M) of 3 years says that it makes my skin smell and won't be intimate with me when I drink. I think he's just making excuses and doesn't find me attractive and won't be honest.

quote:

So right now I'm in a super stressful phase of my job, my one relief in the world is enjoying my beer. I love IPAs and drink anywhere between 1 and 4 every evening (5 or 6 on super stressful days) when I get home to unwind.

My husband says that I'm drinking enough to where I smell like alcohol and he also says and quote "when you drink IPA your skin smells like the mop bucket at a cheap brewery." Nice right? Anyways he refuses to be intimate let alone touch me because of this supposed odor.

Well it just so happens that this current opinion of his just so happens when I've discovered him checking out college age girls on Instagram. So to me, he's just comparing me who can't possibly look as good as 19 year old college girls and is getting his rocks off on Instagram.

How do I resolve this issue with him?

tl;dr: My husband says I smell when I drink IPA beer, I think he has other motivations.

General consensus is slamming up to six pints of IPA a night is likely responsible for her smelling like IPA all the time, and maybe dial it back a bit or take a loving shower.

Instead of heeding that advice:

From a throwaway obviously...my husband says that my skin smells bad when I drink IPA. Is this even possible? (self.beer)

quote:

I love IPA, because of work stress I drink 1-4 a night but occasionally a bit more.

His quote was "when you drink IPA your skin smells like the mop bucket at a cheap brewery."

Is there anything to this or is he just being an rear end?

Once again she's told that yes it's obviously the loving IPAs.

Undaunted, in the No Stupid Questions Tuesday - ask anything about beer thread she asks:

quote:

Does IPA make a persons skin smell bad? My husband says mine does when I drink IPA.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 02:39

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

Lol alcoholic

# ? Jul 5, 2017 02:45

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

That's upwards of a 12 pack of regular beer a night, LOL.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 02:48

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

new phone who dis posted:

That's upwards of a 12 pack of regular beer a night, LOL.

SHE HAS WORK STRESS OK?!>!!>!>!>!>!>

# ? Jul 5, 2017 02:56

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

It's nearly impossible to consume beer or alcohol in that quantity nightly without also getting fatter and more shot-out looking.

Source: personal experience

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:02

But Rocks Hurt Head: Jun 30, 2003; by Hand Knit; Pillbug

Husband: Honey I don't think you should be drinking so much be-

Wife: HOP STOOPID

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:04

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

OP: Help, reddit, my husband insists my candle habit makes my skin smell!
reddit: spend less on candles.
OP: no

I like the minimization & vagueness of how much she's really drinking. How much you wanna bet she has more 4 IPA nights than 1 IPA nights?

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:06

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

If your range is 1-6 it is never one or two and rarely 3

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:08

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

she should, like switch to weed?

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:14

new phone who dis: May 24, 2007; by VideoGames; Morbid Hound

Haifisch posted:

OP: Help, reddit, my husband insists my candle habit makes my skin smell!
reddit: spend less on candles.
OP: no

I like the minimization & vagueness of how much she's really drinking. How much you wanna bet she has more 4 IPA nights than 1 IPA nights?

Anyone in their life who has ever known a drunk knows exactly what she's saying when she describes it that way.

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:15

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

new phone who dis posted:

Anyone in their life who has ever known a drunk knows exactly what she's saying when she describes it that way.

My[22m] roommate[21m] is really jealous that I am able to date women, and he isn't. All he does is complain about being friendzoned.

quote:

I have been taking summer classes and my roommate Jeff has been a huge headache to deal with. We have been roommates since May and we started off as perfectly fine. I was a little annoyed with him that he wasn't as clean but after I talked to him it got better.

The whole program came when it was about women. My roommate is looking for a girlfriend. He has a lot of female friends but from what I have seen they aren't into him. I usually meet women off Tinder and through classes and my roommate was giving me a lot of crap for getting with women off Tinder.

He was telling me the women that I am going with are "damaged" and t hey fall for "guys like me" because I trick them. I told him that he is being crazy, that probably all of his female friends have used Tinder. And he goes onto tell me that I am pathetic and I just lead on women and trick them. That when women wise up they will be interested in guys like him.

He has since gotten even worse. He invited his female friends back to our apartment after going out to a bar near here. Me and one of his friends started talking at the end of the night, because she was sleeping on a blanket. We didn't have sex we just messed around and it just made him furious. He got angry that his friends found me attractive.

He has a way on how he wants to get women and I think he is just frustrated. He has a decent personality, it is just that he is not that attractive and it really gets him frustrated I think so he says women that aren't into him are damaged. I don't really know what to do on my end, we have a one year off campus lease and the spot we have is really good for the price we are paying. I want to get things better with this guy, I feel like just for networking it would be good if we were friends and all, but I don't know how to.

I havent really dealt with guys like this before so I don't know what to do. I am looking for some advice on how to handle this situation and so we are bros and aren't fighting

quote:

I didn't try to honestly I asked his friend like hey, I have an AC in my room you can sleep there instead of out in the living room. We get into my room and she starts hitting on me really hard.
Its odd his life is really good in a lot of ways, like he has close to a perfect GPA in one of the hardest majors in our school. He has had girlfriends before it is just the way that our school is that if you aren't in a fraternity you must be REALLY attractive to women for them to want to date you.

"my friend" is a great dude he's just righteously upset about being an 8/10 in Chad and Stacey's world, wait stop why are you calling him a creep

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:38

Blue Train: Jun 17, 2012

I've never seen a good story about someone named Jeff

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:40

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# ? May 27, 2024 09:12

Larry Parrish: Jul 9, 2012; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Motherfucker posted:

yeah actually. I've never ever had a problem with it even as a little kid. To be fair where I grew up was a shithole as well and moving away was really really good for me and my family so??

hey its a legit concern.

Its not 'a black thing' to have emotional attachment you dipshit

# ? Jul 5, 2017 03:41

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