Anonymous Confessions: I had an extremely weird dream that's going to become relevant

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armchairyoda: Sep 17, 2008; Melman

Aesop Poprock posted:

Lol if they don't have one of you scrub rear end nerd boy

don't sign your posts. mine was a selfie. :fella:

# ? Jul 22, 2017 15:00

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# ? May 20, 2024 20:39

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

quote:

I will be getting married soon. I had a dream last night about a woman I used to crush hard on, and it was the best sex dream I've ever had. I crushed on this girl back before my life fell apart and the woman I'm currently engaged to is amazing. My real confession is, if I could get away with it, I'd smash the poo poo out of my old crush in a heartbeat. Too bad she's crazy and she'd wreck my life if I suggest it (which would be the sane response, I guess?)
I love my fiancee she's just a bit physically frigid, is all. Still gonna be a boring husband who never does anything to hurt her because I really care about her.

I'm only a little scummy I guess.

P sure this is just cold feet bro, don't read too much into it

quote:

What's it like to have a sibling? (or a close cousin, I guess) I'm an only child so I dunno. What's it like to grow up in the same house with someone that's not you, but close enough to you. Is it annoyance growing up and then actual love down the line? What happens when you go your different ways? I feel like I missed out on something not having a sibling. I think it was never quite learning how to share. I wonder what had to happen to dudes for them to get the hots for their sister during puberty. Elliot Rodger. gently caress, I have this one cousin who is super-attractive, but I barely/never talk to that branch of the family. I know this is ramble-y, but it kinda just popped into the hosed-up crevice of my mind. beep boop how do feelings work?

gently caress the police and all, but I would probably kill a dude for their union benefits

Police unions are the only union still existence that's not under constant attack

Anyway yeah I wasn't super close to my sister growing up, but when you're young you're all in each other's face all the time and as you get older it's basically like if any of your relatives lived in the same house as you. I dunno I have trouble verbalizing complex emotional stuff under the best of circumstances and explaining the concept of "family" in words is not really the kind of thing I can manage before my caffeine kicks in

Regarding incest, I'm pretty sure like 90% of incest fetishists never had siblings growing up and have no context for how hosed-up the idea feels to anyone who did, and the other 10% are just gross people in general

# ? Jul 22, 2017 15:03

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

Sibling goon: Growing up my little sister and I hated each other. My parents divorced when we were both quite young and they ended up living in different states. You'd think we would he close since we only had each other to talk to and play with for a few months but nope. We would always be looking for a way to get the other in trouble. She had some problems and ended up moving out before high school was finished. I thought good riddance and was glad she was out of my life.

Now we are fairly close. I love her and would do anything for her. We confide in each other and actually have a relationship now. As it turns out as long as we don't live with each other things are good. That's just how it works in our family.

For us I guess being brother and sister is like being friends with someone you couldn't stand in high school. Even then we are not that close but we really do care about each other. Sorry if this was a bit meandering but like loq said, it's complicated and hard to put into words.

Edit: Guess I could segway to divorce goon: Divorce your wife. Seriously, no one is going to blame you for kicking her to the curb. I also totally get making her life a living hell. You shouldn't go down that road but I get it.

Under no circumstances should you use your children to make her life hell. If you use your children as pawns to hurt your ex-wife they WILL figure it out and resent you for it. After my mom divorced my dad he did just that and I haven't talked to him in years , nor do I see the need to. My sister still talks to him but is on the verge of giving up on him. Is getting revenge on your ex-wife worth losing any relationship you could have with your children?

limp_cheese fucked around with this message at 17:15 on Jul 22, 2017

# ? Jul 22, 2017 17:01

Crab Dad: Dec 28, 2002; behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB

Aesop Poprock posted:

I don't think I've ever been to a dive bar where the pissed off bartenders don't relish kicking people's asses to the curb for any reason whatsoever

You need to go to better lovely dive bars. Even the poo poo bars near Stanford wouldn't give a gently caress as long as you weren't making a table top show of it. That's what booths are for.

As a bartender i would have noticed and perhaps brought them a hot towel and ask them if they wanted to reserve the private room next time. But my place wasn't a dive bar and we did have three private rooms and that's where classy rich people did gently caress on the side.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 17:17

curufinor: Apr 4, 2016; by Smythe

LingcodKilla posted:

You need to go to better lovely dive bars. Even the poo poo bars near Stanford wouldn't give a gently caress as long as you weren't making a table top show of it. That's what booths are for.

As a bartender i would have noticed and perhaps brought them a hot towel and ask them if they wanted to reserve the private room next time. But my place wasn't a dive bar and we did have three private rooms and that's where classy rich people did gently caress on the side.

Never seen a Palo Alto bar that wasn't crowded to the loving gills, so i think that may just be a symptom of that

# ? Jul 22, 2017 17:27

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Relative goon: I've got a bunch of cousins and a sister. My family is Spanish and Italian, so on both sides family is super important and we're all super close. I know all my second cousins and some of my third cousins and they're all over at every family function just like first cousins.

For the cousins it's hit or miss, but mostly we all get along and have a really good time when we're together, especially the first cousins. None of us are best friends or anything, but when we're together it's all one big group and no one is out of place or ostracized.

For my sister we've always been close. We get under each other's skin if we're ever forced to stay together for extended periods of time, but that's just because we're polar opposites on almost everything. I'm the big brother and I've always been willing (and happy) to protect her when I've needed to. Not just physically, but mentally as well. I remember one time we were at this Fall Festival in either Illinois or Iowa and they were advertising they had the "scariest haunted house in the Midwest" or whatever. I was about 12 and she was maybe 9 or 10 and I convinced my parents to let us walk through it on our own. We got into the front door and it immediately slams and locks behind you (neat!). I think we got maybe two feet down the hallway before a door flew open, a guy in a mask I can't quite describe lunged out screaming, sort of grabbed/shook her shoulder, and then jumped back in behind the door.

She exploded into tears and I couldn't get her to stop crying. We had only just walked in, there was no way I could force my sister to go through the rest just to get out, and she was clinging to me terrified. I broke the entrance door (it wasn't well made obviously) to get her out. Security came and made us wait for our parents and then bitched up a storm to them about me breaking the door. I don't think they ever paid or anything for it, but I know I didn't get in any trouble.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 19:13

Theophany: Jul 22, 2014; SUCCHIAMI IL MIO CAZZO DA DIETRO, RANA RAGAZZO

2022 FIA Formula 1 WDC

If I had to describe my brothers the simplest way would be 'like best friends, but less effort.'

# ? Jul 22, 2017 19:43

kalel: Jun 19, 2012

the oldest of my four brothers is an rear end and the family as a whole stays away from him, even though we ostensibly "care" about him. but the rest of us get along well

# ? Jul 22, 2017 21:59

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

curufinor posted:

Never seen a Palo Alto bar that wasn't crowded to the loving gills, so i think that may just be a symptom of that

I know of at least one where they'd pelt you w peanuts

# ? Jul 23, 2017 04:46

Crab Dad: Dec 28, 2002; behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB

maskenfreiheit posted:

I know of at least one where they'd pelt you w peanuts

Oh the Nuthouse.

I really loved that place back in the early 2000s.

Of what I can remember... Kinda hazy actually.

Kelly was loving cool.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 05:23

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

LingcodKilla posted:

Oh the Nuthouse.

I really loved that place back in the early 2000s.

Of what I can remember... Kinda hazy actually.

Kelly was loving cool.

Are there even any other dive bars in PA?

Merv's was solidly in MV as were any other decent ones in South Bay I recall.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 05:42

Motherfucker: Jul 16, 2011; I certainly dont have deep-seated issues involving birthdays.

Family are just people my dude. I have a sister who I'm super close to and a brother who I literally can't stand and won't willingly go to places they are at. It is going to vary from experience to experience but I wouldn't really hang too much of your developmental poo poo on having / not having them around.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 07:26

Crab Dad: Dec 28, 2002; behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB

maskenfreiheit posted:

Are there even any other dive bars in PA?

Merv's was solidly in MV as were any other decent ones in South Bay I recall.

Rose and Crown was borderline but the worse of the worst was the Islander on El Camino near Gunn. Place was a shithole before one of the owners from the Old Pro bought it. He didn't improve it much.
The Edge was fairly lovely too but that was more of a late 90s spot and technically was dance club.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 07:53

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

quote:

My social circle consists mainly of punks and other alternative types. My weekend routine is pretty much to go out in my doc martens and punk jacket, get hosed up on cheap whisky and throw my weight around in the pit at a local punk show. I've been doing this for years and I love it.

Everyone I know struggles for money. Many of them are poorly educated and/or unemployed. I often hear my friends talking about how people who have jobs and money are "parasites" or "everything wrong with the world". They constantly spout Marxist views and buzzwords as if they're going to rise up in glorious revolution tomorrow and seize the means of production. Some of them really believe that some flavor of anarchy is what we need, or maybe fully automated luxury gay space communism; the common theme is "capitalism and rich people = bad, us (the proles) = good".

I have a job earning more than my country's average salary. I have a mortgage. I have more money in savings than most of my friends will see in a couple of years. I have been bootstrapping my way up the corporate ladder for the last 5 or 6 years and there are no signs that I'm slowing. It turns out that the kind of confrontational attitude you develop growing up as a punk is a real advantage in certain corporate environments!

I love capitalism. I believe that the best of us should rise to the top and be rewarded and people who talk about the bourgeoisie are just jealous and bitter that they lack the drive to succeed.

I never talk about my job with my buddies. They're all good guys and I couldn't ask for better friends but they would explode if they knew. I make sure I've always got smokes for people to bum or extra liquor and I'm always happy to pay to get people into shows. Funnily enough they're always happy to take my charity but never offer anything in return.

So yeah, basically my fesh is that I'm a class traitor who will be the first against the wall when the revolution comes.

Your friends are lovely but your politics are still bad

quote:

My ex and I separated back in 2012. I was in a bad place mentally; on drugs, lost my mother to drugs, and wasn't sure where my life was going. I had been seeing her for about 3 months and this was a lot of poo poo for her to deal with, so we split up.

But I've been keeping an eye on her since, despite how weird that sounds to an outsider. I've made fake online Facebook profiles and texted her through those, just to make sure she's not into drugs or anything. Once a week (roughly) I drive past her apartment to make sure the lights are on and there's no funny business going on.

I'm really proud of her, she's stayed motivated even without me in her life. I'm working hard now to improve myself and prove I can be a good boyfriend to her again.

it's been five years

you had been dating three months

I'm sure I don't need to tell you there is in fact more than one woman in the world

# ? Jul 23, 2017 16:33

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Hello fellow working class, my name is John Working Class and I'm extremely real. Has anyone else ever thought that capitalism is good and people are only poor because they're lazy parasites and don't fully capitulate to us the bourgeoise?

PS I'm a real person

# ? Jul 23, 2017 17:14

curufinor: Apr 4, 2016; by Smythe

Lol at thinking you're the bourgeoisie if you work for someone else

# ? Jul 23, 2017 17:16

Tiberius Christ: Mar 4, 2009

marxists call them petite bourgeoisie, all the delusion but none of the power that the real bourgeoisie have

# ? Jul 23, 2017 17:27

Theophany: Jul 22, 2014; SUCCHIAMI IL MIO CAZZO DA DIETRO, RANA RAGAZZO

2022 FIA Formula 1 WDC

creepgoon posted:

My ex and I separated back in 2012. I was in a bad place mentally; on drugs, lost my mother to drugs, and wasn't sure where my life was going. I had been seeing her for about 3 months and this was a lot of poo poo for her to deal with, so we split up.

But I've been keeping an eye on her since, despite how weird that sounds to an outsider. I've made fake online Facebook profiles and texted her through those, just to make sure she's not into drugs or anything. Once a week (roughly) I drive past her apartment to make sure the lights are on and there's no funny business going on.

I'm really proud of her, she's stayed motivated even without me in her life. I'm working hard now to improve myself and prove I can be a good boyfriend to her again.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 17:28

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

Stalker goon: You are a stalker. Seriously. She probably doesn't remember you and you are doing something absurdly creepy/illegal, because you are stalking her. Maybe the drugs hosed you up enough you can't tell the difference but you needed to stop doing this yesterday. Stop stalking a girl that you had a fling with, you stalker, before it ends with you kidnapping her.

Stalker.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 19:06

HerStuddMuffin: Aug 10, 2014; YOSPOS

Get out of here, stalker.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 19:21

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

Unequivocally everything stalker-ish is bad.

If you can't text or call a person but you're around their house sometimes, "just looking around" or trying to use mutual friends to see what they're up to--bad news all around, get therapy for realsies.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 19:26

Sorryformybadjokes: Apr 21, 2004; I identify as a simian who pronounces the 'silent' letters in words.; Fallen Rib

loquacius posted:

I believe that the best of us should rise to the top and be rewarded

Lol that this is now considered a controversial opinion.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 19:31

Gynovore: Jun 17, 2009; Forget your RoboCoX or your StickyCoX or your EvilCoX, MY CoX has Blinking Bewbs!

WHY IS THIS GAME DEAD?!

Winston Smith posted:

They constantly spout Marxist views and buzzwords

Uhhhh no. The politics of the working class today can be summed up as "Durrr Trump good!" and "Durrr Trump bad!" And nobody uses the word 'proles' anymore.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 19:33

maskenfreiheit: Dec 30, 2004

syscall girl posted:

Unequivocally everything stalker-ish is bad.

If you can't text or call a person but you're around their house sometimes, "just looking around" or trying to use mutual friends to see what they're up to--bad news all around, get therapy for realsies.

just f5 here facebook, instagram, twitter, pinterest and linkedin like a normal person SHEESH

# ? Jul 23, 2017 19:36

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

maskenfreiheit posted:

just f5 here facebook, instagram, twitter, pinterest and linkedin like a normal person SHEESH

If your previous relationship (assuming it went badly) means you are making alternate accounts on FB, twit, or any other social media you have a problem.

I'm at about 95% with previous SO's on FB and it's nice to hear about their families, work and kids. That's the nice happy stuff people post and occasionally they have troubles they want to share too.

And I don't want to hear about the other 5% it's more likely they stalking me.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 20:12

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

Jeff Sichoe posted:

Lol that this is now considered a controversial opinion.

It should be considering how many useless turd people come into positions of power

# ? Jul 23, 2017 20:23

Panfilo: Aug 27, 2011; EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬

I think as much as they claim otherwise, the average goon would end up being just as insufferable as Notch had they access to the same amount of wealth.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 22:18

Improbable Lobster: Jan 6, 2012; "From each according to his ability" said Ares. It sounded like a quotation.; Buglord

Aesop Poprock posted:

It should be considering how many useless turd people come into positions of power

People want that to happen but it never does.

# ? Jul 23, 2017 23:00

Nissin Cup Nudist: Sep 3, 2011; Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land

Panfilo posted:

I think as much as they claim otherwise, the average goon would end up being just as insufferable as Notch had they access to the same amount of wealth.

If I had Notch money, you wouldnt see me below my pile of hookers and blow

# ? Jul 24, 2017 01:46

omnibobb: Dec 3, 2005; Title text'd

Hopper posted:

Yeah seriously. I'd do it for my work friends, too.

Also confessor. You write your daughter is a star and your boys are the light of your life. If that is true, making sure your soon to be ex will never see them again, as you plan, may be the worst thing you can do.
I guarantee your kids will suffer from this way more than you two adults.

Remember: if you deny the mother contact with her kids, you also deny your kids contact with their mom...

Back a couple of pages, but totally this

My ex-wife is a broke rear end piece of poo poo, but I'd never dream of keeping our kids from her. No matter what other issues she is their mother and they totes love her.

# ? Jul 24, 2017 05:07

Streak: May 16, 2004; by Nyc_Tattoo

Panfilo posted:

I think as much as they claim otherwise, the average goon would end up being just as insufferable as Notch had they access to the same amount of wealth.

Hell I'm just as insufferable now (for different reasons) and I'm broke as poo poo!

# ? Jul 24, 2017 05:15

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

Streak posted:

Hell I'm just as insufferable now (for different reasons) and I'm broke as poo poo!

You wanna make some money kid *obviously throwing huge balls around in mesh shorts. Like just gigantic testicles*

# ? Jul 24, 2017 05:57

Streak: May 16, 2004; by Nyc_Tattoo

i'm listening (and starting to kneel down on the ground)

# ? Jul 24, 2017 05:58

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

Streak posted:

i'm listening (and starting to kneel down on the ground)

Look I'll be honest: what will you do for 14 coins I found in a bag from a defunct 90s arcade and I think they're aluminum. They are ok maybe they're aluminum

# ? Jul 24, 2017 06:03

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

I don't know what type of metal it is. Will you at least touch one of my testicles

# ? Jul 24, 2017 06:04

Johnny-on-the-Spot: Apr 17, 2015; That feeling when he opens
the door for you

# ? Jul 24, 2017 08:17

Autism Sneaks: Nov 21, 2016

Panfilo posted:

I think as much as they claim otherwise, the average goon would end up being just as insufferable as Notch had they access to the same amount of wealth.

I only pray it lands in the wealth of somebody incredibly petty and megalomaniacal like d.smart and blow it all on custom avs, smilies and parachute accounts

from this page: arch-capitalist goon is a deluded prole who thinks the invisible hand of the free market is a real meritocratic God, and that makes them somehow worse than stalker goon, who as far as we know doesn't do panty raids or leave voicemails that are just heavy breathing (but we can easily imagine because jesus)

# ? Jul 24, 2017 09:44

CheesyDog: Jul 4, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

There's a fine line between a middle-aged guy with a backstage pass
And a guy with a gut hanging around like a jackass
Everybody there was twenty years younger than me
At least that this is not my fondest memory

# ? Jul 24, 2017 12:23

Leave: Feb 7, 2012; Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.

I can't even imagine what it would be like to have Notch levels of money. I honestly don't know what I'd do with it, but I know I would have some goofy elaborate poo poo that I would never need.

Like a drinking fountain that dispenses Hawaiian Punch.

# ? Jul 24, 2017 13:24

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# ? May 20, 2024 20:39

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

The only way I would be different from Notch if I had Notch money is that I don't use Twitter

If I tried being a traditional rich person I'd just end up being like Zuck anyway and given the choice I'd 100% take Notch

quote:

I used to work in the facility popularly known as Area 51 as a civilian contractor for several years. Operations there are highly compartmentalized and I'm not even sure what exactly the whole project was that they assigned me to. That said, I did have a pretty senior position and knew more than most of the people I worked with.

My confession is that I fully believed the alien stuff about the place before I worked there. I snooped around as much as I could without raising attention, and despite seeing most parts of the facility there were no alien bodies, no alien spacecraft. Just man-made stuff, although some very cool man made stuff. This kind of killed my passion for work and I eventually quit. Not being able to talk about your job and feeling like you're always being watched even at home, having to wonder if every random person you meet is a foreign intelligence operative, etc is a very lonely and sad existence. I'm only writing this now because I am sure they won't be able to identify me, and I haven't really shared anything classified anyway.

A secondary confession relevant to the thread title is that since leaving, I've had to see a therapist regularly. I still feel like they are always watching me years after I left. Every time I catch someone staring at me or I see cars with tinted windows driving by my house, I start to have panic attacks. Whenever I hear something outside at night my first thought is always that they are coming to make me disappear. The therapist says I have paranoid delusions and some of what she has said has helped, but deep down part of me thinks they aren't all delusions. I don't know why they would do this to me because I haven't and will never share the details of what I saw or worked on, but that fear has never gone away.

I wasn't like this at all before working there, and I've thought several times about suing them for mental/emotional damages, but I feel like even talking to a lawyer about it will turn my fears of being "disappeared" into reality.

^^^ totally thought this would be an alien fesh at first

Anyway I'm no expert in the legal field but suing Area 51 for emotional damages seems like a bad idea in general yeah

quote:

I'm a fairly average looking guy, but I'm well-spoken, good at (or rather, good at pretending to) listening, a tiny bit of a sociopath. I go bar-hopping a few times a week to try to pick up women. My batting average isn't insane - if luck is on my side and I really put in the effort maybe 3 times a week, other times it can be a fortnight without any takers. Having a corporate credit card that we all treat like a personal slush fund helps too.

I've been doing this since I graduated college and moved to a big city.

Anyway, my confession is that in all the years I've been doing this I always come inside whoever I gently caress if I'm going bareback. I sometimes think about how it's weird hardly any of these women have asked me to use protection. Some of them get really loving pissed when they realise I've finished inside them, a couple of times they've screamed at me or even hit me and stormed out. I'm not sure why I feel compelled to do it, but at this point gently caress knows how many kids I could've fathered. I legit have no loving idea how I would handle running into somebody I knocked up and kept the kid and it's been bothering me lately that it might happen one day. Maybe its time to move cities.

As I understand it, if you as a demonstrably well-off person had any illegitimate kids, you'd know about it by now

# ? Jul 24, 2017 14:55

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Anonymous Confessions: I had an extremely weird dream that's going to become relevant

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