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Rotten Cookies posted:Gord Murphy Does Not Pass. It's those useless Leafs forwards who just can't score, he's forced to take matters into his own hands.
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Jul 24, 2017 19:41
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End of 2028-29 Season Update NHL Awards Stanley Cup Champions San Jose Sharks Presidents Trophy (Best Regular Season Record) Boston Bruins Art Ross Trophy (Most Points) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Hart Memorial Trophy (League MVP) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins James Norris Memorial Trophy (Best Defenseman) Bavel Bortnik -- San Jose Sharks Lady Byng Memorial Trophy (Best Sportsmanship & Gentlemanly Conduct) Coach Hockles -- Columbus Blue Jackets Calder Memorial Trophy (Rookie of the Year) J. Ciarelli -- Dallas Stars Conn Smythe Trophy (Playoff MVP) Touchdown Thomas -- New York Islanders Vezina Trophy (Best Goaltender) I. Scott -- Colorado Avalanche William M. Jennings Trophy (Goalie(s) on team with fewest Goals Against) M. Helminen/Malcom Subban -- Boston Bruins Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy (Perserverence, Sportsmanship & Dedication to hockey) D. Samorukov -- Detroit Red Wings Frank J. Selke Trophy (Best Defensive Forward) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Ted Lindsay Award (League MVP as voted by NHLPA) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Maurice "Rocket" Richard Trophy (Most Goals) Jus Poost -- Boston Bruins Upcoming Free Agents DAL -- Stabby McStabson MTL -- Stanley Matthews III NYR -- Kaido Hoovelson PHI -- Bubba Biscuits VAN -- Jack Bauer WSH -- Aldrig Glomma Ogie Ogilthorpe III Jeremiah ThinkTank Guy Fieri Taro Tsujimoto Scott Johns Miracle Johnson Danny Provolone Comments Bortnik leads his team to back-to-back cups Thomas wins the Conn Smythe as a losing player since he tied the all-time record for goals in a single playoff http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats Hockles fucked around with this message at 04:09 on Jul 29, 2017 |
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Jul 27, 2017 02:34
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Bow down to Bavel
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Jul 27, 2017 02:38
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Time to khl up in this bitch, deuces
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Jul 27, 2017 02:41
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i just lost a game 7 to a guy named bavel loving bortnik
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Jul 27, 2017 12:40
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The Canucks not only made it to the playoffs, they won a playoff series.  Agent Jack Bauer needs to sign with an American team that's making the playoffs every year. 
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Jul 27, 2017 13:35
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which morons are gonna give me the girardi contract
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Jul 27, 2017 22:42
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Caps fend off the powerhouse Bruins only to drop to Ottawa in round 2. 
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Jul 28, 2017 00:15
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Turdsdown Tom posted:i just lost a game 7 to a guy named bavel loving bortnik that's two time, two time, two time.... stanley cup champion, bavel bortnik to you, jerk
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Jul 28, 2017 00:31
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Aye Doc posted:that's two time, two time, two time.... stanley cup champion, bavel bortnik to you, jerk 3 time.
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Jul 28, 2017 00:40
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Hockles posted:3 time. this is where i find out the sharks won the cup in 25-26
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Jul 28, 2017 00:42
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Aye Doc posted:that's two time, two time, two time.... stanley cup champion, bavel bortnik to you, jerk gently caress you win a conn smythe and then talk to me this thread is so amazing lmao please keep doing these, the banter is just too good barnold fucked around with this message at 01:38 on Jul 28, 2017 |
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Jul 28, 2017 01:35
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Turdsdown Tom posted:gently caress you win a conn smythe and then talk to me Hockles posted:End of 2027-28 Season Update Go on...
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Jul 28, 2017 01:49
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i hope russia is nice this time of year
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Jul 28, 2017 01:57
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Hockles posted:Go on... god loving damnit
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Jul 28, 2017 02:03
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I hope Windros gets CTE in the offseason
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Jul 28, 2017 02:48
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2029 Offseason News Notable Retirements Nikita Kucherov Ryan Johansen Tomas Hertl Brandon Saad Boone Jenner Shayne Gotisbehere Teuvo Teravainen Frank Vatrano Nikita Zadorov John Gibson Full Lists: http://imgur.com/a/IO9Ld -- http://imgur.com/a/enIdf -- http://imgur.com/a/MZ1gG Transaction News MTL -- re-signed Stanley Matthews III to a $16.4mil/3yr contract NYR -- re-signed Kaido Hoovelson to a $17.6mil/3yr contract PHI -- re-signed Bubba Biscuits to a $9.2mil/3yr contract WSH -- re-signed Aldrig Glomma to a $11.6mil/2yr contract MTL -- signed Ogie Ogilthorpe III to a $3.4mil/2yr contract WSH -- signed Jack Bauer to a $15.3mil/3yr contract Unsigned Jeremiah ThinkTank Guy Fieri Stabby McStabson Taro Tsujimoto Scott Johns Miracle Johnson Danny Provolone 2029-30 Opening Night Info ARZ -- Southie Paux is a 2nd Line FWD BOS -- Quayden Aydin is a 1st Line FWD BOS -- Jus Poost is a 1st Line FWD CAR -- Nippon Ichi is a 3rd CHK Line FWD CAR -- Gord Gordon is a 2nd Line FWD COL -- Soup Athanatos is 1st Line FWD COL -- Aunt Jemima is a 1st Line FWD CBJ -- Coach Hockles is a 1st Line FWD DAL -- Anders Potetson is a 3rd CHK Line FWD DAL -- Potatoes O'Bourke is a Top 4 DEF FLA -- Bernie Sanders is a 2nd Line FWD LA -- Floaty McPylon is a Top 4 DEF MIN -- Aejix Dundee is an Elite Goalie MTL -- Ogie Ogilthorpe III is a 4th Line FWD MTL -- Stanley Matthews III is a 2nd Line FWD MTL -- Cruz McBroozer is a 2nd Line FWD NYI -- Touchdown Thomas is a 1st Line FWD NYR -- Ewic Windros is a 2nd Line FWD NYR -- Kaido Hoovelson is a Top 4 DEF PHI -- Bubba Biscuits is a 3rd CHK Line FWD PHI -- Hugh Jass is a Top 4 DEF SJ -- Bavel Bortnik is a Top 2 DEF TB -- Yokozuna is an Elite Goalie TOR -- Gord Murphy is a Top 2 DEF WSH -- Aldrig Glomma is a Depth FWD WSH -- Jack Bauer is a 3rd SCR Line FWD WSH -- Puck Sonette is a 3rd SCR Line FWD WPG -- Mulkku Paskiainen is an Elite Goalie Unsigned Jeremiah ThinkTank Guy Fieri Stabby McStabson Taro Tsujimoto Scott Johns Miracle Johnson Danny Provolone Comments Ogilthorpe III gets back into the NHL, but McStabson is now AWOL I bet that crew makes one hell of a Beer League team
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Jul 28, 2017 05:51
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thank you for the money, rangers. i will continue to do nothing to earn it
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Jul 28, 2017 15:17
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a false posted:thank you for the money, rangers. i will continue to do nothing to earn it Why are you quoting Dan Girardi?
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Jul 28, 2017 15:35
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Agent Jack Bauer is going to Washington! 
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Jul 28, 2017 22:58
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mentholmoose posted:Agent Jack Bauer is going to Washington! What up line mate. 
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Jul 28, 2017 23:24
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ThinkTank posted:Why are you quoting Dan Girardi? a false posted:which morons are gonna give me the girardi contract The game mocks real life all too well sometimes.
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Jul 29, 2017 04:55
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2030 All-Star Break Update All-Stars Pacific - Bavel Bortnik (7th selection) Pacific - Floaty McPylon (7th selection) Central - Soup Athantos (5th selection) Central - Aunt Jemima (9th selection) Central - Aejix Dundee (7th selection) Atlantic - Quayden Aydin (8th selection) Atlantic - Jus Poost (9th selection) Atlantic - Gord Murphy (7th selection) Metropolitan - Touchdown Thomas (9th selection) Metropolitan - Coach Hockles (4th selection) Transaction News None Notable Stats Aydin leads the NHL in Points, Poost is 3rd Thomas leads the NHL in Goals, Poost is 2nd, Jemima is 5th Top 4 in PIM: Jemima, Windros, O'Bourke, Biscuits Comments Not much variation between the top tier of goons anymore http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
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Jul 29, 2017 07:01
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Gord... Gord, just... just stop, Gord. Just let it go.
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Jul 29, 2017 07:58
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rangers aren't hopelessly out just yet??
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Jul 29, 2017 19:12
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Oh no Carolina
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Jul 29, 2017 20:18
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Glad I got that cup early so my HOF nomination won't have any problems 
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Jul 29, 2017 21:00
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Tampa is so unbelievably average
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Jul 29, 2017 21:13
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4th Bubba? Fourth? What the hell do you think you're doing? stop trying to score goals and do things on offense and get back to trying to hurt people.
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Jul 29, 2017 23:16
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tsujimoto has gone to play for a nice team upstate where he gets all the ice time he needs and people pass to him every play 
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Jul 29, 2017 23:26
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End of 2029-30 Regular Season Update Transaction News None Notable Stats Aydin lead the NHL in Points, Thomas was 2nd, Poost was 5th Thomas lead the NHL in Goals, Poost was 2nd, Athanatos was 3rd, Aydin was 5th Aydin finished 2nd in +/-, Poost was 4th Top 7 in PIM - O'Bourke, Jemima, Windros, Biscuits, Potetson, Glomma, Ogilthorpe III Comments Aydin is gonna walk away with all the Awards again Bortnik continues to pass, continues to win Norris trophies Dundee will win all the goalie trophies, and maybe the Hart/Lindsay Hoovelson played the best season of his career Yokozuna was hurt most of the season http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
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Jul 30, 2017 09:09
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oh, great. Now the Rangers are following the old Toronto philosophy of sucking, but only sucking enough to get 9th or 10th every year
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Jul 30, 2017 16:01
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THE MACHO MAN posted:oh, great. Now the Rangers are following the old Toronto philosophy of sucking, but only sucking enough to get 9th or 10th every year Toronto's in-fiction sucking now is to make the playoffs as a low seed every 2-3 years and immediately get swept.
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Jul 30, 2017 16:09
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Glad I got traded from a perennial loser to playoff choker But at least I'm making big bucks!
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Jul 30, 2017 17:14
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Top Hats Monthly posted:But at least I'm making big bucks!
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Jul 30, 2017 17:15
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Pleads posted:Toronto's in-fiction sucking now is to make the playoffs as a low seed every 2-3 years and immediately get swept. I would take that. Windros hasn't seen the playoffs in almost a loving decade. I can only assume the games missed in his best season yet were due to a self-inflicted concussion. Hockles, what the poo poo does the rest of the Rangers line up look like? Also how bad were they a few years ago that Hoovelson had a -51 
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Jul 30, 2017 17:18
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Yokozuna was out getting his stomach stapled, which they described to the press as a lower body strain
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Jul 30, 2017 17:29
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Jesus christ Vancouver and Anaheim
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Jul 30, 2017 19:04
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Well, I guess I don't need to stick around and see who wins the cup since those last set of comments pretty much gives it away. But hey, maybe a miracle is up ahead...
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Jul 30, 2017 22:13
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Agent Jack Bauer was the only thing holding the Canucks together, it would appear.
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Jul 30, 2017 22:24
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