OSHA: definitely bent in the straight places

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > OSHA: definitely bent in the straight places

J.A.B.C.: Jul 2, 2007; There's no need to rush to be an adult.

Wasabi the J posted:

That poo poo is so evil and hilarious.

I remember during my basic training, there was a drill sergeant loving with recruits at the top of the rappelling tower.

line 1 on rappel! *Stands on side of tower*
oh poo poo private, you tied your Swiss seat the left-handed way! Uh just hold that line real tight when you go down!
uhhhh
go go go hurry up there's a line you'll be fine just hold it right! No poo poo left!

During Rappel in Basic we were separated by Platoon. Our plt was up next, so we were standing there when the group before us was finishing up. There was one guy at the top who just stood there as the last of the group came down the wall, and you could hear the DIs shouting at him.

Then he buckled at the knees and dropped down the wall without a rope and we freaked the gently caress out. DI at the top looks over the edge, starts shouting at the guys down at the bottom to keep us back, pure chaos.

Turns out it was a dummy they set up to gently caress with the new troops, and we were the unlucky group that cycle.

To summarize: drill instructors are assholes.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 15:27

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# ? May 21, 2024 09:19

Phanatic: Mar 13, 2007; Please don't forget that I am an extremely racist idiot who also has terrible opinions about the Culture series.

GotLag posted:

That's not relevant to the incident. The gearbox is.

Isobutane was entirely relevant to the incident. It's what exploded when the expanding cloud of what is called vapor came in contact with a piece of a equipment called a welder.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 15:29

By popular demand: Jul 17, 2007; IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!

J.A.B.C. posted:

To summarize: drill instructors are assholes.

My only military knowledge is second hand stories and Full metal jacket, but isn't that the point?

# ? Jul 27, 2017 15:31

GotLag: Jul 17, 2005; 食べちゃダメだよ

Phanatic posted:

Isobutane was entirely relevant to the incident. It's what exploded when the expanding cloud of what is called vapor came in contact with a piece of a equipment called a welder.

Taking your post at its retarded face value, the chemical process the flammable gas was being used in/produced by was not relevant to the incident. What was relevant was the malfunctioning device called a "gearbox" which was attached to the valve, and the reason for its being removed by the workers.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 15:44

Wasabi the J: Jan 23, 2008; MOM WAS RIGHT

Horrible Lurkbeast posted:

My only military knowledge is second hand stories and Full metal jacket, but isn't that the point?

They're more like drunk abusive relatives, some are even fun some of the time, but all of them will gently caress your day up.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 16:52

spog: Aug 7, 2004; It's your own bloody fault.

GotLag posted:

Taking your post at its retarded face value, the chemical process the flammable gas was being used in/produced by was not relevant to the incident. What was relevant was the malfunctioning device called a "gearbox" which was attached to the valve, and the reason for its being removed by the workers.

Also relevant was the piece of equipment called a spanner.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 16:53

Phanatic: Mar 13, 2007; Please don't forget that I am an extremely racist idiot who also has terrible opinions about the Culture series.

Molten metal supersoaker.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UYe8mxqKOM

# ? Jul 27, 2017 17:27

GnarlyCharlie4u: Sep 23, 2007; I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof

GotLag posted:

Note the disposal company slogan, visible at 2:10
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rktMzw2fd28

How convenient that the supervisor stepped out at just the right moment...

# ? Jul 27, 2017 17:38

Thots and Prayers: Jul 13, 2006; A is the for the atrocious abominated acts that YOu committed. A is also for ass-i-nine, eight, seven, and six.

B, b, b - b is for your belligerent, bitchy, bottomless state of affairs, but why?

C is for the cantankerous condition of our character, you have no cut-out.; Grimey Drawer

Arms_Akimbo posted:

Why does anybody ever get on a carnival ride? Unless you want the last thing you ever hear to be a blown out speaker blasting Enter Sandman, why take the risk? Do you see who assembles and maintains those rides?

My stepmother was a social worker for a small county up in the upper midwest. Every year she'd have to handle a few reports of kids running off with the carnival when it came through town.

Often it was *days* before their family reported them missing.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 17:54

Yawgmoth: Sep 10, 2003; This post is cursed!

Zahgaegun posted:

My stepmother was a social worker for a small county up in the upper midwest. Every year she'd have to handle a few reports of kids running off with the carnival when it came through town.

Often it was *days* before their family reported them missing.

To be fair, in the upper midwest sometimes kids just take off for a couple days and go camping.

One of my friends was a carnie for a while up in alaska. Man does he have stories about the people, the rides, everything. there's even more meth and coke than you'd expect.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 18:19

Serephina: Nov 8, 2005; 恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー

Phanatic posted:

Molten metal supersoaker.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UYe8mxqKOM

This kid's parents have way too much loving money

# ? Jul 27, 2017 18:38

Slugworth: Feb 18, 2001; If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!

spog posted:

but they are happy to use the phrase 'sulphuric acid alkylation unit where isobutanes and olefins are converted'

One of the doctors I work with does this too. I've brought it up to him, he continues to do it.

"So, the issue is that the cranial cruciate ligament has ruptured, which causes the femoral condyles to grind against the tibial plateau, causing pain in what they call 'the knee'."

# ? Jul 27, 2017 18:42

Applesnots: Oct 22, 2010; MERRY YOBMAS

Phanatic posted:

Molten metal supersoaker.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UYe8mxqKOM

Welp, I know what I am building this weekend.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 18:46

Ape Has Killed Ape: Sep 15, 2005

Phanatic posted:

Molten metal supersoaker.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UYe8mxqKOM

I'm gonna read about this dude in the news one day, and I expect the words "beyond recognition" to be involved.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 19:14

Pander: Oct 9, 2007; Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.

Ape Has Killed Ape posted:

I'm gonna read about this dude in the news one day, and I expect the words "beyond recognition" to be involved.

"Dental records indicate..."

# ? Jul 27, 2017 19:36

DiHK: Feb 4, 2013; by Azathoth

What's that line... "Injuries incompatible with life"?

# ? Jul 27, 2017 19:37

shame on an IGA: Apr 8, 2005

I'm not a real big fan of our new tugger robot, tell me why when you see it.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 19:54

Beer_Suitcase: May 3, 2005; Verily, the whip is ghost riding.

shame on an IGA posted:

I'm not a real big fan of our new tugger robot, tell me why when you see it.

Is it the cut off switch being on the flailing robot death arm ?

# ? Jul 27, 2017 20:05

Nocheez: Sep 5, 2000; Can you spare a little cheddar?; Nap Ghost

Can the robot hit its own emergency switch by accident?

# ? Jul 27, 2017 20:32

Pander: Oct 9, 2007; Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.

Beer_Suitcase posted:

Is it the cut off switch being on the flailing robot death arm ?

first thing I noticed. Reminds me of the runaway concrete buffer.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 21:01

Baronjutter: Dec 31, 2007; "Tiny Trains"

# ? Jul 27, 2017 21:04

shame on an IGA: Apr 8, 2005

Beer_Suitcase posted:

Is it the cut off switch being on the flailing robot death arm ?

unironically glad my office is upstairs

# ? Jul 27, 2017 21:11

spog: Aug 7, 2004; It's your own bloody fault.

shame on an IGA posted:

unironically glad my office is upstairs

Seems to have the same design flaw as the daleks.

# ? Jul 27, 2017 23:58

zedprime: Jun 9, 2007; yospos

The primary audience of CSB briefs (besides this thread) are Process Safety Management specialists and insurance underwriters and I can confirm that they really do need told that the thing what is on top of that valve and always breaking is technically called a gearbox.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 00:03

GotLag: Jul 17, 2005; 食べちゃダメだよ

shame on an IGA posted:

our new tugger robot

Is there anything that won't be automated?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 00:24

Memento: Aug 25, 2009; Bleak Gremlin

shame on an IGA posted:

our new tugger robot

Oh now you're saying tugging will protect me, right?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 00:27

By popular demand: Jul 17, 2007; IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!

I feel so old for getting that reference.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 00:44

ssb: Feb 16, 2006; WOULD YOU ACCOMPANY ME ON A BRISK WALK? I WOULD LIKE TO SPEAK WITH YOU!!

I don't think the source behind the stupid goon identification question really counts as obscure on these forums.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:02

Memento: Aug 25, 2009; Bleak Gremlin

shortspecialbus posted:

I don't think the source behind the stupid goon identification question really counts as obscure on these forums.

Maybe it's not obscure, but it is 17 years old.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:05

Say Nothing: Mar 5, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Wear a seatbelt.

(She survived).

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:10

Pander: Oct 9, 2007; Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.

Say Nothing posted:

Wear a seatbelt.

(She survived).

...

if you call that living.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:18

Bloody Hedgehog: Dec 12, 2003; 💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something

Shhhheeeetbeths shafed muh lyfffffee.

*mucuous drips from combination nostril/eye-socket*

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:26

Pharmaskittle: Dec 17, 2007; arf arf put the money in the fuckin bag

Say Nothing posted:

Wear a seatbelt.

(She survived).

Lol if she's alive why can we see her skull deprived of flesh you idiot fuckman

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:27

Say Nothing: Mar 5, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Pharmaskittle posted:

Lol if she's alive why can we see her skull deprived of flesh you idiot fuckman

Have you never wondered what that zipper on the back of your head is for?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:31

Spatial: Nov 15, 2007

her skull just plum gave out

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:32

neonbregna: Aug 20, 2007

Say Nothing posted:

Wear a seatbelt.

(She survived).

Kind of want this on a shirt.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 01:56

Three-Phase: Aug 5, 2006; by zen death robot

That's one hell of a... what do you call it? Compound fractures?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 02:00

PainterofCrap: Oct 17, 2002; hey bebe

Displaced fractures.

I can't figure out what all the white squiggly parts are. It's almost like the skull was previously wired together, and then...this.

There a link?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 02:02