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The Walrus posted:full of poo poo Apparently they would just buy a fuckton of whatever was on sale and nothing else, the biggest WTF part of it was that my uncle had no idea what they were doing with so much muffin mix and coke. He liked to think that they were just living on muffin mix and coke I tend to think they were actually reselling it. The story is true in that my now dead uncle told me about it and he wasn't the type to change stories to make himself look better. He loved telling stories about dumbass poo poo that he did, even if it made him sound like a fuckup. Other favorites from uncle mike are the time he jumped off a bridge and the time he robbed a dive shop. His stories were always confirmed by my mother and his other siblings in a resigned sort of way. The albertsons stories were confirmed by my aunt who once saved uncle mike when he got mouthy with a robber and the guy had him on his knees at gunpoint. She literally had to beg for his life.
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Jul 28, 2017 22:47
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Glenn Quebec posted:Oh yeah I was definitely suggesting that it's mutually exclusive. Should we explain it using a train analogy so you can understand it? I went from retail to academia to industry. There's now way in hell it would have happened had I not got every scholarship I applied for and had familial support. Top that off with retail's spotty hours and lovely pay. Not everyone gets those advantages and they end up stuck in retail.
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Jul 28, 2017 22:56
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Nah, I get it. It's literally impossible for everyone and the stars aligned for you and me.
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Jul 28, 2017 23:11
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just keep at it, one of these days every single human will be CEOs of fortune 500 companies
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Jul 28, 2017 23:14
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or hey, maybe those 4 million retail drones can join the military and provide real economic benefits for the world such as explosions and bloodshed
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Jul 28, 2017 23:15
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I think a dude started off by trying to give earnest, non-snarky advice. But hey, gently caress me for trying to assume best intentions lately.
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Jul 28, 2017 23:19
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Welp, we're at the point where any effort made to improve one's life is equivalent to Ayn Rand bootstrapping. Time to pack it in I guess.
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Jul 28, 2017 23:22
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yes actually gently caress you for putting in the bare minimum to be a good person and thinking you should get a fuckin parade for it
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Jul 28, 2017 23:24
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Festus The Fetus posted:Apparently they would just buy a fuckton of whatever was on sale and nothing else, the biggest WTF part of it was that my uncle had no idea what they were doing with so much muffin mix and coke. He liked to think that they were just living on muffin mix and coke I tend to think they were actually reselling it. Post the dive shop story in the sea patrol thread
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Jul 28, 2017 23:27
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Former DILF posted:yes actually gently caress you for putting in the bare minimum to be a good person and thinking you should get a fuckin parade for it 
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Jul 28, 2017 23:32
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Former DILF posted:yes actually gently caress you for putting in the bare minimum to be a good person and thinking you should get a fuckin parade for it
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Jul 28, 2017 23:35
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hey i was perfectly fine letting this be the retail thread but then it became about "helpful" goons impassioned pleas to take loans and ruin other job markets
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Jul 28, 2017 23:41
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maybe I am a plumber and I want all the retail workers discouraged so I can keep my $150 an hour plus bennies job
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Jul 28, 2017 23:42
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That would explain not being able to leave poo poo alone
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Jul 28, 2017 23:48
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Glenn Quebec posted:Nah, I get it. It's literally impossible for everyone and the stars aligned for you and me. Forget it Glenn, it's Chinatown
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Jul 28, 2017 23:54
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Inescapable Duck posted:You know what'll help? Going further into completely undischargeable debt on something that has absolutely no guarantee to actually help you in any way, despite everyone in your family and education insisting it is the only way to improve your lot in life. Yeah, the one silver lining to me being disabled now is that my student loans were discharged, but boy are there a LOT of other quality of life things my status is explicitly kept away from by the US Government. Also I had no idea the discharge thing even existed until i tried to use my status as a bargaining chip like a shitheel while working on a payment plan woth my lender. The online info about the program isn't even on the department of education's site, but stashed away in a military branch site. College costs are definitely a scam.
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Jul 29, 2017 00:04
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Computer repair shop. Guy comes in saying his floppy drives not working. I take the floppy drive apart and find a pokemon card lodged inside.  I removed the card and put it back together, all working, job done, another satisfied customer. But he wasn't satisfied, on no. He refused to pay, accused us of sticking the pokemon card in there and sabotaging his machine. Tried to calmly suggest that *maybe* his kids did it, but he sternly told us that his kids knew that they weren't allowed near his PC.  Boss finally got him to pay, but we never saw him again. We had another guy come in, bragging he was a consultant for the SAS and that someone was trying to hack into the BIOS of his computer. I flat out told the boss that I didn't want to work on the machine, since he obviously wasn't all there, but I wasn't listened to. I honestly can't remember what I did, think it was a load of virus/malware scans and everything come up clean, so we charge him for the basics and send him on his way. He comes back the next day going ape poo poo, saying his still being hacked and causes a scene in the front of the shop, so much so, that we call the police, but he does a runner before they turn up. He then comes in the next day to appologise because he forgot to take his medication.
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Jul 29, 2017 00:23
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Glenn Quebec posted:Nah, I get it. It's literally impossible for everyone and the stars aligned for you and me. https://goo.gl/images/m4UlMZ Ice meltdown Drunk Nerds fucked around with this message at 01:02 on Jul 29, 2017 |
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Jul 29, 2017 00:57
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Glenn Quebec posted:Nah, I get it. It's literally impossible for everyone and the stars aligned for you and me. No, you clearly don't get it so I'll try saying it a different way. Thing's have changed and asinine  ing at people is going to get you mocked.
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Jul 29, 2017 03:02
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This is the greatest thread because retail workers go straight berserk on the drop of anything that isn't "lol customers are dumb"
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Jul 29, 2017 03:43
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Glenn Quebec posted:This is the greatest thread because retail workers go straight berserk on the drop of anything that isn't "lol customers are dumb" Hi! Please respond to the posts that illustrate how going to college while working retail in 2017 is different than in 2005, or confess that you are a mentally challenged troll/sad average intelligence person. Something special happened in between 2005 and now. Something that relates to us all, but especially to those people seeking college education. If you fail to acknowledge this in your posts I will be forced to assume you are too mentally challenged to understand the linear passage of time. Hi!
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Jul 29, 2017 03:48
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Sure. I'm a retard, or press the "?" to see that I've enjoyed trolling this thread on and off. (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Jul 29, 2017 03:50
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Glenn Quebec posted:Sure. I'm a retard, or press the "?" to see that I've enjoyed trolling this thread on and off. Its the first one since you're a terrible troll.
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Jul 29, 2017 04:25
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I refuse to believe that Glenn Quebec isn't PCOS Bill's alt for when he's tired of shitposting in the recent purchases thread
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Jul 29, 2017 05:20
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I don't work in retail, but this half-ton blob of a woman hit me with her lovely Chevy van today after I told her no, you can't drive into this completely full parking lot, there are no parking spots for your huge stupid car. Then she poo poo her pants and dipped out real fast less than a minute after sitting down and ordering a round of drinks for her family because the manager came over mentioned that the cops might get called. It sort of owned, but almost getting obliterated by a van from 1982 did not. Basically I'm a parking lot attendant that says "no" to people all day long as they try to get into the restaurant I work for. It's a pretty sweet gig and the whole "dealing with customers" thing is basically the closest thing to retail without being retail.
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Jul 29, 2017 05:25
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treiz01 posted:I refuse to believe that Glenn Quebec isn't PCOS Bill's alt for when he's tired of shitposting in the recent purchases thread PCOS BIll is on a month long probation 
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Jul 29, 2017 05:58
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Turdsdown Tom posted:I don't work in retail, but this half-ton blob of a woman hit me with her lovely Chevy van today after I told her no, you can't drive into this completely full parking lot, there are no parking spots for your huge stupid car. Then she poo poo her pants and dipped out real fast less than a minute after sitting down and ordering a round of drinks for her family because the manager came over mentioned that the cops might get called. It sort of owned, but almost getting obliterated by a van from 1982 did not. Clearly the mistake was your manager telling her in advance that the cops were coming after she hit you. Though does that now count as a hit and run?
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Jul 29, 2017 06:07
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working in a buy/sell/trade record store brings out a special kind of customer. chuds trying to cash in on boxes full of cat piss grandma albums, idiots who think their Disney VHS tapes can sell for $5000, and people expecting you to know how much a Beatles vinyl is worth despite their only info being "it's old and i got it from my dad" basically happen daily. but my favourite question of all time is when a lady asked me if we keep our black and white artists seperate because she needs an Erykah Badu album right now, she didn't like it much when i laughed.
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Jul 29, 2017 06:48
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DogonCrook posted:That would explain not being able to leave poo poo alone gently caress man
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Jul 29, 2017 11:57
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Million Ghosts posted:but my favourite question of all time is when a lady asked me if we keep our black and white artists seperate because she needs an Erykah Badu album right now, she didn't like it much when i laughed. I used to sell stamps, and black people used to demand "ethnic" stamps, which have Rosa Parks or whoever on them instead of regular stamps. So at some point we only started carrying ethnic stamps since they sold well. But then if you'd hand them to a black customer without them asking for "ethnic" stamps, they'd say "ARE YOU JUST GIVING ME THESE BECAUSE I'M BLACK?" and get pissy. Then I'd explain that I literally only had ethnic stamps and nothing else, and they'd buy them. The water company doesn't give a gently caress about what your stamps look like, lady.
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Jul 29, 2017 14:29
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Choco1980 posted:Clearly the mistake was your manager telling her in advance that the cops were coming after she hit you. According to the police (of which there aren't too many officers in this town, and all of them I know), yes. I probably wasn't going to actually submit a police report or anything....but I might have had one of the cops I'm tight with go in and scare the poo poo out of them with a real loud and stern talking to.
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Jul 29, 2017 15:35
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A Pack of Kobolds posted:Welp, we're at the point where any effort made to improve one's life is equivalent to Ayn Rand bootstrapping. Time to pack it in I guess. it's much easier to blame society and everyone else around you than it is to have any type of self-reflection and develop a plan to improve your own life what do I know I'm a white cis male bathing in privilege as I go about my daily life
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Jul 29, 2017 17:36
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The Great Autismo! posted:it's much easier to blame society and everyone else around you than it is to have any type of self-reflection and develop a plan to improve your own life Amizing name/post combo.
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Jul 29, 2017 17:42
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Azuth0667 posted:Amizing name/post combo. do the best I can
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Jul 29, 2017 17:54
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Ziv Zulander posted:PCOS BIll is on a month long probation This is doing nothing to disprove my theory
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Jul 29, 2017 17:55
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I gotta guy who smells like three week old piss and gangrine and he literally pissed himself in the store and my boss won't let me ban him despite the fact that every time he comes in we have to open all the doors to air the place out. His justification is the guy ain't drunk so his money must be good. I've gotten in the habit of squirting his money with hand sanitizer when he hands it to me as petty revenge. gently caress you stinky dude, I'm not walking you to your car quit asking.
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Jul 29, 2017 18:38
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people who come into vent/anecdote threads to give """"advice"""" are only here to suck their own boners and feel edified in their life choices. If you mentally replace their posts with a cummy-sounding slurp slurp slurp, you'll have a better posting experience. Re: being made to stay late... When I was a teen doing the outlet mall circuit, I worked at a GAP outlet. One night, the store was apocalyptically messy, because people are animals. So the store manager pulled the evening floor manager aside and told her not to let us out until the place was spotless. The store closed at 9PM and we were supposed to leave by 10. Cleaning the whole place up would've taken until well after midnight. I was really dumb and naïve. So I wrote up a letter to the store manager saying that locking a bunch of high school students in the store til all hours of the night wouldn't be tolerated, and got my coworkers to sign their names in agreement. The floor manager was a pill addict who gave no shits, so as soon as she realized that we were not having it, she was like "gently caress it" and let us out. As soon as I walked in the next day, management surrounded me like I was a suspicious package and they were the bomb squad. I am amazed they didn't send a diffusing robot out to talk to me instead. They told me there had been a "misunderstanding" and no of course they would never instruct the shift manager to lock us in the store. The thing is, as I mentioned, the shift manager liked getting high and hated giving fucks about anything, so there is no way she would've taken it upon herself to keep us there. Anyway, I didn't get in trouble and they didn't keep us heinously late again. The trick is to basically be an idiot and drunken master your way through confrontations with management, I guess. Epilogue: a couple months later, I walked into the store on a gorgeous summer day. I think the expression on my face must've been really despairing because pillhead manager took one look at me and said, "Just go. Leave before anyone else sees you. I won't tell them you were ever here." I thanked her, turned on my heel, and never looked back. The cherry on top was the angry voicemail telling me that I'd never be hired at another GAP or GAP-related store ever again 
Sitting Here fucked around with this message at 00:32 on Jul 30, 2017 |
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Jul 29, 2017 21:23
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Drunk Nerds posted:Hi! Please respond to the posts that illustrate how going to college while working retail in 2017 is different than in 2005, or confess that you are a mentally challenged troll/sad average intelligence person. What happened? My brother and wife both went to college and graduated after 2005.
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Jul 30, 2017 00:51
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Mammal Sauce posted:What happened? My brother and wife both went to college and graduated after 2005. I'm guessing the global economic meltdown, but that's just a guess
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Jul 30, 2017 01:13
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we didn't have customer toilets in the store I worked at and one time we found a stockpot on the shelf that someone had pissed in and left there
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Jul 30, 2017 02:32
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