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quote:I got a girl pregnant; a teenage girl. My parents had to sell the DQ but they paid her enough to get an abortion, move away, and never press charges.  quote:In a moment of extreme loneliness I reached out to the girl I impregnated via Facebook and asked her to forgive me. She told me I had ruined her life and threatened to call the police if I ever contacted her again. Sounds like that sex you had may not have been 100% consensual. If that's the case, you are a massive piece of poo poo and definitely deserve everything that has happened to you. If not, you're just a garden-variety fuckhead who was raised and spoiled by assholes (nothing you've described about your parents makes them sound any better than you). If you want to know "where you went wrong", the fact that you were raised to be entitled, spoiled, and lazy by two assholes is where you should start; nonetheless you still retain the ultimate responsibility for your own life. It's difficult to say what you should be capable of doing; I can't call you stupid because a lot of the mistakes you've listed can be attributed to laziness and apathy rather than abject stupidity. The fact that you recognize what a POS you were and are willing to apologize to the girls you hurt shows that you have in your favor at least the ability to objectively admit to your mistakes and puts some self-awareness and moral responsibility to your credit; especially since your apology seems sincere and not just an attempt at pity. That at least, puts you ahead of quite a few people. If you're willing to try tapping into that same bit of self-awareness and responsibility and apply it to other areas of your life, you may have a chance of still making a decent life for yourself. It all depends on what you want. You won't be a rich spoiled puppy again, that's for sure, but it sounds like you've been humbled enough that you'd appreciate a decent job with a wife and kids that love you. The first step is overcoming your severe depression and the self-destruction of your body. You obviously have a lot of depression and anger at yourself, but you have to overcome it through a lot of therapy and help. Your drug and eating issues are incidental to this. If you're really not that dumb, give school another shot, start with a cheap community college, and work toward a practical field.
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Aug 2, 2017 16:30
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yeah I eat rear end posted:It's 3 beers over an entire day, who cares. It's 3 beers "literally" "every day." (I will note that the original wording could instead be interpreted as saying that's the most he ever drinks, but I think it's a stretch.) yeah I eat rear end posted:Oh please, if he only does it in the work week that is within the guidelines for low risk drinking, maybe barely above it if he does it on the weekend too. It's a drinking habit, but not a particularly unhealthy one. If he is telling the truth, he doesn't binge drink, hell he doesn't even get drunk. Unless you're a prohibitionist, calling him an alcoholic at risk of cirrhosis is an extreme overreaction. You seriously think that three drinks every single day is not a sign of alcoholism. What experiences led you to make that judgment?
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Aug 2, 2017 16:36
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He could just not live in the US. People drink more around the world and don't see it as a sign of alcoholism at all.
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Aug 2, 2017 16:39
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If everyone were super chill and way more sophisticated than dumb puritanical Americans, he probably wouldn't be so worried about getting fired
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Aug 2, 2017 16:42
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i like nice words
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I may be wrong, but don't you have to get drunk to be a drunk?
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Aug 2, 2017 16:43
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Audax posted:He could just not live in the US. People drink more around the world and don't see it as a sign of alcoholism at all. This isn't puritainism at work here, it's the simple fact that 3 drinks a day for several years will have a serious physical and mental health impact, full stop That said, I don't think there's anything particularly wrong with wanting to carry a slight buzz through the workday
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Aug 2, 2017 16:44
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Not a Children posted:This isn't puritainism at work here, it's the simple fact that 3 drinks a day for several years will have a serious physical and mental health impact, full stop Post your sources (or preferably, don't) because the health guidelines agreed to by most of the world say you are wrong.
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Aug 2, 2017 16:47
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Unless he's drinking Russian Imperial Stouts, I don;t think one beer every 5 hours or so is gonna get anyone buzzed.
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Aug 2, 2017 16:48
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He's a textbook alcoholic. I've been to liquor abuse counseling
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Aug 2, 2017 16:48
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Solice Kirsk posted:Unless he's drinking Russian Imperial Stouts, I don;t think one beer every 5 hours or so is gonna get anyone buzzed. If I had to pick one way to be an alcoholic this would be it 
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Aug 2, 2017 16:50
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If you drink 3 drinks a day minimum and binge on top of that sometimes, then yeah it's a problem, but if we take the fesh at face value and that's both the minimum and maximum he drinks, it's a not-great habit but it's so far down it's hardly worth piling on to him about cirrhosis and all that. It'd be like saying a guy with a mild cough is definitely going to get pneumonia and die.
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Aug 2, 2017 16:56
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Cirrhosis is a myth spread by Big Water anyway, so who cares?
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Aug 2, 2017 16:58
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OK Beergoon, you either have to start drinking more or less so the thread can reach a consensus. It's the only way.
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Aug 2, 2017 17:07
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Alcoholic is a pretty poorly defined word and has way more to do with the state of mind of the individual, the reasons for drinking, and the impact of the drinking on the life of the individual than a textbook definition. The term alcoholic has too much baggage and conjures images of a drunk who hasn't shaved in a few days and is abusive towards his wife and kids. That may be one form of alcoholism, but it certainly isn't all or even the most common. It's such a broad term that I don't like to use it. I think alcohol consumption is best viewed through the lens of dependency. Are you chemically dependent on it? Are you emotionally dependent on it? If it's the former, that's a problem that requires real medical intervention and as soon as possible. Chemical dependency is going to lead to extensive liver and brain damage. Emotional dependency is an entirely different beast. Are you drinking because you just can't deal with the world without the effects of alcohol or are you drinking because you have some other issue and you're self-medicating? I've known people who definitely appeared to be "alcoholics" in the traditional sense, but they ultimately didn't "need" alcohol. Once they got their other poo poo sorted, worked out relationship problems, saw a counselor, solved their employment issues, finished university, and so on, the drinking fell to the wayside. The danger is that because the person turned to it as a crutch before, they might turn to it as a crutch again. Some people can handle it, some can't. There's no universal solution. Assuming this guy is drinking three and only three beers and these are regular 4-5% beers, he's almost certainly not chemically dependent. The average person can process a beer in an hour, so if he's having one for breakfast, which I'm assuming is between 6-8am, that's processed before he has his second beer at noon (and maybe even before he gets to work) and the lunch one is processed before he has his dinner beer between 5 and 6. That means he's probably not going through withdrawal all day every day as the alcohol is flushed out of his body. The thing that says "emotionally dependent" to me is that he has to have one before work. So either he's suffering from depression or hates his job or just can't face the day without a beer every couple of hours. Regardless, he should probably seek counseling. A lot of jobs require you to have a 0.0 blood alcohol level if you're on site, so even one beer every couple of hours would be a big no no. This could be because he operates heavy machinery or is a high paid engineer in a factory. Either way, he's around dangerous poo poo and the company can't afford to have his judgment impaired in the slightest. I had a girlfriend who was doing an internship at a paper mill for a chemical engineering degree and she'd get randomly checked throughout the week to make sure she was stone-cold sober. So yeah he could potentially be fired. Now he if he's just some number cruncher in an office, it probably violates the company's code of ethics, but it might not be fireable or even dangerous in a real sense. It's more a cultural violation than a real serious offense. The beer at lunch and the beer after dinner get less weird when you get outside of the United States, even during the workweek. And if he was a construction worker in Southeast Asia he'd be expected to be drinking on the job all day every day. So it varies I guess.
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Aug 2, 2017 17:11
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The 1 hour myth is so pervasive. 
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Aug 2, 2017 18:12
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Any kind of pattern drinking can be considered minor alcoholism. Hell I've heard an AA "story" about a guy who bi he drank 1 day a year (4th of July??) and didn't touch booze be rest of the year and he's considered an alcoholic. Realistically 3 beers spread throughout day is probably completely fine IMO. Also, much respect OP. I used to drink a beer on the way to work for a while just cause why not.
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Aug 2, 2017 18:15
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got any sevens posted:The 1 hour myth is so pervasive. Even if you use the lower end of this range and assume the poster is 100 pounds (which would be very generous considering what forum we post on), he'd be fine after 4 hours, which is roughly how often he has a beer. The point is he's either sober or just as good as sober every time he has a drink.
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Aug 2, 2017 18:16
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got any sevens posted:The 1 hour myth is so pervasive. You notice that the chart maxes out at a weight of 240lbs when your average goon is at least 350. I'm extrapolating here but at 350, your BAC level for one beer is probably 0.0%.
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Aug 2, 2017 18:20
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got any sevens posted:The 1 hour myth is so pervasive. nice to know I'm legally intoxicated after one loving beer.  and I'm not an alcoholic, I'm just a drunk.
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Aug 2, 2017 18:22
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I once blew a .18 when I was getting arrested after a bar fight. The cop thought it was hilarious that I was still talking and acting fairly normally. Also one of my friends is a cop and he said that .08 has barely even measurable differences in motor skills compared to .00 and he thinks they lowered the legal limit mainly to fill more prisons with cheap labor. Don't know if I believe that, but he's adamant that you'll pass a police sobriety test at .08.
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Aug 2, 2017 18:34
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loquacius posted:NOT POSTING: a list of situations in which someone apparently thinks rape is acceptable Wait, wait, lemme guess, Edgelord Ferretball's old quote: ferretball posted:99% of the time rape is reprehensible. 99% of the time rape is an action so horrific it deserves universal contempt. But there are rare instances in which even the act of rape can in fact be justified. Here are four off the top of my head:
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Aug 2, 2017 18:41
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Solice Kirsk posted:I once blew a .18 when I was getting arrested after a bar fight. The cop thought it was hilarious that I was still talking and acting fairly normally. Also one of my friends is a cop and he said that .08 has barely even measurable differences in motor skills compared to .00 and he thinks they lowered the legal limit mainly to fill more prisons with cheap labor. Don't know if I believe that, but he's adamant that you'll pass a police sobriety test at .08. Reaction times are noticeably impaired by 0.04 so your friend is an idiot.
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Aug 2, 2017 18:45
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Irradiation posted:Reaction times are noticeably impaired by 0.04 so your friend is an idiot. yep everyone's metabolism is the exact same and no one develops a tolerance for alcohol ever. 
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Aug 2, 2017 18:51
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Triangle Shirt Factotum posted:Wait, wait, lemme guess, Edgelord Ferretball's old quote: That's the one. People have sent in copypasta as confessions in the past which made it through because I hadn't seen it before, so there's precedent here. At any rate it wasn't worth posting even if it was sincere.
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Aug 2, 2017 18:53
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Irradiation posted:Reaction times are noticeably impaired by 0.04 so your friend is an idiot. Eh, I told him I've gotten buzzed off a beer or two before, but he insists they stopped doing the impairment tests because most people aren't really drunk enough to be a danger to anyone. He is an idiot though.
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Aug 2, 2017 19:02
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sneakyfrog posted:yep everyone's metabolism is the exact same and no one develops a tolerance for alcohol ever. Wrong. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2764986/#R30 quote:Subjective responses after drinking may also differ in very heavy drinkers compared to novice or light drinkers, with the former group anticipating less intoxication and underestimating post-drinking intoxication levels relative to the latter group (Gabrielli et al., 1991). However, on other responses, such as divided attention skills, very heavy drinkers are not more tolerant to alcohol's impairing effects compared to novice drinkers (see Mitchell, 1985). Yes you can develop a tolerance and perform some tasks fine, but if you need to do something that requires paying attention to multiple things, i.e. driving, you're no better off. Irradiation fucked around with this message at 19:15 on Aug 2, 2017 |
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Aug 2, 2017 19:04
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I feel like those are dated studies, what with all the advances in the human body and beer technology since the mid 90's.
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Aug 2, 2017 19:11
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 I dunno. but according to that chart I should be at a lethal BAC once a week or so if that chart scales. I havent been dead yet havent even felt like dead yet so....
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Aug 2, 2017 19:35
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What's with the influx of goons piling into threads and calling everyone an alcoholic any time alcohol is mentioned lately?
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Aug 2, 2017 19:39
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Arven posted:What's with the influx of goons piling into threads and calling everyone an alcoholic any time alcohol is mentioned lately? i dunno friendo, but if people need a target I'm quite fine with being a token whipping boy and much more worthy, unlike mr 3 beers over here.
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Aug 2, 2017 19:41
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lol if you get drunk when drinking an entire bottle of Vodka. Like seriously I drink occasionally with out any real habit, but I don't get drunk almost ever, and I drink heeeeavily, have since I was 12.
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Aug 2, 2017 20:14
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Solice Kirsk posted:This is why when I'm buried I wanna have a headstone that reads: I prefer (lets hope the message still parses accurately 1000 years from now): This place is not a place of honor…no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here… nothing valued is here. What is here is dangerous and repulsive to us. This message is a warning about danger. The danger is in a particular location… it increases toward a center… the center of danger is here… of a particular size and shape, and below us. The danger is still present, in your time, as it was in ours. The danger is to the body, and it can kill. The form of the danger is an emanation of energy. The danger is unleashed only if you substantially disturb this place physically. This place is best shunned and left uninhabited.
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Aug 2, 2017 20:45
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Solice Kirsk posted:Eh, I told him I've gotten buzzed off a beer or two before, but he insists they stopped doing the impairment tests because most people aren't really drunk enough to be a danger to anyone. He is an idiot though. If you have any alcohol in your system it's the cop's judgement whether the want to ticket you for DUI, at least in washington Turtlicious posted:lol if you get drunk when drinking an entire bottle of Vodka. Like seriously I drink occasionally with out any real habit, but I don't get drunk almost ever, and I drink heeeeavily, have since I was 12. I wonder if there's a relation 
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Aug 2, 2017 20:53
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I think that's 
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Aug 2, 2017 21:15
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got any sevens posted:The 1 hour myth is so pervasive. Sure, but my point still stands. He's basically sober between beers and 100% sober well before his first beer of the day. Also, you don't have to be at 0.0% to start showing symptoms of withdrawal. Anyway, in Minnesota you can totally skip the field sobriety bullshit if you want. It's not considered evidence since it's entirely subjective. Police administer it specifically to build a case justifying asking you to take the breathalyzer. "He was acting uncoordinated so I asked him to blow." Basically they're never not going to ask you to blow so you should save yourself the time and dignity and just go straight to it (I am not a lawyer). I got to watch my 60 year old dad hop on one leg on an icy incline in the middle of February before blowing a 0.01 and being sent on his way. The officer actually challenged him on having drunk at all. My dad said there was no way in hell he could do that poo poo at his age.
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Aug 2, 2017 21:33
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So like, I can drink a half bottle of vodka a night and still feel type pretty legibly. I guess that means gently caress all your dumb 'science' poo poo I'm good to drive.
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Aug 2, 2017 22:03
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I heard that the 0.08 limit is like half of what the studies that were done around the time when it was implemented suggested would be the actual point of "too impaired to drive" but MADD threw a fit about that and now we have 0.08.
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Aug 2, 2017 22:04
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COMRADES posted:I heard that shut up
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Aug 2, 2017 22:35
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That rape screed is really weird although I love how in the first one they need to make clear that the guy doing the raping is black. Nowhere else is race even brought up but for some reason you NEED to know in that first one the guy doing the raping is a black man.
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Aug 2, 2017 22:53
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When I first started drinking it took a decent amount to get me drunk and then a lot of health poo poo happened and I'm 30+ pounds below my heaviest and 15+ pounds below my life average so now I know why I can get toasted off two drinks. I don't drink when there's any chance of me driving and that looks like a good thing with that chart in mind!
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Aug 3, 2017 01:25
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