Tunicate posted:

no, really, the growth of the human eye is regulated by the amount of light it receives, and the modern lifestyle of staying indoors all the time makes the eyeball conclude ' u r in a cave all day, guess u only need to see 6 feet in front of u, ur welcome'.

Samizdata posted:

I wish I knew who that was so I could bring up increased sample size.

If there were say, 100 million people in the world 10 years ago that got the 'tism at a 1% of population rate, that's 100000 people. If there are now, say one billion people, that 1% now equals 100000000, so yeah, there's more cases that previously in a purely numeric fashion. Although the rate of occurrence remains the same.

Yes, I KNOW the numbers are unrealistic, but I am tired and hungry and lazy tonight, so you get what you get.

children overboard posted:

Me: ::stands, heels together, hands behind back::



"I have many, many more of these. Please let me know if you would like to hear another."

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

Also more people per capita being diagnosed as having aspergmatism doesn't mean more people have aspergmatism. It may mean we are now better at recognising the symptoms, that the diagnostic criteria have been widened, or so on. All of which means that 300 years ago we might think "gosh Dave is such a weirdo" whereas now we think "gosh Dave is such a sperg".

To look at it you'd think that rates of autism in girls or black kids has massively increased recently, for example, whereas it's more just that autistic symptoms are now seen as, like, being evidence of autism in demographic groups outside of middle class white boys.

children overboard posted:

Me: ::stands, heels together, hands behind back::



"I have many, many more of these. Please let me know if you would like to hear another."

children overboard posted:

Me: ::stands, heels together, hands behind back::



"I have many, many more of these. Please let me know if you would like to hear another."

hyperhazard posted:

The only thing I believe is that this guy wears a vest and tie to work.

life is killing me posted:

I'm sure the pizza delivery man was super interested in this flat earth fellow and what he had to say, and not at all just enduring this guy's diatribe so he could at least have a small glimmer of hope of being tipped

Tunicate posted:

you have glasses because you didn't listen to your mom and go play outside. it's gods will

children overboard posted:

"I have many, many more of these. Please let me know if you would like to hear another."

BrigadierSensible posted:

In fact everything is god's will, except those pesky dinosaur bones, they were put there by satan, and God just didn't care enough to get rid of them.

yeah I eat rear end posted:

Flat earthers are the worst because something deep in my mind says they have to be trolling/joking, but they are so adamant about it I don't even know anymore. In any case, debating them is pointless because even if you explain their supposed "proof" away they have an endless amount of "yeah ok shill but what about THIS picture" up their sleeve and will keep going until you give up.

Trebek posted:

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

Also more people per capita being diagnosed as having aspergmatism doesn't mean more people have aspergmatism. It may mean we are now better at recognising the symptoms, that the diagnostic criteria have been widened, or so on. All of which means that 300 years ago we might think "gosh Dave is such a weirdo" whereas now we think "gosh Dave is such a sperg".

To look at it you'd think that rates of autism in girls or black kids has massively increased recently, for example, whereas it's more just that autistic symptoms are now seen as, like, being evidence of autism in demographic groups outside of middle class white boys.

Sir Lemming posted:

It's like a Trump post, except for the part about actually working a day in his life

Trebek posted:

quote:

Unfiltered Story #32800
USA | Unfiltered | August 9, 2017

(In music class, we are taught a variety of holiday songs that I like. I am Hispanic and very obviously look it, and most of my classmates think I only speak Spanish, which is not true. The music teacher leads a song.)

Me: *singing enthusiastically* “O Hanukkah o Hanukkah come light the menorah, let’s have a party we’ll all dance a hora! Gather round the table we’ll give you a treat! Shiny tops to play with, and pancakes to eatttt!!!!”

(The rest of the kids were whispering that I was a Spanish speaking Jew the next day. Well then.)

quote:

Unfiltered Story #32797
Los Angeles, CA | Unfiltered | August 6, 2017

(I was at boarding school when I was 16. I got called to the Headmistress’ office. She places in front of me a flier from a popular pornographic magazine that was addressed to me offering one free magazine.)

HM: (visibly upset) “What is this all about?”

(I immediately notice a very specific misspelling of my last name that only a popular CD catalogue company uses for me)

Me: “Well I don’t know why they’d offer a 16 year old a porn magazine, but it looks like they managed to get my address from [CD company]”

(She’s not entirely convinced I’m being forthcoming and grills me further until she’s somewhat convinced I’m innocent)

HM: “Okay, well check the box you don’t want the magazine and I’ll send it off.”

(I check the box in front of her and she keeps it mail it off personally. About a week later I’m called back to her office.)

HM: (Tosses porn mag in front of me that is sealed in unopened plastic wrap addressed to me and the same misspelling) “What the hell [my name]?!”

Me: “Look. I checked the box right in front of you! You mailed it off! I couldn’t legally get this even if I wanted to! Do you really think I’d be stupid enough to try knowing my mail has to go through faculty before it gets yo me?!”

(Again not convinced grills me further and finally let’s me go back to class. Some months later I was getting in to a lot if trouble, unrelated, and I was being expelled. The process takes a few days as I’m away from home, they have me hanging out in a small office by myself to keep me away from the rest of the student body. The vise-Headmistress comes in at some point, with the same mag, still unopened.)

VMS: (plops mag in front of me) “Want to tell me about this?”

(Not sure why they kept this and what it really mattered given the circumstances. But I explained exactly what I told the HM. It seemed to convince her and she tossed the mag in the trash and left. I was alone for hours reading a book and I decided to pull the mag out of the trash. Browsed it, had a good wank, used a page to clean up, carefully placed it back in the packaging the offered to take the trash out. Shortly thereafter I was on train ride home.)

life is killing me posted:

Hey guys I do millions a year with my venture capitalist firm, but I started out as a cashier and some guy who slit his wrists and smashed some stuff somehow needed to be shot but I overcame this tragedy to have a hot little wife and a ton of sports cars and lots and lots of money

Did I tell you guys I run a very successful business now and have lots of stuff, I don't like to brag but this information was necessary to tell the story of a man who had no money and was desperate to the point of self-harm and now I'm doing awesome despite his miserable existence

Please love me

Haifisch posted:

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

These technically didn't happen in the sense that nothing happened. Why would you write and submit such a useless wet fart of a story? Dear diary, today my life was boring and pointless, again.

yeah I eat rear end posted:

the other boiled down to just "I jerked off". The fact that both were probably embellished compared to what really happened is just sad.

Haifisch posted:

It's like how nobody dies of 'old age' anymore because we figure out the real cause of death. Or how mental illness is an actual medical thing now instead of you being possessed by demons/intentionally being a pain in the rear end/whatever.

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

Also, if you spend $15 on Macca's instead of $30, you won't be as fat AND will have spent less money too.

Turtlicious posted:

actually you probably still will, because only 1% of the human population is actually capable of changing their body weight.

Samizdata posted:

Slit his wrists with JUST the hilt of a sword. NOT the sword (as he makes a point of saying how they thought it was all of a piece), but THE HILT...

Turtlicious posted:

actually you probably still will, because only 1% of the human population is actually capable of changing their body weight.

Avenging_Mikon posted:

Preeeeeeeetty sure that's bullshit, unless you mean "99% of people don't give a drat about trying." I've lost 50 lbs so far in just under 2 years, and I'm not part of any 1%.

life is killing me posted:

Crazy guy using the hilt of a sword to try and cut his wrists, a sword which is not all sharp on the hilt or even the blade because it's fake, doesn't surprise me nearly as much as someone thinking that a fictitious sword would sound right at home with a statue of George Washington.

Haifisch posted:

But see, a porn mag company offered him a free magazine out of the blue(did they ever do that back when porn mags were a thing people bought? it seems pointless for multiple reasons), and that's hijinks.