Taiwan Number 1

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Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
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so are weather alerts a vile foreign invention or something

# ? Aug 24, 2017 04:40

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# ? May 16, 2024 19:04

Accretionist: Nov 7, 2012; I BELIEVE IN STUPID CONSPIRACY THEORIES

Hey now, it was a major typhoon with only ~10 fatalities.

SFW Videos:

Roaches seeking high-ground
Breakers stopping waves from hitting marina (← engineering porn)
Construction site office tipping over

# ? Aug 24, 2017 04:42

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

My dad just called me. He always calls me when he's out walking, complaining about the main problems he has in Bangkok while out walking... you can guess.

Him: "Why are there so many of them?"
Me: "So many of what?"
Him: "Chinamen. They're everywhere here. You can just tell by looking at them that they they have no money. They dress like poo poo. Why do they all dress like poo poo?"
Me: "That's how they do in the Mainland."
Him: "I haven't seen a good looking one yet. The women are all buck-toothed. The Thais don't even benefit from them. They fly in here in their stupid groups, eating at this guy's cousin's restaurant, riding on this guy's brother's bus company, staying in that guy's hotel. None of this China money goes to the Thai people. Can't any of these shitheads travel alone? What is with these huge loving groups and some guy with a megaphone? It's bullshit. God drat it."
Me: "Well, that's what they do here, too. It's what they enjoy on the Mainland."
Him: "Oh, I know. Hong Kong people hate them. I hate them. poo poo, does anybody like them? I heard Singapore banned their groups. I hope Thailand does it."

Then he started talking about his organic vegetables.

Fojar38 posted:

so are weather alerts a vile foreign invention or something

No. In SZ they sent two SMS to every phone in the city the day before the storm, and maybe four of the day of the storm, reminding people to stay away from the sea, rivers, mountains, and other places, and it get to a safe place and stay there. It reminded that schools were closed and people should just hang out at home. Of course nobody cares.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 04:46

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

I was just looking through one of the delivery apps and found a dildo delivery shop.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:12

Pirate Radar: Apr 18, 2008; You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Haier, just curious, but has your dad ever seen The Big Lebowski? Because, dude, not the preferred nomenclature.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:22

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Pirate Radar posted:

Haier, just curious, but has your dad ever seen The Big Lebowski? Because, dude, not the preferred nomenclature.

I am sure he has, but as a guy that has spent nearly 50 years of his life between Japan, Hong Kong, Thailand, India, Vietnam, and other places in SEA, he is very open about his dislike of Mainland Chinese and Koreans (mostly due to trying business in Korea back in the 80s, when they were way more nationalistic than now). There's not much else to say.

Grand Fromage posted:

I was just looking through one of the delivery apps and found a dildo delivery shop.

How many did you order? What size and color?

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:44

Nanomashoes: Aug 18, 2012

https://twitter.com/DreyerChina/status/900558921613455361

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:48

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Haier posted:

How many did you order? What size and color?

I haven't yet, what do you recommend?

The one that appears to have five tips is odd. Maybe that's just the range of motion it can be bent into.

There's also plastic vaginas.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:53

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

You can press a button and within the hour a man on a motorcycle will bring you a dildo.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:55

TTerrible: Jul 15, 2005

They should have listed that as one of China's four great accomplishments instead of high speed rail.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:58

hailthefish: Oct 24, 2010

The unnamed country can only look on with envy.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 05:58

WarpedNaba: Feb 8, 2012; Being social makes me swell!

big time bisexual posted:

train driver loves a kip

https://my.mixtape.moe/xwnmbu.mp4

They just put the bullet trains back into action, too! Gonna be a fun ride.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 06:09

chinese hair cave: Aug 23, 2017; by Cyrano4747

Grand Fromage posted:

You can press a button and within the hour a man on a motorcycle will bring you a dildo.

have fun when the toxic plastics melt your butthole inside out

# ? Aug 24, 2017 06:17

Fauxtool: Oct 21, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

China can only look on in shame as all the dildos are modeled after the men of the unnamed country

# ? Aug 24, 2017 06:49

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

Grand Fromage posted:

I haven't yet, what do you recommend?

what's the censored character say?

# ? Aug 24, 2017 07:24

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

I can't see it clearly but I found one in my dictionary that looks right and says it's "to prohibit". So I guess balls and tips aren't allowed to be shown?

# ? Aug 24, 2017 07:27

Coolguye: Jul 6, 2011; Required by his programming!

Nanomashoes posted:

https://twitter.com/DreyerChina/status/900558921613455361

I'm genuinely surprised that a state run newspaper would admit there are any problems, anywhere in china

# ? Aug 24, 2017 08:28

Fauxtool: Oct 21, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

so what is wrong with large veins on my balls? Some sort of TCM bullshit?

These men arent reproducing, population problem solved.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 08:42

Velisarius: Nov 1, 2009

Someone care to explain why Americans act sensitive around the use of Chinamen?

# ? Aug 24, 2017 09:10

Pirate Radar: Apr 18, 2008; You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Velisarius posted:

Someone care to explain why Americans act sensitive around the use of Chinamen?

It's historically been used as a racial slur and a lot of Asian-Americans find it offensive

# ? Aug 24, 2017 09:25

Pretty good: Apr 16, 2007

My dad was bitching about putting together a bench and said that "the instructions were written by a chinaman or something" and I told him maybe don't say chinaman if you don't want people to think you're a racist or a time traveling racist and he got extremely huffy about how he's Not Allowed To Say Chinaman Anymore

# ? Aug 24, 2017 09:31

Atlas Hugged: Mar 12, 2007; Put your arms around me,
fiddly digits, itchy britches
I love you all

Dildos on my screen at my new job. Thanks China thread.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 09:42

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Fauxtool posted:

so what is wrong with large veins on my balls? Some sort of TCM bullshit?

These men arent reproducing, population problem solved.

Everything is TCM bullshit. Even many women believe that if a man ejacs more than a few times per week his kidneys will shrivel up and he will get sick and ruin his health permanently. When you shoot too often, all of your life force blows out your dick. Even women can't have orgasms in this system, because female orgasm is the same as ejaculation, and she'll "get sick" if she has one more than like once per week. I'm not making that up. The same guys that spew this bullshit probably 'bate daily. "Large testicle veins" doesn't make sense in the slightest. People here are loving retarded about this, and no amount of sex education classes will fix it because it is burned into their brains from birth.

quote:

Excessive Sexual Activity

i.e., leading to ejaculation or orgasm

Depletes Kidney Jing, mostly in males.
Male sexual fluids are external manifestation of Kidney Jing: hence loss of these lead to temporary loss of Kidney Jing. Female sexual fluids primarily Jin-Ye.
Normally this is made up (by postnatal Jing) and does not lead to depletion. However, when sexual activity is excessive, body does not have time to restore the Jing.

What is "excessive" = resulting in marked fatigue, especially if accompanied by dizziness, blurring of vision, low back pain, weak knees, and frequent urination.

Adjust sexual activity according to constitution, age, physical condition. (See chart in book pg. 138 as broad guideline).

Seasons: increase in Spring; decrease in Winter.

It sound when someone is drunk. Drunk off your own dick fiddling. LOL

# ? Aug 24, 2017 09:43

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Can you imagine making a medical system based off unscientific poetry about geology and nature?

http://www.itmonline.org/5organs/kidney.htm

quote:

The kidney is the ocean of the human body. Since oceans are situated on a lower level than the earth's streams and rivers, they draw every one of them to form one large body of water. Oceans may appear vast and inexhaustible, yet they still drain off some of their seemingly unlimited supply. One way of drainage is called 'going to ruins,' meaning the water drains down into the earth from where it will not return. The other way of drainage is called 'dwelling with the stars,' meaning the water steams toward the sky and later rains down to earth again, where it dissipates into rivers and streams and eventually returns to the ocean. This is the water that circulates between heaven and earth, always striving to keep an equilibrium between the extreme states of drought and flooding.

In the context of the human body only the kidney can be compared to the workings of this natural cycle. All the essences and fluids of the body's various pathways pour into the kidney. After the kidney has assembled the essential fluids of the body's vessels, it also experiences two ways of drainage: one way is through the sexual urge which draws the essence downward to the sexual centers; once it exits from here it cannot come back into the system, so this is just like the ocean "going to ruins." The other way is the upward dispersal by way of the suctioning affect of true qi, which draws the body's combined essences all the way up to the flower pond (mouth); from here it moves down through the throat into the stomach, lubricating the five organ networks, nourishing all of the body's pathways, and finally returning to the kidney. This is the microcosmic process of ascending and descending that can be compared to the ocean 'dwelling with the stars.'

BRB, going to ruins.

quote:

Water has a tendency to drain downward. The kidney, the lowest of the organ networks, is where the body's water assembles and goes into storage until needed elsewhere. If the kidney function is weak, its storage capability will become inhibited and jing will leak from the body. Due to the Daoist belief that the jing is lost when a man excretes semen (of particular concern, when an elderly man, who already had deficiency of jing through aging, excretes semen), virtually all of the ancient medical texts mention spermatorrhea (a code for release during the disallowed practice of masturbation, wet dreams, and ejaculation during intercourse when the attempt is being made to prevent it) as a condition to be treated, since it indicates a breach of the kidney's function of safeguarding and storing jing. According to the Daoist ideal, except during early adulthood, men should refrain from releasing semen, or, at the very least, experience this infrequently.

Therefore, excessive sexual indulgence by males is considered to be a major health hazard in all genres of traditional Chinese writing. Since most men cannot control their urge to ejaculate, every intercourse means an irrevocable giving away of jing. Although Chinese medical texts consent that this may be affordable for young men (who have a rich supply of jing and who can easily replenish jing through post-natal sources), they generally warn that the health of elderly males will suffer serious consequences from frequent ejaculations. "What gives life will take life" is therefore a common admonition that spans two thousand years of Chinese medical literature.

While most Daoist and medical writings take up both the general topic and the detailed techniques of safeguarding jing, it is the realm of literature which best reflects the Chinese fear of continuous jing loss by way of sexual indulgence. The epic Ming Dynasty novel, Flower In the Golden Vase (Jin Ping Mei), narrates the story of the erotomaniac Ximen Qing who peddles his money and political influence to assemble a harem of six women, then resorts to tonic drugs to bolster his flagging virility, and finally comes to a horrid end after a final ejaculation of "mercury-like fluid, followed by blood and a gust of cold air." A Daoist physician who is called to the deathbed comments: "The candle flickers once the oil is used up." Both mercury and lamp oil are often used metaphors for the kidney jing. To avoid such a gruesome death, the handsome protagonist of the second moralist novel of the Ming dynasty, Prayer Mat of Flesh (Rou Putuan), decided to become a Buddhist hermit, cut off his surgically amplified penis, and utilize his jing for spiritual cultivation.

Although the word jing is synonymous with the Chinese word semen, the seminal fluid represents only one form of jing. Other dense fluid essences such as saliva (particularly the kind that gets spontaneously excreted during meditation), vaginal fluids, breast milk, or blood are all regarded to be different transformations of one and the same jing; these are refined essences. Female "leakage" problems, such as metrorrhagia or leukorrhea occurring in older women, are therefore taken seriously for the same reasons as loss of semen in men. Daoist body science even features a special category called female alchemy (nu dan), wherein adepts are instructed in the conservation of (menstrual) blood and its transformation into physical and spiritual energy.

THE CONSERVATION OF MENSTRUAL BLOOD

5000 years of pulling poo poo out of your rear end.

EDIT: Anyone else want to blow a gust of cold air out your urethra?

Haier fucked around with this message at 09:57 on Aug 24, 2017

# ? Aug 24, 2017 09:53

His Divine Shadow: Aug 7, 2000; I'm not a fascist. I'm a priest. Fascists dress up in black and tell people what to do.

Haier posted:

5000 years of pulling poo poo out of your rear end.

Constipation's a bitch.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 09:57

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Haier posted:

EDIT: Anyone else want to blow a gust of cold air out your urethra?

I'm pretty sure when I was 13 I beat off enough for this to happen

# ? Aug 24, 2017 10:17

WarpedNaba: Feb 8, 2012; Being social makes me swell!

Haier posted:

EDIT: Anyone else want to blow a gust of cold air out your urethra?

Eh, that's not really something I do unless everyone else is doing their party tricks.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 10:23

Kaiju Cage Match: Nov 5, 2012

Grand Fromage posted:

You can press a button and within the hour a man on a motorcycle will bring you a dildo.

What marvelous times we live in.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 11:50

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

Haier posted:

EDIT: Anyone else want to blow a gust of cold air out your urethra?

we get it, you vape

# ? Aug 24, 2017 11:52

Velisarius: Nov 1, 2009

Pirate Radar posted:

It's historically been used as a racial slur and a lot of Asian-Americans find it offensive

Well, Chinese-Americans I imagine. Though the others probably get offended at being considered Chinese.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 12:02

mrbotus: Apr 7, 2009; Patron of the Pants

Is water with a high mineral count mean poisoned with heavy metals?

# ? Aug 24, 2017 12:02

randomcommoner: Sep 6, 2006; it's a-me

nickmeister posted:

Is water with a high mineral count mean poisoned with heavy metals?

No, it could be high in calcium or magnesium which makes it "hard water" but I don't think it has adverse health effects, it'll leave white spots in glass and mess with your plumbing, or with your clothing if you're using it for cleaning. Could also be iron which can make the water look red and is not good for healthy, manganese, nitrates...

Heavy metals are the next step in awfulness from a high mineral content. Things like lead, cadmium, mercury, etc dropped into the water can gently caress people and the ecosystem up for a long time, specially if you don't realize you're drinking them and keep doing so for a long time.

Edit: They're basically two types of stuff that get dissolved in water, high mineral count doesn't mean there are heavy metals present unless specified, heavy metals are some specific elements that have very negative effects most living things.

randomcommoner fucked around with this message at 13:19 on Aug 24, 2017

# ? Aug 24, 2017 13:02

bongwizzard: May 19, 2005; Then one day I meet a man,
He came to me and said,
"Hard work good and hard work fine,
but first take care of head"; Grimey Drawer

Grand Fromage posted:

I'm pretty sure when I was 13 I beat off enough for this to happen

A sound like wailing winter wind was heard.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 13:14

Im Ready for DEATH: Oct 5, 2016

That Air bender guy was cool. I bet it feels good to stand against the wind.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 13:42

whip: Apr 9, 2007; by Lowtax

Haier posted:

I am sure he has, but as a guy that has spent nearly 50 years of his life between Japan, Hong Kong, Thailand, India, Vietnam, and other places in SEA, he is very open about his dislike of Mainland Chinese and Koreans (mostly due to trying business in Korea back in the 80s, when they were way more nationalistic than now). There's not much else to say.

Everyone in Cambodia says they're of Chinese descent. Just ask lol

# ? Aug 24, 2017 17:31